D'y ever wonder how life got like this?

[FrumpyGrumpy]

New to MN but like what I read so far. Struggling to get by day by day at the minute and feeling isolated but not enough to make the effort to join in the 'groups' the whole world seems to think are just what I need!!!!

Have daughter of 4 and girl and boy twins of eight months. Not had time since they were born when all three kids have been well, am I just cursed? Throw in a house move that took 6 months, a partner that works away most of the week and a mother-in-law I can wait another lifetime to deal with and I've ended up the sort of person I used to look at and wonder how life got like that.

Anyone give me hope that when the babes are eighteen months I'll feel better?!! If not, anyone tell me that alternate nights of gin then chocolate is an ok passage through?

Hi Kelly, what a shambles about your car! At least you're mobile again, its a lifeline to me. I tend to like one on ones with someone I know well or really click with so I don't actually have a lot of friends, having the car means I can get out and about and not feel like a prisoner, shopping centres always work well for me! Human life but no pressure to be sociable .

Glad you've got some dead bugs, that at least is a good sign.

I'm sorry to hear about your mum, you will feel it for your kids sake. I have similar with my MIL (who I could rant about for milleniums but will refrain), they don't seem to be able to remember being a child - I remember loads about christmas and in general how I liked adults to talk to me (not too childish when you feel big, age about 7). Children are just little people and so many big people underestimate what their capabilities are. The good thing is they won't remember her not bringing them a lovely gift its just that they would have always remembered getting an exciting one. (I still remember my granny bringing me the most fabulous pencil case from Spain when I was about 5, it was just tat but god I loved it, a matador on the front and filled with pencils and a ruler and a rubber.) Release her from your thinking, it will just pee you off more and think about your kids faces and what a happy time you'll have as a family.

Keep posting.

Mars, you're such a live one! Not a foil hedgehog in sight . Fascinating stuff about your doula course, I nearly got one at the end of each of my pregnancies but chickened out. You sound like you'd have tons to offer. Good luck.

Sleep tight, don't let the ......(is that bad taste humour?), not meant. Sweet dreams instead.

lol and groan at bed bugs. Woke up last night and one was on me - yuck! Seem to be getting bitten less, but I still look like I got chickenpox or soemthign. I'm gettign very odd looks when out!

shopping centers are great - 'cept spend too much. I quite like the park and M&T groups, jsut to be able to have a casual natter without it getting too full on. The mother and toddler group I have discovered has four sets of twins, so it's great to meet mothers that understand. Especially with a pair of crawling fangsters! ANd they love it there.

I'm going to completely forget abt my mother for now. She wants to do camera link at Xmas and stuff, but I told her it not set up. I really don't want to be dwelling on them at Xmas. I guess it is extra hard cos the kids don't have anyone else. DP's family still haven't met the twins, so there will be nothing doing there. I'll jsut love to do proper family get-Togethers for xmAS.

A bit of good news tho, I managed to get in touch witht he landlady, and she was really nice. She was so apolegetic, and is going to cover the costs of treatment, medicines, and anythign else we need, plus give us some towards the kids new bed and compensation. So that's a worry off my mind. We really didn't need the extra expense with moving and Xmas.

Kelly that's great news about your landlady, at least thats something to help pull you through this difficult time. Any more dead bodies lying around your house you murderous wumman you?! How's the xmas shopping?

Christmas has gone on hold for me. DD has taken a really horrible virus, I think the one I had. Been at the doctors twice this week. She's not been herself for about 10 days but this week she deteriorated horribly. Temperature through the roof and not responding much to alternate doses of Calpol/Nurofen, sore throat, bad cough etc. Doc says she has a virus but also a throat or tonsil infection. Today she has ulcers all over inside her mouth as well as pus on the tonsils and her top lip has swollen up with ulcers on it. She is in a lot of discomfort, wants to eat but can't etc. They've given us penicillin for her but the docs are so reluctant to prescibe and said to wait 48 hours to see if she can do without it. I started her on it anyway since she seems so poorly and I'm riddled with guilt over whether thats the right thing to do (since they like their own immunity to build). Didn't get to bed til 3.30am on Thursday night, which was her worst night and then I couldn't sleep for listening out for her. DTs are snuffly and I've crossed my old pack horse legs a few times that they don't succumb. (They had something horrid a few weeks ago but I don't know if its the same.)

So in short xmas shopping stopped and xmas cards undone and may remain so - we'll find out who our true friends are!!!

ANYWAY, that's my groan/update. DP has gone to Tesco (he's only been home one day in two weeks) and I'm ironing (can't you tell? ).

Must be glass of wine time!

Happy nights one and all x.

DD up and on my knee now coughing and not getting much breath. Sad for her. Thats the ironing up the spout .

How goes it with you all?

FG... I hope that there is better health in your household.

Kelly... good news about the landlady and the costs etc.

Life good but extremely busy here!

how is ur dd, fg? that virus sounds awful. fwiw I think you did the right thing starting her straightaway. Let her immunity build on less severe illnesses. I hope she is back to normal before Xmas.

WE've had stomach upsets here, I spent sat night throwing up, but dp took the boys to mandir on sunday and I stayed in bed and recuperated. Was rather nice having a day in bed! I think ds had it first, then the babies, then me. I'm hoping dd has escaped as she is terrible when she is sick.

I bought the kids a coupel of ready beds on saturday, (those sleepign bags with inflatable bed thingys) and demolished their bed. God knows what the neighbours though, we were hurling it all out the window, cos we didn't want to spread the bugs downstairs. We must have picked up over a hundred bugs, and now there are far less, so most of them must have been comign out of that bed. So it looks like we're getting on top of it - fingers crossed.

The dts are doing very well. They seem to be getting the hang of teamwork, and set a path of destruction wherever they go. It's so funny watchingn them though.

how do you cope with jealousy?

ds is becomign very protecive of the dts, and doesn't want to share them with anyone!! He is having fits if dd goes near them, insistign they are 'my friend'. It seemed easier with two of them, but with four of them, it feels liek refereeing a football match!

Oh girls, I hope you've all been having happy times. DD just got worse and worse and we've been in hospital ever since, just home on Tuesday. No time to go into details atm (parents sleeping in room I have pc) but suffice to say I wish I'd had access to you in hospital as there have been grey times. On a slow road to recovery and will be starting a thread on here somewhere to ask about others who have had similar (Kawasaki disease or Stevens Johnston Syndrome (sp?) are the possible diagnosis with final decision in the next few weeks). She is hugely better though and will hopefully make a complete recovery in time. I'm so grateful to see her smile again.

FG... you have my prayers.

Glad she's smiling again.

fg, sorry to hear about your dd, glad she is on the mend. That illness sounds awful, poor dd. Hope the new year is better for you.

Just on briefly and don't know when I'll be back but wanted to wish you all a Happy New Year, we drank (just a little) champagne and toasted being together in some shape or form! Hope you all had lovely holidays, none of us will have had a relaxing one but some things get easier! (No school run yahoo!)

How the beds Kelly? And life in general? Mars is your desk still standing or is it aching under the weight of your mountains of matching silky drawers and boulder holders from Santa?

DP and I finally swapped gifts last night (wrapped in bags, no time or inclination to wrap)I got Bruce Springsteen (ok he was in a DVD shaped box) and a catering pack of after eights . Happy girl! Would like to smear them both up and down my lumpy body!

Hi fg, hope your dd is on the mend?

I think the bbugs are slowly dissapearing. The pest control guy came back to do the top up last week, and we're are only seeing the odd one every couple of days now. I can use upstairs again now which makes life a lot easier - kick them all upstairs when they getting too much.

My dp proposed properly at xmas. It was something we had planned, but I wasn't expecting it til next year soemtime really! I got a lovely ring, three diamonds set in platinum.

Congratulations Kelly! We expect to see photos

FG Happy New Year to you too. My beautiful desk is still all mine I tell you!!!!!!!!

The DTs start playgroup this afternoon. I'm finally gonna have a little time to myself in the afternoons. I'm really looking forward to it, even though the first few weeks will be spent sorting out this house.

Here's hoping that 2006 brings you all nothing but joy and laughter.

have posted a piccie, so can show off my lovely, lovely ring.

WOW Kelly, that's fab news, huge congratulations to you both! Go on spill the detail about how he did it and what he said? Long engagement or wedding date chosen already? That's just lovely news. I have never been a bridesmaid and I fully expect you'll ask me so thats just peachy !

DD is slowly improving. Have hospital tomorrow and thursday. Will post more when more time, sorry, things just been hectic.

You just do what you gotta do FG.

Hope it all goes well in the hospital this week. Much love and prayers!

Have started a thread about dd under Health but as I am totally useless at the technical side I can't work out how to do the fancy "its here" bit! I've seen how to insert it for another site but not this site that thread IYKWIM. Ah, its not important anyway!

Suffice to say the skin and eye hospital appointments went extremely well. Skin say we don't have to go back (except if we feel we need someone to see her) and eyes are clear for now, back in March. All good. We see the consultant on the 16th to chat more. She's still not herself but that will come in time.

Kelly, where are the pics??!! Desperate to see.......

My DTs are going through a particularly funny stage, trying to speak and communicate, they are such a barrow load of work but hilarious.

Mars, its time I went out with DP to the flicks. Seen anything worth recommending lately? p.s. if it had some juicy eye candy for me that'd be even better . Thanks.

Haven't seen anything myself (apart from Narnia) as I've been way too busy... but DS1 recommends:

King Kong
Flightplan
The Producers

Best Friend recommends:

The Constant Gardener

I want to see Brokeback Mountain.

but for now I shall content myself with the West Wing (phwoar Jimmy Smits!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [lust])

my ring piccie is here

I want to go out too. We spent all alst weekend on a spring clean, sorting out stuff we've been putting off for months, ever since we moved in. So I think we deserve a break this weekend. I've seen flightplan - was rather good. Only problem with that was that I saw straight through it right from the start, but that might ahve just been me. narnia is really good, but prob better to go with dd when she gets better.

Hi girls

Kelly fab ring honey, have you made any plans or is it on the back burner til the kids leave home !

Thanks for the Ted Baker suggestion, I don't think we have one near me but it sounds fab. Will try to get to Gap at least, I really can't keep wearing the coat I've got, its good for a light breeze at best and definitely not for snow storms (and I'm sure they're a-comin!!).

Mars, thanks for the info on the flicks, we have arranged a babysitter for the end of the month so here's hoping there still something decent on then. Y'know the last thing I saw with DP was The Interpreter which you recommended, was that last Summer?

DD is doing well, I get days I feel really sad about it all, I haven't quite managed to write it all down, just bits and pieces on the Health thread. It all came so suddenly and with hindsight I felt quite shocked but I just went into coping mode. I'm torn between trying to get it out my system and trying to say its gone, leave it behind. We have another heart scan and a meeting with the consultant on Monday, her skin is good and her eyes haven't shown a problem so far. Probably back to school sometime next week but I'm feeling a bit down about that. Her body and face still shows signs of all the huuuge blisters and kids can be cruel.....her humour and confidence at home is almost totally back but its with other kids she's more reserved. I guess I just have to bite the bullet, it wouldn't be helping not to let her build her own confidence by achieving on her own.

She finds being out in the playground for nearly an hour at lunchtime a long time, esp when sometimes there's no game to get involved in (not that she's picked on just that some days there's a game happening that doesn't need anyone else). She's young for school and used to nursery where the girls organized games. She cried last term one morning when she said she sometimes just sat on the wall until the bell and that it was freezing. No wonder, I'm freezing just waiting the 5 minutes I wait at schools out time! (I think maybe this was around the time she started to be unwell but we were both unaware.)

Oh, I'm having a ramble...... I just love her to bits and she's clever and funny and I can't protect her from everything and thats hard.

They don't tell you about how much love hurts when you're at the maternity clinic do they?

Hmm, no ted baker, and talk of snow - I think u must be up north somewhere!

I know how you feel about ur dd. I should really be thinking about gettign ds into school, but I don't want him to go. Like you say, kids can be cruel, and I'm really not sure how he would cope. He actually gettign his confidence a bit and I don't want to batter it. We started him on fish oil supplements early Dec. and it really seems to be kicking in. He started singing in sains one day last week. It was a mishmash version of the one about tedybears in a bed- roll over, roll over? It was as he was putting bottles on the belt. I nearly cried in the middle of sains. I had such a grin on my face, the checkout girl must have wondered what I was on! ds is 3.5, and that was the first time I have ever heard him sing.

I hope ur dd is just still adjusting to school. Do they have new intakes through the year? She might find new friends there if they do. Dd's class has a big bunch of newbies jsut started. Or another thought, couldn't she invite some girls round for playdates after school?

I'm in bonnie Scotland Kelly so def snow sometime soon! I'm sure there's a Ted Baker somewhere but probably not in my limited driving patch! Unless on the web.....

That's a lovely story about your ds, had me filling up thinking about you and him. I've heard/read great things about fish oil supplements. When's his appt at the hospital?

Just one intake every August at dd school. Everyone is being 6 and she's not 5 yet so I think that probably has something to do with how she and me feel. However, she is a bright girl with a dry sense of humour and I see a lot of me in her really. I'm a one to one person and not at all good in a large group. Thing is quite a few of the kids in her class have sent lovely pictures and cards since she'd been in hospital before school finished up - I think they are fine really, just needing some more time to adjust to school. Nursery was too lovely!!

I took her out for a lovely lunch today (just me and her). It was really nice and I didn't feel time pressured at all for a change. For me it was to have her chat to myself at a day/time we would not normally have together and to relish a moment before she goes back - for her I told her it was to celebrate being well again. We took our time and ate warm chocolate cake and cups of hot tea after and laughed all the way along the road to the car. I amazed myself because even though we had a hellish time parking and the cafe's toilets were broken (and I had to hold her over the drain outside!!) it was all fun.

Sorry I'm blabbing on.....

How's your bed situation? I mean the bugs/beds not your sex life .

mind your own, lol. I think it's gettign there, but we've seen two or three in the last week, so I'm not sure if we don't need a thrird treatment. I haven't hoovered upstairs in three weeks - otherwise the chemical goes up the spout. I'm hoping to avoid them coming for the third time.

I'm still waiting for ds's appointments. I feel a bit disallusioned, as I was sure this time I was actually going to get appointments straightaway and not jsut get stuck on some obscure waiting list. I think I'm going to have to call the HV again, but I'm allergic to HVs, and have been tryign to avoid it.

It must make things harder for ur dd s so much younger than the others, I'm sure she'll be fine tho. Everyone will prob want to make a big fuss of her if they know what's been going on.

Oh Bum and Tits!

Why did we get doublers? And why do they get MORE knackering as they get older? I'm sure I used to feel less sleep deprived when I was sleeping only 40 minutes at a time......

Mine saying "hu-wo" a lot and it makes me laugh soooo much, especially when unprompted.

Sleep well all x.

p.s. dd back to school today and it was hard but I guess we've done the worst bit.

My two are trying to go through the night. DT2 has done 2 all nighters, DT1 has done 1.

I don't think I remember what sleep is lol.

They are now going through till about 5am though. Can't wait till they sleep till 7am. That would be heavenly bliss. That said, I can hear the wee terrors now. Not sure what's going on, but not going up there.

You can tell I was out at bedtime.