The under/over/around 1 Twins thread for support, tips on how to survive and enjoy twin parenthood!

[DreamingOfPeace]

BB3: dcda non id girls Sept 2011 (plus ds)
TwelveLeggedWalk: DCDA DD and DS 14.09.11 (PFBs)
Tiggersreturn twin boys (?!) (plus ds age 5)
Wherearemyearplugs twins (plus ds)
Ceeveebee b/g twins 21.11.11, PFBs
minesapintofwine: non-id boys 02/02/2012. dcs 1&2/pfb on good days.
ClaireMarathonFeeder: Boy/girl twins born 08/02/2012, no3&4, dd1 (2001) and dd2 (2004)
rednellie nonID boys 13.03.2012 + DD 03.02.10
Lemele: id boys (plus ds)
Skitoo : DCDA Non ID Boys, 01.04.12 DC 1&2
DreamingofPeace: dcda non id boys, 4.4.12 DC 2&3 (DD Sept 2010)
beyoglu: dcda non id girls 21.4.12
Bigboobsatlast ID twin boys 30.04.12 DC #2&3 (DD Feb 2010)
Scollister mcda girls 3.5.12 plus DD age 4
Twin2makes4 mcda girls plus 2 ds,age 8 & 4

Again, sorry for mistakes, doing this from my phone!

Settle in ladies :)

there I am in awe that you have lost count! I count the days. Oh, I hope your coldy things don't get too bad! There should be an exemption from illnesses for twin mums for the first 12 months I reckon.

So... after I made the big decision the night before last to cave and give DT2 a night bottle, guess what she did last night? That's right, slept through. I bet she wants a bottle tonight again though.
(cue beyoglu thinking obsessively through yesterday's routine to try and figure out what made DT2 not need the night bottle...)

hey all

there - such great news that your boys are doing so well!!

haha red re the MIL. i have an interesting mental image of you tandem feeding two 18 yr olds.

dp is being MUCH better, think the penny may have finally dropped!!! (not sure how long it will last though....)

ohh all this talk of routines worries me slighty.....we do a bedtime routine but to be honest, during the day i just sort of stumble through as best i can! no schedule for feeds or naps....just happy when they seem happy....maybe i should look into this.....

ps beyog - hope tonight goes as well as last! i can only dream of such a night.....(well can't even dream cos don't sleep....

Nancy when the girls were little I used to wake in the night after some 50 minute long space between one and the other needing fed and I'd be so glad that I could remember dreaming about something because it meant I must have been asleep! One nice thing about twins though is that once it gets better it gets better twice as fast, if you see what I mean...

Hello there great news about bringing babies home, can't imagine what a relief it must be!! well done

nancy great to hear dh has finally come on board, I got a nice lie in on Sunday and a looong shower too. Felt like a different person!

red good luck with inlaws, bet you're counting the days... and great answer!

beyoglu it sounds like you are doing great with the night feeds.

nancy we didn't do routines much, still don't except a bedtime routine, I wouldn't worry about it as yet, but as they stay awake more make sure they learn to self settle as it's easier at this stage. Cheeky dtg used to be the easy one, fall asleep in her bouncy chair, suck her thumb etc, and now the little muppet will only go to asleep if I feed her, which means no one ever manages to settle her, and she struggles to go to sleep in the puschaitr and car too..she's a little cute nightmare!

ONe thing I think I would do form now though is to try and feed them together, I couldn't, but I think that helps keep them on the same schedule at least!

Glad the return to work is going well mines, I feel like I could do with a little parttime job now not too demanding though as I am not quite with it yet the holy grail...

now I have a question for the breastfeeding mothers, how/when are you planning, if you are, to stop? I am thinking of continuing til 12 months, but trying to figure out how to do it (dd1&2 both selfweaned), especially with dtg who doesn't go to asleep in any other way... I thought one starting point would be to stop the daytime feeds, but when? at the moment I am still offering about twice a day, on top of morning and bedtime, plus 1-2 during th night. any words of wisdom there?

oops lots of crying here...

Hi all. At last can get on here and update. No internet or reception in hospital. I at last I brought dt1 home from hospital last night after three admissions in 4 weeks, the last stay being for 11 days. Bronchialitis is bloody horrible! And then on Saturday dt2 was admitted and is still there. For 4 days we had both dts in! ! Never thought I would be in that situation!! dt2 on O2 and tube fed but making real progress. Hope to have him home in a couple of days.

So all in all a bloody nightmare! But friends came out in force when the shit really hit the fan and parents have been here to have dd, who I have missed sooo much.

Thanks for all your kind words. I never really contribute anything other than moans and drama to this group so may have to bow out. I do read but never get round to actually replying or acknowledging any of you. Sorry.

Oh bloody hell bigboobs, what a total nightmare. Your poor babies and poor you. Thank goodness everyone has rallied round, I hope your best friend has too. Really hope your boys are better soon. Don't bow out, you'd be missed. My posts are always whinges anyway, and with less to whinge about than you.

Puts it into perspective, we've been worried enough with all three really chesty, temperatures of 39.3, 39 and 38.7 all round but this morning they seem to be improving.

Claire, I'd not really thought about stopping, I'm aiming for similar to DD at least and i fed her til 15 months. She quite naturally dropped day feeds at 9 months I think, so just did morning, night and any wake ups from then on. Hmm. I guess I'd stop daytime first, and offer a beaker of milk or snack instead?? But no way would I stop if it gets them back to sleep in the night first!! I feed mine 3-4 times in the day and depending on the baby, 1-3 or 2-4 times a night. Argh!

Bigboobs Glad to hear it's getting better - sounds like you've had it really rough. We had a small relapse with one back in again last week too, but nowehere near that bad - it must just be going round again. Sodding bugs!
all round.

ah boobs, sounds like you've had a horrendous time. glad that friends etc ended up rallying round!

hope yours are feeling better too dream and twelve

thanks for reassurance re routine claire! i do often feed them at the same time - have got 'my brestfriend twins breastfeeding pillow - a hideous contraption that i am starting to despise but i couldn't do it without that. How do you manage not feeding them together?? what do you do when they both want feeding at the same time? I also find that the only way i can calm them when they're both crying is to stick them on the pillow with me and they'll usually drop off.

what do the rest of you do to calm them when they both cry at the same time? any adivce greatly appreciated! i imagine when they're older and a bit more interested by what's going on around them, it's a bit easier to distract them? i hope!!

another question re breastfeeding - dtb seems to be hungrier than dtg and if i am ever feeding him on his own, when he has finished on one boob i never know whether to put him on the second (if i do, he always takes it) because i am aware that his sister will want to feed more or less straight after and i don't want there to be nothing left for her. what do those of you who breastfeed do about this? is the boob actually 'empty' or does the milk come in immediately when they start sucking? someone told me it takes 45 mins for milk to come back in, don't know where they got that from though.

they slept from 9pm to 4am last night! i can't believe it!!!! think it must have been a fluke but i feel like a new woman!! well i feel less like a zombie......

bigboobs don't bow out, we're here for you no matter! And bloody hell we're all a bunch of whingers. Glad the DTS are on the mend. Sorry to hear yours had a relapse twelve. Illness should definitely be banned in the first year at least.

I've met two nannies, one that I liked a lot and one who terrified me. So we'll be asking the first robe back. Still feel v odd about hiring help, but I reckon seeing as I've done the first 8 months on my own with all 3 a deserve a bit of a break! Even tho I'll be working so not technically a break...

Have any of you lot been reading the coffee/clumsy twin party debacle threads?

bigboobs don't bow out! My goodness with all that you've got going on... if we can give a listening ear, that's great...

Nancy when mine were teeny and they cried I put them in our Weego twin carrier and walked around with them, or put them in the pram and went out and walked with them. With us it was always always about sleep, they needed to sleep and couldn't. I'd recommend harvey Karp's book, Baby Bliss, for ways of calming very small babies - having said that he recommends swaddling and while it was magic for our girls in the first months it was a bugger to break them of the habit at 5 and a bit months when they started rolling.

rednellie what debacle? Is mumsnet having a meltdown and I'm missing it???

We're having a meltdown.. Both babies up, dh not home and dd2 in tears because I lost it with her

Feeling so baaad

And both babies waking loads (as in even more than usual) for past two nights

I want to join in the crying too

And breath Claire bloody babies refusing to go to bed gets me stressed so quickly as you're always knackered with minimal reserves of patience by that time of day I find. It's not so bad. They'll sleep. Hopefully for a much, much longer time than last night too.

Mine still bunged up and up constantly and after working for months on self settling and sleeping in their cots, I'd finally cracked it, and now he's ill I cannot get DT1 to sleep in his cot after midnight again . Even though he's much better now.

Yy rednellie but I'm not up to date currently, did coffee come back? What's the news?!

Nancy, I used to carry one in a sling, one in arms, feed.them, or push in buggy as it was sometimes sleep for me too. At 10 weeks I discovered white noise worked for colicky crying, like a miracle. A cd I bought from Amazon, baby sense Womb to World changed my life :) Still key to mine self settling, I heart my white noise cd

It's much better now though, mine cried so, so much at first. For months, but twas dairy as the culprit for the one who didn't settle down. Improved for the other from 3 or 4 months.

Oh claire I hope it all resolved itself!

Well here I am having "offered" to do the dreamfeed so OH can have a full night's sleep for once, ahahahaha. Cos yeah, I'm totally getting aaaaall the sleep in this house... Five nights a week he's off duty after the dreamfeed at 11, till he gets up for work at 6 or usually 7. That's ages! But he faffs about after the dreamfeed getting ready for bed (and keeping me awake - I go in at half 9 and then we do shift change after the dreamfeed so I take out my earplugs and put my watch back on for CC timing, although they've been sleeping through the past couple of nights) so it's like almost 12 before he gets to bed. See me though, I am so organised. I've got jammies on, bottles ready to go, dishwasher on, I've cleaned my teeth - all I need is some small people to make hungry noises (and if they don't soon I'm going in anyway).

red I looked for those threads but looks like they've been deleted. Boo, I missed the drahma! I won't ask what it was about in case we get shut down here as well.

Hi all. Think I need lessons on how to use mumsnet properly, this thread had disappeared from 'my active' threads yet again, I came on to give the thread a bump and saw you've all been busy posting away!

Hello Nancy and thereis, and any other newbies I've missed. Are you both in France or am I getting mixed up?

Well it was their first birthday last week, can't believe it! It goes so quickly. And I've been back at work for 7 weeks now, it is flying by, I'm on Xmas countdown already. mines how are you finding work/life balance?

I give them morning bottle, get myself dressed with two munchkins crawling all over my bedroom, do some laundry, leave at 8am when nanny arrives, get home about get home for 7pm straight to bedtime routine, then after cooking, laundry and a few work emails its time for bed before I know it. What a life eh? And DH doesn't seem to have noticed that I am back at work, still doing absolutely no childcare, cooking or housework during the week (tbd hes out at work 7am to 8pm) then moans when I want him to take over in Saturday mornings.

red did you find a nanny? I have a contact of someone who nannies for another lical twin mum part time recently so I can give you her details if you haven't decided yet? And festivals sounds like a very glamourous business compared to my boring job!

bigboobs I hope your little one is getting better

twelve, dream, beyoglu and anyone else I'v missed, hello there

Hello claire too! I stopped feeding at 10.5months, they didn't seem to care but I was in tears when I gave them their morning feed from a bottle! I gradually replaced each daytime feed with bottles/snacjs from about 6 mo onwards so was just feeding 1-2 a day when I stopped

Hello ceevee was wondering where you were

Babies driving me crackers. Coughing their guts up but i don't care, I'm just desperate for some sleep!!!! Go to sleep you two, and stay asleep DD...

Right, answers to questions.

Claire -I'm not planning on stopping feeding. Bf DD till she was 21 months and tbh after 12 months it was so little (say 2 feeds a day) and quick it never really interfered with me doing anything.

ope you're all feeling better. Nights like that suck. Dinnertime is our difficult time - similarly shouted at DD and make her cry.

Nancy - the best way I found to make sure each twin got enough and fully drained each breast/got right balance of fore and hind milk was if I swapped sides every 24 hrs. So say DT1 would feed fromt.ge left side all day until swap over wt bedtime. Made life a lot easier!

Right going to post before I lose this.

ceevee I've found a nice one but if there's any issues I'll def let you know. I think your DH might need reminding about equal leisure time concept

Coming off the boob, hmm...
I think DD started being a boob refuser shortly after 5 months by herself actually. We took ages to get them off shields, and because their milk kept changing they kept having different bottles/teats as well (from tiny hospital ones, then NUK ones, then Tomme Tippee fast flow) so I think the poor mite was completely confused and was just like "GIVE ME A BOTTLE AND STOP FAFFING ABOUT, DAMN YOU"!
Ds I didn't take off the shields ever, and we kept going to 7 months, but by stopping bf one of them I guess my supply had come down - not that it was ever that great - and we just gradually increased the amount of bottle-only feeds he had, until we were down to just one bedtime feed. The last time I did that I made sure we were going straight out to dinner with friends so I could drink wine and have fun and not feel too maudlin!
I think I was more upset about the thought of stopping than actually stopping in the end, and weirdly about 2 weeks later I couldn't picture myself doing it at all, it was like my body had forgotten how. Do still miss it sometimes though.

I am officially waayyy behind here now! It's all to do with that work/life balance thing which is great but something had to give lately it's been internet time (huff).

Anyway quick replies to those I can remember and sorry to those I don't lots of skimming has happened.

red have you found a nanny yet? Why did the second one scare you?!? Also what thread? I wish I could read that!

nancy when the dts were tiny I would sing silly songs etc but yes it is definately much better when they are older they rarely cry at the same time now as too busy but I find dt1 sets off dt2 sometimes so as long as I calm dt1 he is ok! Also you tend to know why they are crying so the problem can be sorted quicker. (I know that seems impossible now!) Glad your dp is helping more take no prisoners when it comes to getting you time!

beyou do you find cc at night so much harder than the day? I don't know why but I give in much much quicker at night-the crying seems louder I think!

claire hope you are ok if it's any help my dts are not sleeping well very much at all at the moment. Maybe it is as beyou said and it's a 9 month thing but was it spartacus who said hers calmed down again?

ceevee are you working full time? bloody hell you are superwoman!!! (I think red may be too tbh...). How is your dh's cousin?
I'm only working 20 hours but 2 days a week is this:
6am we get up dh does nappies and dresses dts whilst I get ready (he gets ready much quicker than me!). 6.30 dh goes to work me and dts have breakfast and bottle (they have bottle I have coffee-strong). Then I clear away quick tidy whilst they play and produce a foul nappy for me. 7.20 coats shoes on leave at 7.30 I drop them at mil or mum on the way to work. Either I pick them up or dh. Dh does bedtime alone 2 evenings a week (trooper) and Friday pm's when I work. We still mange to walk the dog, do washing ironing food shopping etc I love being part time! By the way the 6am starts are a bit awry at the mo as dts have decided 5 can be the new 6, and 2am the new playtime....

Only news this end is dt1 is cruising round the furniture now. On Wednesdays he had 3 big bumps and at one point his mouth was bleeding but couldn't see where it was coming from. He keeps getting back up and trying again though daft sod and even let go a few times . dt2 is happy at floor level-he's seen what happens when you go higher than that....

Oosh I am out tonight! Got a babysitter and everything! Was looking forward to sleep but thinking a night out will be good as it has been several months now! Last time was an epic fail but am determined to try and enjoy it.

Wonder when I will be back here again? Sending hugs and sleep to you all.

bigboobs do not bow out we 're all a bunch of moaners feel like I'm the worst, this is what this thread is about innit? give us some space to share tips about life with twins and moan away without getting on OH's nerves, right? , and blimey you have enough reasons to moan for all of us, do come back and I hope you have both your babies home now.

How was your night out minespaint? I haven't been out in like a million years and don't see it happening anytime soon.

we're right behind you with the physical development, dtb has now started pulling himself up in the cot or playpen and standing one handed then getting very excited and bumping his head! dtg does this funny rollingsittingrolling kind of crawl that gets through the room, but not every efficiently

I really do not know what to do about bfeeding, dtg IS NOT having anything to do with bottles... still only falls asleep on the boob. I'd need to sort her going to sleep first anyway and see if she took a cup... but I am always sooo tired that I do not have the energy to even make a plan... we're going through massive colds here (joining you dream) and they are NOT sleeping, last two nights dh spent on sofa with one twin and me in bed with the other, groan. Am very of those babies just going straight to bottle with no fuss, to think that she was refusing the boob for a good 4 days after she was born!
mines I do not know what sleep regressions here, they've never really progressed anyway

ceeveebee hats off to you, how do you do it? I would love a little part time job, but there's about as much chance of finding one as of my dts sleeping through...
ps put the thread on your thread's I'mwatching list so you do not lose it again [I spend too much time on here emoticon]

oh well better do some housework before they get fed up of their playpen.

good day all!

hi all!
god you get really behind on the thread if you dont come on for a few days!

ceevee you sound v well organised! yes, there and I both are in france (randomly!) but not in the same region (shame, the dts could have been friends!)

red thanks for bf advice - i have been doing that since fri now. on a different thread in the bf section, some twin mums said they had a permanently allocated boob per twin and that the twin's boob produced the amount of milk they were asking for.

hope you had a good night out mines!

thanks for all the tips for dealing with two cryers! will be v useful i think! they are starting to become more interested in their surroundings which is really great and seem to be starting to understand that they can be awake and not feed!

however they don't acknowledge each other's existance at all! they only time is interact is when they are lying on the changing mat together and bedtime and dtg tries to feed off dtb's head (well, it is boob shaped....)

when did people's dts start to interact with each other?

arg gotta go...

I've got a picture of