The under/over/around 1 Twins thread for support, tips on how to survive and enjoy twin parenthood!

[DreamingOfPeace]

BB3: dcda non id girls Sept 2011 (plus ds)
TwelveLeggedWalk: DCDA DD and DS 14.09.11 (PFBs)
Tiggersreturn twin boys (?!) (plus ds age 5)
Wherearemyearplugs twins (plus ds)
Ceeveebee b/g twins 21.11.11, PFBs
minesapintofwine: non-id boys 02/02/2012. dcs 1&2/pfb on good days.
ClaireMarathonFeeder: Boy/girl twins born 08/02/2012, no3&4, dd1 (2001) and dd2 (2004)
rednellie nonID boys 13.03.2012 + DD 03.02.10
Lemele: id boys (plus ds)
Skitoo : DCDA Non ID Boys, 01.04.12 DC 1&2
DreamingofPeace: dcda non id boys, 4.4.12 DC 2&3 (DD Sept 2010)
beyoglu: dcda non id girls 21.4.12
Bigboobsatlast ID twin boys 30.04.12 DC #2&3 (DD Feb 2010)
Scollister mcda girls 3.5.12 plus DD age 4
Twin2makes4 mcda girls plus 2 ds,age 8 & 4

Again, sorry for mistakes, doing this from my phone!

Settle in ladies :)

[gardenpixie32]

Hope all the new twin mummies and babies are doing well.

We started weaning the girls 3 weeks ago and it is going well. They seem to be enjoying it and they have tried a variety of different things now. We are doing purees with a lot of finger foods. I am also most impressed with their sippy cup ability, I could enter them in the sippy cup olympics!

DP and I are talking about me not returning to work! I am so pleased about this. I love spending time with the girls and don't really want to share my time with other children (ex teacher and now a childminder). Money will be tight but I would rather go without things and give 100% of my time to the babies. They will be 27 weeks old on Saturday and they are so much more interactive with us and each other, which is just lovely!

How is it going Mandas, Digestives, Free, Look and Lamele. Mandas, I will reply to your email soon!

[LookAtHerGo]

Hello everyone.

Thought I would pop in here, I find it difficult to keep up with MN threads, so excuse me if I am an infrequent visitor please.

I have twin boys - they are 11 weeks old now, after deciding to show up when I was 35+1, weighing 5lb13 and 5lb15, a 10 day stay in transitional care due to getting temp sorted and some jaundice, but they came out big bouncing boys really. They are doing really really well, although I've not managed to get BF sorted, they had all sorts of problems with latching and stuff (very long story), I am expressing, and they probably get about half EBM and half Formula, but it's becoming more formula as time goes on as I have dropped a few expressing sessions. Took me a while to get my head around not feeding them myself, but trying and 'failing' at each feed was horrible, I was upset, they were hungry and fractious because they couldn't latch or when they did they came off again too soon. Anyway, long story short and we are sorted now with bottles. I do wonder at times if there is anything I did wrong, but I tried my hardest to get it going, and it just didn't work.

I also have an 18month old daughter - yep, I know! They boys arrived on the same day she turned 16months! It's a bit chaotic at times, and there are days when I get to 6:30 and she's gone to bed and I take a big breath and wonder if that's the first one I've done all day! But we get through the days, I get out and about and make it to appointments and can even make a casserole during the day, so it can't be all that mad (I'm laughing at me saying that)!

It's hard work at times and I'd love more sleep, but my daughter is very comical (and chatty and climbey and into everything) and the boys have recently started smiling and well, it's lovely, and I'm enjoying it.

[mandasand]

Wow, we've not really had a hint of any smiles from our two yet and they are 6 weeks on Weds next week. I felt a bit bad when NCT friend came over and told me about all the activities she does with her 8-week old singleton during the day - baby gym time, looking at the windows time, etc. Once one is calm post-feed I put the baby down and move onto the other one. And if they are both calm they go into the cot and I try to get on with other stuff (increasing piles of washing, keeping house tidy-ish, email, etc). I now worry that I am not giving them enough 'face time'. I also use dummies liberally to help with grizzles. Cue lots of worries about hindering their social development. Yikes.

I had my first full week caring for babies alone last week as DH went back to work. By Friday afternoon I was speaking with nannies arranging appointments for a few hours' help per week! Am I being a total wuss?

The routine DH and I are working with at the mo is that he gets home after 11 hrs out of the house at 6.45pm. We eat / feed the babies / have a bit of time together, I sleep 9pm till 2am uninterrupted then am on night shift (during which I can get a couple of hours of sleep in around the feed. He gets to sleep 2am till 7am and then gets up for work. I think I get more sleep than my husb as he finds it hard to sleep before 2am, and I think I get more sleep than other mummies here, but still I found the week exhausting and a bit demoralizing.

There is just about enough time to have a shower and/or get dressed, eat (on the hop, always), keep on top of washing/tumbling, do online food shop etc. I didn't leave the house once last week - there wasn't time especially as I can only do it straight after a feed as there is always stuff to do. I did have friends over for coffee though, and MW etc. But I felt a bit down about it. I can cope with it all, just, but it wasn't particularly fun and since the D&C week before last I seem to have got my brain back and am eager to get some reading / writing done and follow up on a couple of projects I'm working on. The difficult thing is that I don't know when their deep sleep times will be, so I can't plan anything, and often I'm so frazzled then that I can't focus and switch my brain on at will.

Thus structured nanny time as a solution. I thought it would be a bit easier or more predictable. But I guess it's still early days?

[FreeButtonBee]

Don't worry! They woke every hour last night and DTS refuses to settle this evening and gas been in the boob for HOURS.

I do find it v hard to settle them - once they are propwrly asleep they do stay asleep (mostly) but getting him over is so difficult.

[DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep]

Urgh. I am trying not to be jealous of those with sleeping babies unsuccessfully

I'm too tired to post properly, but yay for sleeping babies, coping well by yourself and everything that's going well.

I'm off to bed. Nearly 1 and i am.lucky to get 2 hours sleep in a row :(

[gardenpixie32]

Smiles are the best and make it all worthwhile. We are starting to get belly aching laughs occasionally and they are great!

My mum stayed with us until the girls were 8 weeks old (mainly because I needed someone to help DP out while I was in hospital having surgery). Then DP took a weeks paternity leave when I came out of hospital and my mum left. I have been on my own with the girls since then. At first it seemed scary but you soon get into a routine and now, to be honest, I prefer it when DP is at work. I get much more done!

Sounds like you are doing very well Free. I am impressed with your BF!

[FreeButtonBee]

They are 6 weeks. I had one other night when DTS slept 5 hours but not a night when both have slept. DTD cluster fed like mad last night and then fell into an exhausted coma. Was fully expecting a terrible night. Apart from a brief stir at 3 when I put Ewan the Dream Sheep on, they slept til 4. Downside was they fed until 6 and didn't really settle properly again but I felt so good after my long snooze, that I didn't mind.

I daren't hope for another night like that but it hopefully means that gradually they will go a bit longer - which is all I want. Not expecting miracles just yet.
I was a bit sceptical that things would improve after 6 weeks but it's looking to be true.


DTD is starting to smile tons now. DTS is more shy and only gives little half smiles while looking at you from the corner of his eye. Bless.

Next challenge is two weeks without help during the day. DH is back at work and family help is petering out. I'm actually looking forward to just being on my own and working out their rhythms a bit more without a mother or MIL hovering over my shoulder. The easter bank hol in the middle will break it up. Biggest worry is getting them to nap together at least once a day. That's been tricy so far (although they are doing it right now!)

[gardenpixie32]

Brilliant news free! How old are your babies now? It will get better and better. By 15 weeks we were getting 8/10 hours solid sleep.

Well done Button Babies!

[FreeButtonBee]

5 HOURS UNINTERRUPTED SLEEP LAST NIGHT!!!!!

God, I feel amazing. It'll probably never happen again but fuck, I feel brilliant.

[gardenpixie32]

Hi manda lovely to hear from you.

It seems you have had a bad time health wise, similar to me, I was in A&E twice and had my gall bladder removed all by the time the girls were 6 weeks old! I hope you are on the mend now and well done for coping so well with it all. It is a difficult time and being unwell makes it even harder.

Tandem bottle feeding...I will email you a photo of how I used to feed my girls when they were little. I do it differently now that they are bigger. Message me and I will send you the pic.

The stomach muscle thing just sounds horrid, no advice, sorry!

Glad to hear you are in a good routine. If I had read the horror stories of lack of sleep with twins I would have been petrified while I was pregnant. Luckily, my girls are great sleepers and this isn't a major problem for us either.

My girls are 6 months old next week! I cannot believe it! I am also broody and mental it seems

[mandasand]

Hey everyone! Seems ages since I've posted. Twins are 5 weeks today and chunky little monkeys. Both over 8lbs now. Compared with others I don't think they are bad at the whole sleeping thing, probably because they got into a reasonable feed/sleep routine before we left hospital. Trying to maintain that, but it's often thrown out when we have house guests wanting to prod and dandle them when they should be sleeping. That said, they have been more grizzly over the past week. Both v. snuffly and DTD (does this mean darling twin daughter?) producing pea-green snots. MW signed them off today and thinks DTS (darling twin son?!) has oral thrush, which could explain his grizzliness.

Anyway, I was back in hospital last week for a D&C for retained placenta - boo! Still bleeding, still crampy, and nervous about coming off antibiotics as when I did last time that's when I started to bleed and clot really heavily, resulting in being whisked off to hospital in rather dramatic fashion early one morning. FX for me!

Any advice on tandem feeding with formula? (Gave up expressing / stimulating paltry milk supply.) I have tried propping them up in a big sausage cushion turned into a circle, but I suspect there ends up being more milk in the muslins that in the babies! I wonder if 5 weeks is too early to try this trick? Maybe it's too early anyhow - when I break to wind one, the other either cries or falls asleep, etc and we all get out of sync.

Also would love advice / others' experience with having lost stomach muscles. They were about 6-8 inches apart post-birth and the inner workings of my intestines were magnificently on display! Thankfully, I'm now at about 4-5 inches and my intestines are more hidden away. Got a tubigrip and am trying to 'hold in' belly a lot, on advice of hospital physio. And got a physio who is also pilates teacher coming over for 1:1 session tomorrow (terrified both babies will be screaming at once - yikes!) Sorry for big, me-me-me post!

[Lemele]

Oh and mine are one in just over a week!

nearly a year of practically no sleep, no wonder I'm a walking zombie

[Lemele]

It is a rare night when we don't have both in our bed by 3am latest.

Hopefully cracking down on that now but hard to tell as DT2 has been too poorly - last night he was more or less up from 10pm-4am, we both drifted during this time but he just kept crying constantly - it felt like about every 10 minutes (and woke up DT1 and DS1 as a consequence - in fact poor DT1 fell out of the bed because stupid DH left him asleep (or so he thought) in bed with no cushions while going to see DS1). In an act of desperation I took DT2 downstairs and put Night Garden on to calm him down, then after 10 mins or so put him in the pushchair where he fell asleep within a few mins, moaned in his sleep for about half an hour and then the two of us (me on the sofa) got about 2 hours from 5-7am of actual sleep. Joy.

[FreeButtonBee]

I am coming it of the 4-6 week growth spurt/cluster feeding. No longer having. 6 hour marathon feeds every night thank The Lord! Not getting masses of sleep as they tag team waking over night but normally get a 3 hour block at some point, which is enough to manage when you add in the odd half hour here and there.

DTD is still v windy and gets quite fractious during the day but infacol is helping a bit. Starting to see a few wee smiles though which helps! DTS, having started out as a worry, is now a pleasure - placid, chilled, sleeps for 5 hours some nights!!! It feels easier than 2 weeks ago but still relentless as they rarely settle at the same time during the day. Also feeds do still take quite some time - roll on 10 min feeds...

Am back driving now too which helps and managed to get pram and babies in and out fairly efficiently.

[DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep]

Oh, and DT1 is often sleeping in our bed, out of sheer desperation. Gah.

[DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep]

Well, my night last night went DT2 down at 6:40 (self settled), DT1 down at 6:50 (fed then cuddled til v calm, put in.cot and jiggled to sleep), DD down 7:35, then DT1 up 8:30, 10:30, 1, 2, 4 and 5:20 for the day. DT2 had one feed at 3am and self settled in his cot again til morning (7:15).

I am missing evenings. I am really missing decent blocks of sleep. They're 11 months 3 weeks!!!!! FFS.

How's everyone else getting on?

[Lemele]

That's very interesting dream. I guess relates to my sleep training having no effect because it's obviously not what the twins need even though it worked fab for DS1.

I'd like to think that my slightly harsher treatment of late is helping but they've been ill so I can't tell. Boo hiss. I do feel I've been up a tad less though. (fingers crossed...)

[DreamingOfAFullNightsSleep]

Not much time but digestives, I tried and tried but cannot get my non id boys doing the same thing. They are so different and need different amounts of awake time/nap time. It is not just you!!

Hi lemele, very long time no see! I'm going with nature over nurture as my twin 1 Dora not sleep. Still. Up 2-3 hourly, often up for an hour or so in the Night. Terrible. Whereas twin 2 wakes once for a feed then settles back down in his cot. Both treated exactly the same. Yawn.

Sorry to be so brief, but welcome to digestives and free. And though mine are still really hard work its still miles better than the early weeks and months. Stay strong!

[Lemele]

Hi everyone, long time no chat. DH got me a fancy pants phone for mothers day (and before you say anything it was definitely as much for him as for me lol) so there's a vague chance I might be able to come on here more than once in a blue moon! So hi, how have you all been these last 6 months or however long it's been?!

My two are nearly one (end of this month) and are gorgeous but still absolute terrors at night. I'm on deaths door struggling and with advice from a nurse and my mum am trying to take over the situation (by basically only allowing short naps and no sleep after 3/3:30pm, as well as some other things like stuffing them with porridge before bed etc) basically because all of my other marvellous sleep training is doing sod all!

How is everyone else who was struggling with this a few months ago? dream? Anyone else? All sleeping through now I have no doubt... ;)

[FreeButtonBee]

Thanks Digestive. She seems a lot better today for no particular reason although I have been keeping her upright for 20 mins after a feed which seems to help. She went down at 12.30 and is fast asleep.

DTS however has grabbed the baton and despite a big FF at 12 is currently attached to my boob. Sigh. Do I have the only baby that needs a BF top up after a FF ?! This doesn't make life much easier!!

I did at least get 2 hours kip on the sofa this evening so don't feel too much like death just yet. Also my brother is coming to visit on thursday for a few days - just as DH goes back to work - which is a relief. Some daytime company and a willing helper. I am more relieved than l thought I wd be.

I can't wait for a smile too - am starting to need some sort of feedback in order to make this seem worthwhile! They are cute and about60% of the cuddling time is awesome but when they both start crying at the same time for the 20th time, some actual interaction wd be appreciated!

[DigestivesWithCheese]

Free - have you tried colief for the wind? It's helped a lot for us. It is £12 for a TINY bottle but if it works then you can ask for it on prescription. We get 6 bottles on each prescription because then we have enough for about 3 weeks at a time. We put it in the bottles but you can use it when breastfeeding too. It has stopped the screaming after feeds but they are still both grunting and groaning for most of the night, so I can't help on that one. I have been picking them up when they groan loudly but maybe I will stop that now.

Hi everyone else! Please can i join you? I have finally wandered over here from the twins club thread. My DT's (boy/girl) are 9 weeks old and I also have a 7 year and almost 2 year old. I felt relatively okay for about the first month but now the initial adrenalin has worn off and I am now running out of steam and pretty fed up .

The routines I used with my other DC just don't seem to work on the twins. They take it turns to have a long stretch at night, so the night that one manages to go through from 10pm until after 2am, the other one will wake at 1am and vice-versa. NEVER on the same night. Why??! It seems impossible to keep them in sync and all I do is feed, wind and change. DH does the late feeds during the week and one night of night feeds at the weekend. We are both exhausted, struggling to spend time with our other DC and the end doesn't seem to be in sight...

The twins were four weeks early which might explain the fact that neither of them have smiled at us yet. A few smiles would really go a long way at this point

Anyway, sorry for the moan, hopefully I will be feeling a bit more positive next time I post

[gardenpixie32]

I would leave them until they cried, which wasn't often. They would eventually settle.

Free it is so hard in the first few weeks. I feel your pain!

[FreeButtonBee]

Oh god, WHY won't they sleep at the same time!?!? Managed to get DTS down in record time at 12.30ish with white noise. Now DTD won't come off the boob at all. Gah!

With grunting babies, do you just leave them til they cry or try to help them get comfy? She is still v windy (nappies are fine, yellow BF poos, small but certainly at least 2 a day). Imfacol helps a bit and winding throughout feeds but it's v hard when tandem feeding and she is still grunting and waking herself up lots.

[rednellie]

Maybe it's harder to come through as you've already fed the babies? I know I only ever had luck expressing if I either got the babies to start me up (as it were) or if I expressed rather than fed them. Please don't judge your supply on what you can express as it in no way represents how much the babies can get out.

Anyway, we're all cheering you on. It does get better!

[gardenpixie32]

mandas you can buy Infacol in the supermarket or in the pharmacy.

Personally, and I think a lot of people would disagree with me, I feel they can be overstimulated. Picking them up constantly and cuddling them for hours on end is not what we did. Ours were in incubators for the first week of their lives so were not used to constant picking up etc. Babies need to eat and sleep. Obviously cuddles are important and our girls get plenty of them but picking up a small baby whenever it squeaks is not something we did. Our girls don't like to be cuddled to sleep. We have lots of cuddles in the day and before bedtime, which they love, they snuggle into us and DT1 sucks on my clothes but when they have had enough, they whinge and don't stop until they are put into their cots. We have never done controlled crying with our babies.

I remember posting on the Twins Ante Natal thread a few weeks after mine were born and saying they make so much noise when asleep or trying to sleep. It is quite normal for very small babies to be noisy. Ours became much quieter when asleep around 12-14 weeks. Try introducing a comforter. DT1 uses a muslin and likes to rub her face against it, DT2 has taken to thumb sucking to comfort herself.

You will find what works for you and your babies and you will soon be a pro. DP is constantly amazed that I know their different cries. Soon you will be able to tell when they are windy, needing a poo, tired or hungry and it will become second nature.