Separation from high earner - how to live off this amount per month?

[Pinkpanther23]

Husband leaving and have 7 month and 7 year old - there’s been DV and finances are terrible.

Rent is £950 which for the house is amazing value, there’s nothing else locally that would keep eldest in same school that comes close. Think £100 less for a 2 bed apartment.

Ex has agreed to give £1k per month as is a high earner, this seems reasonable but I am worried about depending on this but he is a covert narc and cares a lot about his image and wouldn’t want me telling the village I’m destitute.

But it feels like I will be. Despite this higher cms with UC it’s only £2400 at the end. Im doing minimum wage remote work currently for like £200 a month and that may stop soon.

Have limited childcare here too and increasing my hours would mean a nursery and they’re literally all booked up until Jan. Contacted all local childminders too.

I’ve read on a forum that someone managed just fine on £2400 with 2 kids and fairly high rent but I can’t seem to run the numbers and cut any more.

I need to run a car due to location, and have accounted for £100 a month for MOT and repairs etc, also oil costs have sky rocketed so have factored in £130 a month for that

do I try to get more work somehow?

I feel so low

I can’t imagine being so bitter that you’d leave a comment like that on a post from a woman trying to leave a domestic abuse situation with a young baby.

I want nothing more than to work more and feel like myself again. But right now, I don’t have access to suitable childcare that would make that possible.

When I’m not caring for my baby (the same things people pay nurseries or childminders to provide) I’m job searching, navigating a separation or trying to stave off panic attacks.

Many women in situations like this feel suicidal. I lost my life savings too.

I’m grateful that I’m not suicidal, but if I was, comments that shame or judge someone in a vulnerable moment could do real harm.

I genuinely wish you well, because a response like this usually comes from a place that isn’t very happy.

...and feel the degradation of going to the job centre. Utterly bleak place.

Good this got deleted. Some people are just rotten.

I always say that you only have to look at articles/threads about benefits/singlemums if you want the answer to "why doesn't she just leave?"

Wow! Why so harsh.
She has a BABY!!
I don't think the OP comes across as somebody who doesn't want to work more, I don't understand why people infer this from her post.

Truthfully no it’s not going to be easy. Especially as your ex is likely to be inconsistent with his maintenance.

Make sure you claim council tax support as well as the single person discount on council tax. You claim this separately to UC.

Claim DHP from the local council housing benefit towards to unmet housing costs. However I suspect because of the maintenance they may not award it.

The positive news is you are doing a budget and trying to factor in a reserve fund. It’s going to be hard seeing him do the fun expensive stuff with the children when you can’t. Don’t try and compete. Children soon see who is consistent and present for them.

In time work can increase. As your wages are under the work allowance you won’t have those deducted but must still declare them.

It’ll be tough going from having disposable income to watching closely but it’s achievable.

Ok so start by booking the nursery for Jan when they have space, otherwise the baby will get older and older and you'll still have the same problem. By jan baby will be 15 months, most babies are in nursery from 10-12 months so this isn't unreasonable.

Treat the next 8 months as temporary, pare back any costs you can, sell anything you can, and just focus on getting through to a point where you can get a full time job. That's the best way to improve your finances.