How will I manage as an older single person once kids have left

[Dogmam9273]

I'm currently married with two teens. Wanting to separate but have felt trapped financially and with the kids as I couldn't have provided for them if i was single as I earn minimum wage, husband a high earner.
Very soon I will file for divorce, won't get any money out of it as we have hardly any savings but i will be able to buy a small apartment /house outright so will be mortgage free.
I work full time on minimum wage, can't see this ever changing, if anything i need to work less. I have chronic painful conditions , depression and anxiety (although that may go away once apart from husband) I have 2 elderly parents that I will be caring for as I'm an only child.
I know I can claim UC whilst children are with me /in education but what about when they are adults?
My income is £1500 which won't cover my outgoings or enable me to live any kind of life that I desperately crave. I feel so trapped and can't see a way out of my situation.
How do older single people manage financially? Especially if they have health conditions?

Surely if you have no rent or mortgage £1500 will be plenty!

That's more that a lot of people have.

I take home only a little bit more than you, and I’m a lone parent, have a big mortgage, still paying off student loan, have no other income, have a disability and two teens to support / pay for.

And I manage.

You’re crazy if you think you can’t live alone comfortably on that income with no mortgage & no dependents!

I have owned my house for about 20 years and brought up two children by myself with an income of around £1200 per year. We didn't have massively expensive holidays or a fancy car or lots of expensive tech or designer clothes but life was fine. The DC did all the hobbies they wanted and didn't go without. The biggest expense was food when they were older teenagers!
I live alone now and am on about £1400 per month and rarely spend all of my income every month.

You seem to be basing the £1500 on your current living situation not your future one.

I will be on similar money and as a single once the kids live away I feel like I’ll be doing pretty well (also no mortgage).

Cut your cloth as they say.

Why would someone with £1500 disposable income potentially be entitled to UC? I assume the ex would also be paying CMS and OP would get child benefit. Genuinely interested…

As pps have mentioned, you need to take proper advice, as if your h has a large pension then you may be entitled to some of that / half of that. This will significantly help the situation.

Oh ffs of course you as a single person will be able to manage on £1500 a month with no housing costs to cover......you're in a very similar situation to me, in fact I earn a bit less and have a few hundred spare each month.

There’s various things you could get in the settlement - spousal support, half his pension, some of his savings (you can’t know for sure yet if he doesn’t have any of his own)…or aren’t you bothered about this? Please go and see a solicitor asap.

Do you live in Monaco??

Honestly OP I can see why the spending of a single person might be a bit hard to pin down mentally after years of bigger liabilities but you'll be fine. What do you mean by "any kind of life?" Travel etc?
Do you help your parents financially?
You may well find you can treat your depression and anxiety more effectively outside an unhappy marriage.
If you do have to drop to less work for health reasons maybe you'll get help although I know that's complex.
Any hope of study/training to gradually earn more for the same or less time? Minimum wage work can be very difficult on the body depending what it is of course.

It sounds like you're scared and uncertain as much as anything which I totally get. could you talk to a counsellor for a few sessions before you take any steps?

How much does your husband earn? Does he have any investments? It’s quite rare for a high earner to have nothing apart from a house. Make sure you get a share of his pension too or you could agree to offset it against a larger share of the house - he will be able to get a mortgage whereas you won’t. You may be entitled to some spousal maintenance too if there’s a really big disparity and you need more income (eg if husband is on 200k and you’re on minimum wage, I’d expect a maintenance order).

Good luck with leaving him!

Mortgage free, it's manageable. Also, if you have chronic conditions, do apply for PIP. Take advice on how to fill in the forms, but if a condition affects you so much, you may qualify for it.

Are you taking the piss?
£1500 for a single person with no mortgage would be an absolute dream!
I can only guess that you live quite an extravagant lifestyle at the minute…

Why would you only get half the equity? You've sacrificed your career to enable his. Even if you don't have kids to house that should mean you get more of the equity and some of his pension.

How old are? That will be relevant to anyl asset split. If your H has a higher mortgage ability the split maybe more in your favour.

Work out a budget, after essential costs -food, council tax, utilities, car costs should allow for some spending money.

Nonsense. There is nothing to suggest that OP has sacrificed anything, and OP is working full time

It certainly seems possible, by the other comments.
I made the mistake of allowing my EX an 8 year delay on payment for the financial split and a LOT worse still I would 'benefit' from my parent's estate (inheritance) BUT uK solicitors totally bungled the inheritance issue so I lost out around 120 Thousand Pounds which duly made me suicidal and I had a minot heart attack due to the stress. The Legal Ombudsman is a very sick joke as they refused to even look at my claim against the solicitor (Hugh James of Cardiff);

You should be ok because you won't have to pay rent or mortgage. I think it'll be more the adjusting to living alone that may be a shock at first but I'm sure you'll get used to and love your peace away from ex husband x

What you are looking at is a downgrade of your lifestyle. Even your DH with his high salary if he lives alone will suddenly have no one to share expenses with. So it’s manageable but it means cutting back.

So we are mortgage free, live in a 4 bed house and spend £1700 a month (1 child and 2 adults)- it's doable and we don't have a bad lifestyle- pay for gyms, national trust membership, zoo membership, soft play membership, a car, public transport for hubby.... and we go away once or twice a year...

I am very recently retired and can live happily (but not lavishly) on less than £1,500 a month with no mortgage to pay.

The overheads are smaller on a smaller house, but obviously only one person pays for them. And you pay 75% of council tax, but it will be lower on a smaller property.

Your difficulty will come if you have no pension. Do you have a workplace pension? Your DH’s pension is a marital asset (as is yours) so if his is big you will get your share.

Living on basic state pension would make things very tight for someone living alone . Something the gvt seemingly didn’t take into account with their crudely thought out fuel allowance cut.

If you don’t qualify for basic state pension and get pension credit you could actually end up better off because it is a ‘gateway’ benefit.

If your parents need extra help get them to look at Attendance Allowance.

> enable me to live any kind of life that I desperately crave

This is your problem
You need to adjust to a life you can afford (and with £1500/month income and being mortgage free, that's pretty reasonable), not the one you 'crave'

Just about all of us crave a life beyond our means, we get over it, and get by

£1500 a month as a single person with no mortgage will be fine. But I do understand the concern of having no savings for emergencies. Could you buy a slightly cheaper property and keep some of the capital as savings (say 3 to 5k)? If not, live on £1400 and save £100 per month - it will mount up.
Finally, consider options for trying to earn a little more. Best of luck!

I've just totted it up out of interest and reckon without mortgage costs I could live as a single person really quite comfortably on £1,300 a month - would include a couple of holidays as well as eating out/savings for replacing the washing machine etc.

So £1500 will not see you starving in the hedgerows, but it sounds like it will need to be an adjustment from the higher lifestyle you currently have. Which would always be the case when going from two to one income.

Move in with your parents, OP. Live with them, work part-time, look after them, invest your divorce settlement and inherit their house down the line.

I think I've rarely come across a problem that's so easy to solve, or is so clearly not a major problem. You know that some people live on £1500pm and pay rent/ mortgage?

Ultimately, you can stay with your “high earning” husband and have the life you “desperately crave” but obviously something is leading you to want to divorce him.

What does that life look like? If you’re used to designer labels and expensive holidays then no, £1500 a month isn’t going to keep you in Gucci but only you know whether the trade off is worth it.