Debt mutual support thread number 6 ....... start the new year with a clear purpose and keep moving forwards even by tiny steps

[TalkinPeace]

This thread follows on from the last five threads in the series, the most recent of which is here.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2193736-Debt-mutual-support-thread-number-5-the-light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel-is-NOT-an-oncoming-train?

We live in a society that makes it horribly easy to get into debt but makes it incredibly hard to admit you have a problem and even harder to get out of debt.
The posters on threads, new and experienced, are here to help people get to where they want to be.

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1987219-SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important things to remember are

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers and we are here day and night )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times, including getting those closest to you to recognise the changes needed )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it
The long term results for you, your partner, your children, and your friends and family are worth it.

DH has heard back that the firm he's interviewed with are putting together a job offer for him....so near and yet so far!

Ooh, and thanks to another thread on here we heard today that we've got the Warm Home Discount thingy, which means our utility company add £140 credit to our account!

do any of you watch Sunday Brunch on C4?
PM me if you cannot work out why I'm asking

Oh what? Why? Pm me please! I don't watch it, but can Sky plus it if necessary!

Is it a 5:2 thing? Will you be on it?

I need to know why too!!! Are they having a mass kipling bake off or something?

Well tip is getting up at 5am on Sunday... This is surely more than a coincidence?

Hello all just wanted to say I'm still lurking and thinking of you all. fairy I'm so sorry things have been so hard, I was wondering (sorry if this has been asked already) if you could go to work full time and bring DH home to do childcare maybe plus some part time evening or weekend work? It might stress him out less, but it depends on whether you work already or not which I can't remember!
I am learning to drive atm, have theory test on Friday and then if I pass will book practical for 6ish weeks time, it's all so £££, then if I pass I'll be getting a banger, is anyone here a secret expert on frugal cars?! Tip?

Frugal cars .... hmm .... probably your local paper or a small independent dealer

Hope everybody has had a good evening.
Here = 1/2 bottle of fizzy between us and a simple supper - but that is cool.

tip I always watch SB (when the kids let me) will definitely watch today !

Thanks for the comments re electricity bill (will I ever not have a problem !). We've just changed banks & I should have seen it coming and lodged against it for 2 months but now have to find the cash.

I need some advice please ! Started saving an emergency fund a few months ago - locked into 7 day notice at post office - so difficult to get easily ! In 3 months I would have enough to pay off credit card (which is always maxed as I always find an excuse to use any bit of excess) and costs me 50 PM in minimum payments & 25 in interest plus over limit charges at times.

Alternative is to pay into 2 old debts I'm slowly paying off (no added interest) but are ruining my credit rating. Would be able to pay less than 20% of one.

Problem is - no emergency fund or cushion for a while if I did use it...
But I'm determined to get out of this situation ! If I pay off the CC I won't be able to get a new one because of my credit score due to the old debts. Also will have extra 50 to pay off other debts...

snowie
PAY DEBTS.

Get to where you NEVER have excess charges.
Set up a standing order for the minimum at the maxed out amount and leave it running.
eg if your limit is £2000 and the minimum is 5% then £100 per month
That way you will always be chewing away at the balance
but you can never miss a payment
and anything between the balance and the max is your "buffer" - earning you an effective interest rate of 20%
AND the card stays open as your emergency fund regardless of your rating.

Then any and every penny of spare cash goes to whumping those old debts.
Do not even think about going to the shop until you have swept every penny of spare across onto them every week.

No coffees or snacks out for a month will do you good in so many ways

Thanks Tip I will definitely pay something - choice is to pay off CC and close it or pay chunk of nastier debts (no extra charges but ongoing threat of further action at their discretion) which I am paying (about 60% of original payment agreement - they would not enter into any negotiations to restructure etc just aggressively wanted to take out a judgement etc.) so I would love to pay this down quicker. However as the CC is costing me more money probably better to close it.

I can't trust myself to use it as an emergency fund I would end up going on weekend with the kids I know I would unless I cleared it. In my defence we live so frugally at times I just feel so guilty for them !!

The sooner I get these debts cleared the better but it's a long road ahead

So I am missing Sunday Brunch due to toddler ds enjoying endless cbeebies... what have I missed? .

Hi all.
Snowie - will you feel better to write that letter closing the account? A tangible bit of progress?
I've just worked out that it will take years and years to pay off the remaining 29k we have. Unless I change the payments - then it would take a year to pay one overdraft off. I'm dragging dh to the mortgage company to talk through our options - at least then I will know.
I'm so cross I didn't pay everything (almost everything) off when I had the chance. At the time I thought replacing the leaking aged wooden lean to and installing some permanent storage was essential as it improved the value and saleability of the house. Now I'm regretting it massively. Live and learn.

Oh no nerf well look at least you have a better living environment while you pay off the debts our house needs a lot of maintenance & upgrade. I don't feel I can have anyone "new" (eg school mums etc) in the way it is but no cash to improve it.

What are we looking for on SB exactly ?!

nerf
Regret the things you have not done, rather than the things you have.

Read Fairy's posts about the stress of living in a house that needs money spending on it.
Mortgage debt is not a bad thing as you are living in the reason for its existence.

I got to be debt free at age 49. When I was 33 I was still maxed out.

Ok, I have eight years to go and a pay rise.
Snowie - no idea re:SB sorry, but I do agree with TP re paying debt off rather than having savings, especially if it's debt where you could in an emergency access what you've paid off? If that makes sense.

Am now going back to catch up several months

Nerf I am going to pay debt just not sure whether to pay CC (accruing interest) or old debt (nasty). I think CC and just close it. Anyway it's a few months away...

Snowie - I'd go for the quick win - I.e. The credit card. Then it's a whole thing you've achieved and if it's then closed you can't use it any more. Than sort yourself out a plan of attack for clearing the old loan. This is exactly what we're doing. You get a sense of achievement from completely clearing something and you have less actual things to worry about, because debt is in less places.

Thanks Jonty yes definitely doing this... As soon as enough funds saved it's gone ! Would be so nice for the first time in over 20 years not to have one .
Really there's no excuse as my debit card does everything anyway !

I'm a bit dead in the water. Anxiety has subsided had a great weekend with great company. But the spending...

DD's party, house guests, food, daytrip out yesterday........Two steps forward, one back.

House is trashed again...

Oh well it's half term, no school run. Had to cancel today as DD was sick and had a high temperature. So we are in house today.

Going to do some tidying up again

Yes I agree with Jonty

Ah, the joy that is half term. Its dank and grey outside. Thank goodness for Lego.