Debt Number 3 : For those who feel they are drowning and want a way out

[TalkinPeace]

This thread follows on from Nerf's incredibly useful
FIRST www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1969188-Can-we-have-a-support-thread-for-people-who-are-massively-in-debt
and then
SECOND
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2011878-Debt-support-thread-2?
threads about realising you are in and supporting each other out of debt.

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1987219-SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important thing to remember is

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it.

On the home improvement/holiday front...I'm doing 2 things to keep me going...
1-I have an 'envelope' budget of 10pm for all those annoying little things (replacement toilet seat and a blind for DS room in that list at the moment...
2-I've decided to take a break from debt repayment at each milestone. So when I repay OD in June, July I will use debt repayment money for bedroom carpet and then back on the debt wagon on August. I'll do same once I repay CC2 and so on.

Thanks ladies, as always it's lovely to have a lift and I've just been for a lovely stomp in the woods with my doggy, which always helps!

I think I'm doing something similar to you mum2fergus, I've been putting £10 aside every now and again with the aim of putting a reclaimed new floor in in August. And you're right, it will be amazing to be able to take my boys skiing! And to bring the mortgage term down a bit. It's what's keeping me going at the mo.

And we all (mostly) :( have our families and our health and that is something to be grateful for!!

Thanks ladies, as always it's lovely to have a lift and I've just been for a lovely stomp in the woods with my doggy, which always helps!

I think I'm doing something similar to you mum2fergus, I've been putting £10 aside every now and again with the aim of putting a reclaimed new floor in in August. And you're right, it will be amazing to be able to take my boys skiing! And to bring the mortgage term down a bit. It's what's keeping me going at the mo.

And we all (mostly) :( have our families and our health and that is something to be grateful for!!

Thanks ladies, as always it's lovely to have a lift and I've just been for a lovely stomp in the woods with my doggy, which always helps!

I think I'm doing something similar to you mum2fergus, I've been putting £10 aside every now and again with the aim of putting a reclaimed new floor in in August. And you're right, it will be amazing to be able to take my boys skiing! And to bring the mortgage term down a bit. It's what's keeping me going at the mo.

And we all (mostly) :( have our families and our health and that is something to be grateful for!!

Thanks, thanks and thanks Puffy lol

So nearly payday here! Will have a good pour over spreadsheet tonight and do any tweaking required.

NSD today...DS with his Dad so I'm going to get final coat of paint on remaining 2 walls. Ooh and 17pnd of Tesco vouchers arrived so have put them on DS school uniform envelope.

Gah typed a long message then lost it.

DH has said he would like a baby. Hmmm. That'd be his first, my third. Lovely conversation but this changes everything financially, so some budget overhaul and planning will be necessary.

We need to set goals about debt repayments, cars, mat leave etc so I don't spend the whole time freaking out.

Wow.

no idea what happened there!!

Wow lookrightnow that's a bit mind blowing. Do you have much debt? Can a baby wait till you are more solvent?

Oooh,a baby...how exciting! Personally I'm of the opinion that if your mind is made up to have one...don't let anything get in the way-you will always find a way to cope with everything else...good luck!!

But just for once it would be nice to have something you have chosen yourself rather than something that someone else has rejected or discarded!
Hmmm.
I find that attitude very negative and short sighted.
If a piece of furniture is good enough to be used by more than one family, why on EARTH should it be dumped.
Antiques are just posh leftovers.
There is this obsession with "new" - primarily among those who can least afford it.

Furniture, clothes, tools, cars, houses - lots of things are better second hand as you know they will last

Until you stop craving "new stuff" you will never be free of the risk of getting into debt.

Well that was a short lived idea

I'm just too worried at the moment. With debt as it is at the moment (and having reduced payments) we'll have it gone in a year. I just can't relax knowing that once it's gone we'll have an extra £600 pcm. If we both REALLY wanted it we'd make more sacrifices etc etc, but we're not there yet.

There are so many reasons NOT to have a baby right now. (See previous posts!)

Hi - don't seem to have posted for a while. Totally blown budget here. Toothache and trip to emergency dentist yesterday. Appears I have an infection due to wisdom teeth coming through. Face swollen and have been throwing up all day, not sure if that is a different sickness bug or a reaction to antibiotics. Feeling miserable

Went to NHS dental centre though so appointment only £18 plus prescription charge. Have to follow up with my dentist. Luckily had £50 in emergency fund. Plus got fish and chips for my kids today as couldn't face cooking. Horrible weekend

Really sorry to read your post, ishesingle. Hope you feel better soon.

ishe I think cooking is the last thing you need to worry about! Sickness is most probably reaction to antibiotics. Can you take them with food? Wisdom tooth infections are shitty. The antibiotics should kick in soon for you though. Hope you feel better soon .

I think that is where I went wrong Kinky, took this morning's dose without eating, and now, having been sick all day, I can't eat! I've had some fruit in the last hour and kept that down though. Going to try some toast and will take a tablet after that and see what happens.

Had no idea dental access centres existed though. The max they can charge you is £18. Was referred to one after calling 111 on Saturday morning after several emergency dentists had no space for me. Remember that tip guys if you are ever in the same situation! Love the NHS :-)

ishe try eating yoghurt with the antibiotics, if you don't have any maybe ice cream would work. Works for us anyway, vaguely recall something about it lining the stomach. Hope you feel better soon.

Thanks Puffer, had ice cream in the freezer and that was something I could face eating, so I've done that. So far, so good...

ishe not sire about the effect of yogurt with antibiotics, however I would definitely recommend a probiotic yogurt after you finish the course to rsstore your 'friendly' gut flora.

I have had a mixed week. No big spends earlier in the week, although I did go for dinner with friends on two evenings this week. We had a family dentist trip this week too, for me was basic check up cost, but dh needs a filling, costing £50. The fab weather has sucked me in this weekend. I bought picnic stuff and beer yesterday (£30) and as ed sat drinking coffee in the morning sun, dh and I decided to put the Bbq on. It is DH's birthday on Wednesday, so we did this rather than a meal out. We spent £45 on charcoal, food and some wine.

apart from groceries and petrol, we have no big plans this week, so should havd several NSDs.

On the down side, my car , a convertible, has got some problems with the roof. This will cost at least £800 to fix and I have resigned myself to not being able to drive with the roof down anymore. I need to at least seal it to stop it raining inside though :(

I feel so sad about my car but just can't justify the added expense. I have not added s single pound to our debt in 3 months and have paid off nearly £2000. Well done to those of you who are just chugging along, and sorry to hear about your grandad Nerf . I had a nice grandad, he passed 5 years ago and I miss him every day.

Slightly better today. Dentist changed tablets and wants to see if tooth gives me any more hassle before referring me for hospital removal. Is stuck just under the gum. Booked me in for hygienist appointment too. Total cost for 2x appointments plus hygienist plus prescriptions is £80ish. Have played wack-a-mole in ynab to pay for it all and have created a new dental category with enough for one check up and hygienist appointment every 6 months. I haven't been for years and it's very silly not to. Lesson learnt

Glad you're feelin better ishesingle, tooth pain is the absolute worse, I would sooner give birth than have another tooth issue again!!

We too have been caught out with dental problems recently, Dp has to have a crown at £200 shortly. I could cry :(

We've got a health/dental category in our budget for £20pcm. I agree with giving birth again over dental work. Ouch!

So we have good news... DH has received a bonus (to be paid on Friday) it's £2200 . He's a higher rate tax payer though so maybe £1320?

I'm so pleased - he's worked so hard, but more pleased as the first thing he said was which debt would it go towards?

I hope no-one minds sharing good news. Can't tell anyone in RL.

Look don't mind at all, am very !!! That's super news though! I hope you find some (cheap) way to celebrate .

I'm getting hit by the vets rather than the dentist. £70 yesterday, appt still tonight which will be another 20/30ish, then cat needs dental op in a fortnight for £250 and a second booster jab the week after. Gah!

Excellent news LookRightNow...well done to your DH (and great that he is onboard with your plan!)

kinkydorito vets bills is partly how we got stuck in this mess, (or should I say lack of budgeting and lack of an emergency fund!!)
We had to fork out almost £500 for pancreatitis in our dog, the insurance only covered some of the £1000 plus bill :( I hope your cat will be ok - it's so worrying, isn't it, they're like our other babies!

Fantastic news lookrightnow spend it wisely! We're not jealous at all, are we ladies well done to hubby for optin to pay off debt

ishesingle I am actually having an impacted wisdom tooth out tomorrow! It was infected a while ago and I would insist if I were you on going on the list to have it out NOW - it takes aggggggges to actually get referred (up to 10 months in some areas) and once it gets infected it will just keep recurring.

I had my other one out in Feb and it had been infected about 5 times by then, the surgeon said the tissue all around the tooth was permanently damaged by so many recurrent infections.

I sound lovely now don't I the problem is that you actually can't clean them effectively when they're half in and half out of the gum.

lookrightnow
well done on your DH getting a bonus.
Put £50 of it towards a nice lunch out somewhere (fixed price lunch menus go a lot further than a la carte suppers) as there is no point in being rewarded without having some pleasure

and then put all of the rest towards the highest costing debt so that next time ALL of the bonus will be yours to enjoy.

And yes, its not the sort of thing you can talk about in public - that is what threads like this are for