Emmsys angels xxx support for mummies of lost angels part 3 xxxxx

[christmasBarbielovesSanta]

so here we are on part three, let this one be fun of happy news.....

Evening everyone,
Thanks for your messages, I know deep down i'll get there but had a long chat with DH tonight and think its a case of mini steps.
Yesterday and today have not been good days felt complelty washed away and have cried at the slightest thing.
I know what some of you mean about seeing babies, as I was in a queue on Sat with my niece in Debenhams and was behind a man with a baby in the end I had to leave my niece to pay I couldnt bear to look at the baby

Anniecam - I do remember you, and am sorry for your loss. The ERPC was not as bad as I imagined and really was the best route for me. I'm sure you will be fine.
I could have had as much time as I wanted from docs off work but thought it would be best to try and make those first steps.

My DH has kept telling me to speak to someone who has been through similar experiences, and you have been very nice and understanding.

I do have one question roughly how long after the ERPC should I expect my AF? It will give me something to look forward to x

Really depends zen, some people get it back very quickly others take a good few months for everything to settle down.

Zen
With my first Mc I had my AF 3 weeks after, but everybody is different.
I hope you feel better soon

Love you all
LO

bloody internet im off to sort out a connection date for the new villa today...hopefully i will be back on line in the next two weeks, in the men time forgive my lack of postings, i have just enough time to read all of yours, check my emails and job search...at least im up to date with all of you as i check regulary!
As for me, i cant get to a dcotors for a while we need our visas and then they dont have normal doctors, more ones for certain problems so ill probably have to go to a womens clinic or something...

mollie no im not usiing the stick things, all of my things are a the port waitiing to be checked through customs...i will have to start temping and peeing on sticks as i have no idea what the hell is going on!

Big love to all xxx

Hi barbie, I think peeing on the opk's would be a good idea, with no af you can atleast work out if you are ovulating or not.

zen, after my 1st mc, I had an ERPC, af arrived 5 weeks later. After 2nd mc, which was natural, af arrived 4 weeks later. Hope this helps.

giraffe it is so hard seeing other pg ladies, but hang in there, it will get easier xxxxx

Hello everyone else, hope you are all ok

Morning ladies. Well i ended up at hospital yesterday, been having really bad cramps and yesterday just as DH got in from work i felt an almighty gush and the carpet beneath me turned crimson- i have never seen so much blood at one time in my life-was truly awful. DH helped me to the bathroom and as was passing large clots he phoned the hospital,was told to take me straight in. Had drip put straight on as was starting to pass out due to blood loss, Dr examined we and said i was starting to pass my angel but was stuck in my cervix,he had to remove it with small forceps-horrendous pain. Was kept in hospital and let out this morning.

I feel a bit of relief that its come to an end and i wont need ERPC now, but just feel so very very sad and lost and empty. DH is off work today so he is going to take DS out for the day.

Hugs to everyone.X

annie you have been really really brave. Thinking of you lots

annie as mermaid says, you have been so, so brave. I've went through similar with the first m/c (though I still needed the ERPC) and it was so frightening. Did they give you any iron tablets? I was on some for quite a while afterwards. Take care of yourself

Hi annie, you are being so so brave. I ended up in hospital the same as you with 2nd mc, put on a drip etc, then let home the next day. You will feel a bit empty now but take some time for yourself. It sounds like you have a wonderful dh taking care of you.

What a truly hideous and scary time Anniecam

I hope you are feeling better and resting at home now.

re the iron tablets - I've just been put on them - 12 weeks post MC Went to the GP because I was feeling continually dizzy, tired and sick - whilst on the 2 week wait, I welcomed the symptoms and hoped I was PG. After I got AF, I just got fed up with it and saw a GP - surprise, surprise, I'm anaemic and she was horrified that I hadn't been prescribed any after the MC, which sounds like it was very similar to yours in terms of blood loss

Barbie - are these little bleeds you are having very light with quite think pinky red blood ? If so, they may be decidual bleeds, which might suggest you aren't ovulating ? Deffo worth getting that checked - I think they can do blood tests on CD21 to check you are ovulating and, if not, there is stuff they can prescribe to kick-start that process. Good luck

Busy at work (away on business with no internet in hotel), so am lurking but finding little time to post. Will catch up with everyone later

annie that sounds just awful. It will take time to come to terms with your loss - just be kind to yourself and don't take too much on. Have some sofa days, get DP to supply chocolate & tea. My thoughts are with you.

Annie, I'm sorry.. That was awful.Please take it easy, you have to relax.

Sorry I did not mention everybody I'm alittle down today.

Love you all

Lo

Annie - what a terrible experience for you. My mc has been difficult to cope with at times in terms of blood loss but doesn't compare to what you've been through. I just hope that you and your dh can find some peace now to grieve and recover.

Giraffe - hope today is a better one for you. I think most people in our shoes experience the odd "maudlin mugging" as one of my good MN friends says. We all have our moments.

Well I'm off my clinic appt in a bit. My hope is that they will confirm that everything has "passed" (and I have reason to believe it has) and that I won't have to have an EPRC on top of the week from hell.
Fingers crossed.

Hope it all went well for you wasa at the clinic today xx

wasa I hope everything is ok..
Good Luck.

Love you all

Annie - so sorry you had to ensure the pain. I totally understand how you feel once it seems to come to a conclusion, and the empty feeling.

Hope everyone is feeling a bit better tonight and hugs back to you all. I certainly have had my quota this week.

Wasa hope everything was ok today ? xx

oh Annie what a terrible ordeal you've gone through and you have been so brave. My first mc was v. similar and its so scary, painful and heartbreaking feeling/seeing your lost lo come away, but to have to get forceps, God I hope they gave you some gas and air...

wasabi - hope your app't went well. I like that phrase 'maudlin mugging' and can definately relate!

Zen AF came back 23 days after 1st natural mc and 25 days after ERPC.

lobeov - sorry to hear youv'e been down today. It does get easier, two steps forward, one back...

Jools - hope the iron tablets kick in soon

mermaid - how are you feeling this week?

barbie - good idea re: OPK, hopefully give you some peace of mind (and lots of bd if they are +ve!)

to Vjay, MM, Mollie sabs, Heebee, Ginger

Hey everyone. No time to catch up properly but just wanted to check in. Hope you are okay Anniecam - what a horrible thing to go through Be good to yourself and try and take one day at a time.

In case you are online VM I just wanted to say I am thinking of you. Stay strong sweetie and come back when you are ready. We'll be right here xxx

Big hugs to everyone else. I'll catch up properly soon, I promise

Oh Annie so sorry hon, had exactly same with my first natural mc, didnt pass properly, had days of agonising cramps/contractions, ended up rushed to A&E by ambulance put on morphine and had same horrible forceps experience as was stuck in cervix, from a cold horrible gynae nurse, they let me home straight after but still high from morphine so was all a bit of a daze. DH was amazing as always..

Thinking of VM still and hope wasabi ok today..

See mermaids post - thaks for being honest hon, I can totally understand

To be totally honest with you all I am gonna try and keep a bit of distnace now cos after hearing vm news I'm a freaked out mess and I dont think its doing my positive thinking much good reading all your horrible mc experiences and re living mine constantly. I am in constant anxiety that my 4th preg wont be ok even tho i'm taking the aspirin and progesterone supps. Meant to wait til next tues for next scan but that will of been 11 days and as lost angels no 2 & 3 at week 9, but scan at week 7 was ok, I'm obsessing that i need a week 8 scan and cant let this week go without turning into a blubbering mess, called EPU this morning to see if can go tomorrow. Tues will be 9 weeks exactly so keep thinking of vm too. See - this forum is really not helping me right now I'm afraid .. Please dont think i'm not incredibly grateful for support I've had previously tho... I love you al and wish you the best and will keep lurking and posting possibly, I dont know where I'm at to be honest... xxxxx

4ever gorgeous and strong lovely lady I am sending all my very positive thoughts to you and so understand how you are feeling. It is not at all good for you to be here even though we love you lots. So off with you remember - strong positive thoughts and every day at a time.
I found the ladies at the knicker checker thread were lovely. I will check on youxx

just wanted to say to VM that I am so sorry about your bad news and will be thinking of you over the days and weeks to come. please take care of yourself. x

Thank you Mermaid sweetheart for your lovely kind words of wisdom. You are so right.. I may lurk but delved into knickercheckers world earlier.. Love you all so much & will still lurk to see how you're all doing and for hopeful good news for you all soon xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

4ever, I hope everything goes ok with you, I really undestand, about your scan try to get just to help you to relax, evething is going to be fine.If you need us we are right here and remember 2009 is our year!!!
XOXOXOXO

VM and Wasabi I hope you guys feel better today.

I know I need to catch up with all of you, I will tonight, but I wanted to wish a lovely day to everybody.

I love you all

4Ever pop over in about 30 weeks and let us know how you are doing

I can completely understand your need to avoid some parts of MNet for your own sanity - I think I will be the same

Look after yourself and that precious cargo

Ahh you guys are gonna make me cry, I dont wanna leave, but I probably must! I have tears in my eyes reading your lovely posts Jools and lobeov! Mermaid more tears burning eyes when I went to knickercheckers and saw you there to check on me! Thank you so much for being adorable and wonderful and kind and remembering our lil ox! xxxxxx I'll be wishing amazing things and praying for you all my darlings xxx I love you all so much and couldnt have got through the last months without you... I will still lurk and will never leave completely! HOpefully I wont be back for other reasons and hope I'm not pre-empting things by going away ... Must stay positive... Must stay positive!

Love you all massively xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx