Emmsys angels xxx support for mummies of lost angels part 3 xxxxx

[christmasBarbielovesSanta]

so here we are on part three, let this one be fun of happy news.....

mermaid a big sandy and slightly windswept hug from me, bloody shit! wont write any more due to the fact everyone has already covered everything but im thinking about you love x

jools my lovely im with you on this one, went to the mall yesterday thinking about buying a pg test as still no af and with dh being back for 6 weeks and the fact i have been feeling tired and sore boobies...anyway found a supermarket but popped into the bathroom first and i saw blood the biggest fear was that i had only gone and put on white linen trousers on a had a small tear but then positive barbie kicked in and i thought well maybe this just might be a full period as i havent had one since sept....but ouch i have become the biggest bitch !!! so im going to sulk in the corner with you and feed my chocolate cravings!

mm i have recommended friends for you on facebook, add them and the wonderful world of mn will unfold in front of you....

Hi to all the girlies posting on my fb, what fun!!!!

And to lighten the mood we have a villa!!!! so cute all paid for so just waiting to get our visa to realease the container from the port so we can move in

Love to everyone especially mermaid, dont leave us hun, we have helped you through it before and we are here to help you again xxx

Oh mermaid I'm so sorry! This is bitter. Know that I'm thinking of you and especially at your scan; I'm so glad you got it moved up a day.

Ladies, sorry I haven't been on for a while - have just felt too rotten and pathetic; coping with the school run and very basic life seems to be all I'm capable of at the moment! Just wanted to say that I'm thinking of you all; apologies for not writing to everyone individually but I hope to get a functioning mind back one of these days! xx

Mermaid I'm thinking of you today
MM I had some of my results back yesterday, apparently my cardiolipin antibodies (2nd test) were negative (which I take it means not a problem) but the sample for Lupus Anticoagulant wasn't labelled properly so they couldn't test it It took them an hour to get enough blood out of me and then they cock up the labelling So back to GP to get that done again and then wait for the rest of the tests, so one down 3 to go! Appt is 17th Feb oh and I added you on FB
lobeov How are you feeling today?
gingermumi I thought I'd added you so must have sent a message to some random person instead I was comparing photo on here to FB, maybe you'll have to give me hints, I'd say your initials but I don't want to out you! I think that's a good idea to just see what happens, I am hoping for a BFP, you simply must have another your dc's are all gorgeous
Vjay Sending you relaxing positive vibes
Blue Another ER fan here, I hope everyone else absolutely bawled at Pratt dying? What a mess I was You don't happen to like Brothers & sisters too do you? I love it!
Jools Sorry to hear you had such a bad day yesterday, I know that every blip I had was linked to hormones (and still is) at the start it was when I OV'd and then when AF was due I'd be a wet snivelling mess! It does calm down, but takes time. Hope you feel a little better today
Barbie So pleased you have got the villa you wanted, it will be like a little home from home once you get your furniture in. Look forward to seeing some pics of it on FB
VM I'm sure your functioning mind will be back very soon, and we'll all be waiting patiently for you. Take care and take it easy on yourself x

Mollie waves to everyone else, but will probably be back on here later as she's hurt her back and off work AGAIN!

Also meant to say to Barbie I really hope this is a proper AF on the way (although I would prefer a BFP of course ) but at least you can get back to some normality then and start obsessing planning

H8 Mollie

Yes, I bawled my eyes out at Pratt dying and was secretly hoping it was PG hormones as I was on a 2WW at the time !

Sorry to hear about your results fiasco I hear similar stories too many times.

I'm glad you said you still have trouble with hormones playing havoc at AF time - I literally could not stop crying last night - about absolutely nothing - I wasn't feeling particularly sad or thinking about anything special - just crying The same thing happened soon after I went to bed, before I left the house this morning and I've had a couple of times this morning when I've struggled to hold it together at work

I was beginning to think that this might be the start of depression (kind of feels like it) and I'd end up back at the GP Hopefully this will pass as AF goes on though - fingers crossed.

Still thinking of you Mermaid

Oh, meant to say hi to Barbie aswell - hope this is a proper AF for you and we both have our cycles back I'll race you to a BFP in around 28 days

Hi all

Mermaid I've been thinking of you -hope you are as ok as you can be

Mollie sorry about the results fiasco. I'm going for similar tests on thursday - Lupus, cardiolipin antibodies, thyroid and killer cells. How long did it take to get the results (you did get) back? My consultant wants to see me with them. My consultant has also told me to take a junior asprin a day until I'm 12 weeks.

Jools hope you're feeling a bit better today. I cried on the train on the way to work yesterday because a sad song was on my mp3 player I'd forgotton the havoc that AF creates..

Barbie good news about your villa!!

Good to see you Heebee - meant to say that yesterday when you popped in but was too wrapped up in misery I'd been wondering how you were getting on.

Has anyone heard from Lionstar recently ?

I think this is the worst AF I've had since I was a teenager I know I can sometimes get very irritable and angry and throw things at DP, but I've never been weepy like this before - very strange

Mermaid, you are on my thoughts I hope you are ok.

Hello Ladies today is a very particular day , I live about 2 hours north of Miami and about 3 hours south of Orlado, today is very gloomy and cold.. yes cold.. we are in the 50, so it is a very depresing day and not only that I can't move my neck , I think the stress is killing me, I don't know what to do to relax..I'm sory I'm very whiny today
I could keep going...

No worries Jools! Funnily enough, this is my 2nd AF since the 2nd m/c and I have never suffered from such bad pmt in my life. I've been irrationally irritated and weepy for about a week now. It is very odd.. I'm starting to take EPO again to try to lenthen my cycles, so fingers crossed that does some good...

Hi lobeov it sounds like we could all do with some sunshine. The neck sounds really painful. Have you got any of those heat wraps?

hello ladies, sorry to hear so many of us are feeling down at the moment, I have been lurking and reading about you all, I have just crammed my life full to take mind off scan next Monday, hence this hurried post. Sorry not to reply to you all individually, but just had to come on to send mermaid a big, sandy hug, it is just so so so UNFAIR hon, am thinking about you and hope you got better treatment at the hospital today xxxx

How's things mermaid? Hope you are ok. Thinking of you.

Sabs, I teach English to 16-19 year olds and adults too, i love it but it's hard working at any job when you have a little one.

Mollie thanks for comments! Initials are JS if that helps! FB Profile pic is me with DS - i have lots of ginger hair! LOL. I am a bit rubbish at FB TBH. DD1 set it up for me and put christening pix on, i must learn how to upload some more!

hello to everyone else

Meant to say hello and welcome to lobeov - great to have someone from the States on here too!

Jools and Heebee, if it's any comfort, my AFs after my mc were a hormonal rollercoaster too and constant weeping without cause was a real factor. It IS the hormones at play and you just feel totally at their mercy.

Mollie, you must be so frustrated at not getting your results as promised! But as you say, at least it's one down.

barbie, your villa sounds fantastic; I really hope this is going to be the start of a very happy time for you and dh.

mm, hope work is going OK!

((waves to sabs, scamper, gingermumi and everyone I haven't mentioned by name))

Oh ladies I'm feeling miserable this afternoon because a friend of mine has just told me that she's convinced that the stress and anxiety I was feeling at the time of my pg last year caused my mc - you can imagine how that's added to the stress and anxiety I'm feeling now!

I am sortof ok.... in love with my new consultant.. yep its those hormones... and I have a bit of paper with long words on and they are giving me a PLAN.. feel like Russia in the 50s.. mad historians brain today.
How 2 such lovely people were conjured up for me at 9 this morning I dont know. the midwife was just amazing she did a full scan of everything, ovaries etc, all normal, nothing lurking and everything gone. They managed to find all old notes and are talking to mc specialist to formulate my PLAN, had to write that again sorry. I signed a form to send my baby - I got asked what I would like them to call my 9 week old baby - so I said a baby if that ok - and they took the box next door to have a look. They are sending the box up to Bristol for cytogenetic testing and will ring me later today with details of my PLAN. As we left, I took my mum, dh up to ears on work the midwife said keep taking the folic acid, as soon as you have your af go for it and come back in whenever you like for a scan, open invitation - could have cried. yep mermaid will be dashing to Ann Summers and underwear stores to lure reluctant dh and then camping outside scanning room for 9 months! so now maybe formulating secret mermaid plans. Lovely consultant asked if I had support - told him about you all and he said he would remember to tell other women..
Thank you each and everyone of you for all your kind words and thoughts
barbie a villa wow, this af will be mean an equilibrium, is that spelt right? and you can get organised!
vm i am glad to hear you are feeling so pregnant, your next scan cant be far away now.
mollie did you just mention blood tests going wrong? my lupus one clotted before they could test it and test still has'nt come back for that one, must be quite common thing to happen - The lupus and anticardiolipin, yes I got given information on me!
jools equilibium - key word for today its your bodies way , adjusting back - your hidden Bodecia is emerging, channel it!
opps school run grit teeth they all know when they see dh drop ds off that it will have happened again. Huge kisses and salty hugs

Oh mermaid you are being so brave about this it just bowls me over - I'm thinking of you sweetheart. x

vm so not right - close ears and dont listen. well meaning friends are lovely etc and use hindsight cos its very handy. You are very sensible and amazing, just feeling weak and vulnerable. more hugs xx

we are going to be late for school!

Thanks mermaid - I'll try to cling on to what you say about hindsight as I think my sanity would go if I really believed that my friend was right!

Mermaid - I'm crying for you (blardy hormones ) Two reasons - one is that you have found such fab support and have a PLAN and two - because you sound like you again

VM - talk about saying the wrong thing at the wrong time Please ignore it. Think calming thoughts, consider hypnotherapy / acupuncture, book a spa day or a nice treat, go swimming - just keep busy busy busy and read all the positive stories on here.

I think I will be better once AF has left the building and I can start DOING something again, ie trying to seduce DP at the right time, tracking EWCM, 2WW .... I had a day off the diet last night and ate chocolate fudge cake that DP bought me . Even avoided the gym because I felt so pants - I never ever use AF as an excuse - so from tomorrow, am back on the fit and healthy wagon. I did try today, but there is chocolate cake on the desk opposite me and I need some to fix the fact that I've eaten a healthy snack of nuts and my throat has started swelling up

You guys are so strong are brave.. I don't know how you guys do it..
Mermaid I really admire you.

Mermaid - I'm so glad to hear you got good support this morning and have a PLAN. A bit of direction at times like these goes a long way. It makes a huge difference when you feel people are on your side.

VM definitely ignore. Not true and not helpful. Thanks for the AF tip - after the 1st m/c I had acupuncture which probably helped, but I'm too skint at the moment to go for it at the moment!

I dusted off my cb monitor when AF started and it was on day 100, so I guess it was 100 days since my bfp...

vm stress doesn't cause miscarriage, I know I've read that somewhere, so don't worry.
mermaid it sound like you have a fabulous midwife and consultant there who really know what they are doing and how to make us miscarriage sufferers feel better. I love the open invite for the scan that is fabulous. I wish I could have that. I got told last time that they don't like scanning too much, of course thay don't it costs them doesn't it, but surely our mental well bieng is more important
jools one or even two days off the wagon won't hurt, in fact I think it's good for you.
Hello to all you lovely ladies xxxxx

Hey Mermaid I love your PLAN. You are so brave - you have me crying now too. Get that next AF out of the way and then I'll be with you trying for that BFP, along with everyone who is going for that good news over the next couple of months.

VM send your friend over and I will slap her. VJ is right, anything I've heard suggests that most MCs are down to random once-off chromosomal stuff (boy that is hard to spell!) and the only thing thing your friend has achieved is to make you more stressed and so make your morning sickness worse . I'm sure she meant well but try to ignore her.

Hang in there Jools and Heebee those hormones are just awful. These last two AFs since the last MC had me absolutely despairing - I was a big mess. A couple of days later I was fine again though.

Big waves to Scamper MM 4ever ginger VJ Barbie Mollie Lobeov and anyone I've missed

Have made a positive step tonight Have made an appointment to speak to a counsellor about going on the Cambridge Diet for 2 - 4 weeks.

I know they don't recommend dieting when TTC or being PG and I would stop as soon as I got a BFP, but I just feel the need for something to try and shrink my lardy tum. Being significantly overweight is a miscarriage risk I'm told (am 3 stone over my ideal weight for height), so I'll try it just to kick start losing the first half stone. I have read stories on here about people conceiving whilst on this diet - I've got no worries on that front as it is nutritionally balanced.

I feel better just doing that