Emmsys angels xxx support for mummies of lost angels part 2 xxxxx

[barbie1]

Hello to everyone coming over from the previous thread and for all the new girls who will sadly be joining us...
You will not find a better bunch of girls to help you through such a hard time, we will get through this with the help of each other xxxx

mollie, jools you are both doing the right things for ttc so don't feel guilty in any way. I may even join you both in the new year, new years resolution.

vm Your ds sounds like a smart boy (must take after his mum there). We have told dd that santa can't pay for all the toys so we need to give him the money for all her presents, I started this after my friends dd opened all her presents then asked "what did you get me mum". Enjoy it while ds is still believing, that's what makes it so exciting. Thinking about you on your 2ww I remember too well all the tricks your mind/ body plays on you.

barbie glad to see we still haven't heard from you......hope you enjoying yourselves (tempted to add a wink).

daisysmummy hope the medication has helped and the infection clearing up.

Big waves to you all, mm xxx

Hello ladies, just a quick note to wave to everyone. Been busy with Eid, RL, and lots of family stuff. Just waiting for AF to visit me in the next 1 - 2 weeks so that we can ttc again. The timing coincides with my travelling to India so not too sure if thats a good thing or not?

Will catch up later on in the week.

Someone's going to have to start a new thread soon....!

Hello everyone, RL is really taking over at the moment, i've got 2 cakes to ice, I have wrapped most of the presents, i'm trying to organise next years course for my degree, plus the funding for it.....so much to do, which is good,as it leaves me little time thinking to symptom spot during the 2ww

hello lovely ladies! Am a bit drunk so apologies if not making too much sense...had our work xmas drinks tonight, am seriously out of practice on the booze front and so am floored after 4 glasses of wine...this is taking a long time to write! But DH in the bath and wanted to catch up with you all...

jinglejools hurrah for good old fashioned sex!! Its so easy to lose sight of just being together in the desperation of mc and then ttc. Your fitness stuff is inspiring - I really need to get back in shape, not that I was really in shape before, but I would settle for a semblance of shape right now. Being around pg ladies is hard I agree. I still don't have a way of really dealing with it myself, other than to think that it will be our time soon

christmasbarbie hope you are making the most of having DH back at last...

vm and vjay ahh the tww. Am keeping fingers crossed for you both. I finished my tww last weekend which ended with a visit from AF but am hoping that this month will be the one...5 months now since the last mc...I reckon my next ov will be between xmas and new year when we are on holiday, so plenty of time and energy to devote to the important things in life

lionstar guess you may be in tww too if you were right about ov? Good to hear from you and that things have settled down a bit. Hope your cold flu thing is getting better

bluechristmasbauble thank you for the positive news about your friend. I am just heart broken for my friend, so it is good to hear about others who have gone on to have a healthy DC. I haven't even been able to speak to my friend yet because she's so wiped out by it all, but have had lots of texts

sabs hope RL is treating you well babe. When are you off to India?

mollieandivy its so hard knowing the best thing to do isn't it? Sometimes I can't help taking a what will be will be approach, because there is so much of this we can't control. Try to do whatever feels natural to you and DH

mmulledwine how're you? I think waiting to start ttc is very good idea. Mc takes more out of us than we realise at first. In retrospect would have been better for me and DH to wait for a bit, but now we've started, feels funny to stop. Am trying not to get too manic about it though

daisysmummy hope you are okay

curlee hello my neighbour! Hope life is good with you up the road. Had a long walk through greenwich park at the weekend, I love it there

scamper waves to the cave and gasps as she realises its nearly half past midnight and she really should be in bed!! xxx

Scamper - am v impressed by your "drunken" posting I have real trouble typing when inebriated but you've done really well

thanks Jools! It did take about an hour to type!! Am feeling a little the worse for wear today. Hope you all have lovely weekends xx

can I join you? Had mc last weekend. Have two grown up dds and a ds 11 months. Pregnancy was a bit of a surprise but we were really happy as ds wouldnt be the only little one. mc at eight weeks despite seeing heart beat a few days before. Feel absolutely rubbish, keep crying, feel really down and can't cope with normal things like going to the shops (can't make decisions or remember things) and going out in car (forget where i'm going, go the wrong way etc). Was going to go back to work next week but am scared i will just make a hash of everything. not coping with ds either, normally we have great time but i just can't do it at the moment, that makes me feel crap too. Didn't expect to feel this emotional and depressed, is it normal or am i being flakey?

Hello gingermumi, a very sad welcome to you. I'm so sorry for your loss. Everything you're going through is completely, 100 per cent normal; please don't blame yourself for your feelings in any way or feel that you should be 'coping'. I'd definitely take the time off work and just try to get past Christmas, making space for yourself and your family. I also had an unexpected pg which ended in a mmc in September and I was devastated. I already have a ds (age 7) and though we want to soldier on and keep everything going it's natural not to be totally in control - the memory lapses, loss of concentration, depression, constant crying - I've been there, believe me! You are doing really well to keep going and your ds loves his mum and won't be any the wiser, so don't worry. This awful pain will get better and you will heal, just give it a bit of time and be gentle on yourself. Sending you many ((hugs)).

Hi gingermumi

So sorry to hear your news I just wanted to reassure you that how you are feeling right now is perfectly normal - our hormones have a lot to answer for !!

You will gradually feel better and have more good days then bad, but will still have bad days - at least until the pregnancy hormones are out of your system. For me, that was just over 3 weeks after my MC.

All you can do is be kind to yourself - rest, eat chocolate, veg on the sofa if you can and allow yourself time to recover emotionally. Don't try to do too much too soon and don't judge yourself for being unable to do things - it is not you, it is the hormones . 4 weeks and 3 days after my MC, I'm finally feeling more or less normal again. You will get better - just give it time and keep chatting to us, as everyone in here knows exactly how you must be feeling.

thanks so much villagemum, just reading your message made me cry, i'm normally a strong person, this is so hard.

thanks jingle i thought hormones would go from your system quite quickly so the fact that they're still buzzing around makes sense. Had two mc between my dds and although it was along time ago i don't remember feeling like this. With the second mc i felt more physical effects than emotional ones, i was sick for weeks, they thought i had somesort of virus in the end and that had caused that mc and the sickness. I guess like pregancy it's going to be different each time. Will ring docs and ask for another certificate, she offered me two weeks originally but i turned her down and said i'd be ok.

gingermumi, come on here any time you feel down; the girls are fantastic (they kept me sane when it was all happening! - and after). Don't try to be strong... as jools says, the hormones are powerful things. They either take a while to go or you get a very sudden drop - in my case they plummeted and it really felt like some sort of horrible withdrawal; I was a basket case, nasty to everyone, weeping all day. Go get that certificate. You need a few duvet days if possible with the phone and the guilt button turned off! (VERY important to turn off the guilt button, ok?) ((Many hugs)).

Hi ginger, so sorry you've had to join us, I'm sending you big hugs. Like vm and jools say, take some time out, cry when you need to and talk when you need to, don't hold anything back, and I would definatly take that extra week off work xxx

Hi ginger, I am very sorry for your loss . I would echo what the girls have already said - take time off work and don't feel frightened about losing the plot a little, I think we have all been there. Hormones plus the natural feelings of loss and sadness that follow a mc are a pretty lethal combination, so take as much time as you need to just focus on you and your family, never mind about work.

Waves and kisses to everyone xx

Hi and welcome to ginger. How awful to mc after seeing a heartbeat... Hope you are taking the time off and bunkering down in the house to let yourself grieve. As the ladies say, you have to heal physically and emotionally

mollie - glad to hear you had a good appointment at your Drs, really hope things will be a-ok for Feb.

barbie - put your dh down! Hope you two (and the dog) are having a lovely reunion x

scamper - thinking about your friend, its so so sad...

Vjay and VM - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you now in 1ww land.

to sabs, jools and everyone else x

im backkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!
I have been thinking about you all so much but with hubby back, finishing the house and the dreaded christmas opening hours i have had no chance to post, but i wont leave it so long next time!!!!!
group hugs!

Well im going to read all that i have missed but wanted to say im here and i have missed you all xxx

Hi everyone!!

Working today and very quiet so good time to catch up with all you lovely ladies.

ginger so sorry for your mc. From my experience no two mc are the same, I have had 3 and all have been very different both emotionally and certainly physically. I guess we all hope to never have enough to start making comparisons but unfortunately a few of us can. Take as much time out as you need and don't feel guilty about it, listen to both your body and your instincts. You have came to the right place the girls on here have helped me keep my sanity when it all got too much. Take care and post as much as you need.

mollie still thinking about you hun, hope you are good.

scamper so good to see you are out enjoying yourself again, 'tis the season to be jolly' after all.

vm and vjay not too much longer to wait now, I remember how your body plays mind games with you, fingers crossed for you both.

blue how are you feeling hun, hope the ms is not kicking in too bad.

BARBIE HELLO!!!!!!!! Good to see you back, I have missed you but I know you have so much catching up to do. How is your DD, did you need to get the blood tests? Post when you get the chance. Will drop you a message when I get home so you have it again......keep forgeting.

I have been feeling pretty good this week, maybe it's all the Christmas stuff but I am finding longer spells in my day where I am not thinking about my mc's or ttc. This is a first in over a year so I think taking a break has been exactly what we were needing. TBH it is a relief and I actually feel that the old mm is still in there.....somewhere. Now I know this will be short lived and come Feb when we do start ttc again a whole lot of stuff will come back to the surface but boy it's good to get a rest. All smiles today even if I do have a cold coming on........ .

Big waves and hugs to sabs, curly, jools, lionstar, daisysmummy and anyone else I haven't mentioned in person........may be feeling better but memory is still shocking. Sending peaceful thoughts to you all, take care mm xxx.

Ginger So sorry you have had to join us, but welcome and hope you find all the support you need, the girls on here are just fantastic
Barbie Hope you have had the best reunion ever!
MM Glad to hear a bit of your old self has returned

I decided to write my Christmas cards today and I always use last years as a guide, unfortunately some of the close friends and family cards had messages saying how brill it was that we were finally pg, how our wishes had been answered etc etc, have to say I did have a blub and have now left them on the table to do later! Who would have thought last year we'd be back at square one 3 m/c's later. Oh well onwards and upwards to 2009!

Mollie send a big fat wave to everyone

mm, so glad to hear you sounding upbeat; I felt the same that cycle when we were trying NOT to conceive - it was a relief, a break, even though I was impatient to get going again. Enjoy the time out and getting yourself back!

Mollie, ouch at those Christmas cards; the reminders of what was can be so tough... whether Xmas cards or diary dates or old messages. Many ((hugs)).

barbie, yay for dh's return; hope you're having the best time!

blue, how are you feeling now? And how many weeks are you?

Well, I'm totally certain I'm not pg. AF is due in four or five days and I feel just as I always do beforehand. Wish I could say that I had loads of pg symptoms, but sadly it ain't so! I am going to have to find a way of dealing with ttc so that it doesn't take up as much mental space in the next few months as it has this month. In short, I am going to have to Get a Life. Any tips ladies?

((Waves)) to scamper and everyone else!

Hello my lovely ladies, welcome back barbie, hope you've been having fun
We need to start thinking about a new thread soon, this one is nearly full.
vm don't give up hope just yet, but if you're not this month, you can have all the yummy festive food and drink you want .
mm, glad you are feeling like your old self.
I had a very busy day a few days ago, and when I finally sat down that night I looked at my little ring on my little finger and just burst into tears. I remembered my two lovely angels and had a good cry. Felt fine afterwards, but it is funny how these things creep up on you.

Hello to blue mollie scamper jools ginger and everone else.

vm like vjay says don't count this month out just yet, but if you're not this month just sit back, relax and enjoy Christmas...... that's an excuse to have a glass of my mmulledwine, there's plenty to go round, cheers ladies (mm raises her virtual glass, after all I'm still at work).

Either way lots to look forward to in 2009.

Thanks VJay and mm... sigh. It's just that I've been having cramps today, at 10 DPO, so I'm thinking - great, not only is AF on her way already, but she's coming early!! Normally I never get these till the day before. Argh!

VM sorry to hear AF may be visiting you. Hopefully its all phantom symptoms...mm and Vjay have given some good advice there

VJay its true, I feel the same way, busy with RL, and then something just hits you and you remember all the sadness again...Hope we all have a positive 2009..

Mollie sorry re the cards, but good to hear you're feeling positive ...

mm hope the cold didnt get you....good to hear you're feeling positive too..

Barbie so happy to hear your having a good time with DH, etc ...How long b4 your big move??

Sorry that you have had to join us gingermumi the ladies on here are great and I see they have given such good advice. Chatting on here really helped me and get through the difficult times...

Had an x-factor night last night (happy Alex won, despite all that crying! Love JLS too!) and went to do some more shopping for India today...10 days to go..! and 8 days till AF visits me, hopefully it will be my last one for the next 9 months...

Waves to blue, scamperT and anyone else I've missed...hope everyone had a good weekend

Hello again, finally i have some time to myself! Its been a busy week since dh came home, we had the day off on monday and then it was all go....i have been working so much, trying to get everything tied up before i finish this coming sunday...i have been finishing about 10.15pm most nights and then trying to fit the gym and everything in before work, the house is almost complete, a final push this week should get us 99% finished. No christmas shopping done yet but we are planning a late night jaunt on tues...Dad is on the mend, slowly slowly....
We are moving about the 11th-15th jan, still waiting on visa etc...
Enough about me, it was nice to see mm so positive, it made me smile to know that we are finally all looking more positive for the new year
vm i hope it isnt your af, i have had funny pains going on, not sure what is happening as im not sure to count spotting as af i have my fingers crossed for you
mollie hello my darling, your hospital trip sounds good? how are you and the knee? Sorry about the card saga, just think next year you might have to put an extra name in the card, here is hoping for us all!
mm i have missed our chats so much, im sooooo glad you seem happier, bet dd is excited for santa!
hello ginger sorry you are here but welcome

Hi to everyone else, i promise to post more soon xxxx

hello ladies,

well I am pleased to report that I am feeling a bit more like the old Scamper, imbertween still having a good cry when needed. Caught up with a lot of old friends at a 40th bday party last night and was still dancing around the birthday girl's living room at 5am! Really paid for it today, basically the whole day wiped out by massive hang over from hell, but worth it. A couple of friends were there early on with their 7 week old daughter and I managed not to get weepy.

thank you for supportive messages about my friend. She still hasn't felt up to talking but I've been texting her every day. She was going to a carol service today so has at least managed to get out of the house.

ahh mollie to think of you and those cards. Reminders like that are bound to open the floodgates for a while. I also find it hard to believe that its nearly a year since I first saw my first BFP, but still no baby. Stay strong and hopeful hon, time is a funny thing - by this time next year we could be looking back on these days imbertween waddling around with big tummies, or even feeding and changing our DC

vjay sorry that you have also had a sad day. You are right, the sadness does creep up on us still, especially when we are busy and tired out. I had a little cry on friday night, took my glass angels off the tree and held them in my hands...sounds silly but i am really quite attached to them, its what they stand for

vm sad to hear AF may be visiting. I had a big strop last weekend when she visited me....sods law the same day another friend called to say she is pg! Am not sure how to keep ttc mania from taking over all available brain space, other than taking time to have some good old fashioned fun every now and then which has worked for me this weekend

mm glad to hear the old mm is still in there! Hope your spirits stay up over christmas, 2009 is going to be a positive year for all of us

barbie you sound rushed off your feet! Must be great to have DH back and very exciting about your move

sabs you must also be very excited about your holiday! Only a few more days at work to go. I hope AF doesn't come back after her visit in 8 days time to you. Tell her not to bother calling on me either

ginger how are you doing? Hope you are taking care of yourself

waves to blue curlee jools and anyone else I've missed, time for scamper to return to her bed xx