Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 8 ALL welcome!

[Sunbird24]

Exactly as the thread title says.
Some links to online resources that may be useful to anyone currently or recently going through this awful experience:

www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/
www.tommys.org/
Www.miss-support.org.uk/support/
www.blr.lifecharity.org.uk/
www.petalscharity.org/

www.miscarriageformen.com/

You are not alone - please post whatever you need, or just read if you aren’t ready to talk.

Link to previous thread:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/miscarriage/4732386-support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-mcmmc-thread-7-all-welcome?page=1

Thanks @ThelastRolo20 @FullMoon1917 I wish you both the best of luck with your next steps TTC.
37 here 😓 my cut off is middle of this year when I turn 38. Whether I will actually be able to stop is another question.

@CurlyWurly1991 why 38 out of interest? I suppose whether you stop is down to which path at that point is an easier one to travel!

Hopefully by summer we'll both have good news x

@CurlyWurly1991 my mum had my little brother (10 years younger) at just before 40 and given I have no kids and ideally want more than one I will prob keep going till I get some! Although adoption is most definitely on the cards.

I am definitely going to not be as crazy as i was with the testing and the timing as life is what happens when you're waiting!

Aw @FullMoon1917 i hope you have fond memories of your little bro arriving? I do have fears about it affecting my DD negatively.

@ThelastRolo20 kind of arbitrary cut off if I’m honest. I just said to myself I’d give it a year when we started TTC. My DH is 9 years older and that’s also in my mind. We would however qualify for some nhs fertility support by that stage, but not ivf as we have an existing child.

yes, let’s hope we are all pregnant and have our babies in our arms very soon!

@FullMoon1917 you're so right about life happens whilst you're waiting. I'll try my best to remember that for the next three months

@CurlyWurly1991 oh i do, he was almost like my own child in a weird way, my older brother is 2 years older than me and he was/and is very close to my little brother. Obviously theres sometimes friction but thats just family i guess.

@ThelastRolo20 i am glad it helped.

I hope we all have happier news 6 months from now!

Gosh, I am 38 in May and when I conceive successfully it will be my first. We will keep going as long as I can

Sorry @Orlahoping I didn’t mean to offend you 😔 the cut off in my mind is partly for my mental health and sanity, because I am struggling with living in TTC limbo land. I also have an older child who I’m not fully ‘present’ with while TTC and going through the MMC. I know I am very fortunate to already have a child xx
i wish you the best with your TTC journey x

@CurlyWurly1991 no no, not offended at all!! And I totally understand the impact on headspace. TTC is a complete head fuck. I can only imagine how hard it must be with a child to look after. Hard enough just looking after myself and my pets. I can totally understand putting a cut off on. 💓

Oh phew @Orlahoping that’s good I worried I had put my foot in it there. I don’t know really if I will ever be able to stop TTC if I’m honest.

@CurlyWurly1991 my response was probably quite panicky because my age is very much on my mind today, along with the fear it might take us ages to conceive again (and then the fear it will be another miscarriage etc etc). I'm just a big ball of anxiety basically!

Best of luck to you, and me and all of us. This is a fucking shit club but I have met some amazing women just in the last few days and feel less alone.

Absolutely understand the age thing- I was 34 when we started trying and am turning 36 this months, husband is 37 so less worry there but I’m aware of the clock ticking so to speak if it takes another 2 years at least to conceive again.
I am now 10 days since started bleeding, and 3 days since all confirmed clear on scan, bleeding ‘stopped’ 4 days ago and I’ve just had very very light spotting since which has pretty much stopped now. I haven’t taken any tests yet but will do so before we even think about trying again. I’m going to assume that by now I’ll be getting negatives or close to.
I’ve been given progesterone prescription if I fall pregnant again - wonder if taking baby aspirin would help as well, may ask my GP about this, does anyone take this?

Evening ladies

How are ye doing?I still struggling. I had the D&C on Wed the bleeding has calmed down I just feel exhausted & sick.Ive a horrible taste in my mouth too & am slightly constipated.
I just feel so shit I was 9wks6days when I had the d&c and am just heartbroken 💔

@Lemonyfire I know many people do take baby aspirin, I've heard conflicting information taking it really early so I'd seek some expert advice first 😊

@Duffy23 sorry you're feeling so down, I can honestly say today has been a struggle for me too, but more mentally rather than physically ❤️ it'll be all the hormones crashing around - it's brutal on top of the mental side of things. Be kind to yourself x

Hey, really sorry to just ask a question and not reply to others. I’m struggling to find motivation to check forums or do much at the moment. I hope everyone is doing ok though!
I just wondered, for those who tested in the weeks after a miscarriage, does this test look too dark for a test taken 2 weeks after surgical management of a miscarriage? I feel like it should have got much lighter by now? Just feeling a bit anxious as don’t want more surgery 😔

@Mrsspoon3 it'll quickly likely be fine a lot lighter, barely there in a week or so ❤️

How many weeks were you when you MC? If it's at peak hormone time it can take a while to get down x

@ThelastRolo20 Thanks so much! x
I was nearly 14 weeks when I had the surgery, but baby was only measuring around 7 weeks

Hi @Mrsspoon3 mine were like this too. They are quite a lot lighter now at nearly 4 weeks post surgery but the EPU are scanning me next week as it’s still positive after 3 weeks. I’ve heard some say it can take until the next period to get a true negative, but keep testing every few days or so to make sure it lightens. Take care xx

Thanks for the reply @CurlyWurly1991! Sorry to hear you have to go back for a scan, but hopefully everything is ok and they’re just taking a bit longer to go negative. It’s so frustrating when you just want to get on with things too isn’t it? Hope you’re not feeling too worried and your scan puts your mind at ease.
Thanks, will keep testing and hopefully it’s much fainter over the next week! 🙏

Hi all
Grateful for this thread. Had a previous mc around 6 weeks, then had my DS who is nearly 2 and going through what is my second m/c. Started spotting 5 days ago , today turned red and more visible on the pad. It was very different and all over in 48 hours with my first m/c but this seems to be dragging on! Please can someone share how long I can expect to go on with light bleeds before I pass the "tissue" ?
Got a scan at the EPU tomorrow

@MamaBear878 sorry you're going through this. I think it can really vary unfortunately, for some it took a few days even weeks, some like mine was mainly over in 48 hours.

Hope you get some clarity at the scan x

@MamaBear878 hi and so sorry you're having to go through this again. In the 5 weeks or so mine took I have read so many stories, papers, watched YouTube videos etc. The one thing i learned is that its different for everyone. Theres no research into it because its womens health and no one cares about womens health it seems.

Some people its over quickly, some (like mine) take weeks. Some have pain some don't. I know this isnt helpful and trust me we have all been there with the waiting not knowing what the hell is going to happen, but trust your body. As horrible as it sounds our body knows what to do. Trust your intuition and i hope it's not too painful when it happens xxx

Thank you very much for taking the time to reply @ThelastRolo20 and @FullMoon1917. You're both right. I'll have to just trust my body knows what to do. It's frustrating that the bleeding subsided this morning giving me false hope that "maybe" it could be ok...

@MamaBear878 I really hope it is good news. Best of luck at the scan x

Spoke too soon...it's back! But thank you nonetheless for your wishes @ThelastRolo20 ❤️ Hope you're doing okay too.