Journey after miscarriage support thread Jan 2023

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I wondered if anyone out there would be interested in joining a thread for those who have recently experienced a miscarriage - a place to share how we’re feeling emotionally, physical recovery, becoming ready to try again (for those that want to), and hopefully one day positive stories of successful preganancies.

I’m 32 and recently had a miscarriage at 5-6 weeks of my first pregnancy. I was relieved to have conceived after quite a short time, because I have PCOS and was worried I might struggle to get pregnant.

My miscarriage was about 2 and half weeks ago now, and today is the first day I’ve not had any spotting/bleeding at all, and that has been a relief to feel like my body is moving on from it. I know it’s advisable to do a pregnancy test a few weeks after miscarriage, which is something I’m a bit anxious about doing as I’m fairly sure it will be an emotional thing to do.

Since it happened my sleep pattern and energy levels have been a bit all over the place. Some days I’ve just wanted to sleep all the time, which I think could be a mix of actual physical tiredness and also emotional tiredness/hormonal changes. I was back at work for the first time today, and it was helpful to have something else to focus on and motivate myself for.

I’ve restarted tracking my BBT to see what happens with my cycle returning, though I’m aware it could take a while to get back to normal. My husband and I are both on the same page that we’d like to try again once I’ve had one normal period, so I guess we’ll just see how things go and how we feel when we reach this point.

Sorry this has turned into a longer post than I expected! Anyway, if there’s anyone out there who’s had a similar experience recently and would like a place to share feelings/questions/advice it would be lovely to hear from others.

@GingleAllTheWay2022 What do you mean by late ovulation though? Later than average or later for you personally?

Hey, I haven’t been on here much since I posted a while ago (but have been quietly lurking on and off)! How’s everyone doing?

My MC started over Christmas with bleeding/spotting stopping on 11th Jan. We wanted to try again before my first period but have been getting negative OPKs and weirdly since starting tracking my BBT I have a higher temp than I usually have pre-ovulation so assumed we’d just missed our chance and I ovulated pretty much straight after the bleeding stopped and before I started testing. Anyway today I took my last clearblue test expecting another blank circle and the thing started flashing at me! So wonder if I’m going to ovulate soon. Very confused about the higher temps though, have any of you experienced higher temps after a MC?

@tulipsunday I’m in a similar position to you too, trying for our second and have been trying since summer with one MC. I’m so sorry for your losses ❤️

My second miscarriage was a slightly early ovulation for me (day 12) I think as my cycles hadn't regulated fully since the first miscarriage. So I guess there may be something to do with late ovulation and increase miscarriage but in my case earlier ovulation didn't get a better outcome 😞

@Cinnamon03 so many people trying for their second. Sorry for all of your losses ❤️

All the best for this cycle! Xx

@Cinnamon03 I’ve had exactly the same absolutely nothing them had a clear blue so did it this morning and got a flashing smiley was a bit of a shock. I’m not very hopeful for this month but u never know been battling thrush since been on antibiotics so that’s defo my going to help but been necking my vitamins guess time will tell can always hope. Been going through my ok days and then horrific days where I don’t want to function I thought these would go away but so far nope still here.
been tracking my temps with my I watch, apart from one blip it all seems fairly accurate. I will keep my I watch on to track my heart rate as it can get high if I didn’t want to do that hmmm I’m not sure what i would do. I think I’d still wear as as if it’s going to be another Mc it’s going to be another MC and nothing will change that.
love to you all xxx

I think later than average, as in more than halfway through my cycle. I have a 30 day cycle, but think I ovulate on day 17 or 18. Still gives a 12 day luteal cycle which I think is still considered normal?

My cycle used to be shorter though, when I was TTC my son 5 years ago it was only 26 days. I don't think a longer cycle is a particularly good sign, could be my body winding down into the start of perimenopause. Or it could be nothing and I'm just a paranoid dafty! Like I say, it's the not knowing that drives me nuts.

@GingleAllTheWay2022 I see. I've always had long cycles. They were 34-38 days when I was first trying to get pregnant back in 2018 but after I had my son they went down to 29-35. I think as long as your luteal phase is long enough it doesn't matter when you ovulate :)

@GingleAllTheWay2022 I can relate completely to just wanting to know if there is an issue or not. This is why I keep going backwards and forwards as to whether to pay for private tests or not. At the moment thinking not but really don't want to go through a third miscarriage 😬

@GingleAllTheWay2022 Hi, i’m a PCOS’er and long time IVF veteran and one of the specialists I saw believes there is a link to late ovulations and miscarriage. If you ovulate late then sometimes the egg doesn’t have the energy needed to go the distance. It grew slowly, and sometimes it never quite catches up.

This isn’t meant to panic anyone! I always ovulate late and have 2 beautiful, healthy children- although desperate for a 3rd due to big age gap/secondary infertility etc… It’s just that SOMETIMES - not always, the late ovulation means the egg is a bit “tired”

It’s just one of those things, along with a whole host of other stuff. In a nutshell it’s just really shit luck, but the tide will turn for us all x

Just to add - both kids naturally conceived with late ovulation. Second child came along after yet another failed IVF. My little miracle!

@VillageFete If that was the case though wouldn't doctors be more concerned about getting women's cycles shorter? As far as I'm aware they're not normally worried unless a cycle is irregular or very very long.

As an anecdote, I've had two miscarriages with my shorter cycles but a full term pregnancy when I had longer cycles.

I think it depends on what your “normal” is.

I think PCOS can definitely play a part too as poorer egg quality and PCOS go hand in hand. It’s why I decided to have all of my embryos genetically tested before I transferred, so I knew chromosomally they were ok.

There’s something called a Mitoscore. It’s essentially how much energy your egg has. The lower the score, the better. It’s how embryologists decide what order to embryos back in if you’ve had them chromosomally tested in IVF.

The specialist said to me that in some natural cycles, the Mitoscore of the egg would be higher, but we can never know as obviously no way of testing in a natural cycle. He believes that sometimes (certainly not always) If you have a longer cycle and therefore ovulated later then your egg may not have the energy to go the distance - but more often than not it wouldn’t implant or it’d be a chemical - or sometimes a miscarriage.

Obviously this doesn’t apply to all late ovulaters or I and many of my PCOS/IVF friends wouldn’t have children, and we all do. But it can be one of the many causes of miscarriage.

Sperm is also really important- recent studies have shown that sperm quality is also a factor in some miscarriages. I had my DP on a decent multivit with Folate in (Not folic acid) and also a decent Omega 3 and his semen analysis improved greatly.

Unfortunately after we banked our embryos in the summer he stopped taking them.

There’s so many reasons and one “bad” egg and one “bad” sperm can be one of them. Not every sperm and every egg will be healthy every month.

Unless miscarriages are recurrent then it’s more often that not just one of the more simpler reasons, just bad luck - atleast that’s how it’s been explained to me over the years during fertility treatment and honestly I’ve seen more specialists than I care to count. This last year i’ve seen 1 in Cyprus, 1 in Canada (Zoom) 1 in Harley Street and 1 in Liverpool. I’m rapidly running out of cash!!

6 days post MVA and still a blazing positive on a FRER, I honestly thought it’d be lighter by now?! 🥺

I hope i’ve not worried anyone. I just wanted to explain that my understanding is that in some
occasional cycles the egg won’t have the energy needed to go the distance, and we see that sometimes in late ovulation.

Also it can be a chromosome issues. Obviously once am embryo is created, the sperm and egg have passed on their chromosomes to what is now the embryo- again, common that occasionally a chromosome will duplicate or one will be missing. It’s just one of those things. It happens sometimes.

If anyone wants to work on egg quality then Ubiquinol is your friend. It’s pricey but works wonders for egg quality. Solgar do a brand in Holland and Barret and American clinics put their IVF patients on it for a couple of months before egg retrieval.

Before my egg retrieval I took 3 tablets per day (300mg) for 10 weeks and out of 10 embryos, 6 were chromosomally normal. When I had my UK cycle without Ubiquinol, non were chromosomally normal- but to be fair they put me on the incorrect protocol and the meds I was having are notorious for reducing egg quality in PCOS’ers.

Vitamin D is also super important according to some of the specialists i’ve seen. I get the Better You spray for Holland and Barrett and my levels jumped up really quickly.

There’s a book called “It starts with the egg” by a scientist called Rebecca Fett. It explains things a lot better than I ever could! But it’s aimed at long term TTC’ers, IVF’ers and those with many a miscarriage under their belt.

@VillageFete It's ok, I was just curious :)

I've wondered about ubiquinol for myself but it's often so expensive I just can't justify it on top of my husbands pricy Proceive and our extra vitamin d :/

Sorry your tests are still positive :( My consultant said not to test before two weeks though so maybe it takes a long time.

@TheBirdintheCave Sorry to go off on one. It’s just you can’t help but pick all of this up when you’ve been TTC for so long. and of course, what one specialist says, another will disagree with so we can never know for sure. My takeaway from it was - sometimes you’ll ovulate late because the egg doesn’t have much energy, other times you’ll ovulate late because that’s your normal that month, other times you won’t ovulate at all (This happens a lot to me)

I’d say Ubiquinol is essential for IVF because nature isn’t at play. Not so essential when TTC naturally - unless a history of miscarriage maybe.

It’s very pricey. H&B have a buy one get one half price offer on it at the minute but it’s still so expensive.

I am booked in for a scan in 2 weeks, and will test again next week and pray it’s faded. It’s still as bloody positive as it was before the procedure! They scanned me during the procedure and were confident that they’d removed all necessary tissue, but i’m still worrying.

Can I ask when everyone had a negative test post MVA/ERCP? I’m 6 days post surgery and it’s as dark as ever on the First response. I just don’t need the worry :(

@VillageFete I didn't test but am now 18 days post ERPC and having ovulation symptoms so I assume I'd be testing negative if I took a test now. My BBT returned to my baseline at 13 days post ERPC so I suspect that the negative would have been from then.

@TheBirdintheCave I just hoped it would be lighter. I have all the “worst case scenario” stuff scrambling my head now.

I will hold off testing until closer to 3 weeks and hope for the best.

I’ve been using ubiquinol since my mc I get it off Amazon it has good reviews x I read it starts with the egg it’s fascinating xxx

@Chocolatebean Ooh I've just looked and you can get some less expensive versions there. It says not to take it when pregnant though so would I have to stop taking it after ovulation just in case?

@VillageFete it took me 4 weeks to get a negative, it just seems to take a while sometimes x

Thanks for your posts @VillageFete, it's interesting to find out more about it. I sometimes think it's a miracle anyone has babies at all considering how many things can go wrong.

I'll keep trying to track ovulation over my next few cycles and see if there are any patterns. It's frustrating my right now that there's no help until I have another miscarriage when it seems like there is a lot of good information out there and simple things that could be done.

@Dragonfly91 Thanks for replying, was this after the surgical management?

Those bloody first responses are so sensitive! It’s stressing me out.

As long as it’s going in the right direction I can cope but I don’t want to keep testing!

@GingleAllTheWay2022 I know, sometimes ignorance is bliss.

My new clinic (abroad) prescribes Clexane and Progesterone injections as standard - just incase. I have had 2 failed embryo transfers abroad, but not with this clinic. I’m hoping if I finally get to transfer then the blood thinners and extra progesterone may help - (This miscarriage was a spontaneous pregnancy and because i’ve MC’ed it’s screwed everything up)

My Consultant in London prescribes progesterone if you consult with her? She might prescribe blood thinners too? It’s £150 for a consultation over Zoom if anyone has suffered multiple miscarriages and wanted to enquire?

I sound like an upper class wanker “My Consultant in London” I’m honestly not upper class, i’m haemorrhaging money I can’t afford and I’m seeing all of these Consultants/Specialists because I can’t face another failed embryo transfer, so apologies if I sound like a knobhead!

@VillageFete yes it was after the surgical management. I had medical management but it failed, and it was four weeks after the surgery that I finally got a negative test. I'm probably the exception rather than the rule, but I wouldn't worry until at least three weeks x