Journey after miscarriage support thread Jan 2023

[Fairylight102]

I wondered if anyone out there would be interested in joining a thread for those who have recently experienced a miscarriage - a place to share how we’re feeling emotionally, physical recovery, becoming ready to try again (for those that want to), and hopefully one day positive stories of successful preganancies.

I’m 32 and recently had a miscarriage at 5-6 weeks of my first pregnancy. I was relieved to have conceived after quite a short time, because I have PCOS and was worried I might struggle to get pregnant.

My miscarriage was about 2 and half weeks ago now, and today is the first day I’ve not had any spotting/bleeding at all, and that has been a relief to feel like my body is moving on from it. I know it’s advisable to do a pregnancy test a few weeks after miscarriage, which is something I’m a bit anxious about doing as I’m fairly sure it will be an emotional thing to do.

Since it happened my sleep pattern and energy levels have been a bit all over the place. Some days I’ve just wanted to sleep all the time, which I think could be a mix of actual physical tiredness and also emotional tiredness/hormonal changes. I was back at work for the first time today, and it was helpful to have something else to focus on and motivate myself for.

I’ve restarted tracking my BBT to see what happens with my cycle returning, though I’m aware it could take a while to get back to normal. My husband and I are both on the same page that we’d like to try again once I’ve had one normal period, so I guess we’ll just see how things go and how we feel when we reach this point.

Sorry this has turned into a longer post than I expected! Anyway, if there’s anyone out there who’s had a similar experience recently and would like a place to share feelings/questions/advice it would be lovely to hear from others.

@YearoftheRabbit23 @Saturnsmoon tjanks so much at first or felt like a total disaster in the scan but then when I spoke to the consultant and midwife they just aren’t bothered and said it’s fine apparently if they are big they can stop implantation but mine isn’t. I told my friend and she laughed as she had a polyp through pregnancy and on the scan photos people used to think the polyp was the baby lol which has made me feel so much better. I have a over phone dr appt today so will get an appt with a consultant and if I’m not pregnant by that time they can remove it and if I am well we can sort it after the baby. Plan made lol.
we all seem to be having a rough time at the minute don’t we on a plus side I was talk to the sonographer and the oldest naturally pregnant lady she scanned was 53 I think they told me as I was panicking as I’m almost 40 lol xxx

I saw the doctor yesterday, signed me off for two weeks as hormones all over the place and I don't want to cry Infront of students I teach! She said she's old fashioned and to wait two cycles before ttc, no chance! I said I'm worried about my age (38 in June) she said the good news is I got pregnant so my 38 year old body is making eggs and my partner has sperm, so she wasn't worried at all, made me feel a little better.

I'm so glad they signed you off! It's awful going back when you're not ready.

I went back on Thursday when my sick note ran out but I was definitely ready to go back. I already feel a bit lighter. I've spent the last 2 weeks in a dressing gown. Work have been wonderful too. I've done very little other than answer emails and chat for the last couple of days.

I'm mildly annoyed because I took am ovulation test today (flo told me I should be ovulating) and it was negative. I'm just annoyed I took one really because we're 'going with the flow' and now I'm twitchy again.

I haven't done my 3 weeks post miscarriage pregnancy test yet so it could be that I'm completely jumping the gun but I was just hoping things were going to happen quickly.

@s14a lots of staff at the hospital told me to just have sex every other day so I thought about not tracking, but I'm not ready to come away from it yet. It reassures me knowing if my hormones are doing the right thing and as we haven't waited for my first period before trying I figure it'll help with dating if we were fortunate enough to fall pregnant straight away after the MC!

I'm glad being back at work is helping and that they're supportive, I work in education so as soon as I go back I won't have a second to think! Most days don't even get chance for a wee! I do feel guilty being off longer.

Are you going to TTC before first period? Can't remember if I've asked you, I got the static smiley today on clearblue, 2 weeks and 1 day after the surgery, such mixed emotions.

@Enigma85 glad you managed to get signed off for a bit longer.

Has anybody here had acupuncture while ttc? I had my first session today which was fine but was told not to do it during my tww which I was a bit surprised by as I’ve seen people online saying they have it during tww to help with implantation. Also didn’t find it very relaxing so not sure it’s going to do much for me, anyway won’t harm I guess.

@Saturnsmoon Yep I'm doing acupuncture right now and also did it while TTC last year, though in both cases it was/is for treating chronic hives. This time round I've explained I'm trying to conceive after a miscarriage. In neither instance has the practitioner said not to try at any point. (Not sure what TWW stands for?)

@YearoftheRabbit23 Two week wait xx

@kookyelephant thanks in which case no one has said no acupuncture during that time either!

@YearoftheRabbit23 thank you for sharing! Yes I googled it after my session and could not find it mentioned/recommended anywhere so find it a bit odd. Might try another practitioner and see what they say.

@Saturnsmoon in my last session with my previous practitioner (she was a bit of a crazy hippie type) she really put me off future sessions by saying that because I'd had a C-section, some vital energy line in my body had been cut and the solution was putting an acupuncture needle in my perineum in my next session!!!! I can't think of anything worse, not only the awkward position that would be required but also how intimate it is and how painful it would be to have a needle there! I googled acupuncture and perineum and couldn't find anything so I wonder if this was her way of getting rid of me as a patient by scaring me off with some made up treatment? Very strange. Anyway I held off contacting her for a follow up session so it worked if that was her strategy!

Anyway my current practitioner is much less "woo woo". I don't think any needles will be suggested to go in my perineum!

Has anyone else ever been told such a thing?!

@YearoftheRabbit23 oh my goodness! That would have had me running for the hills! Glad you found somebody else to go to.

I have to admit to being a bit of a skeptic when it comes to things like acupuncture but figured it was worth a try as unlikely to do any harm.

@Saturnsmoon exactly, it does improve my hives though I haven't yet sustained a long enough course of treatment to see if I can entirely get rid of them. So hopefully it will help with the conception too!

Hi everyone how’s it going? Crikey defo some interesting accupuncture stories. Defo don’t think I’d be letting anyone stick needles in my perenium 😬😬😬. I’ve had time to come to terms with having a polyp, I will ttc whilst waiting to see about getting it removed since the consultant and the top midwife said it was fine however I would rather it was gone. On a fb site someone was told it is 18 months for polyp removal so im just going straight with my vitality insurance, husband has a twist as it will put up our premium but what’s the point of having private health insurance if u dont use it anyway he’s fine and said just go for it.

I’ve decided to add serrapeptase to my vitamins seen a few things it helps fertility so why not lol xxx

It definitely happens. Quick conception after miscarriage. We miscarried on 15th October and by 11th November we had another positive test. They both felt like very different miscarriages though. The first was at 6 weeks and the second at 10 weeks so I feel like they probably happened for different reasons.

We are not trying, not preventing before 1st period. We have dtd but infrequently and not on a schedule. I have done one clearblue but just got an empty circle and then decided that I definitely didn't want to track this month.
I don't even really want to do our miscarriage confirmation pregnancy test. I was due to do it today but the tests haven't arrived so will have to wait 😬

@s14a I'm not bothering doing the two week post surgery test, I couldn't stand it if it was still positive.

Are you not?
That's something to think about. I didn't have surgery, has a mmc which happened whilst waiting for treatment. I suppose I'd just like a negative to make sure that when I get a positive it's a new pregnancy not just residual hcg.

@s14a I'm just going to track CM and temps instead to see when I ovulate. I'll take a test a few weeks after that if I don't get AF first. I currently have no tests in the house and don't want to buy a new box.

I had medical management with my first MMC and it took forever for my tests to be negative. Really hoping I ovulate quicker this time round.

Hello @Fairylight102 ,

I am also 32 and have recently gone through a miscarriage. I was at 10 weeks when I went in for an ultrasound to find out I only had a embronic sac. I was told that I had a blighted ovam, which means the embryo was absorbed because it was no viable. I am still bleeding on and off and it and happen on dec 30. I also had a broken my wrist dec 3, had shingles the following week, and then wrist surgery on dec 14 and flu right after. I was told these were not reason, but i feel like I failed my baby before it even started. I feel horrific inside. I am sorry for your loss. I wish you the best. I am also concerned at my age as well. Older I get the more issues. I have a stepson who is 9 which was difficult to explain it.

@Rozalee So sorry to hear about your loss. I know it’s hard but please try not to blame yourself - it sounds like just bad luck and nothing you did would have caused it.

@Fairylight102 Im worried that it was because on birth control that I lost the embryo. I was planning on getting off bc now. I also had adhd meds I was on not knowing I was pregnant and anxiety meds. Im off of them since I found out. My mom says none of it was my fault. But it feels like it was my fault.

Hi ladies how is everyone I’ve had a few really crappy days it’s weird how they hit all of a sudden isn’t it. My 1st ovulation since my period is due this weekend and it’s made me go a bit crazy I think I’m just so certain it’s not going to work my body still feels so different from the way it did before the MC. We will give it our best shot but I’m really not hopeful. My polyp referral letter to my gp got lost in the post so still not referred for that . I’ve had stupid thrush from all the antibiotics for the retained products that I didn’t actually have so I’m sure that won’t help ttc. Ive bought some pre seed in the hopes that will help maintain my ph long enough for the sperm to swim up there with me having thrush although I’m hoping it’s gone now, see told u I’m going crazy 😜. Love to you all on this awful journey xxx

@Chocolatebean Wishing you all the luck for this cycle! Sorry about the thrush :(

I'm still waiting for the endless brown spotting to cease 🤦🏻‍♀️ It's been eleven days since my surgery now. I've charted my temperature since then and it's still on a downward trend. I suppose I need to wait for it to level out before I can expect ovulation to be round the corner. I hate the waiting. I just want to try again.

I got my thyroid blood results back, all of which were normal. On the vitamin front though I am deficient in vitamin D so I'm taking a super strong version now. They also flagged that my iron levels are insanely high and advised I get that checked out.

Morning @Chocolatebean sorry you've not been feeling great 😔

I've decided I'm probably going to start as soon as possible now! I suppose it hasn't been that long but you always feel like it's a life time when you are waiting and I still haven't got a miscarriage clinic referral letter!

I have a question for you all though, I used to check temp and take LH Tests to check my cycle after trying for 2 years to take a baby me and my partner literally DTD when we need to as sad as that is! The LH Tests I use are just cheapy ones from Amazon and I suppose getting pregnant 3 times last year I'm obviously not too far off but is there better ovulation tests to try like clear blue? Or is there any other tips anyone can give xx

@Chocolatebean urgh sorry about the thrush and everything else, I always get thrush on antibiotics too.

Good news is I got my period over the weekend, 3 weeks and 3 days after the surgery, so I'm hopefully for period 2 in mid-Feb and then will get straight on the case of TTC. Will also start taking folic acid again soon.

Hello, its so refreshing to hear this. Suffered 4 miscarriages last year, tried over Christmas & had strong preg symptoms last week but my period arrived thjs week so must have all been in my head. My partner is 44 this year & im 37, we would have loved a shorter age gap for our 6 year old but wasnt meant to be. Not ready to give up but not sure what else to try. Good luck to us all 🤞