Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 5. ALL welcome!

[Sunbird24]

Previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/4190003-Support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-MC-MMC-Thread-4-ALL-welcome

Oh @Artisticpiglet3 how worrying! Will keep everything crossed for you for the scan, but plenty of women seem to have random bleeding and still go to full term

Hi May I join for support.

I went for a private scan a few days ago. Should of been 8+4 and baby measured 6+1 but with a heart beat. But the dates don’t match up at all.
I am seeing EPU today. And not sure if there will still be a HB or not. But I’ve had light spotting and am expecting the baby wil lose its HB over the next week or so at least as it obviously is not growing right.
100% on my dates. Positive pregnancy test 5.5 weeks ago so can’t be only 6 weeks pregnant.

How long for others did EPU leave between a re-scan? I see ppl mentioning 2 weeks and it just feels like torture to wait 2 weeks to be able to have the rest over with. When you know what the outcome will be 😞

We tried for almost a year for this baby. And I just feel at a loss. This was my second DC. But due to health issues would of been a bigger age gap than expected. And now it’s not even happening 😭

@Indianna2006 so so sorry to hear. I've just gone through the very same thing in last few days. When I went into EPU the heart had stopped within two days and to be honest it was a bit of relief that it wasn't dragged out. Im in Ireland so may be different but they were happy to confirm there and then and we didn't have to go back for another scan. I was encouraged to do the medical management route by taking the tablets.
I wish you all the best at your appointment and if you need a listening ear I am here...

@BabyGally22 did you have a private scan they took as proof? I’m not sure they agree for that that here. I think the NHS like to have seen themselves and then reconfirm. But I can only see.

Was only 2/3 days ago I was scanned so not sure if I expect to see heartbeat or not. But it looked abnormal as well. Like I think the yolk sac was very large which suggests poor outcome and usually chromosomal abnormalities. So I’m expecting the worst. Just don’t know how long it will take.

All the waiting to be able to get medical management or see if you’re body catches up is just torture!

@Indianna2006 yes it is torture we had a two week wait between being told there's nothing there, to finding a heartbeat to then going back and no heartbeat, a proper rollercoaster so hence the relief to get an answer. We did have a private early scan where heartbeat had declined from time of EPU scan but I didn't need to even tell EPU because once the heart beat had stopped for their scan and like you was measuring behind they were happy to confirm then. For you, I hope you get similar because the knowing it's over without the final closure of having the miscarriage is cruel.

@BabyGally22 oh I see yes. I guess as this is my first scan with EPU though. If there is no heartbeat. They won’t of seen it with one. So I suspect will want me to go back to confirm in few weeks still no heart beat. Im not sure.

Even though if there is no heart beat today I know it’s gone.

If there is a heartbeat though and dates are still so wrong. That can only end in one scenario in my head. So it’s then a case of waiting or expecting the heart to stop at some point 😞

Awful awful waiting game

Hi everyone, I went to my 8 week early scan yesterday and found out I was only measuring at 5-6 weeks with no heartbeat detected. I was told to come back in a week because I may have got my dates wrong etc but I’m 100% sure I’ve not as I was testing from approx 12dpo so that means I would’ve tested positive before I even conceived if that makes sense. So now I’m in limbo because I know I’ve lost the baby but it’s not come out, and I’ve technically not had it confirmed. I cried all the way home from the scan and have cried this morning.
Not really sure what will happen next, I’m just hoping it passes naturally. This is my first pregnancy and we weren’t actively trying but I feel like everything has changed since finding out and now I feel like it’s supposed to just change back. I feel like a failure. So many emotions.
Not sure what happens next?

@Indianna2006 yes it is. I'm sorry there is no easier way in our situations.... the only smal tiny positive that I felt I did have some time to process it emotionally so once the physical side of things started I did feel I was half way through the ordeal if that makes sense.... mind yourself, get yourself some treats for later and have a cuddle night, il be thinking about you, take care xxxxx

Also I still have pregnancy sickness :(

@BabyGally22 thank you. Yes you’re right. I am already procressing it before I’ve even gone today. If I have to wait 2 weeks for another scan and to see what my body does. It is what it is.

@boringperson123 very sorry. Basically same as me but I do have a hb. But measuring 2 weeks out. And I again 100% know my dates. Feels so cruel.
Was your early scan private? If it was I suggest contacting EPU as they will need to scan you as if your body doesn’t do anything by itself. Only they can assist you. But they will want to confirm themselves I believe. Such a rubbish situation to be in.
I hoped it see a 8 week wriggly baby too. And knew it was far too small.

@BabyGally22

EPU confirmed this morning it’s a failed pregnancy. No heart beat. And sac measuring different to fetal pole.

I am due back next week to rescanned as they have to do do for guidelines. But least it’s only a week. And if nothing happened in that week. I can select medical management if I wish.

@Indianna2006 I'm so sorry xxxxx
It's a tough time so be kind to yourself ❤️

Really sorry for your loss. Take time to cry and be kind to yourself xxx

Everything was ok. Still can't shake the worry but everything's fine for now x

Hello new member here..

I had a miscarriage at 11 weeks on 3 March after finding blood on a routine toilet visit.
It will be 6 weeks post mc on Thursday and I feel like it could be 6 months the way each day drags on. All I think about our is my mc and wanting to conceive again. I am blessed with 3 other children one of which has special needs but this has still hit me hard. I never thought it could happen to me but I guess nobody ever does.
I have a great support system in my friends and husband but it’s not the same. I just feel so alone in my thoughts being consumed with these thoughts.
I had been testing positive until Friday last week when my first period started with three days spotting followed by a normalish period with clots. That really played with my emotions and I thought I was dealing ok but now on say 8 (or day 11 if counting spotting) and it feels like this period will never end.

Sorry for all your losses and it’s sad that something so traumatic is bringing us together. 💔

@Artisticpiglet3 that’s great news, hopefully everything stays ok. 🤞

I’m really sorry to see more new ladies on the thread, but I hope you all find something here that helps you

May I ask what have you all been doing to get through this? I can’t really stop crying since had the procedure 2 weeks ago and I am really struggling with the emotions. I feel like my body has failed me and I am so scared that it might happen again, I don’t know how to get through this

Your hormones will still be all over the place @Annapolis35, don’t worry - that’s a normal reaction and it will get better with time. For me I guess the hope eventually outweighed the fear. If I didn’t try again I wouldn’t have another loss, but then I also definitely had no chance of success either. Have you been able to get any counselling or support? If not I would recommend giving either the Tommys or Miscarriage Association helplines a call if you can, they’re meant to be good.

@Annapolis35 struggling with emotions is totally expected and it’s only been two weeks so it’s still very raw and your body will be going through a lot not to mention the confused hormones to top it off.
Be kind to yourself and cry when you need to and in time it does get better. I’m almost 6 weeks and I still cry about it but like the post above says hope is outweighing my fear and helping me through this X

Thank you both @MooBugz and @Sunbird24. I have accessed counseling through my GP and spoken to Tommy’s who were really helpful. It is just going to take some time, and you are both right, hope will eventually outwin the fear once it is a bit less raw. I never thought this would be so difficult.

@Sunbird24 thanks for the well wishes! Had my scan today all has passed naturally which I’m very grateful for. Just waiting now for negative test to start trying again 🤞🏻

Could anyone help me whose been in for surgery as a day patient or in the day care unit inpatient for medical management.

Did you have to do PCR before procedure to prove you were covid free?

Thanks

Hi @Indianna2006, yes, with the last one I had the pcr on Saturday morning and isolated until I went to hospital on the Tuesday for my procedure (one of the other women due to have surgery tested positive so had to rebook). The one before I had a longer wait, so was offered a choice to either isolate for 7 days without testing, or test and isolate for 3 days. Hope you’re ok

Hi everyone. I hope this is an ok place to join for talking about my partner's recent MMC. We recently sadly discovered we had unfortunately lost the pregnancy at about 8 weeks during a scan at 10 weeks following some bright bleeding. This was a terrible suprise and dissapointment. We are lucky enough to have a two year old daughter, but we're dealing with this loss and trying to ready ourselves for what's to come.

It's now about a week following this scan and she has opted - at least to begin - with expectant management. She hasn't begun to bleed or pass the pregnancy yet, and she's now anxious about the feelings she is experiencing and whether this similar to anyone else's experiences.

She's been having something she describes as a 'burning' sensation, more than the pain she usually experiences during period cramping, but nothing yet approaching contraction-type pain. She is autistic, so the waiting is extremely difficult for her - so any advice about what she might be experiencing soon would be very comforting to her. Thank you so much if anyone is able to share anything in terms of the physics symptoms they experienced. I'm so sorry to everyone for their losses.x

Hi @Nic860, so sorry for your loss The burning feeling isn’t something I’ve experienced, but it could be worth giving 111 a ring to get a call back from a doctor if you’re worried. When my body has managed to start on its own it’s been nearly 2 weeks after the scan, have you & your partner been told how long you need to wait before they’ll intervene either medically or surgically?