Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 2. ALL welcome!

[AMS19]

Hi ladies

This thread is open for EVERYONE. To discuss the highs, lows, emotions, and experiences of us all going through our miscarriage journey. Together we will get through this!

Previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/4119053-Support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-MC-MMC?pg=1

To my incredible strong warriors...I cannot believe we filled a thread! We've got this ladies ❤
@DMT1982
@Scottishskifun
@glowingtwig
@mia2201
@Redfoxinthesnow
@Seasalt1984
@laurat94
@tamsin424
@cocoloco88
@SuzieDeLaTour
@Cordial11
@seasalt1984
@thehotelcalifornia
@TheDaydreamBelievers
@Pettylamby
@Lililou
@Enola41
@CocoLoco88
@Nicolamac1
@Sleeeeeepy
@Mellous
@Nicolamac1
@Semla
@Seasidestarfruit
@mummydoingamasters
@elm7
@MrsD1992
@CookieMonster3001
@Dryshampoo32

Sincere apologies for missing anyone xx

@Jam291 yeah you'll find a link the our first thread at the start on this thread. Her experience was pretty much identical. Think it was around the start of Jan. And she has been so brave! And so have you. Honestly between all of us nothing you say will be new, one of us would have done it or thought it!
I would definitely get the reassurance. Most people go on to worry about retained tissue so would be great to get clarification you're all clear. You won't be wasting anyone's time at all ❤

@Jam291 hi yes the same thing happened to me. I was told MMC at 14 weeks baby had stopped at 9weeks I was due for surgery but miscarried at home also in the shower (I wanted some pain relief).
My baby wasn't in the sac and was a bit bigger at 9 weeks but yes I held my baby and said goodbye. I ended up in the trauma unit due to blood loss and had to have a procedure to stop it. My DH took the baby into the unit after I got home so baby was cremated with pregnancy tissue.

It's been very tough due to fatigue from blood loss and also have some issues sleeping etc but I'm slowly improving.

I'm sorry your also going through it keep an eye on your bleeding I lost a lot of blood and should have called the unit sooner.

@Scottishskifun I didn't want to tag you and put any pressure on but so glad you reached out given you have the same experience

Oh @Scottishskifun 💞🙁🙁. I know how that feels I MMC at 13 weeks baby had passed at 9.5 weeks, I was also scheduled to go into hospital but ended up passing it walking down the hospital corridor and ran into the nearest toilet. I feel you, so sorry to hear about your blood loss, as if it’s not hard enough....
So far, my bleeding is ok, ‘normal’ period type bit drippy when in the loo which I think is fine?
Can I ask what you would say would be too much? If you don’t mind.
Sorry to hear you are having trouble sleeping aswell. Is your partner supportive? 💞
I’ve been feeling really dizzy seen stars earlier from getting up too quickly so will take it easy, won’t lie I’ve hardly eaten or drank today either as been feeling all the emotions.
I’m about to tuck into the chocolate cake with ice cream and light a candle 💞 xxx @AMS19 xxx

@Jam291 they say more than 2 pads in an hour, I bled through 3 maternity pads in an hour at home and had very large clots as well (palm to hand sized). I called the unit because I was O- and when they asked me about the bleeding I was on the 5th maternity pad. They wanted to send an ambulance I got my DH to drive though as I didn't want to be on my own. By the time I had the procedure to remove the clot from my cervix I had gone through 12 maternity pads in total and 2 bed sheet changes at the hospital.

Definitely keep your fluids up I know what you mean though I wasn't able to eat for 3 days. Just take it slowly and easy.

My husband is very supportive and he has been fantastic looking after our toddler. I'm being monitored by the GP as showing a few signs of PTSD which I'm hoping will subside.
I'm just taking each day as it comes it's the only thing any of us can do.

Oh wow, how scary for you. Thankyou for telling me this, it’s so helpful. I think with ‘early’ miscarriage there isn’t that much information around and to speak to people is so helpful. I’ve had a few clots but around the size of a 10p, but will keep an eye. Was your partner allowed in hospital with you?
I had the early scan on Tuesday and I had to go alone, and the scan I got this Tuesday I have to go alone and I really don’t want to be alone- due to cornavirus. So glad to hear your partner is supportive💞💞

My husband wasn't with me for the scan but was with me the whole time through the trauma unit and allowed to stay when I was being monitored after the procedure as well.
I'm in North Scotland so I think the rules are a bit different.

I found the midwife to be amazing despite me finding out on my own. It's not the same for everyone on this thread but my experience up here is that they are going the extra mile to be supportive. Hopefully your hospital is the same. I wasn't given a scan after because I had been in hospital and they had checked (I was also prepped for emergency surgery incase the procedure didn't work).

@Jam291 I'm sorry you're going through this again. I'm glad that you got to see your baby and say your goodbyes. I don't think it's strange. Before we found out mine was ectopic, I passed tissue in the bath, I washed off the blood trying to look for signs of a foetus.

@Jam291 morning. Hope you managed to get some sleep and are doing the best you can be xx

Thankyou all.
@AMS19 I actually slept really well, I think it was like an almost pass out type of sleep, also my 2 year old doesn’t sleep great so when he does sleep through I manage to😃.
I just had a horrible gut feeling, I know you shouldn’t go by these but like the ClearBlue weeks indicator went up to 2-3 but I never got a 3+ , yet saw the heartbeat, and then they dated me 5 days behind, then I was spotting for days that got heavier, so I feel like I was ‘prepared’ for badness, still absolutely heart breaking.

Hope everyone is ok xx

@Jam291 good to hear. Sleep is a great healer!
I was the same. My hcg levels were great, but baby was always measuring a week behind. At 6+6 it measured 6 exactly. So even though it had a heartbeat I was 100% sure on dates and knew it wasn't quite right. So I had a gut feeling. But my symptoms got stronger so tried to brush it off. Had no spotting or bleeding at all. Then a scan at 9+5 confirmed a mmc. Baby most likely died a couple of days after the scan with the heartbeat. So all the stronger symptoms meant nothing. The only sign I have is my heart rate fell the day I probably miscarried, looking back you can clearly see it. Very sad!

Morning all

Stupidly took a preg test this morning (13 days post surgery) and it was glaringly positive! Feeling a bit deflated. I know it was probably too soon to test but I really hoped it would be almost negative :(.

Hope everyone is ok. Xxx

@AMS19
That was the same with my MMC, suffered HG, was even sick the morning of the scan and then to be told baby had no heartbeat thought it was so cruel. This time I had no sickness which is weird as every time I’ve been pregnant I’ve suffered HG. It’s weird how it now writing it down it appears so obvious but when you are living it you try and make it not seem so? If that makes sense. Life is so precious really 💞💞.

@Mellous sorry to hear that, when are you recommended to test? I was going to test today just to see what’s going on with my hormone levels but I might try and save myself some heart ache. 💞
I’m ok Thankyou, taken these two days off work as I feel I need to physically and mentally recover a little before I go back.
How are you?
Xx

@Jam291 the hospital told me to wait 3 weeks and then take a test so I definitely tested too soon but I was just really hoping for it to be negative already. I won’t test for another week or so now.

Yes take all the time you need. I really struggled to do anything after my surgery but I found getting back into work a welcome distraction, although I can work from home. I don’t think I’d have gone back straight after if I couldn’t. Xx

@Mellous I'm sorry. But if you makes you feel better mine was blaring a week ago and it now hardly there. I tested with a FRER this morning which obviously had a line but quite light and my 10mlU strips are becoming squinters. So another week or so and you'll probably see a big difference 😊

@Jam291 It's so hard to know what we should have known or felt isn't it. But we are here today and have to move on from here. Have both your miscarriages been since your little boy? Or did you say he was in-between?

Test is so much lighter today than two days ago!! I'm 11 days post-MVA today. It's made me feel a lot more positive that I'm moving in the right direction.

We made pizza for dinner last night and ordered in cocktails, it's the first time I've felt 'normal' in a long time! Even put make up and real clothes on!!

For the past 4 days now I've only had tiny amounts of pink, and now brown, CM. So that's another great step in the right direction!

@Jam291 I'm so sorry for your losses, but thank you for sharing your story and coming to join us!

@Mellous I'm sorry you're still getting strong positives. And I'm sorry if you make any comparisons with my tests. I shouldn't be testing yet either! I'm just too impatient and too addicted to peeing on sticks. I really find doing one every two days helps me keep track of the line growing fainter and it really makes me feel better.

@LauraT94 your cocktail party looks amazing!!! Love this. So nice to have a but of normality isn't even, especially when we can't even go out! Tests are definitely moving in the right direction too much is fab xx

@AMS19 I had a MMC then my little boy and now a MC.

@LauraT94 Thankyou for that picture of tests, handy to see. Those cocktails look amazing 🤩 .
Think il test in a couple days.
So far my bleeding now is only a light period type. I am going to go to my EPU appointment on Tuesday to ensure no tissue remains as such. I’m going to test in a couple days. I only have IC’s sensitive so will likely show positive won’t they for a while due to being sensitive.

Xx

Ladies can I ask how long you all took or are taking off work? X

@LauraT94 aw that sounds like a fab evening! I had a couple of gins last night. Woke up this morning absolutely knackered!! It’s been so long since I’ve had a drink haha.

When was your Mc lovely? Those tests are definitely getting lighter!! I’ve ordered some cheap ones off Amazon so I can see the lines go lighter. This mornings was a frer so probably ultra sensitive anyways xx

@AMS19 it was so good to let my hair down a bit!! We're going to order some more cocktails from the same place for next Saturday too - we figured if we're lucky enough to get pregnant right away then we may as well make the most of drinking together while we can 😂 Xx

@Jam291 yes if they're sensitive you might be best waiting a little while as they will show a strong positive for a little while longer xx

@Ralala I've been off work for about 5 weeks now! Though the past week (and next week) is due to isolating as I was exposed to Covid in the hospital. Take as much time as you need!

@Mellous ah thank you! Yes I'm exhausted from it too 😂 I had my MVA (surgical removal whilst awake) on Thursday 14th (so 11 days ago). Yes the FRERs are 6mIU and are one of the most sensitive tests! The ones I'm using are 25mIU Wondfo cheapies, so a lot less sensitive. When I get a negative on these I'll move onto some 10mIU cheapies I have. And then finally hope for a negative on an FRER! Xx

@Ralala I was going to ask the same about work etc. With my first MMC I was off for two weeks, and I felt ready to go back. I’m off this week, think I’ll be ready to go back by next Sunday but I’m not going to rush as such and just see how I am feeling. As I know it was only yesterday but my bleeding has really lightened up, I haven’t really bled heavy as such, but I think because I’ve been bleeding for a week that I’ve gradually lost blood, and then last night was the worst part so now I hope it stays like this light: I just plan to see how it goes xxx

@Ralala @Jam291 I didn't take anytime off work. Mine happened over Christmas/NYE so I ended up having 4 days off post the MVA because of how holiday fell but declined a sick note. Mainly because I am still working from home full time and quite liked the distraction. Would have taken time off if I had had to face people though

@LauraT94 definitely!! My new rule is going to be drink what I want in the first half of my cycle and go tee total in the second half!

I feel like my emotions are coming in waves, one minute I’m fine, the next I’m crying, then completely fine. 🙁
Cruel thing is, although I never had sickness as such, I’ve been feeling sick and stuff today, I’m guessing it’s shock and everything but I feel like it’s torture.

My job is patient facing in their own homes so there is no way I could have gone today.

Hope everyone has had a lovely Sunday, have you had snow? We’ve had nothing but rain xx

@jam291 I'm the same. Some days I'm excited and focused on trying again and being pregnant again. Other days I feel so incredibly sad and down. Every day is a bit better but some days and worse than others!
We had some snow this morning but now rain. Where are you? Xx