Periods after medical miscarriage

[Wils85]

Hi, I think I'm about to go insane! I underwent a medical miscarriage after discovering a MMC on 08th July, I was 9 weeks by my dates but the sac was around 7 weeks. I eventually miscarried on the 17th July and got a negative PG test on 09th August.

My period showed its head on the evening of 16th August but literally for 24hrs!! I have had nothing since until yesterday evening when I had some brown spotting and again today some pinky brown spotting on wiping!

I'm so confused as to what my body is doing and I feel so out of control. I understood the first period after a miscarriage would be normal flow or heavier, but this has been practically none existent. Has anyone else had a similar experience? This MC was my second PG, the first ended in TFMR back in November at 15 weeks 😥 I just want to know when we can TTC again as I am 35 at Christmas and getting panicky about getting older!!

Any words of wisdom ladies? It's really starting to get to me xx

@Wils85 im just telling myself it will happen when it happens, my cycle and ovulation has been all over the place since my MC so felt like I had to track. I'm the same I was desperately trying to hit 12 weeks by Xmas but obviously that didn't happen. I do have to say my month off has been well needed, im tempted to maybe just try and keep the pressure off and just have sex when we want it to no when I'm ovulating because mentally iv felt so much better. Hopefully your month off is as good as mine has been so far. Think we just need to relax and enjoy ourselves for once haha

@Cornflake24 I'm so glad to hear you say your month off has worked well for you. I'm still apprehensive but like you say, we can't be ruled by it, it will happen when it happens. We know we can do it (as annoyed as I get when others say that to me).

We defo need to relax and go with the flow, easier said then done, especially in this crazy world we are living in at the moment

Hi @Wils85 and @Cornflake24 can I join this thread? Sorry to hear about your losses. I had an MMC and ERPC in July. Got a negative pregnancy test 2 weeks after the ERPC and then periods returned about 4 weeks after that but have been much lighter than usual, don't think that's normal - although October period was heavier so maybe that's a good sign. Cycles have been slightly longer too. DH and I have been TTC again since end of July and I think I am currently 1DPO. Feeling disheartened though as everyone around me is announcing pregnancies, keep thinking I should be nearly 8 months by now x

@StEmilion👋🏻 of course you can join, welcome! ❤️

I'm so very sorry to hear about your MMC, sounds as though you are on the same time line as @Cornflake24 and I. Was it your first PG?

It's so hard and trying to get to grips with what your body is doing afterwards is even harder, especially when all you want is to be PG it varies from woman to woman as to how long it takes to settle back down, and of course, how far along in your pregnancy you were. My cycle seems to be back (I was 9 weeks by my dates when they found the MMC) but my periods seem shorter than normal, but then they always have been short. I'm going to see what next month brings and then maybe speak to someone.

1 DPO? Ah the delightful two week wait is upon you. Try not to stress and symptom spot, I know it's easier said than done. Remember, it's still really early days. After our TFMR last November it took us 5/6months to catch on again. As you may have read, we are currently having a month off as I think everything this last 12 months has gotten on top of me. I feel lighter and calmer for it to be honest. Obvs we will still do what couples do, but without the added pressure of ovulation tests and fertile periods. I'm a little apprehensive if I let myself think about it, I'm not getting any younger. But its needed, else I don't quite know where my mind would be at!

I'm with you, a girl in our group announced her PG the week we had the miscarriage. I should be 6months now, if life were fair I should have an almost 6month old 😥. We have to try not to think like that, though it's bloody hard not to, especially at the moment when there seems to be so little to look forward to and every woman and her cat are announcing pregnancies.

Always here to listen or ask questions. There are some amazing threads on Mumsnet with some really handy information. I've found it really comforting, especially this thread with @cornflake24 and having someone on the same path as me xxx

Welcome @StEmilion this has basically just been the two of us discussing each month so nice to have some other people, as @Wils85 said its been a massive comfort having someone who has been there completely understand it all!

I took this month off trying to but I havent regulated yet so still tracked my ovulation and ended up with 9 high days before peak, tried a new ovulation reader and got a zero, so fairly sure my old one was faulty haha one way to take a month off I guess haha.

I found out in July at my 12 week scan and it feels like a lifetime ago but I can still relieve every word, every pause and visalise the scan picture. In future im not looking until I hear a heartbeat!

We are always here for a chat and nothing is really off-limits haha

I feel you @Cornflake24 especially as I was alone because of the restrictions. If I let myself I can go right back there and feel it all over again 😪

Absolutely nothing off limits @StEmilion I'm certainly no prude, or shy. Can't be in this situation really can we? Let's face it when we get PG and we have doctors and midwives prodding and poking we lose all dignity 😂 xxx

Thanks both! I wish I'd seen this sooner because I've struggled a bit emotionally. Thought I was feeling better over the last month or so but then someone close to me (who knew what happened) made a big deal of her announcement and it brought everything back. I know what you mean about reliving the scan.

Hope your month off will enable you both to relax a bit and treat yourselves. I should probably do the same but I'm 36 and already have 1 DC (2.5) and so every month that passes I'm older and there's a bigger age gap! It took 3 years of on/off TTC to get DC1.

Where are you both in your cycles? AF due for me around the 25th. X

Ps I had issues with tearing/ pelvic floor after DC1 so definitely no dignity left 😂

Bless you @StEmilion I feel you, I haven't any children yet and I'm 35 at New Year and the body clock ticking is SO loud! I take faith in all these celebs still having babies in their early 40s. Not that I want to be in my wallet 40s when it finally happens!! But then the little cynic in me says "but they may have had help". It's such a rollercoaster this process.

I'm on CD7 so I'll be fertile a week today-ish. Period will be due first week in December. Like I say we're aren't actively trying this month, so watch this space!

Keep us posted with how you get on 👍🏻 xx

Its a rubbish time, i ended up seeinga therapist and it helped so much!
I'm 32 with no children and yes the constant tick tock gets louder with every day! Haha. I was very lucky one of my friends has previously miscarriaged and now was a 3 week old! My other friend has a 1 week old, another friend due in march and my cousin is 30 weeks with her triplets! Its weird though those who were pregnant before my MC im fine with but hearing about people getting pregnant after really hits me! I also have a friend who is 40 going through IVF so babies are very much discussed in my friend group.

My period is due 23rd so not to far away but we weren't really trying, we did have sex so who knows but im not sure we will go back to how we were, it was like a job, just get the task done every day on ovulation and taking the pressure off this month has been amazing! Feel like we are back to our old selfs again and not just getting the job done so to speak haha

Luckily I was still seeing the therapist through OH at work following the TFMR last year. I'm still seeing her now and it's been a massive help. I'm lucky to have that option through work.

See, my best friend, who had her DS a month ago, I've been fine with. She told me before we were even pregnant. It hurt massively as we were 5 months post TFMR and TTC again. But she's such a special person, I can talk to her about babies all day long. Another friend, through work, who I love the bones of, just had her baby a few days ago and I've struggled to speak to her about babies the whole way through her pregnancy. I can't explain why, it's weird isn't it?

I just feel like the whole world is getting pregnant or giving birth at the moment and it does get to me if I let it. Which is often at the moment, what with WFH and lockdown. I love my home and where we live but goodness me I'm so done! Never thought I'd say it but I miss the office 😂

Its hard not to feel really hard done by and my Sarah from Labyrinth side comes out (I hope you get the reference?) sometimes and everything is "so unfair".

I'm keeping all my fingers crossed that a relaxed month will do the trick for you @Cornflake24 and for us too 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻 they say too much pressure can be counter productive, so it certainly can't hurt. It's nice just to enjoy being with each other again. Xxx

Fingers and toes crossed!

Argh literally just another announcement!

@Wils85 I know what you mean. Seems to hurt more when it's some people and less for others.

I'm so not into this lockdown either. Thinking of watching some meditation videos on YouTube to try and chill out! 😂

Good luck @Cornflake24

@StEmilion worth a try! Comes in waves for me some days im great and others I fall apart, all just takes time I guess. We are here if you need a chat/vent

@Wils85 it happened! I pray this is your month!

@Cornflake24 oh my goodness!! I'm crying! Oh my darling, I'm so very happy for you 🥳🥰 sending you so much love. Congratulations!!! X

@Wils85 thanks so much! I know it will come with a wince of pain for you but fingers crossed this is your month too.

I just burst into tears by the time my husband came in he was like omg why are you so upset ot will happen for us, couldn't speak so just chucked test at him haha

@Cornflake24 bless you for understanding that. It did, but I am so so happy for you. Like we've said before, it will happen and it has happened for you. Please please keep in touch on your journey and I will do the same. I've been grateful for you support these last few months xxx

@Cornflake24 poor hubby 😂 they never know what to expect from us do they?

@Wils85 same while iv never met you i feel like iv made a real friend

@Cornflake24 ditto lovely xxx

@Cornflake24 huge congratulations 😊🎉

@stemilion fingers crossed its successful this time

Hi ladies I've just come across this thread as unfortunately I'm going through a difficult time. Found out we were pregnant with our first baby and went for a 6 week scan this week after some spotting and now I am currently going through a MC. I feel devastated and just longing to be pregnant again but also terrified about this happening again.

@Nellie5115 I'm sorry you're going through this, it's so heartbreaking. Take some time to cry, eat chocolate, watch tv or read crappy magazines. Can you take some time off work?xx