First Pregnancy Missed Miscarriage (Part III)

[sadtoday21]

Hi ladies! Our last thread was automatically closed (again) because we reached the 1,000 post limit (twice!). I was hoping we would be able to start a new thread called First Pregnancy Post-MMC, but unfortunately we are not all quite there yet (BUT some of us are!! congrats!!!). I know we will all be pregnant someday soon and that this will end up being a lucky thread! In the meantime, I hope you will all join me as we continue on this journey together. You have all been an invaluable source of inspiration, support, and kindness for me and I want to thank you for making me feel less alone in this. This thread and the ladies on it have been a source of inspiration for me, which is why I created this blog to help other women find information and support after miscarriage: mcandbeyond.weebly.com/

About me, for any newcomers: 31 years old, first pregnancy ended in an MMC in February at 12 weeks (baby passed at nine), D&C the next day, found out five weeks later that it was a partial molar pregnancy and had follow-up with CX hospital until mid-May. Second early MC in April (we weren't supposed to be getting pregnant because of the molar, but didn't know about it at the time). Now TTC again nearly four months after the first MMC and so so ready for a baby!

@MrsMGE @Amanda81 I’m heading off to Sorrento and just can’t wait! We have trips to the amalfi coast, Pompeii and Naples booker ♥️♥️♥️ something to aim towards!

@Kiki061190 Oh this is where we went for our honeymoon, loved it! Definitely make trips to Positano, Capri & Ischia ❤️

I have now fell in love with Cinque Terre and Verona after we've been there. What a country ❤️

@MrsMGE thanks for the tips! Will have a look ♥️♥️♥️ Can’t wait for some time away!

No worries 😊 Girls, it's my 5th day in a row without getting upset about losing the baby. I think about it daily, but I'm proud that I've gone about my life without being overwhelmed with grief for so long - first time since the grief started. Little victories, eh 😊 Maybe there is a light somewhere at the end of this road.

Feeling so bloated and plump today, my face is covered in spots and I've eaten half a pack of Cadbury buttons last night (after I was good all day, epic fail). Still no AF! I wish it finally came as I feel like I'm bursting out of my clothes and have nothing to wear!

@MrsMGE I feel the same! Have literally forgot about it all the last few days and I haven’t thought about cycle days etc ♥️ Small steps ♥️

😊

Well, today it's been one of those days where you swing between feeling like you wanna kill yourself, your clients or your colleagues, just nothing is right and people get right on your nerves. I used to really struggle with tolerating people being lazy /difficult/incompetent, you get the gist. After the MC I've become more forgiving, but today they've all pushed the wrong buttons and I've snapped. And strangely, whilst snapping isn't a good thing, I am actually kind of happy, because it might just be another symptom of coming back to my normal, feisty self. Or another symptom of AF - that would be a classic!
Anyway, I'm going to chill and watch some Love Island, feel like I need to switch off my brain 😂

Hope your week is going good girls xxx

Hi ladies, looking for some advice! Now I know it's expected to have weird first cycle after MC but I'm confused!!

I just had what I thought was my period for 2 days but it was really quite light and 3 days earlier than expected. Today I've had EWCM?!

Attaching my charts - again I don't think I actually O'd on my last cycle since my MC despite what FF said...Do you think I am actually still on the same cycle and I'm Oing now?! I always have EWCM when O and didn't think you had it at other points of the cycle! Maybe my period wasn't really a period..or maybe I'm just overthinking it all!!

Thank you! Xx

Hey @BabyPending - it looks like FF isn't sure either due to the dashed crosshairs. You have all of open circles in your chart which suggests you aren't taking your temps at roughly the same time each day??? If so, this can skew your chart up and give false readings.

No matter about the temps, you've had a light bleed. How light was light? I see that you've had spotting also. This could be a sign of your body gearing up to ovulate, or could indeed be a light AF. Are you using ovulation sticks? The presence of EWCM is a sign of ovulation, so I wouldn't rule it out. If you took out the AF details from FF, what does it do to your chart? You can always put them back in later.

Hi @Amanda81 thank you for your message. I've taken out what I thought was AF (good idea) and my chart looks like this! Trying not to go into too much detail I had a 1.5 - 2 days of "AF" mostly very dark brown but there was also some dark red but all enough to need tampax but only really needed like 2 tampax spread over 2 days! After not needing tampax anymore there was one incident of bright bright red but only when I wiped then that was it! So strange!

Unfortunately I don't use ovulation sticks. I FINALLY have my BFN since mc so maybe now my body is trying to ovulate again now I have no hcg left? Sorry I know I can just wait but I was gearing myself up for TTC soon but now I'm not sure it was an AF... in that case I'm still on my first cycle and I should be careful with BDing

Xx

@BabyPending I agree with @Amanda81 - looks like you may not have Od just yet. It is possible to have EWCM after or before AF though, but usually not for more than a day. Fx this is O for you!

Hi everyone. I thought I'd just pop back quickly with an update.

I'm currently in my hotel room in London after my hysteroscopy to treat Asherman's. I feel vindicated that I was right about having AS after how dismissive my GP was but at the same time I didn't want to be right. Unfortunately there was a lot of scarring and I won't know for a few weeks if my fertility can be restored. I'm on lots of hormones etc to try and prevent any re-scarring and to help the lining heal.

I hope everyone on here is as well as possible at whatever stage of the journey you're at. I have really missed having you all to talk to every day and will never forget how you were all there for me when I felt my most alone. ❤️

@sadtoday21 massive congratulations on your pregnancy!! You've been through so much and deserve every happiness xxx

I have been thinking of you @AnnaMC214 I’m really glad you’ve been able to move forwards with the diagnosis and treatment. Everything crossed for your recovery

Thanks for everyone’s kind words earlier, I cannot say these things out loud to anyone, not even DH so it’s really helpful to have a place to vent x x

@AnnaMC214 it’s so lovely to see you on here again, I was just thinking about you the other day and wondering how you were. I’m so very sorry to hear that you were right about the AS, you definitely knew what was going on in your body even if no one else would listen. Do you think that the first doctor didn’t perform the D&C correctly? I don’t know that much about AS, but I can only imagine the pain you must be going through with the trauma of another surgery after all this time. Hopefully the issue has been corrected now and your lining can heal and all fertility will return. Do you have a good support network there for you at the hospital? You can always come here and vent anytime you need to talk, we all care about you and are routing for you! Best wishes for a speedy recovery and thanks also very much for your warm wishes too. All we can do is take one day at a time and not give up hope, no matter how dark it may seem at times. Thinking of you xxx.

Hope you are doing ok too @bananamonkey and that you get some answers soon. Sending hugs!

It's so nice to catch up with you all. Even though our circumstances are different now I know you all understand the thoughts and emotions that come with all this stuff.

@bananamonkey thank you. I'm sorry to hear that you're having a tough time of it too at the moment. I know how painful waiting for answers can be. I really hope you have a chance to move forward soon. xx

@sadtoday21 thank you for your lovely words. This has honestly been the worst 6 months of my life and you ladies have been one of the few glimmers of light. It's likely that my erpc was overly aggressive which would explain why I had a lot of bleeding and quite a long recovery time. I feel angry that they've potentially destroyed my ability to conceive but what's done is done. If the damage is too great then the endometrium loses its ability to regenerate. There's nothing to do now but wait to see if that's the case but my doctor's the best in the country at treating AS so at least I can feel we've given it the best possible shot. I can't quite believe sometimes that this is the situation we find ourselves in but there's nothing to do but keep on keeping on. xx

@AnnaMC214 I'm so sorry to hear this. I didn't know your story, I'm a relative newbie here, but just wanted to say it's really touched me and I'm keeping everything crossed for your recovery. This is a lot to deal with for you and your partner. Massive hugs to you both xxx

Ladies...AF is here!!! 37 days after medical management.

@AnnaMC214 I'm sorry to hear your story, my heart and well wishes go out to you. I cannot imagine what its been like and I am sorry this has happened. You may not feel it but I admire how strong you are and I pray that the hormone tablets start kicking in soon! Xxx

@MrsMGE I'm not far behind you, 33 days since my surgical management. I'm so pleased your first cycle is out the way!! You can start fresh now, wishing you luck for your rainbow :) xx

Thanks @BabyPending. That is very close indeed! How are you feeling after the procedure and in general? I hope it arrives swiftly for you too

I don't know if/when I'm actually going to ovulate this month, and how quickly we'll conceive, so trying not have high expectations. It's a lottery isn't it. A bit scary to find myself back in the TTC world, too.

@MrsMGE & @BabyPending thank you both for your very sweet words. I wish you lots of luck and baby dust for the future. xx

@MrsMGE thank you! I've been very up and down, the fluctuating hormones probably don't help! I feel more level headed now as time has gone on but this is my second mc in a row trying for our first baby and so I still have random waves of anxiety come over me and I get a little panicked about my situation and then it passes. My first cycle has been super confusing, not sure where I'm at so that's not helping! Hopefully I'll be right there with you TTC soon! I hope you are okay and starting your new cycle is kind of like a fresh start too

Xxx

Hello @AnnaMC214 - so good to hear from you. Sounds like you have had a challenging time, but your gut instinct was bang on. I'm very sorry that you find yourself requiring additional treatment and I really hope that you heal. Please do keep us all updated on your recovery. Sending lots of hugs and love 💕

@AnnaMC214 thank God you kept pushing. What was your path to diagnosis in the end? Did you have pain or just no period?

Wishing you a speedy recovery and please come back and talk to us whenever you feel the need.

I am still concerned that I may have this condition and have my first appointment in about six weeks. I will be so angry if they have wasted my time by making me wait to take my concerns seriously.

@Amanda81 thank you. I will definitely post an update after my 6 week check up. I hope everything is going really well with your pregnancy. xx

@zoomies1 I'm so sorry you're facing this uncertainty and yet more waiting. How long has it been since your erpc? There are many reasons why getting your periods back can take a while. Do you know if you're ovulating? I started temping after my erpc and could see when I had ovulated. Then my temp would drop and I'd get period pains but no bleeding. My research indicated that Asherman's was really the only explanation. I had to wait 4 weeks for a GP appointment and she didn't even know what AS is. She basically told me I was a hypercondriact who should stay away from Google! I convinced her to refer me to a gynaecologist but it was another 4 weeks to even get the letter through. It was at this point that we decided to go private with an AS specialist. I had a phone consultation with him first and based on what I told him he booked me in for a scan and treatment. It'll be 5 weeks tomorrow since that first GP appointment and I'm back home recovering. Sorry that was such an essay but I think the moral of the story is to trust your gut and, if you're getting fobbed off, try to take charge of the situation if you can. I wish you the best of luck with getting to the bottom of it. xx

@AnnaMC214 thanks for the added detail. I had my erpc on Feb 21st. My first cycle was about 73 days so I had started looking up AS and I then did get a 'period' but it was really, really light. I can't believe that my lining can be thick enough (I wondered if the erpc had been too aggressive) but I am trying to stay positive and believe that my body has just changed. The GP just said to 'keep trying'.

I do track BBT and use OPKs which tell me I am ovulating so maybe it's a hormonal issue - low progesterone or oestrogen. I feel like I'm just spinning.

I also looked at going private and just paying for a scan.

I managed to get an appointment for a blood test today because I am barely getting through the day without a lunchtime nap in my car!! It won't be for the same things but perhaps it will identify something that may help.

@zoomies1 it's all such a delicate balance which the mc can really throw off. I hope you get some answers and start to see some improvement soon. xx