First Pregnancy Missed Miscarriage (Part III)

[sadtoday21]

Hi ladies! Our last thread was automatically closed (again) because we reached the 1,000 post limit (twice!). I was hoping we would be able to start a new thread called First Pregnancy Post-MMC, but unfortunately we are not all quite there yet (BUT some of us are!! congrats!!!). I know we will all be pregnant someday soon and that this will end up being a lucky thread! In the meantime, I hope you will all join me as we continue on this journey together. You have all been an invaluable source of inspiration, support, and kindness for me and I want to thank you for making me feel less alone in this. This thread and the ladies on it have been a source of inspiration for me, which is why I created this blog to help other women find information and support after miscarriage: mcandbeyond.weebly.com/

About me, for any newcomers: 31 years old, first pregnancy ended in an MMC in February at 12 weeks (baby passed at nine), D&C the next day, found out five weeks later that it was a partial molar pregnancy and had follow-up with CX hospital until mid-May. Second early MC in April (we weren't supposed to be getting pregnant because of the molar, but didn't know about it at the time). Now TTC again nearly four months after the first MMC and so so ready for a baby!

OMG!!! I just got this beautiful thing this morning at 14 dpo. I noticed my temps were still high and thought AF would have come today so took a rapid results test (I think it’s 50 or higher concentration so not sensitive) and it’s really really dark!! From the one bd session five days before O!! DH will be so proud 😂😂😂. I’m in utter shock, didn’t think it was possible and already had two bfns earlier and no signs whatsoever.

@sadtoday21 I am SOOOOOOOOOO happy for you!!!!! Congrats! You so deserve this ♥️♥️♥️♥️

Thanks @Kiki061190 really hoping it sticks this time and is healthy! I'm scared out of mind now :). BTW your chart looks amazing - sure you will have good news this month too!

@bananamonkey I'm so sorry I just read your post about the second chemical. That's a terrible thing to go through and not know why. I really hope my post didn't upset you, we all know it can always go either way every time and there are no guarantees until baby is safe in your arms. Hoping you have better news soon and thinking of you! Xxx

@3204ECL Congrats on your scan! Amazing that you have made it to 9 weeks already!!!

Hope you are doing ok too @Amanda81! Thinking of you!

Oh wow @sadtoday21 that's amazing news. It just shows a bfn can become a bfp. That's a very strong line though so hopefully a good sign. Good luck! Xx

OooooooooMmmmmmmGggggggg!! @sadtoday21 - well that was totally unexpected! I'm over the moon for you. Looks like a nice strong healthy line for 14dpo. I was only wondering last night how you were getting on. Wowzers xx

Really sorry tho hear about the chemicals @bananamonkey - it just isn't fair. I hope the GP can help and perhaps get some tests done. If that is two in a row, they've surely got to take you seriously.

Good to hear that everything is going well with you @3204ECL and that the recent scan has shown to be progressing well. Your almost near the 12 week scan. Have you got your scan date?

Your chart looks very positive @Kiki061190 - fingers crossed for another BFP on here.

Fingers crossed for O @Catconfusion - you appear to be making a lot of sacrifices and changes to get this to happen, so I am sending you all my hope that this happens in this current stream of low temps.

I think if I've learnt anything recently, especially after your news @sadtoday21 dtd doesn't need to be every day or every other day. The fertility nurse at Ovusense said every 3 days is fine if no male factor issues. This equates to 2/3 times a week so actually with all the tracking and obsessing we do, an average sex life can get us upduffed pretty quickly if we ovulate. I really wonder if mindset is the key. If we just live our lives and move forwards with happiness it will just happen. I know it's not as simple as that for some and male and female infertility issues can make it difficult.

I do wonder if it's a bit like when you have your blood pressure done and it comes out higher than it should be. Maybe the tracking and the psychological impact of it can lower our chances. Today I know roughly where I am in my cycle, I know I haven't ovulated yet but I won't look at my chart until Sunday so maybe I will have it maybe I won't. Either way I'm ok with it.

@sadtoday21 and @amanda81, start a Pregnancy after Missed Miscarriage thread and we'll see you on the other side! Xx

@Amanda81 thank you. I had to do something as my chart was crazy last time. I was drinking more alcohol and eating a bit worse last cycle I think because we were going out more and doing more. We needed it after being very down and not doing much socially but this cycle I need to be more careful.

Just can't face another anovulatory cycle so it will be worth it. I'm discovering lots of crafty ways to make delicious food without the things that trigger pcos. I'm not really missing alcohol or caffeine which I had a love hate relationship with anyway.

My DH is a radio producer and this morning he spoke on air about our mmc and hospital provision as a lady was on the show whose baby died at 24 weeks and she had to deliver on the maternity suite. Her and her husband raised money towards a special bereavement suite where couples can give birth and have time with their baby following a loss.

I was so proud of him and the way he spoke about how our excitement turned to despair. Also how I was wheeled past the delivery suite for my ERPC and he was really sad because we'd expected to go through those doors in the coming months to have a healthy baby. It's good to hear pregnancy loss being spoken about because generally people are a bit clueless. Xx

@sadtoday21 wonderful news! So happy for you! I was so similar as DH was away the weekend I ovulated so was convinced we weren't in with a chance but here we both are! Got everything crossed for you and here if you need to talk as I know exactly how you are feeling and the next few weeks/months will be really tough at times. Sending lots of love 💕

@Amanda81 we don't have a date yet but are expecting it on the post any day now. How are you doing?

xxx

@sadtoday21 so happy for you!!! Wow this thread gives me hope 🥰

@bananamonkey so sorry to hear 😔 did this just start to happen after your miscarriage?

I'm still waiting for my period.. at least I know I ovulated last week. Tomorrow is six weeks from the day I had my d&c, I'm spotting a lot now and blood clots but it's only like 5 days DPO and I cannot wait for my period to start again. Really worried the clots won't come out though with the period (scan showed got some left), I'd have to have another D&c in the worst case scenario 😢

Such great news for you @sadtoday21 x

@Catconfusion I definitely agree on mindset! I’ve been entering my temps in the morning and just kind of forgetting about it for the rest of the day. I’m crossing my fingers for a BFP before my original due date in December.

Thanks for the comments on my chart ladies! I’ve been cramping every day since ovulation. I think I’ll test on Sunday and if it’s a bfn then I’ll know to expect AF the Monday!

@Kiki061190 It’s so hard when it’s something you want so much but the tracking can become a rabbit hole. Well done for taking it in your stride. I still think it’s a good tool, especially with irregular cycles like me.

Regarding the cramps, I had pains and cramps post ovulation too and I do wonder if it’s all part of the healing process. Now 5/6 months later I’m feeling that I’m a bit less aware of cramping and general pelvic pain. Hopefully this bodes well for falling pregnant again. Xx

I’m so sorry @SunStruck I hope it all passes soon so you can move on. I hate how long this process can be! Xx

Thanks everyone for their kind wishes!

TBH, I'm really scared this is going to be another chemical already. I just had a glob of EWCM - something I sometimes get the day before AF in the past - and I'm wondering if this is a bad sign?? My last chemical was also from dtd 5 days before O, so just feeling a bit nervous....

I’d have said that’s a really strong line for a chemical @sadtoday21 and EWCM can be completely normal in early pregnancy with all the hormonal changes. Try to relax if you can and keep busy. There is nothing you can do that will affect the outcome. Maybe get in to see the midwife early and ask for bloods. I really hope this is it for you. I don’t think I can think of anything in life as exciting and terrifying as this. You’re so strong and whatever happens you’ll be ok. I have a feeling all will be well this time! Xx

OMG you guys congratulations!!! So great to see some good news on here! Here’s hoping for a smooth and calm nine months for you both!

@bananamonkey really sorry about the CP. Do you mind me asking how many you have had now? I really hope your GP takes this seriously now.

@Catconfusion I’m doing the same as you. Have been having far too much fun and am now trying to cut back on the booze and start eating more healthily.

It’s hard isn’t it @zoomies1 but definitely helps.

In my case we hardly went wild as generally eat well but went from not drinking at all to 4 nights out with a few drinks, again not crazy. One was my birthday so well needed. Ordinarily this wouldn’t affect fertility but with my pcos I wonder if it tipped the balance. I think if the hormones are out of whack diet and alcohol can make a big difference. With pcos even occasional treats can affect things so I’m being super careful this cycle.

Don’t get me wrong we had a great June and it was good to get socialising again but now it’s time to focus on getting my cycles back to normal.

I just had a call from the nhs referral team to say our fertility referral has been processed and to expect a call from the fertility clinic soon. I’m really pleased as we’ve opted for Bourne Hall which is a good one. It would be lovely to conceive without drug intervention so we’re hoping it happens before our appointment comes up. Xx

Thanks for the sympathies, had a few cries but feeling a bit better now after sorting some life admin and doing some exercise.

@SunStruck yes it’s only been since the MC although I wasn’t temping and tracking in the past so can’t say for sure. This time was super early, I’m only 12 dpo but I had some strong symptoms so tested on Friday.

I’ve had 4 cycles since the ERPC (6 week cycles) and 3 of those had BFPs that came to nothing and one which I think was anovulatory. Feel like my insides must be broken Got an appointment with GP on 30th.

No worries @bananamonkey I’m just so sorry this keeps happening. Hopefully after this one your body will be fully recovered. I have to say I’m feeling a bit like my body has only just got there. Chances are it’s just been part of your body getting back to normal. Hopefully the doctor will refer you to the recurrent miscarriage clinic just in case. I’d be pushing for that at this point I think. I know they were early losses but you’ll want to rule out any underlying causes because it’s so traumatic to keep going through it. I really hope the next one sticks and at least you get some answers as to why this keeps happening if not. Always here to chat if you need to. Xx

Thanks @Catconfusion - I'm really thrown by this and way too nervous!! Never ever expected it. I think you are right that these things happen when you least expect them/aren't thinking about it at all...I was so convinced I wasn't pregnant I had two g&ts yesterday - large ones! I only tested this morning on a whim because I didn't see the temp drop before AF. Sheesh. This is a crazy crazy ride. I can't believe it and I definitely am going to try to take your advice and not think too much about it.

I'm so sorry you are still having to regulate your diet so much to deal with the pcos. I hope O comes on time this month and you get a nice surprise at the end of it before the fertility testing! xxx

@bananamonkey I'm so sorry to hear, but happy you got a doc appointment soon! Try to take it easy and be kind to yourself this month, it's difficult when all we want is a baby I know... 😔 Have you had a scan since the d&c to check that all is ok in there? I did because they asked me to come back for a follow up scan 2 weeks after, and the dr said some blood clots left and lining still not good, so to not try before I've had a period and another scan to check lining again.

I think that it wouldn't have stuck if we would have tried now when I ovulated as the insides are still not 'clean' so to speak and lining not good enough...

Thanks both, I didn’t have a second scan as I didn’t meet the criteria but I did have some weird clots much later so wondering whether to request it.

I’ve mapped out my cycles for the GP and actually I think I see a pattern of improvement, just not clear why nothing’s sticking.

Cycle 1 (Day 1 = ERPC)
Days to Ovulation = 29
Luteal Phase = 13 days
Cycle Length = 40 days

Cycle 2
Days to Ovulation = 27
Luteal Phase = 8 days
Cycle Length = 35 days (no bfp)

Cycle 3
Days to Ovulation = 25
Luteal Phase = 15
Cycle Length = 41 days

Cycle 4
Days to Ovulation = 18
Luteal Phase = TBC
Cycle Length = TBC

@bananamonkey that's good! I should also keep track actually.

So the Dr who did the d&c told me that they usually don't 'scrape it bare' so to speak, to save on the lining a bit, and let some of the other clots come out naturally.

It's great you're getting checked now, sounds like you just need a scan and see if something's left - That would be easy to fix in the UK (they have pills that can get rid of that).

Do any of you ladies check your cervix? Mines has started to go higher the past 2 days when I’ve been checking it and I’ve had a really small amount of EWCM as well which is odd. I swear it was down a couple of days ago and more firmer!

@bananamonkey it looks like your days until O are defo coming down and improving! I really hope you get some answers. Nobody should have to go through 3 chemicals! So unfair. Sending love your way ♥️