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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 27 - Tests, Treatments and Trying Again

999 replies

BumbleBee0 · 03/07/2015 07:26

Tea, hugs, a wealth of collective knowledge and lots of hand holding as we try again. This thread moves like lightning so hold on to your hats!
Previous thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/2404797-Recurrent-Miscarriage-Support-Thread-26-tests-treatment-and-trying-again

OP posts:
Minnie74 · 05/07/2015 17:23

freckle I'm very tempted not to do the prog till bfp. Part of me thinks (weirdly and most probably wrongly) I can handle another MC better than I can months of not getting pg. 18 months is the longest we've taken and I'd be 42 by then! I think because the last was definitely a bad egg (and most probably the one before that too) I feel like surely our luck must be ready for a change and that if I keep going one will stick- even if it means another MC inbetween. Could do with Dh taking it more seriously though-he's back on the beer most days (only one or two but still!) He's up for the extra bonking though surprisingly enough Grin

march yes one month of scratch benefit left for me so don't worry!

jady glad everything is ok and totally understand the need to step back and be positive. Lovely to hear from you for updates though x

Thanks emerald and bootles I'll be more cheery tomorrow I'm sure!

bootles making a life change is scary at any time so why not do everything at once Wink

Frecklefire · 05/07/2015 17:44

oh and minnie** i hope you understand that i meant you HAD been incredibly generous, and people need to give our experiences weight and acknowledgement too - we shoyldn't feel we have to hide stuff!

IFinishedTheBiscuits · 05/07/2015 17:44

Freckle, are you still doing Athens test this month? Just wondering if possible 'Grexit' will have an impact on service. Although in theory they need as much money coming in from abroad as possible...

Frecklefire · 05/07/2015 18:02

Ohh...hadn't even thought about that biscuits**! Feck!

girliesaints · 05/07/2015 18:06

Thanks ladies think will proceed with accupuncture and Coventry whilst went for hystoscopy. Hoping appointment will be quicker but been told to expect longer in case they can't squeeze me in quicker.

Already loving my Fitbit and already obsessed with how many steps I've done. Proof will be if it makes me get thin/ stop eating rubbish!

Jady, glad to hear mini-jady is doing ok, even if you've had another scare along the way. Hope it's plain selling from here.

March, forgot to ask how you're doing ? Remember you were quite fed up before I went away x

bakingtins · 05/07/2015 18:13

Was it mrsd stressing about weeing less? That's normal in 2nd trimester, uterus is up out of your pelvis so not pressing on your bladder so much it'll get worse again at the end

Minnie74 · 05/07/2015 18:34

freckle don't worry chick! Thank you though Smile

mrsdiddlydoo · 05/07/2015 19:21

Yes it was me baking. Thank you for your reassuring words! I should be counting it as some kind of temporary blessing I guess.

IFinishedTheBiscuits · 05/07/2015 19:25

Freckle, I would imagine that any industry in Greece which can bring money in from abroad will be the last to 'down tools'. But still a very unstable time.

(Feel very sorry for the ordinary people who are stuck in the middle of the Greece/Germany power battle. However much their culture may or may not have contributed to it. It must be very scary.)

Erica21 · 05/07/2015 19:38

Mrs D I must be peeing for us both Wink I'm 14+2 and up twice a night, and therefore v grumpy!

Am hating the wait until 20 weeks, I really feel so negative even though the 12wk scan was fine. I can't help worrying, feeling cross at being so naive in my easy first pregnancy. I keep wondering about getting a private scan to reassure myself. Are there other ladies who've had their babies successfully after MC who just couldn't relax? I'm also v run down at the moment... Cold sore, sore throat, runny nose Hmm
Sorry, very me me me.

Jady I hope you're ok after your scare. I also have my 20wk scan on Aug 20th, let's hope for plain sailing all the way.

Big hugs to all x

Brummiegirl15 · 05/07/2015 20:04

Barking seeing pregnant women still makes me uncomfortable and a bit jealous!!! Blush

Minnie big hugs to you, you are a braver soul than me - I wouldn't have even gone. I actively avoided friends who were pregnant.

And actually I was glad that I fell pregnant before my colleague gave birth, it meant I was happy for her when her little one arrived rather than devastated again

But my strange feelings towards pregnant women are still there. Even at the hospital waiting for my scans, I would resentfully eye up the pregnant women further along than me.

Which is fifty shades of fucked up I know

Marchgirl · 05/07/2015 20:16

If it's fucked up then we're all fucked up brummie!

Did your mid cycle spotting stop freckle?

Thanks for asking girlie. I'm still fed up. Feeling very negative about it all. But lovely gp prescribed my steroids the other day (and said she hoped to see me under better circumstances in the baby clinic soon. ), so desperately trying to see this as a positive rather than my first reaction, which was to think it didn't really matter as I was never going to reach that stage again. Also back in counselling so there are some positives and have seen a few pairs of magpies

Frecklefire · 05/07/2015 20:33

Fucking magpies - sights you see when you havn't got a gun...

Crazy cycle march, spotted thurs (ov) then fri, but nothing since. Doubt i'm pregnant this month. Lack of bonking and vom bug doesn't really make for being uber fertile. Not holding my breath.

Marchgirl · 05/07/2015 20:45

I'm happy to see pairs of magpies, just not one at a time! This is a ridiculous conversation for me to be having given that I'm not superstitious.

Och, you never know freckle, i always seem to be successful at cycles i think must be non starters. I think it's probably less dependent on precise timing than we think, and more on luck

Marchgirl · 05/07/2015 20:46

Also that could be ov bleeding then (i think that's a thing)

Emerald72 · 05/07/2015 20:48

I'm glad I'm not the only one seeing bloody magpies!! Kept seeing single ones whist before last MC.
What's the scratch and how long does it work for?

IFinishedTheBiscuits · 05/07/2015 21:32

My DH insists that there are certain times of year when you're likely to only see single magpies because they're in the pull. And that anyway, the rules are that you keep counting for your entire journey, they don't have to all be together. Because unless you're in a magpie sanctuary you NEVER see 6 or more together.

ThePopAndCry · 05/07/2015 21:57

Hi ladies! I am waaaaaaay behind again and don’t have a hope in hell of catching up so sorry. I’ve not been around much as I’ve been keeping my head down trying to get through the last few weeks of the term. Two more to go!

Welcome to the newbies. As ever, sorry you find yourself here but hope you get some much needed support and sympathy.

Massive congrats on the recent positive scans brummie cloud jady and others. Am sooooo pleased for you all.

bootles hugs. It is incredibly difficult, each experience brings a new set of memories to deal with. I hope the results are reassuring.

minnie that sounds fucking horrendous. I hope you are looking after yourself today.

Last weekend went as well as could be expected and thank you for thinking of me. It was another massive milestone done and got through. We stayed in the most beautiful spot in the Lakes and on dd’s due date I sat in the garden with a few red wines, watched the sun set, cried, remembered and paid my respects to her little life.

AF this past week (the timing with dd due date is just bollocks, isn’t it?!) put me back on a 28 day cycle (which I haven’t had since 2 years ago) and definitely much heavier (5 days instead of 3, sorry for TMI!). Am taking these as good signs that the scratch at Coventry and/or all my supplements are having a positive effect.

And I now have my final letter from Leeds outlining my ‘intensive regime’ should we want to do this crazy fucking thing all over again. The prof is adamant that because of the positive lupus anticoagulant test, I would need aspirin before ttc, along with high-dose folic acid. After masses of consulting with Dr Google I’ve decided why not? Fuck it. If we do try again, I haven’t had aspirin in the past and it’s gone wrong 4 times. So, in a totally twisted leap of logic, I can’t see it will do any harm next time. I know this isn’t scientific, ladies, so forgive me!

Also, confirmation I would get heparin as soon as I got a bfp, and there would be no need to wait until later for a vialbility/location scan. This is really reassuring as, apart form dd, all my first trimester pregnancies have not got past the 5/6 week mark so this would hopefully help that initial implantation period. She was a bit sceptical about using the progesterone beyond the first trimester, as suggested by Coventry, but also said she was happy to go with it until at least 20 weeks due to that being a significant point with losing dd. So, that’s that. I don’t think I could really ask for more support (or medication!) and cannot really fault Leeds in their willingness to try all the different things suggested by other hospitals. Bless ‘em.

And finally… has anybody else read ‘1 in 4: Shifting the Balance…’ by Barbara Toppin? I thought it was good but found her description/explanation about early and late losses particularly moving as I really felt that for the first time ever, I had found somebody explaining why all of my miscarriages have been ‘missed’. I've always felt that this is significant but could be wrong. Would be interested in other’s thoughts.

Waves to you all.

ThePopAndCry · 05/07/2015 21:58

And lol re the magpie talk. I thought it was just me! biscuits am loving the 'whole journey' rule. I will being implementing this from tomorrow!

IFinishedTheBiscuits · 05/07/2015 23:27

Pop, I think the rules go: if you still only see one magpie on your entire journey, and it's a day ending in a 'y', you can totally substitute a pigeon for second magpie. Wink

Emerald72 · 05/07/2015 23:33

Ha ha ha biscuits re magpies! I like that theory

Emerald72 · 05/07/2015 23:35

I did however see 4 together today on a roundabout; maybe luck is changing.....

IFinishedTheBiscuits · 05/07/2015 23:46

Did you Emerald?!! (Think it's singles season so was probably magpie speed-dating.)

Here's to exceedingly good luck! WineSmile

BumbleBee0 · 06/07/2015 00:26

Grrrr can't get to sleep..!
Ha ha, don't get me started on magpies, as soon as I see one I'm looking about like a desperate deranged woman for the second whilst trying not to crash the car!! There's a few couples around us and one of them hang about on our neighbours roof at the back of our house, but recently I think a third has joined them so hoping it's good luck (and a girl?). The other day I heard a squawking at the front window and there were 3 on our drive (probably the same 3). And the other day 2 must have been perched just above my bedroom window and I nearly shit myself when they flew off. The last time a single 1 came right up to the front window was before/during or after mc2. But saying that I saw a dead one a couple of weeks ago... But I tell myself it must have been a single lonely one so its in a better place now.
biscuits I have definitely seen 6 or 7 magpies together, there's a horse field at the end of our road and they seem to gather there sometimes. Think I saw 3 couples on different rooftops the other day too.
God I'm so obsessed by bloody magpies I realise I sound like a crazy old woman!! Feel like I should start worshipping the magpie for luck, I even thought of hanging shiny metal things from our tree as that's meant to attract them/or they find it playful!!! BlushBlushBlush (losing the plot!)

OP posts:
BumbleBee0 · 06/07/2015 00:36

Will try and catch up now I've got that magpie stuff off my chest...

pop been thinking of you and hoping you are getting through your tough times. Sounds like you gave your dd a beautiful send off. Glad you have a positive plan in place if you decide to try again. I've not heard of that book but very interested to hear what it says about missed mcs. I too feel there's something about them that needs to be understood.

march what an awful and awkward situation to be in with mil. I hope your DH put her straight. Well done for keeping calm and not telling her to do one.

minnie ouch that day sounded horrid. You've done so well for getting through it. Flowers and hugs for the results of your little one. It must be very sad when you hear those results.

Fingers crossed for those in the 2ww x

OP posts: