Headwreck & Hope. Support for those who are/might be experiencing MMC/MC/early pregnancy loss.

[mrsb0710]

Original threadtotal headwreck, empty sac 11 days ago, embryo 6wk there today

Support for those who are/might be experiencing MMC/MC/early pregnancy loss.

dont know if theres a timeframe but once everything has passed the cramps should just stop. if youre still cramping unfortunately sounds like theyre is still something going on. hope youre ok and have rl support

sorry to read this megan. im still waiting for to happen (mmc). hope it passes quickly.

Autumn.. Hope your wait isn't too long, I found the wait harder than this bit. I started spotting the day before my 2nd scan so they told me as it was starting to happen to let nature take its course ????

Hope you're ok megan and this passes quickly for you

megan Im sure it varies but I had heavy bleeding for a week then down to spotting for the last few days.
I do now have a splitting headache which apparently is common. The fun never ends

Hello, I'd very sadly like to join you?

I had a late miscarriage at 15 weeks in January. Last Friday I had a positive test followed by more BFPs on Saturday and Sunday 10-12 dpo) On Tuesday I decided to do another test and the line was lighter. Concerned I did a digi which was BFN. Two more FRERs have been incredibly faint so I guess I'm having an early miscarriage (chemical pregnancy?) I've seen my GP today and have been given a form for bloods which I can't get done until tomorrow so I'm basically sitting here waiting to bleed. I've been having backache today and now having cramps very low down, kind of in my cervix.

Really don't know what to do with myself. My DP works away during the week and won't be home until Friday. I hadn't told anyone I was expecting so I didn't have anyone to talk to. I feel lost.

How long might it be until I start to actually miscarry? The waiting is torture and I'm scared.

Bronze.. I haven't been out of the house since the scan Monday morning. Scared incase it gets really heavy and I leak ?? don't think I could handle the embarrassment on top of everything else. I have just done my first online food shop to be delivered tomorrow, hoping they don't swap out too much as my dd has an allergy..

I am still cramping etc so I think I have more to come still.. Had a low day today, I just got upset that everything is carrying on as normal but I'm just stuck in the house loosing my baby ????

Hi mega sad to see you here ?? I'm one week past my natural mc now. I've been back at work since Monday, and I'm finding so long as I keep busy I can manage... I'm getting splitting headaches, and so tired though!
My DH has been totally amazing throughout- I know he's not feeling it as much as I am, but to be honest I kind of expect that- it was my body that was incubating our baby bean after all... We bought a little flowering tree for the patio as a memory. I find it helps a lot to see it each day. DH verbalizes it to me as 'the bean had a reason it couldn't stay, we have to let it go.' Does anyone else have anything they try to rationalize it with?

probably I'm still waiting for mine too so no real advice but I just wanted to say I'm so sorry for both of your losses . Hope the GP gives you some answers or options tomorrow if you're still waiting by then.

Megan I hope you're ok tonight. Is your DP with you now? This whole process is so isolating but you're not alone - we're here with you too.

swimming that's so lovely about your tree. I had been thinking about getting a plant that will still be green in December, or will flower then. It's so sad to see ladies from our AN bus on these boards. I hope you're doing ok.

I went into work again today but ended up coming home at lunchtime - everything hit me out of nowhere and I just needed to get out and go home and cry. I did feel cross with myself for a while. I am finding it very hard to let myself be upset but it just keeps popping up and surprising me.

Sorry to see more ladies joining us.

My natural mc lasted about a week 2 days of brown and then a week of red. Some cramps but not too bad. i hope it's as 'easy' for you all.

Big hugs Megan it's so hard to see the world going on around you while you feel like your life is falling apart. I hope tomorrow is better for you.

probably sorry I can't help answer your question but wanted to send you a hug. I saw you on the conception board that I lurk on until brave enough to join in properly and I'm sorry this has happened to you xx
I've been ok the last week and then suddenly welled up in the shower tonight. No idea why it came over me but I feel so sad.

Been thinking about representing her in some way as I know some of you have with plants. I'm not good with plants though and don't want to kill it so I've been thinking of a symbol. My DD has always been represented by a star as she is obsessed with all things stars and moon and has been since she was tiny and it fits well with her personality and what she has brought to our lives. So I tonight I've come up with a feather for our lost baby - fragile, fleeting, beautiful and gentle. What do you think? I'm not usually into stuff like this so I'm not great at it. I'm guessing as it made me cry it might be the right choice!

Sorry for the outpouring.

Oh Lilli that's lovely. A feather is perfect.

X post mega. Don't be cross at yourself. There is no right time to be over it and getting on with life. Be gentle with yourself

Ps. Am also nervous of killing plant - going to have to buy something indestructible!

I'm sure you'll find something perfect. I love the idea of getting something that flowers in December.

How are you feeling now?

Autumn I'm so sorry. How are you this evening?
It's awful how you're being made to wait for treatment.
I had exactly the same as you two weeks ago. Is had brown spotting at 8 weeks, again at 9 weeks then pink spotting which frightened me. A scam confirmed that it had stopped at 7weeks 4 days. I requested an ERPC (had medical management in oct and wasn't keen) and was booked in two days later. Fortunately (I think helped by internal scan) it all happened naturally the next day and wasn't too traumatic or painful. I had period like cramps for 24 hrs along with a fairly heavy period like bleed resulting in passing of the sac.
I didnt have a great experience with medical management- nothing happened whilst I was in hospital for the day then mega heavy bleeding when I got home. Unfortunately it was incomplete and I still needed and ERPC two weeks later.
You will get past this, your body has carried a baby before and will do it again. Take care and rest lots xxxx

Dh has been here this evening.. He is struggling but being a massive support.. Fingers crossed for a better day tomorrow.. My dd is going to my parents tomorrow and I have said once I get myself sorted I will go over and spend the afternoon there with them hopefully.. Get me out of the house but also somewhere I will be comfortable.

I am also thinking of something to remember baby by.. I'm not very good with plants, but I wear a charm bracelet and all my charms mean something to me so I think I'm going to try and find a special for that. I have a charm for my dd, wedding, husband etc

That's a nice idea Megan, any idea what you'll go for? I have no garden and am terrible with house plants so that's out for me too, but when I was pregnant I was planning to crochet a baby blanket like I did for my boy, I'm still going to make it with the hope I can use it in the future. So kind of a hopeful memorial, a stripey rainbow blanket for this baby and the next.

Megan a charm sounds a great idea. Having a break from DD was what I needed to focus on me for a bit and allow myself to cry/ curl up under a duvet etc without thinking about putting on a face for her. It sounds like you've got some good support.

A blanket sounds good suz, very positive and looking forward rather than backwards. Loving hearing all the different ways we remember. I wish I could crochet but I tried to teach myself and gave up v quickly!!

How are you today probably and Megan?

I'm off work today - feel physically and emotionally exhausted. Really want to comfort myself with crap telly/magazines but can't concentrate on anything so just lying in bed staring at the ceiling feeling numb. Wish there was a fast forward button on life so we could get through this rubbish bit! I'm such an impatient person! Still no spotting and no real cramping but feeling quite twingy down below.

It's weird...Last time I remember actually wanting to lie in bed all day (goes against my nature normally!) was the day I went into labour with DS. Can't help wondering if there's a connection and my body is getting ready

Loving reading everyone's ideas for remembering their babies. Really beautiful.

Hi mega - I've started spotting this morning after a very upset tummy (sorry tmi). Been having cramps so have taken painkillers. Really wishing my DP was here as I need a hug so badly. Instead I'm going to walk my dogs and go back to bed until it's school run time. How I'm going to put a positive face on for my kids I really don't know.

Hope your day is as ok as it can be.

Mega.. Exactly how I felt yesterday! Feeling better today the cramps have calmed down so I'm hoping I passed the worst yesterday! Feel like I'm an emotional roller coaster ??

Managed to do some washing, looking at holidays etc, Iv got a close friend popping in for a coffee shortly. All these things I wouldn't even have crossed my mind yesterday.

Haven't been able to look at charms yet as the pandora website is being updated ????

I bought a start charm for my links bracelet. When DS asked me what it was for, I said 'a bright star shining in the sky'.

Is anyone else REALLY struggling with work?

I have quite a demanding, fast paced, senior but part time job and at the best of times it's a bit of a juggling act having to do work on days off, evenings etc. I've just a few weeks ago taken a promotion which makes it more stressful.

I'm really struggling to focus, to actually do my work, even to go into the office - spent 40 minutes trying to psyche myself up to go in while sitting in the car outside the other day. I am dropping balls left right and centre. I'm underperforming in client meetings. I really can't see how I'm going to get it together, ever.

I know it's early days but I desperately want to ask my boss for a demotion, I'm just not coping, but I'm scared showing this weakness now could really impact my career.

I'm in a unique role where I'm the only person who does what I do so there isn't anyone to pick up slack.

Any advice massively appreciated x

Megan I'm so glad you're feeling better today. Enjoy some me-time, hope some normality is on the cards from today. How's your bleeding now?

Probably I'm sorry - has your day got any better? Will your DP be home late tomorrow - if so is there anyone else nearby you can call on? It's so difficult when so few people know. I was anxious about telling people but by and large it's helped me so much. I think the Miscarriage Association have support lines, or just keep posting on here for support. Don't feel alone, you're absolutely not

worka Is there any way at all you can take some time off? Even just a half day to decompress? This intense period will hopefully be short-lived (although no doubt come and go for a bit) so you need to give yourself a chance to get over it. I powered back into work and ended up having a total meltdown yesterday - I feel dreadful now and still worried about my projects going to pot but overall so much better to be at home. For me it got to the point where it wasn't a rational choice any more, the grief became physical. I wasn't expecting it to feel like this and am disappointed in myself for not toughing it out, but we're only human beings and we have to process these feelings somehow, right? I know it's really tough when you're under a lot of career pressure. Is there anyone at work you could confide in? Just having somebody there who knows might help, if you really can't get away. Sorry for the ramble, I know it's all easier said than done. Just wanted to say you're being really brave and don't forget to look after yourself