Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 18 - tests, treatment, trying again.

[bakingtins]

Buckle up, the threads move like lightening! Tea, sympathy, information, support and combined wisdom to guide you through the maze of testing and treatment for recurrent miscarriage. Newbies always most welcome.

Please start with the traditional recap of your stats.

Sorry to hear about your gran counting, she sounds like an amazing lady

Monten I really feel for you, I am not reading anything that will upset me if I can help it but I know with the exception of maybe one or two people I am the only person not pregnant amongst all the group threads I have joined over two years. It's totally heart breaking but there is nothing I (we) can do bar keep trying and keep our fingers crossed. I think acceptance is really important too. If you can accept that it might not happen but hope that it does then I think we stand half a chance to retain our sanity.

Sadly my partner is B+ I assume as my son is B+.

Flower29, tannyloo, cloudjumper, sunandrainbows, bakingtins, boozle80, loopyaboutmy2boys, Monten and pop - thankyou thankyou thankyou soooooo much for your support. I wouldnt be so ruffled but i only turned 40 last month and ds is only 19 months old! She only sings one tune and as bakingtins said "its often used as a way of being dismissed and unwilling to adress other issues that can be changed." That is EXACTLY how it feels. I have written all your comments down ladies and i plan to read them out to my lovely gp. I can ask to be referred to Leeds General Infirmary, where Prof James Walker works, who is very well respected, rather than my little west Bradford hospital where i had my ds. My friend who has had 2 mc was seen by him only 2 weeks after her 2nd one and pretty much promised the world. I wonder if the tests i've already had done. I think the LGI may be more specialised and better funded. Thankyou again ladies, this is nit hyperbole, you have been my real, live life-line this past horrible two weeks. Xxxx

The pain on this thread is so pallpable

I'm pissed off that no one was interested in me when I had had 2 miscarriages. Only now that three babies have died does anyone give a shit,I resent the fuck out of my GPs and could kick myself for not moving surgeries and kicking up a stink to get tested earlier.

Huge hugs to you Freckle

sebs I hate the feeling of being left behind. There are a number of people I know who started ttc#1 the same time as me who now have two children.... And fellow mners who were going through the same fertility clinic tests etc at the same time as me who got lucky with clomid/iui/ivf first time and now have babies. Happy for them, but still .

Andcounting I'm so very sorry for your loss. I lost my last Nana just over a year ago and dream about her now. Sounds like she had a powerful influence in your life.

Freckle big hugs to you. It is shit when consultants become bogged down in politics and how cost effective treatments are in the big scheme of things. Makes you feel like that grain of sand in an expansive beach.

so DP handed in my resignation and hr called anDi explained why I felt I had no advocate for my role anymore and just no energy to try and reason with a complete dick head. She seemed to understand. I also explained that I'm scared shitless of getting pregnant again and need to eliminate the main sources of stress right now.

Big hugs Tanny you hang in there! I've never been through labour but I can understand your fear. You just hang on now.

Twilight well done in resigning, have you accepted the job offer too?

Cloud I'm not religious (or am i), but given the chance, hell yeah I'd go. If it gives you that opportunity to say a proper goodbye? Have a proper send off, what do you have to lose.

Big hugs to you all tonight.

Its not going to be long before we're on another new thread!

Tanny I hope everything is going OK and you enjoyed your bath. Can't wait to hear your news. It gives me hope. And it really is different how I feel about the preggers ladies on her versus real life.

freckle I'm glad you've had so much support on here. Your consultant sounds like a worse nightmare... And in my opinion you definitely should try to see someone else.

counting your granny sounds amazing. I miss mine so much. She was a legend. She sorted all of us out. So matriarchal. I hope you are doing OK and the next bit goes smoothly.

monten I understand your with the other thread. It will be our and others on heres time soon enough. We can do it. As lame as that sounds.

Hi to everyone else. It's almost the weekend... Thank god! I wish I had other peoples courage on here making changes in there lives. You guys rock.

So... I'm at Coventry tomorrow. Eek. Bit scared. Bit unprepared. Might have had a beer after climbing tonight (to help me sleep ... Honestly). Bit head in the sand (hope I can drive that way). Feel positive in that I'm doing something, but having trouble limiting the flashbacks of the last 12m events in my head.

MrsD it is a bit scary to go to Coventry, but actually it was the most positive experience I had on this journey, both profs are lovely. You will feel listened to and understood and won't leave feeling dismissed or like you have been wasting their time. You will leave with the start of a plan.

Give them our best wishes, and tell them baby Tan should be here any day x

Counting sorry to hear about your granny. I adored mine and still miss her three years after her death. So good to have had the time together. Big hugs

diddly good luck for tomorrow! Let us know how it goes.

freckle respect to you for taking our comments to your go, ha! Good luck and I hope you get to see prof walker, he sounds amazing!

pop glad today was a good day. We're all here to support you through the bad and good as much as we can.

counting sorry to hear about your gran. Sounds like a great woman. I hope you're ok and your womb feelings are ok.

cloud I've not been to a service but I would seriously consider it if I was aware of one. I'm not religious but for me it would probably be a way of acknowledging it.

Sorry for anyone I've missed, I've been on the tonight!

I am officially a tit!! After jokingly imying to friend that she's pregnant she has said she isn't and would tell me if she was!! I think I felt a bit better knowing she wasn't tho, how bad is that?!!

Crossed posts tanny, hope you're doing ok. X

Sorry, I think my last post was aimed at Monten, about everyone else moving on. Anyway.

Tanny I can't believe baby Tan is keeping us all hanging on like this! We're going to be on a new thread before the birth announcement at this rate!

Jady do you feel better now you've resigned? If you're interested in the ttc after mc meditation track I mentioned further up the thread just pm me your email address .

mrsd good luck today!

Morning ladies, I've been keeping up and thinking of you all. Totally knackered with work and patents eve last night. My back was so sore last night I just couldn't get comfortable.
Freckle, hope you can swap to a less dismissive consultant!
Andcounting sorry about the loss of your gran.
Mrsdiddlydoo, good luck at Coventry today.
Waves to everyone. Thank fuck its Friday!!!

*parent's eve. Although maybe some docs need a patients eve???

counting sorry to hear about your Grandmother. It must be hard. When do you have your scan?

freckle I am 41, had DS at 37. A number of doctors have told me it's all about getting a good egg, whilst seeming to totally ignore and gloss over the fact that at least two of mine were chromosomally normal. Its beyond frustrating. At Coventry they very much seem to think there are other things going on and I'm convinced my issues are autoimmune. And I don't know where she gets the 1 in 10 figure.

Good luck at Coventry mrsdiddly

patient's evening is a great idea!

Good luck mrsdiddly hope this is a really positive step for you.

tanny I know you must be thoroughly pissed off with 'not had that baby yet?' So suffice to say you are in my thoughts and I'm willing you and baby tan on. Stay zen.

sebs sorry getting you confused with someone else.

just sorry you're suffering with back pain

Tanny I hope your head is doing ok in this build up to birth

Diddly best of luck!!!! Hope Cov goes well. Still got no AF so still holding out for when I will get an appt.

Counting so sorry about your Gran

Well I rolled into my hotel at 3am this morning after my event last night and feel rather fragile...

But since May last year I've either been pregnant or recovering from an mc. It was nice to forget for a change. And be out with people who have no idea what I've been through.

That said I feel shocking now

AF has finally put in an appearance. Cycle longer again this month, blimmin' confusing. So, we are another for Coventry in March! Hope it goes well today mrsdiddly

Thanks again all.x

freckle pleased you have a plan, sounds like a good one.

monten sorry you're feeling awful. You'll get there.

mrs all the best at Coventry. Look forward to your update.

bootles my scan is Tuesday. If scan shows I am 6 weeks they will test blood for thyroid function, as this is what they expect to be going wrong and causing the miscarriages. If scan shows less than 6 weeks I will go back the following week.

Keep missing stuff!
freckle, so that a healthcare professional can be so negative about your chances. We all know are chances start to decrease a little as we get older, we don't need to be reminded. What we do need is people who are going to do their best to treat the underlying issue rather than using this as an excuse for doing nothing. A good friend of mine in RL has been treated equally badly by her gp for the same reason. It's wrong. The are lots of women in their 40s who have perfectly healthy successful pgs and its an outdated view to say it's not possible.

Jady. Well done on making a change. Sounds like resigning is the right thing for you at the moment. You'll be in a better mindset soon and then you can think about how to go forward. Time to concentrate on yourself in the meantime x

diddly, good luck for Coventry! Look forward to hearing all about it. Have you got questions prepared?

tanny, still thinking of you. Hope things have gone better overnight x

Waves to everyone else

Have a smiley on my ovulation test today! Must...keep....legs....closed.....aaarrrhhhh!

I do keep missing things!
flen, sorry af got you . Glad you have a plan for Coventry. that will be another thing ticked off the list and a good treatment plan either way.

flower, it's so hard to resist, isn't it? I think I'm just past ov and feeling slightly less manic today, so just hold on a bit longer and I'm sure you'll feel better too . Hoping next month will be easier for both of us, as Coventry will be so close then. Really hope the acupuncture helps shorten my cycle!