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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

total headwreck, empty sac 11 days ago, embryo 6wk there today...

953 replies

SuperGlue · 17/11/2014 14:29

It was very hard to put this into a title but basically I had a dating scan 11 days ago when i reckoned i ought to have been 9 weeks pg. In the scan there was an empty embryonic sac measuring 7 wks but no yolk or fetal pole. The sonographer said it was most likely a miscarriage but that I would need to come back in 10 days to see if there was any growth during that time as a protocol.

I have spent the past 11 days in total turmoil and limbo. Waiting any moment to miscarry etc.

Went back today for the second scan expecting to be taken in this week for a d&c only to find that the sac had grown in the 10 days and there was now a yolk, fetal pole and an embryo measuring just 6 weeks. No heartbeat but she said heartbeat would kick in, if it was going to, over the next 7 days. SO basically she could not confirm that it was a miscarriage at this stage but that we would need to go back this day next week to see if there is a heartbeat. If not it will be confirmed then.

She was fairly certain that there was a problem with the development of this pregnancy and that the most likely scenario would be that it would develop this far and trail off and we would not find a heartbeat on Monday.

I just can't get my head around it all. Even if my dates were out a bit, I didn't think it was possible to be out that much.

Has anyone else ever gone through this?

I feel like my head is about to explode trying to take it all in / work it all out and another 7 days waiting stretches out in front of me..........

OP posts:
wonkylegs · 21/01/2015 18:05

Oops

mrsb0710 · 22/01/2015 18:13

Hi ladies.
Found out that work has received my resignation, they just haven't responded or acknowledged it yet. Call to HR tomorrow I think!
Have a job interview next week for NHS 111 -its nearby and sounds ok. I know some of it will be high pressure but it will be different and I can start fresh.

Feel a lot less stressed today and that hopefully we can turn a corner for a better 2015. Even managed to DTD Grin

How is everyone else going?
I've used Ovia for tracking my cycles and it seems to work. Although at the moment who knows where I'm at.

gingerbreadmam · 22/01/2015 18:35

thats great news mrsb good luck for your interview. your old work are terrible heres to a better employer!

ooh back on with ttc too the day just gets better.

i saw my first real life tiny baby today since mc. he was beautiful did make me think of what ive lost out on though. aibu to be a bit miffed that my colleague didnt ask if i would be ok with it? (it was a friends baby she invited into our tiny office) probably still a bit over sensitive tbh but i know i can say im miffed on here and you will understand even though iabu Smile

mrsb0710 · 22/01/2015 18:52

I probably would have thought the same, but she maybe just didn't think about it? As we've all learnt, people sometimes just don't get how it all affects us.
I went all gooey over some baby clothes today - DH was the one who was more reserved. I'm not over it yet, but looking to the future.

gingerbreadmam · 22/01/2015 20:44

yeah i know she wouldnt have she just asks me all the time if im ok and i say no i guess ive thought too much into it and probs just doing her job.

it was fine as was completely gorgeous but i could have got a bit teary. least its confirmed that i really really do want a bfp Grin

mrsb0710 · 22/01/2015 21:29

We will most definitely both get our BFP ginger. We'll be here for the hand holding through it all :)

Imscarlet · 22/01/2015 21:52

Big unmumsnetty hugs for you all tonight!

gingerbreadmam · 23/01/2015 08:29

aww thabks scarlett and mrsb yes we will.

mrsb0710 · 23/01/2015 15:20

Just received the letter from work. It says my resignation is accepted with immediate affect. So that means I don't have to go back? Need to check with HR to see if I'm owed holiday pay.
Feel sad, but relieved, and glad I put it all in writing. It wont change the culture at work, but at least I've told them.
Onwards and upwards!

gingerbreadmam · 23/01/2015 15:36

mrsb you are doing very well with it all. it does sound like u dont have to go back which must be a relief. definitely onwards and upwards.

think u deserve a nice glass of something alcoholic tonite to celebrate Wine

Imscarlet · 23/01/2015 20:28

MrsB, this is a defining moment for you. Your life is about to get a lot better. It's only when you leave a toxic workplace that you realise how damaging it actually is. I wish you every success! Flowers

mrsb0710 · 23/01/2015 20:42

Thank you ladies, I feel better about it already. Hopefully on the road to a 'normal' rhythm of life again.
DH has been home since yesterday and doesn't go back to work until Tuesday. Its been so lovely to spend time together at home, just relaxing,not worrying about hospitals, appointments etc. We really needed this time together.

gingerbreadmam · 23/01/2015 21:26

i hope you are enoying this time together mrsb u gt anything nice planned for your weekend together?

i am just having a too much wine woman moment, been thinking about it a lot lately probs because we were going to have a baby, been with dp 3 years and known him for forever. just asked him what kind of wedding he would like and he just said hes never thought about it before. i think about marrying him all the time. i know its just a man thing but i still feel a bit deflated now.

more Wine needed i think

mrsb0710 · 23/01/2015 21:34

Oh ginger,I know what its like to have woman moments. Men say stupid things sometimes!

Have another glass and chill. You know you can come on here and vent and we'll listen :)

No definite plans really - DTD is on the list though Grin

gingerbreadmam · 23/01/2015 21:38

im already seeing the funny side. as my occy health lady would say...hes only 28 its not his fault Grin

dtd is a good way to spend the weekend spesh if a baby is the reslult of it!

wonkylegs · 24/01/2015 07:32

Gingerbreadman - DH & I will have been married 9 yrs this year and I can still remember how much he cared about the details of our wedding (really not bothered - 'you arrange it and I'll turn up') but on the day he was more emotional than I was.

wonkylegs · 24/01/2015 08:42

Meeting my friends baby was fine but I'm currently sitting on a train to London next to a lady with a baby and I'm finding it very hard. She's lovely, the baby is lovely but being trapped here with them is heart wrenching. It's going to be a hard couple of hours

gingerbreadmam · 24/01/2015 09:39

oh wonky im here if you need to get it all of your chest on the journey.

i think its the trapped bit and its a long time to have it on your mind. keep mumsnetting for a distraction.

good to hear about your dh bit of reassurance for me Grin

mrsb0710 · 25/01/2015 14:53

Hi ladies. How is everyone? How did you get on Wonky? I imagine I'd feel quite trapped as well. Forget sometimes how the little things impact us.

Handed in my staff pass today, feel relieved. Also found out some very nasty,.personal things that have been said by management about people who have /are resigning. Disgusting really, and even more glad that I'm out of there!

I've run out of conception vitamins,but I have some well woman stashed away. Do you think these are ok? I'm just worried as they contain evening primrose oil and I've heard conflicting reports. Wont be able to get proper pregnancy vitamins until Monday week.

fromwesttoeast · 26/01/2015 23:02

Hi everyone, hope you all ok. I've been reading but not had anything to add. My mc seems so far away now, like it was years ago. My second AF post mc arrived today! On schedule which is something to be glad for.
Life just rushes on really!
Best wishesFlowers

PassTheGinBottle · 27/01/2015 08:52

Hi ladies. It's me, also know as flying spud and ginface.

Life is cruel...after finding out all was well at my follow up scan and seeing the heartbeat, I bled over the weekend and found out yesterday our baby has died. Waiting for the inevitable now. Devastating but deep down I knew this pregnancy wasn't right. Right from the start.

How are you all? Sending much love ThanksThanksThanks

gingerbreadmam · 27/01/2015 09:08

oh gosh gin i am so sorry this has happened to you. i really thought everything would be well.

how are you doing?

PassTheGinBottle · 27/01/2015 09:55

Hi ginger. It's funny - lots of people have said they thought I'd be fine, but I guess these things happen and it wasn't meant to be. I'm sad but for me, knowing it's over is easier to deal with mentally than not knowing what's going on.

Xx

gingerbreadmam · 27/01/2015 10:02

i must admit there kind of is a sense of relief once you know even when it is bad news.

still so awful for you though to think you had that reassurance and now you have to get used to this now.

has the mc happened or are you waiting for it? i do hope u r ok. on a plus note i am feeling lots better now than in the beginning so time really is a healer here Thanks

fromwesttoeast · 27/01/2015 10:06

Sorry to hear your news GinFace. It's strange but I also felt something was wrong with two of my mc pregnancies. I rate instinct very highly.
Hope you are coping ok.