total headwreck, empty sac 11 days ago, embryo 6wk there today...

[SuperGlue]

It was very hard to put this into a title but basically I had a dating scan 11 days ago when i reckoned i ought to have been 9 weeks pg. In the scan there was an empty embryonic sac measuring 7 wks but no yolk or fetal pole. The sonographer said it was most likely a miscarriage but that I would need to come back in 10 days to see if there was any growth during that time as a protocol.

I have spent the past 11 days in total turmoil and limbo. Waiting any moment to miscarry etc.

Went back today for the second scan expecting to be taken in this week for a d&c only to find that the sac had grown in the 10 days and there was now a yolk, fetal pole and an embryo measuring just 6 weeks. No heartbeat but she said heartbeat would kick in, if it was going to, over the next 7 days. SO basically she could not confirm that it was a miscarriage at this stage but that we would need to go back this day next week to see if there is a heartbeat. If not it will be confirmed then.

She was fairly certain that there was a problem with the development of this pregnancy and that the most likely scenario would be that it would develop this far and trail off and we would not find a heartbeat on Monday.

I just can't get my head around it all. Even if my dates were out a bit, I didn't think it was possible to be out that much.

Has anyone else ever gone through this?

I feel like my head is about to explode trying to take it all in / work it all out and another 7 days waiting stretches out in front of me..........

hi gin face,thank you for your lovely msg. was there any reason you had a scan or was it just for your own peace of mind?

that is only a few days to be out by, i wouldnt worry too much just yet i dont think. i think before 7 weeks it isnt always easy to pick up a heartbeat. infact if you google development for a 5+ whaever day your sonographer said you were it will tell you all about the hearbeat etc.

are yu sure of your conception date? dp and i dtd regularly and im not very clued up with my cycle so i could never have pinpointed the exact day i conceived.

quick google says baby heart starts to develop in week 5 so if you were only 5+6 you wouldnt necessarily see a hb that is quite normal.

Hello gingerbread and thank you so much for your kind messages.

I have been doing a lot of googling (sigh) and you are right; the sonographer said if I were a few days out then this is exactly what we should expect to see and the pregnancy was normal. However I'm fairly sure of my dates. I just don't know.

No idea how I'm going to make it until Friday. The one thing I'm hanging on to is that I have been feeling very nauseous over the past couple of days.

are u sure because of ur cycle or because of when you dtd? if it were dtd then im sure i read sperm can live inside you for 5 days combined with the fact that not all babies develop at the same rate i really think this early on if you have no other signs of a mc i really wouldnt worry too much.

easier said than done i know.

fwiw i had experienced spotting which led to me having my early scan at 9wks and i know a lot of other ladies on the thread had something that caused them to worry (altho there are a few that made it to their 12 wks scan).

did you say you are booked for another scan? if so and you can manage it give yourself between now and then to think you are still pregnant and treat your body that way too just incase all is well!

Sorry, I should have said I had the scan for peace of mind (ha) rather than for any medical reason. I'd had one with DS so just booked one without really thinking. Regretting that now...

I'm sure (I think...) because of when we DTD but for the few months previously my cycles were slightly longer than usual, by three to four days. I'm hoping I may have ovulated and conceived later than I thought.

Sorry for bothering you all with this and thank you for taking the time to reply.

And the sonographer said exactly the same, gingerbread - to treat myself like a 'precious pregnant person' so I've just taken my vitamins and resisted the temptation to hit the wine, which would be my normal reaction in most stressful situations.

dont be silly ginface i just wouldnt want you worrying uneccesarily. ahh see long cycles could just be that. i actually thought u couldnt have private scans till 8 weeks but maybe i had read it is best to wait till 8 weeks as i imagine that is a good point to be able to see the hb etc.

also the advice your sonograper gave feels quite positive to me, i know even when mmc is diagnosed they always rescan after 1-2 wks to confirm. my sonographer pretty uch told me at first scan it was definitely mms. i cnt remember without reading back through but think that was a case with a lot of us. basically what i am trying to say is i think experienced sonographers probs av a good idea from what the see and the fact yours is so positive is also a good thing.

definitely steer clear of the wine for now ha and i shall keep my fingers tightly crossed for you. weve waited all this thread for someone to have good news and i hope hope hope its you!

I everyone, I thought i would post on here as currently going through a touch time. I am about 6 wks pregnant and went to EPU with pink spotting on tue (the exact same thing I had early on with my mmc on sep which only lasted a couple of days at the time so I didn't call mw) which left me quite upset as it seemed to be a repeat of last time.
On internal exam I had a cervical ectropion/erosion which could be explanation for blood but would have scan to check baby ok.
I was starting to feel positive again as this was not diagnosed with my mmc so was thinking it could be ok this time. Then I got my bloods result back later that day and they were very low at 821 (found this out from lots of googling). As this was below 1000 they wouldn't scan so repeated bloods 2 days later and they were practically the same so said mc was likely. I've had them done again today and they have risen slightly to 967 so I'm now having a scan on tue.
I had already accepted a mc when I got the blood results (I think part of me was already expecting this might happen after last time so hasn't been a massive shock) but was at least hoping my levels would drop and it would happen naturally (I had mm last time and bled for 6 wks afterwards so don't want to go through this again).
Now though it looks like my body's not realised yet and there might be something there at the scan (given the increase in hormones). A tiny tiny part of me is hoping for a miracle and that it is just a slow starter but I know this won't happen, I just wish my body wasn't so stupid and would just end it instead of it dragging on.

flower im so sorry to hear you are finding yourself in a difficult place again. it was my first pregnancy i didnt even get as far as a blood test with mine so i dont know about hormone levels etc.

i would just focus on getting to the scan and seeing the outcome there for now. you will know more then.

my mmc was discovered at 9wks. things had stopped progressing at 5wks. i waited until 13wks to mc naturally and it didnt happen. think jus wanted to warn you your body can hold on for a long time. although tbh about a wk after fist scan so say 10wk my pg symptoms had died down massively.

hope youre ok

I agree with Ginger that your situation looks quite positive GinFace. The sonographers are usually very cautious, whereas yours seemed hopeful. That's a good sign.

Sorry for your situation Flower. My mc have also been very long and drawn out. If the worst is confirmed you can request intervention from the hospital to sort things out more quickly.
However rising hormones is usually a positive sign. Actual levels of hormone are not so important I think. I had very high levels in this latest mc. 23000. But it was still an early mc, empty sacs. Whether they rise or fall is more important I think. Mine fell slightly.

Aw Flower, I'm sorry you have to join us. I can't advise you on levels. I have a vague recollection that they should be doubling daily. My first and second pregnancies ended in m/c. I nearly found the first one easier to deal with as it could have been random, the second was a rea blow because I felt that the issue was to do with me. Long story short, I had it investigated, found I was low in progesterone and had a successful pregnancy with medication. For the last 4 years I was the one with the happy ending. Until I ended up here of course. I'm going to go the medicated route again next time. I just wanted you to know that the fact that you are getting pregnant is really positive and there are options. Hope you are ok

So sorry that you ladies are in limbo, it is the worst time, not knowing.

Just know that we are here for you - whatever the outcomes may be. Crossing fingers and sending thoughts your way.
This thread has gotten us all through some really tough times, don't be afraid to vent/ask questions.
and thinking of you.

Thank you mrsb. You are all so kind.

I've now found out that night times are shit...laid awake for hours.

I'm out the other side. AF arrived this morning. Bit of a surprise really as its bang on 28 days and I only ovulated a week ago which suggests that my hormones are all over the shop. Ginger, I know you were wondering about waiting a cycle, well I can categorically say that if we tried this month it would not have been successful. Everyone is different though and I do know lots of people who didn't wait and got a happy ending. Hope you are all doing ok today. We are off to the panto, which seems weird at this stage as Christmas seems so long ago, but hey ho! 'He's behind you!!'

Welcome to the thread Gin and Flower, sorry you're both going through this.

I'm not sure what's going on with my body at the moment. My miscarriage was just over a month ago and since the heavy bleeding finished I've continued to have bloody mucus on wiping, sometimes quite a lot. A few days ago I had strong cramps and wondered if my period was starting. A while later, on wiping there was fresh blood and a 20p sized clot. Since then it's gone back to just the bloody mucus.
I'm worried incase there's still some retained tissue (pregnancy test is negative though) or I have an infection (no temperature or other signs of infection). DH wants me to go back to the hospital but I don't see the point. They struggled to even see the baby properly on my scan at 11 weeks because my uterus is tilted at such an awkward angle, so they definitely wouldn't be able to see what's going on in there now. They've already said that I can't have an ERPC because my womb is too damaged so I don't know what they could do anyway and I don't want to take anymore time off work and my hospital is an hours drive each way. I'm hoping it will all settle down soon and it's simply the tail end of the miscarriage but I am worried incase it's not.

does sound like could have been retained tissue chubby but odd though with you getting negative tests. if you feel ok in yourself maybe just ring the hospital for their advice?

i thought i was getting my period the other day id had sharp pains in one side like when you ovulate then a few days later started with 'pink wee'. jusr wore panty liner until period kicked in but it hasnt come. i did have stuff on liner but not a lot the liner was enough for it. could it have been a very light period or just stuff from erpc? i stopped bleeding christmas eve following erpc which was done on 14 december and was for retained products. any ideas anyone?

Thanks for all your kind comments and sorry for your losses as well.

chubby with my last mc I bled for 6 weeks after, a few times it looked like the bleeding had stopped, then I would get cramps and have a bout of heavier fresh bleeding again, often with clots. I think sometimes some pieces can get embedded in your lining and your body just keeps trying to get rid of them. I think a negative test is a good sign that everything has cleared and if you feel well and there is no unpleasant smell then unlikely to be infection.
When I went back with bleeding they examined me and did swabs, eventually doing a scan which showed it was all gone but I still bled for a couple of weeks after this as they said I had a thick lining. I know how you feel about not wanting to go to hospital, I was so fed up of being prodded and poked I just wanted to be left alone and didn't feel it would help anyway. How long is it since your bleeding finished? Could be it's your period.

My first period was after a month of non bleeding and I had spotting first, then normalish period. When I googled this lots cam up about low progesterone which got me worried but told myself it was probably just hormones from cm and would be ok. Now I've miscarried again though I wonder if it could have played a part...
I feel more angry than upset this time (last time found out at scan 11+5 baby had died 8+5 and opted for mm), I think it's coz it's happened a 2nd time and because it looks like it's going to be a drawn out and painful process. This sounds so awful and I don't want to cause offence to anyone but I wish it would have happened naturally back at 4-5 wks instead of dragging on.

Hello Flower29 and ginface so sorry to see you have had to join us here but you are welcome iykwim?

I can't believe this thread is still going. So sad to think of so many of us all i the same dreadful boat.

chubby what a worry. It is such a pity we are designed the way we are and that we can't see inside to see if all is ok or not. I had a couple of clots following the MC and the period I had over christmas was very very heavy and full of clots which is unusual for me (sorry for tmi) I was a bit concerned about it tbh but it ran its course in a similar time-frame to a normal period so I have let it be for now. I reckon I OV'd this weekend (had a sharpish pain low left side) but for various reasons we did not dtd to guess I have missed the boat this month. Dh is still hesitant about it all (trying again, not dtd!) We'll see what happens next month. My parents are still being massively insensitive about my sisters pregnancy and I am finding it upsetting every time I speak to them on the phone. I thin it is my problem though, they are not going to change and I am going to have to find a way to cope mentally with it for my own mental health!

Ginger hope you are doing ok? Hi to everyone else x

Flower, I feel similarly. My latest mc stopped developing at 4-5 weeks. I wonder why it wasn't just a chemical pg. On the other hand I think that the fact our bodies hang on well suggests we are able to keep a pregnancy, but unfortunately the egg this time had an abnormality, which would be why it mc.
I don't know much about it, but this is what I've come to think.

Thank you so much, superglue.

I have positive moments and really shit moments.

Is it weird that I think I'm more scared of being told I've miscarried than actually dealing with the reality?

How is everyone else?

Hi ladies. I'm sorry we're all still going through our own physical/mental struggles, but we stick together and its so nice when we can help each other out.

I'm back at work tomorrow, have worked myself up about it all weekend. Silly really. They cant beat me down much more emotionally/mentally, and I've been through worse so I figure stick it to them. I'm requesting a meeting first thing tomorrow to discuss a phased return to work and will tell them I need support still. I'm ok to be at work, just fragile still.

On a better note, DH and I DTD last night, first time in about 2 months, with the morning sickness I had, and then everything else falling apart.
I was nervous it was going to be different, or hurt, but all ok. Felt a bit bruised today, but nice to have that physical closeness again, and not stress yet about TTC.

Thinking of you ladies who are still awaiting news, let us know how it all goes and we shall be here for you.

I'll update from work tomorrow, and hopefully not from home if I've told them to stick their job. Haha..just thinking of pay day..one foot in front of the other.

Good luck tomorrow mrsb.

I'm putting the kettle on (wish it was a bottle of gin)...anyone for a cuppa?

mrsb have you considered getting your GP to sign you off for phased return? That way your employers have no choice really but to comply and go along with what you want... Are they being complete tw@ts about the whole thing? (Apologies if you've already gone through this, I haven't read all of the earlier posts) I am still off sick from my last mc and was going to go back on phased return at the end of jan but now will probably have a few months off. Whilst they have been fine in terms of not pressuring me to go back they have been shocking in communication. A couple of weeks after my last mc my boss left which meant my job was practically redundant, and all they did was suggest other roles I could do(but not what I would be doing in the meantime) I went back after a few weeks, realised I was actually quite depressed (turned up at work and had to twiddle my thumbs as there wasn't really a job anymore) so went off sick again. In those few months the only communication I have had is from hr to acknowledge my sick note and responding to my complaints. Sorry this is completely off topic but one mention of work and I had to rant! mrsb is it possible for you to take more time off? I know this can be hard sometimes with pay etc, although I read someone comment somewhere recently that mc doesn't count toward normal sick leave...? No idea if this is true tho. I hope it goes ok tomorrow for you. One thing I have learnt from having a mc is what's important in life and that I can no longer be bothered to put up with tw@ts!

flower - I had 1 week off due to severe morning sickness, and then 3 weeks for MMC and ERPC. I need to go back financially and just to deal with the situation.
Plan is to work for as long as I can and start looking elsewhere. They are twats and have been for a long while, and I know it won't get better.

Definitely need to do what's best for myself, DH, and starting our family. Don't need the added stress and pressure of people who just don't care.
deep breaths