total headwreck, empty sac 11 days ago, embryo 6wk there today...

[SuperGlue]

It was very hard to put this into a title but basically I had a dating scan 11 days ago when i reckoned i ought to have been 9 weeks pg. In the scan there was an empty embryonic sac measuring 7 wks but no yolk or fetal pole. The sonographer said it was most likely a miscarriage but that I would need to come back in 10 days to see if there was any growth during that time as a protocol.

I have spent the past 11 days in total turmoil and limbo. Waiting any moment to miscarry etc.

Went back today for the second scan expecting to be taken in this week for a d&c only to find that the sac had grown in the 10 days and there was now a yolk, fetal pole and an embryo measuring just 6 weeks. No heartbeat but she said heartbeat would kick in, if it was going to, over the next 7 days. SO basically she could not confirm that it was a miscarriage at this stage but that we would need to go back this day next week to see if there is a heartbeat. If not it will be confirmed then.

She was fairly certain that there was a problem with the development of this pregnancy and that the most likely scenario would be that it would develop this far and trail off and we would not find a heartbeat on Monday.

I just can't get my head around it all. Even if my dates were out a bit, I didn't think it was possible to be out that much.

Has anyone else ever gone through this?

I feel like my head is about to explode trying to take it all in / work it all out and another 7 days waiting stretches out in front of me..........

mrsb hope u r ok. at this time of year so much going around its hard to say if they are related or not but best to get checked to be on the safe side. let us know how u get on.

west i really do hope that is it for u. hopefully after seeing the scan the medicals know what they r on about and things r progressing as well as they can.

West, I hope that was it for you but I agree that you should be prepared for sudden bleeding.
MrsB I hope you're feeling a bit better today and get clarification one way or the other very soon.

I can't believe it's Christmas Eve today. The house is looking christmassy, the presents are all wrapped and food and drink have been stocked up but I'm just not feeling it.

Crawled into my bed at around 2am, the doctor I saw was lovely, couldn't do much for me, but did an internal exam. Said the symptoms could be the start of a miscarriage, or my IBD flaring. No real answers, but at least I got seen. Useless nurse though, had 4 goes at getting blood before DH was about ready to knock him.out. Bruises all.over my arm and back of hand today. Ouch.

Headed to EPAU appointment now, feel physically ill, just want this over.

Waiting for your news Mrsb. Hoping for you.

Thinking of you today MrsB.

aww chubby i hope the festivites catch up with u and take over for a day or for a nice distraction.

thinking of you mrsb.

Chubby for what it's worth I feel a bit hollow this Christmas too. You are not on your own.

Confirmed MMC, ERPC booked 31 Dec. In some ways just relieved it will be over soon.

so sorry mrs b! terrible news. was this your first pregnancy? it was mine too.

for reasaurance, if i ever have the misfortune of this happening to me again i would fight for the erpc after everything that went wrong for me the erpc was over quickly and it was good to know.it was over if that makes sense. so sorry.

So sorry MrsB. Bloody awful day to get the news. If you have any questions about ERPC please feel free to ask.

Thank you ladies, the support from here has been truly appreciated.
The EPAU staff were lovely and it was all my decision. Hoping 2015 is a better year.
Definitely not how I imagined my first pregnancy ending, but we can now focus on trying again soon.
Really want to ignore Christmas, just don't have the effort to even pretend right now.
to you all feeling the same way and again thank you. I shall update on how things go

So sorry that you had bad news Mrsb. Take care of yourself. It's good you are able to look ahead to trying again. I hope we all have better times next year.

Happy Christmas you bunch of Internet strangers who have become very dear to me. I hope that we will all get through tomorrow unscathed and look forward to a fresh start in 2015 for us all.

Agreed scarlet raising a glass of red to you strong, amazing, fantastic women.

Evening all, mrsb I am sos so sorry, you are having such a tough time at THE worst time of the year. You are in my thoughts x

west I too have everything crossed that it is over for you (that sounds awful, but you know what I mean!).

I agree - I posted here as a terrified, falling to pieces wreck and I did not expect to get the level of support that I did, I cannot thank you each enough, you have been a real life line. I feel so sad that we have all had such a dreadful experience but so glad to have 'met' you all. Cheers to us. And to all those tiny unborn babies who will live forever in our hearts, thinking of them this Christmas Eve xxxxx

Ahhh you've all made me tear up again. Agree you have all been wonderful in making a unbearable month or so bearable. I really don't know what I would have done without you all. Internet strangers you may be but you have shared an important struggle with me and for that I raise my final glass of plum brandy (for tonight) to you all.Thank you all so much.

I'm so sorry MrsB.

I hope you all have a good day today, or as good as it can be anyway. x

Happy christmas to you all! The best thing we ever did was put off all visitors /guests this year. It is so much more relaxing for me anyway. We have opened the presents, had a full cooked breakfast, drunk a bottle of cava in buck fizz and we're relaxing now before I start cooking the dinner, we will eat at about 6.30 / 7pm.

Hope you ladies are all surviving the day ok and being looked after well? I had a little cry about what should be been last night and felt better then xxx

2015 is just around the corner and is a new start for all of us! I will be looking forward to seeing all the new announcements in the coming months x

DH is at work, and I'm glad I decided to stay home with the puppy instead of going to the in laws by myself. Still in my pyjamas, watching DVDs and eating chocolate. Nice little cocoon before facing the real world on the weekend.
I've been looked after and had some lovely messages from.close friends.
Still feel emotionally drained, but looking forward to 2015 and hopefully better times.
Hugs and to you all.

good afternoon ladies, just wanted to drop a little msg as i have been thinking of you all over the last few days.

hope everyone has managed to have a lovely christmas and it has provided a good distraction to you all. i hope you have received some lovely presents to cheer you up after all the crap you have been through these last couple of months.

i went to church christmas eve, it was a beautiful crib service every other carol almost had me in floods as they all refer to the birth of a baby but i kept it together, it was a nice service and i lit a candle for what could have been.

i saw an uncle i hadnt seen since it all happened yesterday and he had heard along the grapevine, he had just been in hospital himself due to a mini stroke so i asked how he was and he said no how are you, i am so sorry. made me realise how big it is what weve all been through really! that was the only time i really thought about it yesterday which is good though, i hope it wasnt too bad for everyone else and i hope you are all enjoying yourselves in some way and seen as tho we are now allowed

HI ginger glad to hear you made it through the day. The church service sounds nice and I found it very nice to light a candle for what should have been too when I was in a church last week.

I hope everyone else has had as ok a christmas as possible given the circumstances. I felt emotional and a bit teary / stressed on christmas eve and I did have a little cry at one stage which released the tension in me a bit. But yesterday I was good I enjoyed the day with just dh and dd and was very very glad it was just the 3 of us this year. Spoke to my mum and sister and they both rubbed me up the wrong way for various reasons, though most likely it is me being sensitive (mum asked how I was 'doing', I said 'ok' (very non-commital) and she said 'physically are you ok, no pains etc? I said no all ok that way but harder emotionally to which she replied by launching into a story about my cousins adult daughters sore throat and how it nearly ruined christmas for them (daughter is 24) and how she was texting this daughter etc. And that was the end of that conversation about how I was doing....

Anyway, still in pjs here, eating rubbish, drinking wine and very glad of the peace and quite xx

oh gosh super ur mam sounds just like mine. she has barely spoken to me about it since it happened. in fact walking round matalan the other day we came to the baby section and she said eee we should have been buying these now. just like that. youd think as they are parents they would have some idea what we have been through but it seems not!

im glad you got through yesterday ok that is something. i think crying when u need to does u the world of good so dont hold it in! sounds like u are having fun today.

Hi ladies.
Glad I'm not the only one who was an emotional wreck in church. It was lovely to go though and although I'm not very religious, it did give some peace.

Agreed on the people annoying me front - some just don't get it. Id rather them just say - I'm here for you if you need it - then be awkward, or get annoyed that I've not been chatty. Give me a freaking break.

Physically I'm ok, no sign of things progressing on their own - lower back pain and exhausted but nothing else.
DH has Wednesday off for my surgery but has to go to work the day after. Dreading it, but they are aware and he can come home if I need him.

I'm nervous about going back to work as most people knew, and its going to be tough. Management have been a bit of an arse about it, but that's a fight for another day. I know I have to go back for normality, but I just don't have the motivation right now.

I think we have decided to wait a cycle and try again straight away if we can. Another baby will not ever replace what we've lost, but I so want to be a mum.

Hugs to you all, and glad we got through Christmas in one piece.

we all sound the same mrsb dont we? good though that we can share our frustrations and let go on here to people that understand.

do you have anyone who can spend the day with you after the op? i think from my experience u will be ok but tired and it will be helpful to have someone who can run around after you if possible?

how long are you off after op before returning to work? with how mine happened i have fell lucky with a big break but if it hadnt fell like that i think i would have taken a week off ill as i was so tired (but i was / am anaemic to, dont know if that affected it). anyway just a little of my experience to help you out if needs be.

bugga work btw the they can get stuffed im sure if anything happened they wouldnt have a leg to stand on.

glad to hear ur trying again, it was ny first pregnancy too and almost 2 weeks now since my ERPC. we are going to wait until ive at least had a negative test and then hopefully till after first period but see how things go.

Hi ginger

I'm thinking DH will probably go to work and I can ring him to come home. His manager is really understanding, but for those higher up, I think he has to be seen nit to be favouring anyone. My in laws don't live close and there's no one else really. Think I'll just make sure I have food cooked ready to heat up and pain killers and a hot water bottle to hand. Did you bleed a lot or like a heavy period?
Did they say how long it should take to get a negative test?

Had the worst lower back pain today and have been so emotional, just frustrated that I don't feel like doing anything.

I have until Monday the 5th off, I've had 2 weeks already. If I'm not ready, I wont go back, or I'll ask for reduced hours.

Off to visit the in laws tomorrow - going to need all the strength I have to get through that.