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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Recurrent Miscarriage Support - tests, treatment, trying again - thread 12

978 replies

bakingtins · 13/09/2014 20:32

Welcome everyone! A thread for anyone who has suffered recurrent losses and is in need of support, information, moral support or tea and sympathy. Newbies very welcome.

Please can we start (as is traditional) with a recap of where we are on 'the journey'.

OP posts:
jennywren1970 · 15/09/2014 19:38

Anyone want to nominate a date to meet in Bristol? Im flexible days or evenings except 15th-25th Oct.
Nice to meet you all btw.

Ididntseeitsoitdidnthappen · 15/09/2014 19:46

If I attend a meet it has to be a weekend I'm afraid as I'm a full time worker. I can do London or Bristol - I'm awesome like that Grin

Ididntseeitsoitdidnthappen · 15/09/2014 19:50

But if you guys can only do weekdays then don't worry

Justonemoretime · 15/09/2014 19:58

I'm one for weekends only, too. London is best for me Grin

Boozle80 · 15/09/2014 20:00

Hey All, I feel left out! Does anyone live up North? I feel lonely - mainly because coffee and cake sounds amazing!
I forgot to add my stats:
DD Oct 2009
TTC since Sep 13
MC#1 Jan 14 - 6 weeks (natural)
MMC #2 - March 14 - 12 weeks (ERPC) haemorrhaged and 2nd ERPC in April
MMC #3 - August 14 - 10 weeks - ERPC

Boozle80 · 15/09/2014 20:01

Although I could road trip to London if I need to! Love an adventure!

Bristolian1 · 15/09/2014 20:03

Sorry you had such a rubbish time at the specialist ididnt it sounds really frustrating. Are you going to complain/go back to your GP?

Bristolian1 · 15/09/2014 20:04

Bristol peeps evenings and weekends are best for me for a meet up as I work full time

Aoifebelle · 15/09/2014 20:08

Well, feint bfp on saturday accompanies by the usual pregnancy symptoms of unquenchable thirst and sore tits. AF came today, so looks like a chemical. Pushing 40 and losing hope here.

tannyLoo · 15/09/2014 20:22

Aoif don't lose hope! If I can get there, there is hope for us all... I'm so sorry AF arrived, it is shit. Big hugs and a large Wine if it helps.

bakingtins · 15/09/2014 20:24

ididnt that sounds really crap. I'm so sorry they were so dismissive. Angry
FWIW the standard blood tests will bring up a problem about 50% of the time (so thyroid disease, diabetes, PCOS, APS/ clotting, autoimmune disease) A scan is normally performed, and if you haven't had a successful pregnancy hysterosalpingogram and checks of cervix as well. St Mary's have been saying 40% of RM patients have had 3MC due to abnormal embryo/foetus chromosomes ( I'd love to know based on what evidence when they won't tests products until MC3) but the majority of those defects arise spontaneously and the parental karyotyping is normal - but you don't know without checking it. If either parent has a abnormal karyotyping then genetic counselling is offered.
If you're in the normal 50% then it's pretty standard to be sent to try again with some 'just in case' meds. The better RM clinics now tend to only prescribe aspirin for specific clotting defects, it's contraindicated if clotting is normal as it can interfere with implantation. At that point you have to decide if you are up for trying again or if you want to look into the immune stuff privately. It's so useful to get products tested! it's the one thing that tells you if you really have been unlucky and you are just waiting for that perfect embie or if there is truly a problem of some sort with you.
I hope you get some answers despite the crap appointment and if not, that the GP can help you progress things somewhere else.

OP posts:
bakingtins · 15/09/2014 20:26

Bristol peeps, evenings and weekends good for me. Happy to host a meet if you want to use our house, or could do somewhere in town and wear a red rose!

OP posts:
bakingtins · 15/09/2014 20:27

aoife cross posts! I'm so sorry Sad

OP posts:
Boozle80 · 15/09/2014 20:27

That's shit Aoife. Are you ok? It's all so blooming frustrating isn't it? Ididnt definitely ask for another referral - the best thing I ever did was to walk out of our local hospital and self referred to someone we felt a) gave a damn and b) we trust are doing their best for us. We don't have any answers yet but I have confidence that, if they can, they will find them.

bakingtins · 15/09/2014 20:30

Aoife have you considered going to the implantation clinic? Probably not what you want to think about right now, but bear it in mind.

OP posts:
charlieis30 · 15/09/2014 20:40

Why the hell is everyone in Location Location Location either pregnant, or pregnant then MC? Tears ahoy. But I love that show. I would have a full-on saddo giggle fit if I met either Phil or Kirstie!

charlieis30 · 15/09/2014 20:41

boozle you make me want to road (well, train) trip up north. I have never been anywhere between London and Edinburgh (gulp)

Sruddy1 · 15/09/2014 20:52

Hi all sorry haven't messaged in a while turns out I got an infection after the ERPC last week so have been laid up in bed all week! Went to see a TCM who diagnosed me with a "cold uterus" has anyone heard of this? She said that my uterus is not warm enough for a pregnancy to survive resulting in early pregnancy loss. She gave me herbal medicines to take which I have started.. Feel a bit vulnerable at the moment like I'd believe anything if that makes sense? Although some of the things she did say were spot on.

Bristolian1 · 15/09/2014 21:01

Sorry to hear your news aoife I hope you're ok. Sending hugs Flowers

charlieis30 · 15/09/2014 21:15

sruddy as a fellow TCM'er I haven't heard it... although mine is evidently some issue with warmth in my stomach. I've been told to eat a lot of soups and they use a heat lamp on my belly when I get my acupuncture. I don't know if your TCM practitioner is actually Chinese but mine is and can be a bit blunt (I blame the accent).. I've been in floods of tears once or twice when they've suggested that I won't be able to get preg again until I'm "fixed" (and they have the means to fix me, what a coincidence! I go because it makes me feel like I'm doing something, and I'm certainly doing better in both mental & physical stability/strength since I've been going. I have been taking the herbals as well as my normal prenatal vit. Hope it works for us xx

twilightstruggle · 15/09/2014 21:18

Aoife - really sorry to hear that. Its rubbish and frustrating.

Ididn't - that's absolutely appalling. For what its worth I got a referral to St Mary's from Essex so it might be possible for you too. My GP is scared of me though (he seems the flighty type as opposed to me being scary imo) so I don't know how representative that is of other GP practices. St Mary's doesn't do chromosome testing though - at least it hasn't for us.

Sruddy sorry to hear you've been ill. Never heard of a 'cold uterus' before but then I don't know anything about TCM. I know what you mean about feeling vulnerable - I feel about ready to try anything.

Re. meeting up - I can do London or Essex/Cambs. I work full time but the lack of children makes me flexible in the evenings or at weekends (positive reframe). There's also a slight chance I'll be able to do Bristol as am a p/t student at the Uni there so I'm there every now and again.

Just I'm two weeks post septum op and am still getting very brief but quite painful stabby pains in my uterus and, I think, my cervix (not sure, I have a naïve lack of familiarity with my nether regions). Did you experience anything like that. They're a bit like period pains but more stabby and sudden.

twilightstruggle · 15/09/2014 21:20

Just - sorry, just re-read that. Obviously its very personal and you don't have to say if you don't want to!! Blush

Boozle80 · 15/09/2014 21:22

Oooo, Charlie do it! I'm based where they film Last of the Summer Wine so you may even be able to see old men flying down a hill I a bath...

cloudjumper · 15/09/2014 21:31

aoife So so sorry, that's just cruel. Be kind to yourself. It's a long road... Was this your first chemical? Look after yourself, and have a think about baking's advice with the implantation clinic.

sruddy I went to see a accupuncturist last year, and what you say sounds vaguely familiar. I didn't have the hot or cold problem, my problem apparently is/was issues with blood stasis something or other... Which is not far off, since I've had a DVT in the past, which still impacts on me being pg! Although I do believe in the benefits of acupuncture (it stopped my migraines), I am a bit weary of the herbal teas - simply because it's not know what is in them, and they can be powerful. I decided against going down the TCM route at the time, but mainly because I didn't click with the lady, she was so very focused on sorting out my cycles, whereas I wanted relaxation and help with staying pg. She also said that if I do the teas, I shouldn't get pg, so that was an immediate no for me. But if you feel you would benefit in any way, even 'just' to make you feel better, why not give it a try?

ididn't Please complain, that is just awful! Junior doctors need to learn, but certainly not like this! Get in touch with PALS, they are very good. As if things aren't stressful enough for you already!

If there is a meet-up in London, I could come, too - no biggie getting a train from Cambridge. But evenings and weekends for me only, full-time worker here.

I'm in a foul mood... Biting poor DH's head of at any opportunity, the poor man can't even do a simple joke any more without me going all snappy and huffy. I'm blaming my cold. Off to bed soon, I am so so tired....

Justonemoretime · 15/09/2014 22:11

Hi Twilight, sorry its uncomfortable. Mine was OK, as I recall, but I guess we're all different. Maybe see your GP? Could be a slight infection? Is there any discharge? Hope it settles down soon. x