Recurrent miscarriage testing and beyond.. Part 6.. Over here!

[orangebowl]

We have filled up the last thread so here is the next.. Deep breath and grit your teeth for the roller coaster of emotions that continues... Hope tea and butterfly and all find it!

Apologies for sudden absence, internet problems.

LandsN how scary, no wonder you panicked, I would. And I agree with what the others have said, that move can't have caused a mc. Remember the days when "ladies" were "confined"? If that really helped we would still be doing it. How hard (and frustrating as hell) to have to wait to tomorrow. I hope you're getting some rest.

Butterfly, just catching up on your news. Hope the pain isn't too bad. And you're not a cow, you're suffering, and your poor DH, hope you have had some time for a bit more cuddling.

Tea fx for the 2ww! Where are you in it?

I think I might join you, just. Got the positive opk today. I have the day off and have made a very healthy lunch and went for a gentle walk in the sunny, spring-like countryside and am now propped up and noticing the old hopeful thoughts creeping back in. I hate these mood swings but am glad for the relief of feeling shit and trying not to cry constantly. I miscarried on mothers day last year and somehow I managed to not realise that my mc didn't cancel all future mothers days and I was shocked, literally went all hot and was stunned for a moment, a couple of weeks ago when I heard that mothers day was coming up. Also, we had our consultant appt a couple of weeks ago following the post-mc tests and he said that we're healthy regarding everything they tested for. Then he asked me my age again and then told me that we are only hoping for one baby. It both angered and sadend me even though we're also thinking realistically and are only hoping for one anyway (Ok, so I'm secretly hoping for twins but still I did not like him saying it!).

Hope scan goes well tomorrow School! I didn't know that rule about mw's and heartbeats. I suppose it would be possibly quite worrying if they couldn't find it but it was there all along.

Hi twenty glad you are joining back in you must be feeling better than you did last week :) A mc is always difficult but it's especially hard when it happens on a recognised date I wonder if christmas will ever be the same for me :( saying that I will never forget "dates" now, I know all my due dates the dates of erpc's or even when I found out I was pg. I think mother's day is a bitch anyway it should be banned til we all get our babies!

Great news that your tests are normal though I know it sometimes doesn't feel like good news as it doesn't give you any answers. I think that was a bit harsh of the consultant even if he thought you should only hope for one he didn't have to say it! Hoping you get your bfp soon :)

The bleeding has stopped just a bit orangey when I wipe sorry for tmi still not holding out any hope though gp phoned and said I will have to stay under consultant even if I do mc this one to prepare for next time which made me really angry as I asked for that last time and got fobbed off got scan at 9.30 tomorrow so just going to do nothing till then, midwife said the same as u all it was just a total coincidence that the 2 things happened at same time or possibly bleed coming from somewhere else where I twisted fast and awkwardly but I am not sure where else it could come from anyway will report back as soon as I know anymore thank you all so much for your support hope u are all well xx

Oh and butterfly I know what u mean about Christmas my mc was 19/12 the day before my birthday and I was booked in for surgery Christmas Eve my first mc was the day before my nephews birthday always hard at those times x

Hi Twenty! Nice to 'see' you again. Glad you're feeling a teensy bit positive. I think its the only way to be otherwise we'd just waste all our time crying. I have been feeling quite sad on & off especially as next week was my last due date and 3 close friends have all just had their babies. However I'm trying so hard to stay busy and positive as I don't want to look back and think I just wasted however many years of my life crying. Also feel guilty for DD.

I can't believe the doctor said that to you. What a great bedside manner!! I also got the all clear from my tests so far and while that's great it's also annoying having nothing to treat. Not sure if you feel the same? But yey for the smiley face - I'm new to all this opk stuff so got v excited about my smiley face!!

Butterfly I did get a smiley! But still don't trust anything as have read you can get the surge without ovulating especially if you have pcos like I do. I got two smileys & the last one was last Thursday so does that mean I ovulated on Thursday? So will probably test next Thursday. Keep forgetting that my real worries start when I manage to get pregnant!! But can't wait to stop shagging!!!!

Tea I don't have much experience with opk's I tried them once when we first started ttc. I think you maybe did ov on thursday I'm sure the lh goes quite quickly once the egg has actually been released. You've kept shagging for longer than I would well done you lol! Nothing more you can do now so fingers crossed :)

So nervous I just know what they r going to say at scan this morn I could probably tell them what to say by now :( just want it over now hope your all well this morning xx

Holding your hand Lands xxxx

Hope you're ok Lands. Will be thinking of you. Hate scan nerves.

Thank you ladies good news we still have a baby with a strong heart beat the bleeding came from outside the sack where there is a implantation bleed to the side I can relax a bit for now have got to speak to my gp about asprin and have another scan in 2 weeks :) x

Oh Lands that's great news so pleased for you the little tinker must have been bedding right in! Have they recommended you start asprin now? I keep asking about taking it as a precaution but they are very reluctant xx

Lands that's brilliant news!!! How strange that none of us said "there is still hope, it will be ok etc etc" like there would have been on other threads I am sure- pessimistic bunch we are! And it's all fine! That's made my day 

Twenty and Tea- thinking about you in the 2WW- who on earth made it 2 weeks!? such a long time!

Butterfly hope you are managing to rest up now. re. the aspirin- it should only be taken from after BFP as otherwise they think it can hinder implantation.. i'm sure i have read that there are no negative effects to it. Worth another discussion with your consultant though. Are you happy with the consultant? seems strange she is reluctant to do tests? While you are having a break from ttc it would be a good time to get all thetests done? have you asked about being transferred to a recurrent miscarriage clinic? (sorry for all the questions!)

I had midwife appointment today- standard 16 week check where they are supposed to do just urine and blood pressure but I asked if she would listen for heartbeat and she said she would given my history.. And it was fine! Chugging away like a train!

Thank you I have to phone my gp for advice on asprin but they said they think I should I am now under constant supervision from the consultant so fingers crossed it make a difference, I told the nurse I knew I had list it when I went in so when they showed me the h/b I was in shock we have called it the tic tac as she said that's how big it is dates are a few days out but she was not worried xx

Wow Lands that's amazing!! Hooray! You're now one of these mythical people who bleeds but doesn't have a mc!! Must be such a relief and such an emotional rollercoaster!!

School you're so right! We are such doom and gloomers here aren't we?!?! Amazing news about heartbeat. I dream of midwife appointments like that... 2ww isn't too bad for me. It's the bit after that drives me potty!

School I'm pleased mw had a listen for you bet it was amazing to hear it :)
I'm ok at work as normal just feeling really tired. Keep having a bit of a wobble thinking this is it we are never going to have a baby and maybe I should just accept that. I think it's maybe because I can't help thinking something is wrong and they aren't doing anything to find it. I am happy with the consultant in that she really knows her stuff and I have faith in her but she won't do anything, she knows we are willing to pay if we have to so surely if she thought we needed it she would say go for it she said she has referred couples to rmc but is quite happy for us to stay where we are at the moment. She seems to think the problem is super fertility and my womb isn't being selective and there's nothing we can do about it except keep trying it's so frustrating!

I have still got a long way to go yet but put my minf at rrst a bit for now bit of belly ache after the horrid internal scan though x

Happiness was short lived bleeding again quite heavy spoke to epac got to go for another scan tomorrow morning to see if its coming from bleed outside the sac feel really deflated again now suppose tomorrow will tell x

Oh Lands how rubbish. I will keep everything crossed that its ok. Some women do bleed throughout pregnancy & are fine. I really hope you are one of them. Oh and in your situation I definitely would keep demanding scans! Ignore what I said yesterday!! Xx

Thanks tea can't really cope with this roller coaster of emotions just wondering if the scan could have irritated the bleed outside the sac and caused more to come away I hope that's all it is epac have been brilliant I just hope it's the same as before! Suppose only the scan will tell there was a h/b this morning so lets hope I see it again tomorrow xx

Oh bugger Lands. Try to keep positive as hard as it is it could be the rest of the bleed just coming away, I hope that's the case. Your head must be up your bum with this, praying it's ok for you xx

Oh Lands . That roller coaster is so difficult. As you said- there was a heartbeat today so extremely possible there is still one- no reason that the reason for bleeding is any different to before. Hope you can get some rest tonight. X

Yeah slightly I keep snapping at oh and he is only trying to b nice bless him going to try and stay positive till morning the doctor has prescribed me asprin so got to pick that up tomorrow if all is ok does seem the same as other day just glad they can scan me again to check or I would drive myself mad feel like a right moaner as I told epac nurse and she was really lovely fingers crossed its still ok x

Hi ladies. I'm currently in the middle of MC3. I had succesful pregnancy in 2006, MC at 10 weeks 2009, successful pregnancy 2010, MC at 8 weeks Sept 2012 and at 8 weeks now. Previously I have had no doubt about TTC again, but DH and I had agreed this was our last shot at baby 3. I'm 38 and aware that risks of miscarriage and chromosome abnormalities are only increasing with time.
I probably don't qualify for testing anyway as I had a successful pregnancy between MC1 and 2, but it does always seem to be at the same stage, so I'm worried that there is actually something wrong with me. Surely nobody is just this unlucky?
GP did TORCH testing last time because hospital got their knickers in a twist about infections then lost all the swabs, so GP redid swabs and bloods. All clear.
How likely am I to be offered any further testing? I think I'd only want to try again if something was found that was treatable, I just can't risk this happening repeatedly. It may all be for naught anyway, DH and I haven't talked about what happens next anyway but I think he may put his foot down.

Hi Baking. So sorry for your mc and welcome to the thread.

I'm in a similar position in that I had a mc then successful pregnancy then 2 mc. I underwent testing on the nhs because I saw a consultant privately and he offered to do nhs tests for me. However a GP at my practice has since said that she would have referred me anyway despite the 3 in a row rule (although not sure if the hospital would have then refused). Anyway nothing has been found and I'm now ttc again anyway (but wasted over 6 months for the testing).

Having tests is not the golden egg that I thought/hoped it would be. Karyotyping only looks for certain chromosomal abnormalities & doesn't rule out many others. If some are found then you just get a percentage chance of mc. I've also learnt that the clotting tests are notoriously difficult to carry out and often give false negatives. So not really sure where I stand. But I guess what I'm saying is that even if you can get some testing you may not get any answers or a 'cure'. There are loads of other tests available but usually privately or through the specialist hospitals (in which case you would need 3 mc in a row I think).

Hope this doesn't sound too doom & gloom. I think you still have a good chance of having a baby as you've done it twice before. If you really want testing see your GP and they maybe able to sort something out for you. I know how raw emotions are during a mc and how desperate you are to sort things out. Give yourself time to process everything.

Thank you teaandchocolate. I know it's not that likely that anything would be found. I think at the moment I feel like I couldn't embark on another pregnancy given my 40% success rate unless I could be doing something that would increase those chances. Need to get through this and have a talk with DH anyway about what happens in the future.
I've got Lesley Regan's book - I remember reading it after 1st MC and thinking that most of the chapters (on recurrent miscarriage) would never apply to me as I was just unlucky that time. I'll dig it out.