had a miscarriage? waiting to get back to normal to TTC? come join us..

[tedmundo]

There are so many of us in that we deserve a thread....

MC and waiting to get the cycle back to normal before TTC....

Come here to share the stories of never ending bleeding, praying for BFN's and the return of the lovely AF in all her glory!

Thanks teaandchocolate :) I can't decide which is best but it irks me that others have a firm view one way or the other. And also, people say things that are rubbish because they don't know what to say.

Neither is best, they're both rubbish! However if it wasn't for my first mc I wouldn't have my dd...so hopefully soon I'll be able to find something positive in this one. I'm the meantime I'm going to start drinking wine again!

Good idea. Enjoy :)

Hello

Another in the same unfortunate boat.

I had a mmc, and had an erpc on the 24th Feb. I don't know what normal is though!

This was a natural miracle, I was due to start IVF again, it took 6 years after my first mc to have my dd (15 mo) and a couple of goes of IVF. We have have 3 frozen embryos and decided to try for a sibling, when we found I had got preggers naturally, but it wasn't meant to be, and I should have been 10 weeks when I had the erpc.

So we've decided to give it a try for 6 months naturally, and have had the standard wisdom given to us to wait until after next period, however I only have a few a year- (diagnosed with Annovulation 3/4 years ago)

Not sure how long I should wait?????

Arrrrghhh!

Its not the kind of thing you compare notes with down the pub is it?

Thanks for starting this thread!

Hi Ladies! This is my first time on the site and I was hoping I could join you.
I had a MMC at Christmas, I went for my first scan and the baby had no heartbeat, I was told the foetus stopped developing around 9 weeks. I had to have an ERPC on my birthday.
This was my first pregnancy and myself and the long suffering husband had been trying for about a year and a half, I think this might be due to being on the contraceptive injection for so long previously.
It's comforting to be able to come on here and see people who have been through exactly the same thing, although I also feel sad for everyone who has had to go through this. I thought I was being histrionic as every time AF arrives I become a bit depressed and feel like I'm losing the baby all over again. And I am completely OBSESSED with TTC again. ( Any tips???) I just worry I will never be able to have a baby and as I am in my twenties the docs don't seem at all bothered.
I'm sending my thoughts and best wishes to all the ladies on here, please let me know how you all get on.

Hi Andie! sorry to hear that you're going through this as well. I also don't ovulate much (well, I didn't before my DD although I think being pregnant may have regulated things a bit) and I found that accupuncture helped with my cycle so Im not sure whether that's something you've thought about trying? After my 1st mc I wanted to wait until my 1st period before trying again but I just didn't really get one for ages so started trying anyway, however, it didn't 'work' until I'd actually had a proper period as my hormones were all over the place for ages (I have pcos which doesn't help). I eventually got pregnant with my DD 6 months after my erpc.

Not sure if any of this helps you as everyone's different and even specialist doctors can't seem to work out what the best approach is. If you get a bfn and you feel ready physically and emotionally then I don't see why you can't try again but just don't put too much pressure on yourself and try not to get your hopes up (easier said than done) as I found stressing about not getting pregnant really affected my cycle!! Good luck though - hopefully this thread will help us all x

Hi HollyBeGood. Really sorry for your loss - I know you must have been so excited to be PG after trying for that time. Never know if it's a good thing that doctors are not worried, as it means there is nothing medically to worry about, or it they're just not that bothered as it's not their baby? It's hard not to become a bit obsessed with TTC, it is a HUGE deal after all. Wishing you lots of luck.

Agree that though you wouldn't wish an mc on anyone, it is good to find other people who understand.

Hello to everyone joining and I am so sorry to hear you have all had to experience MC too. It is a sucky sucky time and I wish I could sleep for a couple of months and skip this part.

Feeling most fed up tonight. Our 12 week scan was suppose to be today and I planned to spend the evening sharing wonderful news with people. Instead my bleeding has started again - bright red - I have cramps and a zit on my chin.

Feeling ultra sorry for myself. I am having a glass of wine. Anyone else want one while I'm up?

I'd love a glass tedmundo. Sounds like you need one tonight.

I think these milestones are hard - I still feel that they should be happening to me. I was dreading yesterday as it was supposed to be my first midwife appointment. Was distracted by another visit to the epu where I always cry all over the nurses anyway. Have actually felt better today with no sobbing in a car park, though worried I'm just waiting for a fall.

I have not just one zit but a massive teenage style breakout happening. An extra helping of crap on top of everything else.

Sending big hugs to all in need xxx

hello tedmundo, so sorry you are feeling fed up tonight. So am I. It's so hard to stop thinking about the "today would have been" bit isn't it. You deserve a big big glass of wine and a very un-MN hug. I would join you in the wine but I'm just not interested in it at the moment (am sure that will change!).

One of the most rubbishest things about miscarriage is that nobody TALKS about it, which contributes to us all feeling so bloody lonely.

hello firefli
sorry you are having a crappy time too.

hi girls ive read this whole thread and i am so so so so sorry for all your losses. i had a mc last yr in january. i have pcos where my cysts ruptured on a thursday and was rushed to hospital i had an operation on thursday night. i had to sign a form saying that if i miscarried then i couldnt hold the hospital responsable and as soon as i signed that form i just knew what the bloody outcome would be. on monday night i had a few cramps and when i woke at 1 oclock in the morning (i will never forget that toilet break) to use the loo a wipe of dark red clotted blood woke me up properly in a flash.

i couldnt help but blame the hospital maybe if they had been more carful it may not of happened. or if my body was bloody normal then it wouldnt of happened. but girls there is a little bit of hope at the end of the tunnel after over a yr of ttc i finally got my bfp last monday am 6 weeks on saturday and have to say i have been absolutely pooping myself this whole way throught! please girls i know its easier said than done but please have faith and dont dont dont give up! all my thoughts are with you at this hard time.

loada and loads of big hugs for each and everyone of you! xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hello everyone! Sorry to hear that lots of us are feeling rubbish. I'm also having a glass of wine tonight- my 1st in months! Also had a bit of a wobble today as the midwife rang to see if I minded changing my 12 scan date so had to tell her I'd mc last week and hear someone else feel bad & not know what to say.

Have got OBEM on at the moment and not sure if I'm mad or torturing myself but will see how I go...think the wines made me brave!

Also had quite a bit of cramping last night which woke me up so started stressing again about infection. Bled more today so I'm hoping it's that but just want to get back to normal. Every twinge/bleed is a reminder.

Jaylee thanks for your post and masive congratulations!! Really really hope that everything works out for you. Must be a very stressful time, I totally know how you feel. I also have pcos so blame my body for quite a lot too... Xx

Oh tedmundo. I am sorry. It does suck, the milestones.

My 12 week scan was supposed to be next week. It was the first year anniversary of my dad's death and I had planned to invite my mum (who I hadn't told) and, as you say, tell everyone the good news. I am trying to think that at least I didn't find out about the loss at the scan (which would have been even worse than what happened!)

As LadyMaryCrawley says, a very un-MN hug coming your way! I will definately join you in

thank you teaandchocolate i wasnt sure whether to post my story as it maybe a little insensitive to others. but i wanted to share my positive experience that has come out of a negotive one. when you have a mc you see no light and you tend to punish yourself or blame yourself or others. i know for a fact i blamed the hospital 100% but i have learnt that they were looking out for my health. i just wanted to show everyone that at the moment it is shit (sorry for my potty mouth) but please dont give up hope. i am having a little cry writing this as i know how your all feeling and i wish i could take it away.

REALLY REALLY MASSIVE HUGS GIRLS

jaylee it is lovely to hear your news. Congratulations!

I am desperate to try again to get pregnant but also scared about the first trimester. I feel a bit sad that this MC has pretty much robbed me of ever feeling excited about a pregnancy again. I will only feel terror now until I have that 12 week scan photo in my sweaty mitt.

Anyway, I have had a lovely night with 2 mates talking about anything other than MCing. It has done me the world of good. Only had 2 glasses but after months of abstinence, I feel quite tiddly.

God bless Mr Chardonnay and his good friend Dr Shiraz.

PS I wrote that post with DH's glasses on AND DIDN'T NOTICE. Feel a right plum now.

Hi everyone, can I join you all.

I had a mmc at 13wks in december, had an erpc at what should have been 14wks.

I'm still heartbroken.

First af arrived bang on 28days after erpc, 2nd was 3 days early, next was 28days after no.2 should have arrived if that makes sense.

Every month I convince myself I'm pregnant again but now the, "first 3mnths after a mc your most fertile" have passed I feel like its never going to happen, I need to heal and being pregnant is the only way.

But then I realise I want that baby back.

So sorry you're all dealing with this to :(

Today I was due my 12 week scan have had a cry this morning as everywhere there seems to be baby's and yet again mines gone
I just want to try again but am terrified of that first 3 months but the thought of waiting is just as bad
Sorry to everyone on here though x

blondiemermaid that is exactly how I feel. I am scared to try again and scared to wait. I am just wishing this present time away. It can't go quick enough. I think I will feel better once bleeding and cramps have stopped from the ERPC. Just a miserable reminder of what is gone.

Hi Ted & Blondie. Sorry to hear you're having bad days too. I felt rubbish this morning as had loads of pain & bleeding last night & was quite concerned as with last erpc the bleeding was heavy at first then tapered off, whereas this time the bleeding was light but keeps getting heavier with bad pain. Anyone else had that?

Feel exactly the same re waiting & trying and not really wanting to do either. Just want someone to present me with a baby in 9 months... Can't bear the thought of going through all this again.

Also wanted to say hi to stateofconfusion and sorry to hear about you loss. But please don't worry too much about the 3 month window. After my 1st mc it took 6 months for me to get pregnant with my DD and that pregnancy was obviously successful. Sometimes think your body needs a break first anyway. But good luck and I totally know how you feel x

I think I should join this thread. I've had a read through and it seems like a comforting place to come to. We found out we were pregnant just over 2 weeks ago. I had been on Clomid as I have pcos and was having trouble conceiving. I started to bleed pinky reddish watery blood. We got appt at Epu on thurs. Lools like I've lost the baby :( had scan and sonographer said bluntly there's something in your womb but looks like retained products. Got blood taken to check hormone level, was told today it was very high so have to get it taken again tomorrow. Not sure what will happen then?

Hollybegood - so sorry to hear you have had a rubbish evening yesterday. I also torture myself on the conception thread sometimes. Why do we do it?? I have never retured to the Sept 2012 thread as that would be like drinking acid for me. Makes my tummy HURT.

I am sorry if I have confused you but this is my first MC. I already have 2 DC and would love another. I know I am super lucky to have the current DC but I am still reeling from this MC. It truly has felt like a bereavement. And that is what makes what your friends mum and sister wrote pretty awful actually. It is the loss of a much wanted baby and to call you pathetic is unforgivable.

Today has been slightly better. Did another pg test and while these is still a BFP it is much fainter than the bright pink one I got on Monday so clearly my hormones are now reacting to the mc. And the bleeding has gone browny red which usually means for me the end is in sight. The bleeding after the ERPC has been very very light thankfully. I will be very very glad for the bleeding to stop. I have struggled with it being a reminder all day every day.

izzybizzy - my sonographer was also very curt. You are not at Southmead are you???

If hormone levels are high that does sound positive? Good luck tomorrow hon.