Recurrent Buns Graduates - Pregnancy and Beyond

[Glitterybits]

Thought it was about time we had a new home for all those lovely ladies who used to frequent the original Recurrent Buns thread, or anyone else who has been through the hideous journey of miscarriage, recurrent miscarriage, infertility, testing etc. and now finds themselves either pregnant and in need of hand-holding (or better yet) with their long-awaited bundle(s) of joy.

I know it perhaps seems a little inappropriate to start a thread in the miscarriage topic but it still seems the most relevant spot for those of us who haven't yet completed the journey - and nowhere else really seemed right or fair to everyone.

I do hope you'll come along and say hello. I do miss you all!

Oh how long it has been. I am sooo sorry for my ridiculous absence. Besides being mad, panic busy I've been reluctant to come on here because of another user on the site. I obviously can't go into detail here and it's a pretty boring story anyway, but I didn't feel overly comfortable posting. Still not entirely sure I feel happy, but I miss you all and wanted to check in to see if everyone is okay.

justmee so, so pleased for you and I hope everything is going as well as it can. I imagine you'll be swinging between joy and anxiety in equal measure, but you're right to see this as a gift from K. No one would, for a second, think you were trying to replace him and you must never think that.

frazzled I hope you've done the opposite of what I probably would have done (unless someone dragged me kicking and screaming) and gone to the doctor. Sometimes we get through a series of hellish hurdles successfully only to slump at the other side. I hope you're feeling better. You're not alone, if it helps?

Julez It's all go for you, isn't it? Hope you're coping okay. Hope Oliver copes with dairy to make life a fraction easier for you.

Lunatic If it helps, I don't feel 'so much younger' than anyone. Thought I'd had kids relatively young considering my circle of friends and yet I'm still one of the oldest Mums at school. Not sure if that's more to do with where I live or there never being anything good on telly, but there you go!

Coconuts Frantic waves and apologies for not being here. How are your two cheeky little monkeys doing?

DS has just turned 4 and DD will be 1 very soon. Where does the time go? It seems no time at all that I was here at 22 weeks pregnant, wobbling away like a mad thing. Trying so hard not to want another one and I know I won't have one. It just feels a bit final now. I've lost 1 and a 1/2 stone since the beginning of this year and I just need to lose 7lbs more to be back to my former pre-children physique, so I'm obviously trying to tell myself it's all done with. Packed up all the baby things and shipped them out of the house to pregnant friends at the weekend to try to get my head around the fact that I'm finished, but I'd be lying if those niggly little thoughts like..."If I had a happy accident..." or "You can always go out and buy all this stuff again..." didn't creep into my head sometimes. Hormones are naughty. The more realistic side of me knows that I can't bear TTC ever again and that, even if I did, that one would still grow up far too quickly.

Waves to anyone I've missed!

hello you lovely lot! (Tis mumatron, had a name change)

Justmee. Hope things are going well for you.

Julez. I am so that you have managed to get the bottle off O. I am too tired to even consider the drama attempting that will cause.

Frazzled. Did you make it to the docs? Hopefully the manic work schedule isn't grinding you down so much.

Coconuts. How is dd's face? Poor girl. She looks thrilled with her schoo. ol uniform.

Glittery. It is insane that dd is almost one! Well done on the weight liss, any tips?

Lunatic. L is looking so grown up! Hope you are all keeping well.

We are all good. E is 18mo and keeps us all very busy! Ds has had his last day in primary school, off to secondary in Sept I feel so old :(

I must try harder to keep up with you all. If only there were more minutes in the day!

Off to try and get E to sleep.

Night all.

Hello ladies hope everyone is well. I am now able to join this thread and stop hovering too scared to post and jinx thing as finally after a 3 year slog of much disappointment i am sitting in bed with my 4 week old son laying on my chest! very very happy and thankful to everyone from the recurrent buns thread for the support and advice which helped me through :)

Hi everyone. Congratulations to all of you who've got your lovely babies, and to those of you who are on the way

Just looking for a bit of hand-holding really... I'm about 5 weeks pg after 4 mc. I'm taking 150mg aspirin and progesterone. All usual recurrent mc results were normal plus thrombophilia and thyroid antibodies normal. Have a small uterine septum (like a small bump rather than a full-on dangly thing ) which consultant says shouldn't be affecting my pregnancies.

I've done two pg tests, both positive, but I just don't feel pregnant! I keep thinking its all a big mistake and there's nothing happening in there! I've got an early scan with consultant on Monday but I know this will end in an inconclusive result as it's still early and I'll have to wait another week or longer in limbo not knowing whether this pg is viable or not. The sad thing is I just keep telling myself that at least the scan will show whether the pg is in my uterus rather than a fallopian tube so if/when? I do start bleeding at least I won't be worrying about whether its ectopic and can quietly mc at home.

Bit of a depressing ramble - apologies. It just feels a bit odd that I don't feel pg, I had symptoms quite early in my previous pgs. Anyone else symptom free? I know each woman / pg is different, its just really hard not to over analyse after mc. Please think positive baby vibes for me.....

Hallo all :) Quickie from me.

E starts school next month. I am wibbling like a jelly on a plate at the thought of September. It's looming over me like a big cloud. I should get a grip really. Sheesh. Everything is bought ready, she is ready, I am ready. But she will hate it and cry every day. Everyone tells me she'll be fine when she gets there but I know she won't.

T is one in three weeks. He's a chunky monkey as those of you on my FB will see and he is a charmer and an absolute beauty.

And we are officially done with having babies. vasectomy was three weeks ago. End of. 1% of me still wishes for that perfect pregnancy, perfect labour, perfect sleeping baby. I know it would never have happened. I needed this time to go well and it didn't, I've got my boy though and I couldn't do it again. Tried contraception this time and it killed me, my PCOS is worse than ever, I'm always so tired and emotional, can't take the pill, implant was awful; had a severe migraine every day for three months. I'm so relieved it's over now. My kids are fab and now we can enjoy DTD with no worries - well come January when he's provided his 16week sample End of a chapter for me.

lunatic Thinking of you today xxx

And justmee is doing brilliantly, very very pregnant.

Hope you all can light a candle for Kaan's 1st birthday on 14th Sept xxxx

love to all xxx

Coconuts at the vasectomy. Dp will only consider it if we have one more dc. Not going to happen. I do not have even the teeniest bit broodiness.

LF thinking of you all tonight. X

Justmee how is your pregnancy going? Well I hope.

Nothing to report from me. Apart from extreme tiredness! Am counting down the days until school goes back. Ds is starting high school still havent recovered from the price if his school uniform!

Hello! Found you all :) Tillie is 7 months old and an absolute delight :)

Hello everyone. How the time flies!

mumatron I know you've name changed, but I can't get used to you as anything else just yet! The weight loss wasn't easy. I basically cut out all the fun stuff and did a lot of running. Boring I know, but is there any other way? Can't believe E is so grown up.

Yearling Hope you're doing okay and all is well.

Lunatic I held my friend's newborn the other day and, whilst it was lovely, I found myself thinking, rather you than me. I've just had abdominal surgery to sort out the hole in my stomach muscles and, to be honest, it's quite a good enforced stopping point. The thought of needing another repair because of another massive baby bump doesn't really bear thinking about. My weight loss has now stalled as a result, but at least I lost a few lbs beforehand. I will email you when I get chance re my cryptic message. Obviously can't go into detail here. Big brother is watching and all that! So pleased your little ones are doing so well and huge apologies for not being on here at the end of August to send my best wishes.

Coconuts How did E cope at school? Better or worse than you'd hoped? I am lucky that DS loves school. I'm now back at work 2 days a week and that will probably change to 3 quite soon. Want to try and keep as much time free as possible to spend time with DD that DS got at the same age, but life is a bit chaotic to say the very least. Sorry to hear about the PCOS issues, but yey about finally making the vasectomy decision. Sometimes, nature leads the way, doesn't it? Part of me feels relief that the decision has been made for me. I will light a candle for Kaan in a couple of days. How is justmee doing now?

frazzled How are you coping? Hoping you're feeling much better now and that no news is good news.

confu3ed YEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYY! Very happy for you. xxxx

hairytale Lovely, lovely news. Very happy for you too.

Hi everyone, Thanks for bumping this on my Thread i'm on.

glittery her first afternoon is today, my stomach is churning but I hope she settles quickly, I'm sure she will. Ouchers at abdo surgery, do you have surfboard stomach now?? If so, tell me details!!

justmee is doing ok, struggling with the looming 1st birthday, then will have baby just before the anniversary of losing Kaan so it's a hard time for her at the moment but she's doing brilliantly with fundraising for the hospital.

hairy Great to see you here, and fab news Tilly is doing well :) Lovely name too xx

Hi everyone sorry i havnt been around for a while,

just an update .

It was kaans birthday on the 14th september so that knocked us very wobbly it was hard visiting the ward where he spent his life and seeing another baby in his bed with his mobile still hanging i couldnt face to go in i only saw from the door and that was enough to take my breath away,but we somehow find our feet to get through each day ,we know our lives will always be this way without him.We raised a great amount of money for the hospitals new toy room and the kids there were shocked seeing the smiles on there faces knowing kaan had done that made me smile through the tears to know hes changed the experience of children who spend alot of there lives in hospital helped us we know he would have wanted this.One thing that was lovely was that everyone remembered kaan and all the parents where told about kaan and us and why we were doing this, we just hope he was looking down proud the days leeding and after have been awful i have been down but i have to try to pull myself up for the sake of a little life inside me who reminds me with little kicks here and there that there wiill be a bit of sunshine back in our lives not forever but to help a gift from kaan his baby brother.

Pregnancy-
29 weeks and so far everything seems ok i dont know if any of your know but i was on bedrest for almost 3 months as i had a very large hematoma which gave me a 50% chance of loosing our rainbow but at 22 weeks the doctor was suprised when the hematoma had totally cleared and i could come off bedrest i think kaan was looking down on him :,) ,care has been great the doctor was seeing me every 2 weeks for scans then went down to 3 weeks now we are at 4 weeks 2 big scans that were formed by cardiology on his heart showed that he doesnt have the same defect kaan had and that he cannot see any problems he said your baby is healthy then it was down to pediactric ward for them to check the organs and there they saw rainbows food tube (as many of you know kaans wasnt formed probly) so they could also tell us there was no problems there so we left with the all clear its all so bittersweet a time where were supose to be happy yet theres a tug at our heart our little boys not here to see im being booked for my scan in around 9 weeks so im just wishing the time away.

thankyou lovelybunch for updating everyone hun ..

and lots of love to all you ladies hope you and your little ones are all doing well xxxxxxxxx

Ah, most of you have gone AWOL! Hoping no news is good news?

Coconuts Was school as bad as you'd feared, or is DD settling in nicely? Ha, at the surfboard stomach analogy! For the first few days post op it felt as though I'd done about a million stomach crunches (and even looked a bit better) but a few weeks down the line of very sedentary behaviour (doctor's orders) and I've got my post preggy pouch again. Sigh! Hoping to get back to exercising again properly this weekend. The biggest problem with an abdominal hernia is that you're not allowed to lift anything for ages, so it's been interesting trying to cope with a baby who refuses to walk!

justmee You are a truly amazing woman and thank you for updating us on your pregnancy. It certainly does sound as though Kaan is looking out for his little brother and, though it must be very hard to deal with happiness in the face of what you've been through, you are so deserving of this little rainbow. Can't believe you endured bedrest for 3 months after everything else. Massive hugs and much love to you for the rest of your pregnancy. Keep the faith. You should be so proud for all that you have achieved in the face of such tragedy. You are a huge inspiration. xxxxx

Monday was the 2nd anniversary of my miscarriage. Hard to believe it was 2 years ago now. The fact that my baby is 14 months old makes it seem less horrible in hindsight, but hindsight makes everything seem easier than it was IYKWIM. I spent much of that day and yesterday in a tearful state hugging my babies. Isn't it funny how it still gets you, often when you least expect it? Planning to light a candle on 15th for the Wave of Light.

I meant 3rd anniversary. Dear me! Brain turned to mush!

Hi all, I need to come back here more often!

School is brilliant, E loves it, settled in really well, reading excellently already. Can't quite believe it :)

T is no longer a baby. Walking, babbling, generally being a PITA into everything!

LF my baby stuff went a long time ago! We are so done. Aw at talking (can't wait for that stage)

glittery Can't believe it's been three years. Do you sometimes just sit back and look at the kids and wonder how the hell everything has even happened?!

mumatron Vasectmy isn't all it's cracked up to be. Running out of comdoms is no longer a viable excuse to avoid sex

Those of you on FB your kids are beauts (particularly LAF's chubbster - he has the best hair ever )

Love to all xxx

Just realised how long it's been since I said hello. My bad! I hope you are all doing really really well. I haven't forgotten you. Life is just bonkers, as ever! However, it's a lot happier than it was 3 and a bit years ago. Much love to you all. xxx

Fabulous to hear. Can scarcely believe my youngest bean is nearly 2. I'm still ever so slightly amazed that she's actually here!