I kind of feel like I'm dead

[MentholLoad]

I really really hope you can tell me that this passes

I have no energy, everything hurts yadda yadda. but I don't enjoy ANYTHING. I don't want to do anything at all. I don't want to work, I don't want to clean the house. I don't even want to spend time with friends. I don't feel like I have anything to say about anything. I just want it to be quiet. I long for retirement but I don't know what I want to do. I don't know if I want to move house or if I am happy were I am. I have no interest in travelling or going on holidays or anything. I think I could become reclusive. but it frightens me

Sorry that was for writingonthewall

@Naturerhymes I do find having dogs helpful for my mood.

I have no energy, everything hurts yadda yadda. but I don't enjoy ANYTHING. I don't want to do anything at all. I don't want to work, I don't want to clean the house. I don't even want to spend time with friends. I don't feel like I have anything to say about anything. I just want it to be quiet

OP I could have written your post especially the bit about just wanting it to be quiet - I was actually thinking this morning that I would love to go away for a week where nobody would be able to speak to me! Can’t work out if it’s a low level depression (I’m already on HRT & not sure if it’s helping any more) or if this is just normal (I’m 51) doesn’t help that DC have been off school since end of June (I’m in N.I) and the weather can only be described as ‘warm cloudy greyness’ since then!
Hugs to all fellow travellers - menopause (or whatever the hell this is) is shit
Wish I could just shake off this funk

Yes to the warm cloudy greyness. It really affects my mood.

Even tgough I'm taking HRT I've ongoing thoughts regarding existentialism and it's overwhelming at times. I feel very introspective and philosophical about life. My anxiety is less so, however I worry the hrt stops working, I don't want to revert to the dark place.

I'm lucky I live on the coast and I swim in the sea every day. I honestly don't know how I'd cope.

It's the menopause "meh". As PPs have says HRT sorted it very quickly.

I have the same problem. I can’t be bothered with anything and as as a result I hardly get any exercise. I sometimes feel debilitatingly tired. Occasionally I say a different word than I intended to say. Everything hurts. I keep telling the doctor I must have bone cancer or some awful disease because this isn’t normal. She insists I’m fine, I just need some vitamins and maybe HRT in a few years. I don’t know what the solution is.

I’m already on HRT and it did help at the start but I’m not sure it’s as effective 4 years on

@gabbyaggy I grew up on the coast and do think it would help me now. Agree with PP about the warm cloudy greyness, it's also felt airless this summer and I'm craving some fresh costal air.

I’m 50 and I’m the depths of shitty peri. I am sitting here reading your words and nodding yes to everything you have written.

Whilst do this, my dh (who is on AL) is cleaning cleaning our kitchen and the windows and I sat here at the kitchen table doing sod all. I feel like such a lazy bitch but I honestly can’t help it.

I am sat here with zero motivation (as always these days) and feeling a complete failure. I too, no longer have it in me to converse, to want to do anything and long to live in the middle of the country side away from noise and people or anything which requires me to think or do. I simple have no desire to do anything anymore.

I feel like a dry sponge and all the ‘moistness’ of life has been squeezed out of me lol!

The day I started HRT I felt the rage and depression melt away . Recently, symptoms have returned to a lesser degree, I've upped my oesteogel so here's hoping.

Any lakes nearby? Don't know much regarding still water, gives me the creeps.

Yes that’s the way I felt @gabbyaggy symptoms have definitely started to return in the last 6 months or so even with the HRT

Have you increased your HRT or tweaked your meds?

Yesterday I was consumed by brain fog and exhaustion perhaps it was just a bad day.

My hormones are out of sync. Was taking gel and GP did a blood test and found my estrogen was on the low side of normal so she has switched me to a patch Estriadot (as I didn't get on with the larger patch) Just started using it this week. In the interim, I foolishly gave up taking the gel - went on holiday and it was a faff. Feeling anxious and have prickly skin. Tearful and generally in a tired, can't be arsed state. Over the past week or so I have just been eating loads of chocolate in a bid for energy and comfort. I started vacuming up this morning but didn't get very far. I can see all the jobs that need doing and just want to run away. Going for a short walk this afternoon but my knees are bloody aching too just to add injury to insult. Very fed up. Hoping against hope this patch helps produce some comfort. Would love to be watching the sea right now, it carries on regardless whilst I cannot.

@gabbyaggy I’ve thought about it but the faff of trying to get through to a GP means I keep putting it off!

I felt like you op and went to the GP asking for HRT. My bloods showed low B12 and Vitamin D. Not saying that's your issue, but it's worth looking into. B12 serum tests are pretty inaccurate, so you may come back 'normal' but still be deficient. I'm self-injecting B12 now, and feel so, so much better. Have a look at the Vitamin B12 wake up fb group, or the Pernicious Anaemia Society.

@MentholLoad within a year, and I didn't use HRT.

Can I ask did you struggle constantly with the nasty low mood, or was it very up and down like mine? And was it just for the one year?

Wish I knew where to start with all this.
Cant be normal to feel like this for years on end

A lot of antidepressants make you worse, fact. If you read all possible side effects that is evident.

HRT can also cause depression and migraine. I was on it for a while in my perimenopausal phase, mainly because of flushes and I had quite a demanding job. When I stopped taking it the flushes came back but I realised I had panicked, they weren't too bad and wished I'd never taken the HRT in the first place.

All passed in time and I've been fine. I make sure I eat healthily, drink plenty of water and take some vitamin and mineral supplements (have taken Osteocare Original since before having any perimenopausal symptoms, as a precaution).

These things pass. I remember my mother being perimenopausal and regularly going red in the face but she was OK after a while, in fact she said she was better than ever.

Good luck.

Yes it does.

This could describe me too. But I have the added complication of having ME/CFS and Fibro. Everywhere I read (including in these replies - no shade, obviously it works for most people), is to exercise. What I wouldn’t give to be able to.

My ME/CFS symptoms overlap with peri ones but lately it’s like they’re all ganging up on me and I can barely function. Sometimes I haven’t got the energy to talk to people. My anxiety is through roof, despite being on the highest dose of citalopram and I dread doing everything because I feel like shit all the time. Even going for a meal overwhelms me. My son gets married in October and as much as I am obviously excited for the wedding itself, I cannot get excited overall because it will be such a long day. I’m sick of feeling like this all the time.

Sorry, that turned into a bit of a ramble.

yes, I also have CFSME and a painful disability. Maintaining exercise is HARD isn't it. what I would LOVE to do is retire, so that the little energy I have, I can spend on exercise instead of work. can't afford to do that though

Oh GOD I would love to stop working. I actually hate it. I have so little energy and working takes up so much of it. I am exhausted.