I kind of feel like I'm dead

[MentholLoad]

I really really hope you can tell me that this passes

I have no energy, everything hurts yadda yadda. but I don't enjoy ANYTHING. I don't want to do anything at all. I don't want to work, I don't want to clean the house. I don't even want to spend time with friends. I don't feel like I have anything to say about anything. I just want it to be quiet. I long for retirement but I don't know what I want to do. I don't know if I want to move house or if I am happy were I am. I have no interest in travelling or going on holidays or anything. I think I could become reclusive. but it frightens me

Another day, another day wide awake at 6.30am. This fluctuation is the pits. I felt awful yesterday morning, slightly better in the afternoon, OK in the evening. and repeat.

@EstrogenPatches I'm the same.
Mornings are the worst and by evening feel quite okay. I'm
post menopausal so god alone knows why this is happening.

Back to work tomorrow after the summer break and I'm dreading it.

That will be cortisol levels rising in the morning. If you've got too high levels generally then you get anxiety rather than the get up and go boost in the morning. I've had it recently and went for CBT and lifestyle changes before the option of HRT.

Oh God this in spades.

Naturerhymes report in the spotting especially if you are post menopausal. GP may want to check it.

I don't mind being invisible tbh at this point, if I was ALLOWED. if I could just st retire and grump around doing what I want. but the frigging government are forcing me to be a functional member of society until I'm what, 67??! I'm pretty sure I will end it before then.

@MentholLoad yep I'm with you there.

67?? Functional member of society I don't think so!

52 and flagging big time right now!

And bloody social media is really bloody annoying me ( I've removed myself from it!)

All these people taking photos of their lunch/ tea/ dessert/ coffee

or "I am at at Gloucester services "

Grrhhh

At least the sun is shining and I can immerse myself in nature, before the shit of the day kicks in. 🌹

I am at Gloucester services

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

😂😂 They must be worth checking out!!

Michaelwood Services.....a surprising amount of my mis spent youth was there

I seem to have a lot of women who have somehow blossomed during middle age on my social media, having adventures and living life. makes me feel so inadequate

@MentholLoad yes me too. I'm living half a life right now, thanks to hormones, bleeding, a fibroid and god knows what else.

Avoiding SM for the foreseeable, it just makes me feel worse.

feel worse than ever today. have managed to get out of bed and have a shower, hoping it would make me feel human. but I'm just sat on the sofa watching TV. everyday, just dreading everything and anything, just waiting to go back to bed

I'm being investigated for pituitary problems (early menopause, weird thyroid issues), which can also cause growth hormone deficiency.

When reading around about it, I was surprised that on almost all the different symptoms lists for growth hormone deficiency it list "social isolation". Every time I see it I think, well that's weirdly specific, but it definitely seems to described the withdrawal from life and society caused by some hormone imbalance in a more accurate way than simply anxiety and depression or reduced mental well-being or lack of motivation etc, and it's good that it is recognised as a specific symptom separate to anxiety and depression rather than assuming it is because of them.

Sounds like a bad day @MentholLoad could you even get out into the air for a bit? It’s a beautiful day here in N.I today & even sitting outside reading my book for half an hour has made me feel better

I can't bear the noise good weather creates. Bloody barking dogs, kids screeching, people having loud bellowing conversations in the street, lawnmowers, strimmers, car stereos as people wash cars....AGGGHH. What is wrong with us?

That's fascinating about social isolation. My son has puberty delay and hormonal abnormalities atm, and he has become very withdrawn over the last year. 'Sex' hormones are so central to mood, I find increasingly.

@MentholLoad sorry you are feeling crappy. If it's any consolation, I've dragged myself through the day with no sleep last night. Tossing and turning, hot etc etc.

Life feels tough right now 😢

what @Stormydayagain wrote, IS fascinating isn't it @AInightingale . social isolation is spot on. @AchillesHeel23 I have been into the garden but I was so sweaty and irritated. that makes me so sad, because I used to LOVE summer/the heat/sunshine. I've dragged myself to the gym. just sat in the carpark trying to find the enthusiasm to go in. watch this space

@MentholLoad do it! Guarantee you will feel better when you come out than you did when you went in

Basically your hormones are your mood. In clinical trials doctors have been able to cause depression in men & women just by lowering their estrogen and testosterone.

The withdrawl/social isolation aspects really resonates with me. I can't seem to dig myself out of my own hole. I have other issues going on (diagnosed) which then further aggrevates this. I hate the cycle I'm in and then berate myself for not making the necessary changes I think I ought to make to try and improve my state of mind.

I've been swopped from oestrogel to estradot as it was found that in spite of using maximum dosage my blood results showed low estrogen. I've only been using the patches a couple of weeks but so far, I don't think they've been effective enough. And, even if they were/are, there is a real shortage (I was lucky last time) and it is a scramble to keep up the medication.

had to come back and say that my daughter and her friend stopped at Gloucester services this week (it's not the ones I was thinking of) and they came back raving about them. they are 18 so not easily impressed by motorway service stations!!now need to go and check them out 🤣

What I have found since menopause is that I crave peace and quiet. Crowds, noise, tv programmes that are too stimulating for want of a better word. Everything in life now seems designed to over stimulate. Gentle, quiet activities are just not the norm. My adult kids are constantly needing entertainment and stimulation. It’s exhausting. I’ve just come back from a week in the Lake District in a house with no close neighbours. Total silence. Wildlife, the sound of running water and no internet or phone signal. I arrived frazzled and stressed and feeling very depressed. I left feeling like a different person. The sheer amount of background noise these days is just overwhelming. My whole nervous system settled.

@Writingonthewalls totally agree with you on this.

I work with mainly 30/ early 40 somethings and they seem to thrive on noise, stimulation, activity and general loudness. My 52 year old nervous system is a total wreck by the end of the working day! Hence why I am seeking a different job!

Very interesting, the fact that you feel your nervous system is more regulated in a natural environment. I feel this way too but then my nervous system was disregulated in the first place so now it is amplified. I am very much drawn to water, wildlife. I am suddenly more interested in swimming. I can sit and stare at the sea (sadly don't live close to the coast).

I get the sense that everything is over-stimulating and moves too fast. I often feel that it is me that is out of step with everyone else so it is reassuring to hear others feel this way too.