where have all the fit,interesting and available men gone PT19

[aseriouslyblondemoment]

blimey do we really talk that much?!
pc

Ninah - . Thai Farmer? Missed that.

Juice - back to it.

SM01 - v v knackered indeed.

Hi everyone else.

Ok monty, recap
friend has a friend, whom she bigs up something enormous. You know, very Nice, Own Property, No children etc
he does have a little penchant for Thai ladies but perhaps in a small village one can overlook etc
ok well the Thai thing was a total upchuck for me until one day I figured I had to do something to chase off nm/ex - and on with the new etc
so i texted dear old TF for a date y'see
he replied v keenly and asked where
and it went back and forth
and then suddenly silent
until now
well I know country folk are slow ...
whaddya think I said back then?

Ninah - do tell.

Ffs exh has just arrived to discuss ds' shenanigans. and he has just got back from a week in Spain. I'm going to do the sums one of these days on how much maintenance he owes me his two dcs. Must be 30k. .

Laters.

good luck monty x

morning all

is it only me who cant wake up today?

the only news with me is that the bf got promoted yesterday, which is very good , as he was on the verge of quitting

going to be starting work at 6 am tho

rather him than me

Hi all. Ninah - sounds intriguing - can't hurt to meet Thai man - that is if you still want to!

Lou and SingleMum yes it is very hard to get up at the moment. Permanent state of knackeredness all around. I think it's something to do with the lost hour because so many people at work are just lolling around looking awful! That's good news Lou about mechanic's job.

Bit of advice needed. Fireman, as I suspected, disappeared but that's fine. Got chatting couple of nights ago to another bloke on POF who seems lovely. He actually rang me for 10 minutes last night but now I have a dilemma. He was incredibly honest and said that as he is going to meet me on Friday, he is not going on POF until he sees how it goes with me. Also had his daughters there and was speaking openly on the phone which feels like a good honest thing. However, then he dropped the potential bombshell that his marriage ended because he had an affair. Now my shoulders drooped and I thought, crap, seems so honest and upfront but if he can have an affair he could do it again. It's not that I'm looking ahead but is there any point in even starting with a man who has had an affair. I'm a bit sensitive on this one as I have never had an affair but have been on the receiving end several times.

what do you think? Would be grateful for some objective comments.

Hope everyone has had a good day today.

oh blimey i dont know about that one

on the one hand he has been honest enough to admit it, but on the other hand, knowing he has had an affair before , could you trust him 100%?

how long ago was it etc?

Thanks Lou. I am meeting him on Friday so will grill him about it then!

He was talking about making it up to his daughters and he is staying at his exs house for a month until he moves into his house. His ex is getting married again and it is all very amicable.

Will know more on Friday I guess but I hear warning bells!

i think you need to find out more of the finer details before you make your mind up

i think it is beer o'clock

it's school holidays

cake - agree with lou on this one. it's a bit of a double edged sword . your call at end of day.

supposed to be studying.

but after spending a day in serious chats with forces things aren't looking good.

says he's coming up from his brother on sat to discuss it. whether or not that will happen we will see.

i've activated my profile back on pof.

doesn't look good ladies.

how do you feel about that juice?

(i havent been able to keep up with everyone fully whilst i had no internet, so dont know anything but you went to see him)

Oh Juice I'm sorry - what happened and how do you feel about it all? Has there been a specific incident or just general?

lou - a bit about it. but i knew from beginning he had commitment issues in past. having never got past the 3 month mark previously.

there was some confusion over whether he would be in edi for most of his leave. but he has ended up at his brothers for alot longer than i expected. my fault because i kinda presumed. his fault becuase he refused to say outright he might be there as long as 1 week. so we've been locking horns a couple of times this week.

cake, it really is worrying to say the least. We are all on the lookout for positive signs, and green flags. Permission to bother, go ahead with these dates, (from ourselves), to put energy into things, to take risks.

It is positive that he told you. Perhaps it was not altogether a good time in his life, the fact that he had an affair, and we/you don't know why, when or how? Is it something he regrets cos he was found out, or it ruined everything?

Lots to find out, but a bit heavy for the first date, but maybe you need to know asap!

Juice, I don't know much about forces.but it seems you have that gut feeling? I think you will have to wait and see. Why has he never got past 3 months? Sorry i can't be of any more help.

I am ok, still a bit rocked, a bit hurt, a bit angry. I emailed him yesterday, just to get that last bit off my chest. it was a subtle note, to him, to be very aware of being an arse to nice people. He won't thak me for it, he won't care, but I really couldn't give a fuck. he needed to be told, by me!!

Thanks Pirate - you're right - I will see on Friday and make a decision then, or maybe not because he won't be interested in me anyway!!

Haven't admitted this on here but I sent a similar text to Roofer asking him to seriously think about how he might be hurting women by his dishonesty! So I understand why you wanted to do it. That was cathartic for me and I will not go near him in any way again. Hopefully, this will be the last time you contact him so try to put it to bed and carry one. Have you got chatting to anyone else properly yet?

Juice - I hope you get the result you want - sounds a bit like crossed wires with neither of you saying what your expectations were.

he says its down to his work. and also his lack of not finding anyone who he'd want to maintain the effort of long distance involved. he's not overly fussed about relationship. quite likes his own company. but says he's coming to a point where he realises he's getting older and he actually wants a relationship. its weird though. all the good bits of relationships we take for granted he has nevr experienced. staying in watching dvd's. cooking dinner, everytime we do something like that its a new experience to him. but he's felt the backlash of the bad sides of relationship in his short ones he's had. he's had the nagging /jealousy, etc.... but never the good stuff that goes with it to see its worth while.

oh it's deffo the last thing i will say to the man/boy.

I had no intention of getting in touch with him since sat when i text him. That he wasn't woth the bother all that, yet yesterday i thought, nope you know what i need to get this out of my system.

Try to hold that bit of you back on friday (i am learning!!), and see how it goes.

I have been looking ont he date sites, but tbh, need a breather for now, not someone to fill the gap he's left.

juice, it must be strange to hear someone say they have never had that sort of relationship.

How's this all making you feel?

pc - i knew from start. and so far it had never posed a problem. but. we'll see what happens on sat. if he does come up.

Evening all - I'm still knackered! Roll on tomorrow evening when work/school finished!

Ninah - Thai Farmer! What?? Is he Thai or are you Thai? Or is no-one Thai?? I'm confused!

Lou - great news about the bf promotion.

Juice - sorry to hear about the forces bloke, maybe something can be sorted if he comes over Sat though

PC - how are you doing?

Cake - affair

Older blokes been texting me more than normal the last week, now puts 3 x at the end of a message too! Still wary and holding back, although he does seem genuine, seeing him on Sat eve. Still early days, but its good early days at the moment, so I'm just enjoying it for what it is.

i beleive the thai farmer had a thing about thai women?

lou, to answer a question put by you last wed, i live in Devon!!!!

Juice . See what happens when/if you see him at the weekend. As it's long distance and he's already creating problems then perhaps not worth it for you.

Cake, seems strange he told you all this before meeting, he has warned you in advance as maybe he might have had women put off once they find out somewhere down the line, understandably. Worth finding out a little more, like how come he has ended up alone and his ex get's committment.

Enjoy your dates, everyone who has one. Nothing planned for this weekend except, chocolate, hotcross buns, roast and lashings of wine. Roll on Friday.

Waves to Lou, have a great Easter.

Wow Pirate - I live in Devon too!!

thanks everyone.

will just have to see what happens sat. in meantime i'm back to studying. and possible hiding my pof profile again as already driving me bananas. i swear girlies... you need to come up to scotland to try out scottish pof experience. it's maniac.

cake where abouts? ( wonders how cryptic we can do this!)