where have all the fit and interesting men gone part.....9? isit 9?

[ridingjoker]

ooooh i get to start the thread.
unless i'm being thick and cant find it.

lou - go on send me a pic of dark horse i'm so nosey.

ninah - i think thats really rude of your friend. if she didn't have anything nice to say she shouldn't have said anything at all.

lost - do you mean sailing of TOGETHER scares you? or him sailing off alone scares you?

what exactly do you think he wants?

hope you all had good days in the sun

lost - what is it you think he wants? and more importantly, what do YOU want?

hmm it is very hard when you are usd to being on your own, suddenly having someone in your life. I am not at that stage yet, but can't imagine allowing anyone in iyswim. It is hard, for me anyway, to weigh up the risk of being hurt or rejected or it all going horribly wrong with actually taking that chance in the first place. or, I just spend waaaaaay too much time thinking!

asbm - I just emailed him asking him out for a drink again and he jumped at the chance. bless him. I got myself all confused about whether or not I was ready for dating, when actually I just didnt have a fecking clue how on earth this whole dating lark works. so I stopped getting scared and leapt in, and I still dont have a clue, but I AM having fun

I am pished but can still touch type!!

I think he really wants a serious rship. And for all sorts of reasons I don;t think I can offer it.

mainly cos of experience with exh - I was with him for 15 years and after abt 3 (after ds1 was born) I sort of wanted out but bcos we were married and I thought that I should stick at it I did. Even though it was hell.

So the thought of that repeating itself is one of the main reasons. And couldn't do that to dcs again.

scl do you want the freedom to see other men here
or is it that you don't want a serious relationship with samename?

lost - snap! but without the ds so early on. the thought of it all repeating IS awful, but I do think now you are more aware of what you will or will not accept in a relationship

I am having counselling still, and my counsellor suggested I stop trying to predict the future, but to be aware. It is kind of helping, and stopping the random freak outs that were happening...

no it isn' that - I don't want to date several men at once - its that I am scared of having a serious relationship with someone again. Cos it might all go very badly wrong.

yes I am also having counselling. But we havent really got to the crux point yet. i am very scattergun when I go to see her (and she yawns alot ).

well we've all been there haven't we as we're all lps now
if i'm truthful i do find the prospect of being hemmed in again truly terrifying

you wont know unless you try ladies !!! jump in both feet. get absolutely soaked. the waters lovely.

i might go tits up. but are the good bits of relationship not worth the chance?

I just wonder whether it might be easier to leave anything really serious until dcs are older.

If they were really young then don't think I would be thinking that way but my dcs are nearly 13 and nearly 8 which I think is difficult age.

rj - totally agree. and if it starts going tits up, you can always bail out. took me ages to come to that conclusion though, with a lot of confusion along the way.

lost - i suppose. specially when you have very little free time.

my dc are very very young. so i suppose its definately easier for me as they are non the wiser if i organise meeting/dates well.

yes i think it really only gets difficult once the dc start to become attached
but if i'm honest i'm now alot more aware of hurting other people
i'm not too sure if this is an age thing or a post divorce thing

Ya Cant have mine.... lol

sunshine we wouldn't want to
we only look at the available ones

morning all!
hope everyone has had a good weekend and enjoys today
scl hope date goes off ok
lou
nothing much happening here with me,but my inbox seems to be getting busy again

Can I come and join in please

I've finally decided I really need to start looking around, joined midsummers eve (but seem to attract v. weird sorts!!!!!!!) and have just joined datingdirect after a girl at work said she thought thats where some nice men are! lol.

Is that true? also what's with the dating direct affinity thing??

i ended up driving to reading yesterday evening to get darkhorse as the train turned out to be a bus service and wouldve taken ages

so picked him up and got a take away on the way back for all of us with some wine, and watched a flim with the kids before bed

we are just off fro a picnic by the river with 3 of my brood, the oldest is out with friends

he will stay again tonight and go home tomorrow then i will see him again on friday when he is taking me away overnight

then tomrrow night i am meant oto be going for dinner with a friend (and i mean purely a friend lol), which will be really nice , as i havent seen him for ages

hi luna - any success of possibilities from your sites. where abouts are you. ? different areas have better selection on different sites.

lou - picnic sounds nice

scl - hope date and the chat goes as you want

hi luna!
midsummers eve?what's that like?
and weirdos?
did you meet any of them?
or is this just weirdy texting/mailing etc
all quiet still with me,exh has messed up my day as is now bringing the dc back 6hrs late!
and to think i could have been out for a drink this lunchtime with the latest cyberman off frd!
yes,talk about quick off the mark this one he obv.doesn't want a penpal!

Hi everyone,

Hope you have all been enjoying the marvellous sunshine. I looked like a lobster last night, but hey it will turn brown. Went to a 21st, had DD with me, so got home at 11.30. The adults wanted to go partying around town. They were up till 4 so I'm glad I went home. Getting a bit fed up of boozy nights anyway. Also many lined up with the wedding and family celebrations.

Sound like a few of us are having some luck and fun. ASBM re-arrange that date pronto. Lou it all sounds great. Nothing like the hot weather to make me wish I could get all romantic with someone nice.

Went for a drive and an ice cream earlier. Bit of all the couples enjoying the views and looking all gooey eyed over their 99's.

Hi everyone,

Hope you have all been enjoying the marvellous sunshine. I looked like a lobster last night, but hey it will turn brown. Went to a 21st, had DD with me, so got home at 11.30. The adults wanted to go partying around town. They were up till 4 so I'm glad I went home. Getting a bit fed up of boozy nights anyway. Also many lined up with the wedding and family celebrations.

Sound like a few of us are having some luck and fun. ASBM re-arrange that date pronto. Lou it all sounds great. Nothing like the hot weather to make me wish I could get all romantic with someone nice.

Went for a drive and an ice cream earlier. Bit of all the couples enjoying the views and looking all gooey eyed over their 99's.

Hey up everyone, what a busy weekend it's been!

I've had a lovely but incredibly busy time having rushed down to Newcastle this w/e and come back up with my sis.

1st handover since residence order ok, but experience tells me XP will be plotting something. Ho hum.

What's going on date wise, man wise, everything wise etc?

I've had a crackpotty email from exbf. Don't know if anyone remembers my post from last week with the delightful racist comments he made? Anyway, I got a big long email full of links/stats to prove that he is right to be chippy, miserable, self-pitying and bitter and telling me I had my head in the sand, so obviously he has been brooding over this in typical self-obsessed fashion.

My initial reaction was supreme irritation and I was all ready to dash off a scathing reply. But on reflection I just thought, how sad - he could have done something USEFUL or ENJOYABLE instead of wasting the considerable time and and effort he put into that email. Just hope he leaves it there.