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Original poster

Think I may have put him off by making it sound like hard work

157 replies

wintercitylover · 15/01/2009 12:39

Very basic internet dating issue.

Been chatting to guy online (he is single but 40ish) he asked to meet so fine I said ok when and where? He came back with a day.

I realise (due to my limited availability) that I prob should have suggested a day and time etc

Cos I then replied backsaying not easy to meet in the weekday evenings because would have to get babysitter, could do lunchtimes in the week, or every other sat. Blah Blah Bit like in those 80s films when people said I will find you a window!!

Finishing up with a jokey bit about well if that hasn't put you off

Thing is it prob has hasn't it? he's read the mail thought omg how complicated and run for the hills (as we on mumsnet like to say).

Shame cos it was instant attraction on my part. Suppose if he is really interested it wouldn't put him off.

Anyway he's not he only iron I have in the fire (lol) and I have similar probs with the other trying to meet up. It's not that easy.

OP posts:
lou33 · 22/01/2009 23:43

if it bothers you then later him, dont feel bad about it, too much too soon is not good

Original poster
wintercitylover · 22/01/2009 23:46

well i will meet him but he seems to be acting like a couple already - eek I am not ready for that. haven't even met him or talked to him on the phone fgs

OP posts:
Original poster
wintercitylover · 22/01/2009 23:49

also dont think its particularly personal prob any reasonable woman might fit the bill.

I know I am easy to talk to etc and look ok but that doesn't mean anything much. It's just base level.

For me there would have to be a whole lot more.

OP posts:
aseriouslyblondemoment · 22/01/2009 23:53

blimey talk about options lol!
i would be open minded tbh
don't dismiss him it could be him
i missed out on a man like that
don't want you to do the same thing
have you looked at Bobdowne's thread
we have been discussing this very thing

lou33 · 23/01/2009 00:11

i had man talking to me like that once, when he sent me over 200 texts one weekend talking of moving closer to me, marrying me and us all emigrating , when i hadnt even met him, i told him to back off

aseriouslyblondemoment · 23/01/2009 10:35

lol @ Lou
yes i would also find that a bit freaky from a man i hadn't even met
but in my case i had

Original poster
wintercitylover · 23/01/2009 12:11

haven't read the other thread yet will do. He was saying things like we were two peas in a pod (yuk) and when I joked with him abot having a woman in every town - he said no way but have one in (where I live). it could be his soh but it has made me feel a bit uncomfortable.

Think I will stay off MSN for a couple of nights.

OP posts:
aseriouslyblondemoment · 23/01/2009 12:18

LOL!
yes all too cheesy for my liking
any def times established yet?

Original poster
wintercitylover · 23/01/2009 12:50

yes I have def date to meet him next week plus the second guy of same name to first guy.

First guy of same name has gone cool. Prob still looking at his diary or checking out his fb harem.

I have taken today off as holiday - after working late last night, getting so much shit from exH last night and all this plus house is a tip, I am in danger of getting overloaded.

OP posts:
Original poster
wintercitylover · 23/01/2009 12:50

confused - you will be.

OP posts:
aseriouslyblondemoment · 23/01/2009 14:45

no i'm still keeping up lol!
i did look at your other thread WCL
and did mean to post
but it all read as so depressingly familiar and i'm sooo sick of wasting my mental energy on my exh
but needless to say am right behind you

Original poster
wintercitylover · 23/01/2009 17:25

samename2 has now tried to change arrangements to meet in his local area which I can't really do - for first meet I want to be on my patch and also it will take ages for me to get there.

If we met again I happy to go to his neck of the woods. Think that's fair enough.

They're weeding themselves out LOL

OP posts:
aseriouslyblondemoment · 23/01/2009 17:43

is that making things easier or not then
the natural selection process?
am actually toying here at having another shot at online dating
but really don't know if i need the hassle tbh

Original poster
wintercitylover · 23/01/2009 18:34

not really because I really did want to see samename2 - we have been in touch for a long time and there seeems to be a mutual attraction there. He has gone away for the weekend so may hear from him - I suggested an earlier time.

So as it stands it's Mr ABitKeen, I will have to put him straight if he continues to be so.

I think for me initially didn't like online dating, then got quite keen on it but now am not sure again.

Do you think you will go back on?

OP posts:
aseriouslyblondemoment · 23/01/2009 18:50

oh no!
this is exactly what i mean by saying im not too sure if i should or not.
it just seems such a hassle,thou admittedly in the nicest possible way mostly
we'll see
who knows after i've knocked back a few glasses of vino later

aseriouslyblondemoment · 24/01/2009 13:36

well a quick update i did it!
and yes wasn't surprised to see that my exb appears to be on there too!
looks like we've both moved on

sincitylover · 24/01/2009 20:43

oh how did that feel? I think I would be gutted.

Samename2 was in touch today and we are meeting this week.

have had a brilliant day with boys, we went football went to Stamford Bridge. Apart from journey there and back it was brill. Exbf supports chelsea so a bit that couldn't share it with him but it was fantastic either way.

Had a phone 'reading' yesterday too which was very positive.

aseriouslyblondemoment · 24/01/2009 21:10

what the LDR one?
i just pmsl tbh!!
just hope he doesn't message me thou
what has made me sad is that the man who i really like and messed about is back on there too
so i don't know what to do
bet you're excited about samename2
way hey lol!

aseriouslyblondemoment · 24/01/2009 21:11

ps love the new name!

sincitylover · 24/01/2009 21:38

yes thought it might be appropriate in the circs!!! (hopeful emoction (sp))

What happened with the guy you liked online who messed you around. Did you go out with him?

I was also chatted to by a rather nice young German guy today who gave me some snuff of all things- well I hope it was that anyway. I did gingerly snort it!!!

DS1 said to me after was he trying to chat you up LOL

aseriouslyblondemoment · 24/01/2009 21:47

the one who messed me about was the LDR and i'm well rid
the man i went out with and really like is still on site but i doubt he'll take me seriously now{kicking myself emoticon}
hmm a young German who offered you snuff?
i bet your dss were well amused!

aseriouslyblondemoment · 25/01/2009 17:06

well an update!
my biggest fears confirmed!
logged on exbf had viewed me and i had only been on there one night!
i had name changed too
dont know whether he was specifically looking out for me and was going by towns or had set his search by type ie blondes
i imagine the latter as hes out for next booty call no doubt
it was a mixture of shock/anger and amusement
he hadnt even tried to hide his identity lol!
so i sent him a message..
am so proud of myself for doing so as i can now draw a line under it and properly move on
ah closure lol!

sincitylover · 26/01/2009 23:47

an update from me

Mr Keen well we spoke on phone and meeting one night this week. Spooked me on the phone as sounds exactly like exbf (spookily they were brought up within a stone's throw from one another but of course I haven't told him that) but even so unnerved me somewhat. Physically very different though.

samename2 has stalled as he is staying over on his weekend away one more night and wants me to go over to his area - which for various reasons is a no no for me (em too far and too far out of my comfort zone). So looks like we are back to the drawing board.

samename1 is a lost cause I think he is online all the time (or when I am on and off it hes always there) and did not come back to me. Shame but didn't really want to join the harem!

And ooh the horny smurf episode of SATC is currently on Paramount Comedy. The guy buys his clothes from the childrens dept! Tee Hee

aseriouslyblondemoment · 27/01/2009 00:09

ooh how spooky speaking like exbf what if they know each other?
shame about samename2 but hope he comes back with firm date as he sounds possible!
samename1 is just an arse just as well you know now not further down the line when he could have done some damage
had forgotten about the horny smurf lol!

sincitylover · 27/01/2009 11:22

I think I would find the speaking the same (same tone, same laugh etc very very difficult even painful tbh). Because it just highlighted how much I miss exbf.

They may know each other (went to difft secondary schools) but I'm not going there.

Small world even in a big city!! LOL