Active discussions

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Original poster

Just wondering - How many LP's with 3 or more kids have found a new man ??

170 replies

CrackerOfNuts · 17/05/2008 09:08

Just curious.

I know 1 person with 3 kids who found a new bloke pretty much without even trying, but thats it, don't know anymore.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
electra · 17/05/2008 14:44

Well maybe you should be a bit braver - you look pretty in your profile. When I go out I get approached a lot but not by desirable men iyswim often or it's just people looking for a shag. So it's quality that matters I guess. But I am now panicking that I will be alone for the rest of my life because I wont find anyone suitable.

electra · 17/05/2008 14:46

That sounds like a good idea Aimsmum. I would be happy to be with a guy who had children already btw.

Original poster
CrackerOfNuts · 17/05/2008 14:54

I am on ParentsAlready, but no luck there either LOL.

Spending the rest of my life alone is one of my biggest fears tbh.

OP posts:
Aimsmum · 17/05/2008 14:57

Message withdrawn

Original poster
CrackerOfNuts · 17/05/2008 15:11

I hope not Aimsmum.

OP posts:
Pinkchampagne · 17/05/2008 17:42

You won't - you are still only young, and have plenty of time.

I met my bf at a time I certainly wasn't looking to meet someone. I think that is often the way! You will probably meet someone at a time you are least expecting to.

allgonebellyup · 17/05/2008 18:31

nutty - i think you think about it all too much!
stop concentrating so hard on finding a man, why dont you just have a couple of fun flings instead of looking for "the one"?
Concentrate on getting a career up and started, doing up your house (?), reading, music, whatever you want to do!!
Just stop trying so hard and you will feel more content..

Pinkchampagne · 17/05/2008 18:36

Agree with you there, AGBU.

Judy1234 · 17/05/2008 19:30

I think it's a mental attitude thing. I've got 5. Obviously that puts some men off but if you know you've a lot to offer and are positive I don't think it's that hard to find someone.

Nighbynight · 17/05/2008 21:36

I just dont feel Ive got the time to offer anything.
By the time my work's done most days, I just feel too poisonous to speak to anyone, and end up on mumsnet

electra · 17/05/2008 21:42

Yes I completely agree about the timing thing.

mybrainaches · 17/05/2008 21:58

I was just gonna start a thread asking the same thing, was on a bit of a downer thinking, who the hell in thier right mind would want a woman with 3 young children

Divastrop · 17/05/2008 22:06

i did

i can still recall xp saying(just after i met dh)'he's just after an easy lay,what else would a 22 year old want with a 28 year old single mum?{of 3}'

i am now a married mum of 5....

i wasnt looking though,i had totally given up on men long before i met dh.i was perfectly content on my own.

electra · 17/05/2008 22:52

I want to feel happy on my own - I think that I need to be able to do that before I get involved with anyone else...

nappyaddict · 17/05/2008 23:24

i too think you need to stop looking. let it come to you. don't try to hard- men sense it if you're trying and i don't think they like it.

my friend was 29/30 when she met an 18 year old at work. she'd recently split from her xp and he was meant to be a bit of a toy boy fling. 3 years on they've got a month old baby and are getting married next may!! this baby is her 4th.

Nighbynight · 18/05/2008 08:57

agree, desperation is very offputting. But I think I am too far the other way. Every time I meet a man, I just think of the difficulties of fitting a relationship into my life.
Actually, if I am honest, Id rather get my book published than find a man

Divastrop · 18/05/2008 12:33

nightbynight-thats the best attitude to have.

nappyaddict · 18/05/2008 12:49

what's your book about?

nkf · 18/05/2008 12:53

I'm not in this position so apologies for barging in but my sister has five children and has recently married a very lovely man who has no children. It doesn't seem to be a problem for them.

Nighbynight · 18/05/2008 13:30

It is a novel about a very mean family, and escaping from them. I am doing the latest round of sending it to agents, as soon as I can get some UK paid return postage.

nkf your sister! that does give the rest of us some hope lol.

electra · 18/05/2008 13:35

Maybe we single mums should arrange a night out sometime? I don't know how closely we all live to each other...I know that I am quite near nutty.

Original poster
CrackerOfNuts · 18/05/2008 13:38

Great, so now I am desperate.

OP posts:
Nighbynight · 18/05/2008 13:45

oi calm down and dont take it personally!
I have seen desparate - some of the APs who only have a years visa in europe, and want to get married.

Original poster
CrackerOfNuts · 18/05/2008 13:53

Oh and I don't do flings, especially not when I have 3 kids to consider as imo that is just irresponsible.

I could understand you saying I were desperate if I were out every week chucking myself at any bloke that so much as looked at me, but I don't, so I don't get how just wanting a bloke makes me desperate.

Anyhow, like I said, have been single for over 2 yrs now, and not had so much as a hi or smile from any bloke, nice or otherwise, so not sure it matters, as it isn't like I have a choice anyway.

OP posts:
Nighbynight · 18/05/2008 13:55

agree flings not a good idea.

Look, you are officially NOT desparate, OK?