I have agreed to a second date on Sunday, but.....

[Pinkchampagne]

he wants to take me to see a spy thriller!!!
I can barely contain my excitement!

[lifebeginstoday]

Well normally i would, but this is a tiny village and I'm the newcomer. His family is one of the big farming families in the village, and have been here for generations so it'd still be me who would be hounded out. the newcomer city girl, recently separated....

[Pinkchampagne]

That's really horrible, especially as he's married with children!

[lou33]

about a year ago i had a married man who kept asking me out

the first time he asked i politely said thank you but i am busy

the second tiem he asked i said no thank you, you are married

the thrid time he asked i said i wasnt going to meet him as he was married, and he said he didnt understand the big deal as it was only lunch


so i said in that case if he would just give me his wife's number, then i would call her to make sure she was ok with it, and if she was then we would have lunch

he stopped asking then

maybe you could do something similar?

[lifebeginstoday]

Good idea! He asked me had he said something wrong...and I said 'yes...I do'! He didn't get it at all. I have told him I wouldn't even contemplate getting involved with a married man, and he just can't seem to grasp it at all.

[Pinkchampagne]

Sounds like a very good approach, lou, and it obviously did the trick in your situation!
Could be worth a try, LBT. This creepy man needs stopping.

[lou33]

it was amusing how his face paled when i suggested calling his wife

it was really annoying, he used to bring a gaggle of mates to play pool where he knew i would be so he could try hitting on me with the old "my wife doesnt understand me we are only together for the kids" routine

[lifebeginstoday]

OMG Lou...I've had that too! he actually mimicked his wife over things she supposedly says to him at bedtime! And do they really think that kind of behaviour would make us want them?????

[lou33]

oh it's really common, you would be surprised how many men use that in the hope of gaining sympathy and a quick lay

[Pinkchampagne]

Oh they all come out with that rubbish don't they??!
My strange stalker type isn't married (can't think why??), but I know that men trying to have a bit on the side, all come out with that jargon! If their relationship is that bad, why are they all still in the relationship?!!

[lifebeginstoday]

PC...for the kids of course

[Pinkchampagne]

Or at least trying to sort their relationship out, rather than trying to get sympathy lays!
Tis all a load of rubbish!

I would maybe try to take the approach lou did, LBT, because you can't have this weirdo stalking you & harrassing you in the way he is - it sounds really really horrible & quite frightening.

[lifebeginstoday]

Well it IS quite disturbing as he has twice turned up late at night...10.30 ish and his face has just appeared at the window, knowing I have an injunction against XH! Stupid man, almost pooped myself!

[Pinkchampagne]

Oh yes, another familiar line!

[Pinkchampagne]

So would I, that is awful!!

[Pinkchampagne]

Can you not report him to the police for that? It is totally wrong.

[Pinkchampagne]

Or at least threaten to

[lifebeginstoday]

I guess I could, but it would open a pandora's box and I just know it would backfire on me. Also his sister is my kids' new headmistress!

[lou33]

i would call the police mext time he does that, saying htere is an intruder on your property

[Pinkchampagne]

What have I let myself in for?!!

[lou33]

ooh are you excited?

[Pinkchampagne]

Not sure if excitement is the right word, Lou!

[tribpot]

Off you go, enjoy new man and scrummy Matt Damon!

[Pinkchampagne]

Ohh, scrummy Matt Dillon! Now I'm excited!!

[tribpot]

Damon, darling, not Dillon Although way to impress new bloke "oooh, Matt Dillon's in this, he's ace"

[Pinkchampagne]

Sorry, not concentrating fully! Was very behind & still wasn't dressed, and he is coming at 7.30pm! Had to come on here quickly before I went out though!