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Original poster

Number 2 Thread When You Are Fed Up With The Solitary Burden Of Single Parentdom

988 replies

Solo · 01/01/2016 15:12

Happy New Year and Happy New Thread to all the single parents looking for a place to rant, rave, moan, share the highs and the lows and chat with people that know! It is the second thread and probably a slow one if the first is anything to go by, but it's here when we need it.

LINK TO THE FIRST THREAD

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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Original poster
Solo · 02/02/2017 11:35

Hope you are right Flowers

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Foslady · 04/02/2017 09:09

Ended up with his chuffin' cold!!!Angry

PollyPelargonium52 · 04/02/2017 13:15

Poor you Fos sometimes men are just more hassle than they are worth eh. Perhaps my opinion was wrong from earlier too. :(

Original poster
Solo · 04/02/2017 23:51
Flowers
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Foslady · 05/02/2017 09:48

Telling myself it's his loss Polly - annoying as we had the same wapped out sense of humour and outlook on life.
Anyone got any spare cats...??!!!!

Foslady · 05/02/2017 09:50

And just as hacked off that I had a v rare full weekend on my own, perfect for a longer 2nd date, and I want to go and see T2 but seeing as I'm all cough cough cough I won't go as it hacks me off when others cough through a film!

Original poster
Solo · 14/02/2017 00:03

It seems that my son hates me. I don't know what I've done, but he hates me. Some of me feels like just turning my back on him, but he's my son and I love him. I want to be in his life and I want him in mine. I just want to cry :( Where did I go wrong?

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Foslady · 14/02/2017 18:03

Oh Solo - I'm sure you will have done nothing, except love him, care for and about him, made him a priority about yourself, everything us mums do.....and one day he will realise this. It is heartbreaking, and I wish I could give you a proper hug, what's the expression about the ungrateful child and the sharpness of a serpents tooth? I know I'm not much help saying all this, but I don't want you to feel alone x

megletthesecond · 14/02/2017 18:08

Oh solo Flowers. It's not you love, he's been a handful before hasn't he. What's happened?

Original poster
Solo · 15/02/2017 00:48

Thank you both. I don't know what's going on but he only contacts me when he wants something these days and then he texts me to apologise for not being in touch. Then we spoke and he was upset as he thinks he's bi polar so I said perhaps he needs some help from the doctor which he doesn't want; doesn't want pills. He was saying he feels suicidal but I think that's down to a row with his gf although he's talked of suicidal thoughts since he was 7/8 years old. I tried top offer advice, he was fine and then the next time I called him he told me to leave him alone. I can't do right for doing wrong and I'm scared for him. I'm afraid he'll get into trouble as he said he's having thoughts of extreme violence towards people and he likes it. He's punching walls to stop himself doing stupid stuff. He's not a violent person by nature he is soft and sensitive. Mental health issues seem to run through my family ~ both parents, me (although I'm very even these days and not had a relapse in decades), my brother is depressed currently. Ds has physical problems with hypermobility which can get him down too. He's 18 now and I can't do anything to help him and I can't keep an eye on him as he lives with my mother and she is blinkered...I so need a hug, but have no one to give me a proper one.

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Foslady · 15/02/2017 01:02

Oh Solo at times like this I wish we lived closer ((((hug)))).
You really have done nothing wrong-and by being there for him as a sounding board is as tough as hell, you are being there for him. Is there anyone else who you could try and get him to talk to? Anyone at college, work, mates? You know you always have us lot here for you, don't you?x

PollyPelargonium52 · 15/02/2017 15:39

Solo sorry to hear about ds's problems. It would be better if he went to the GP over thinking he is bipolar perhaps he is scared to face it. You can still help him from a distance by keeping in touch so try not to feel you aren't doing anything as you are still in his life no matter how loosely.

Don't they go a bit changeable in these teen years anyway after all some of it may be his age too, even if he is 18.....

Original poster
Solo · 15/02/2017 23:40

I had a long chat tonight with his best friend who said he is also worried about Ds. He has said he'll keep an eye on him as much as possible and I made him promise that if he felt I was needed that he'd phone me.

Ds doesn't sleep; he finds sleeping so difficult to do and when he does it's not at the appropriate time and then he can't wake up. He has Scoliosis which I've read causes or is related to sleep problems through melatonin deficiency. I think he feels that he isn't listened to with regard to doctors and maybe that's one of the reasons he won't go. He's stubborn too.

Thank you for being here for me Thanks. I usually just struggle on alone, but I really do feel alone in this. Ds's best friend did give me a hug tonight though.

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Foslady · 15/02/2017 23:46

It's good to know others are out there for him and can see what you can see.

megletthesecond · 16/02/2017 13:57

I'm pleased his friend is supporting him too. That's a positive.

megletthesecond · 21/02/2017 13:47

Three words. Staying. With. Family.

AngrySad

Back later, driving home today.

megletthesecond · 21/02/2017 21:15

We're home but thanks to my families insistence on feeding ds colossal amounts of crap he's lying in bed / on the loo feeling sick. They've done this before but think I'm being a control freak if I dare to suggest he maybe shouldn't eat a silly amount of food. They can't understand that he's just a tall skinny kid and think I'm not feeding him enough.

As hard as it is at home at least I've got the rest of half term off .

Hope everyone else is muddling through ok.

Original poster
Solo · 21/02/2017 23:50

Hey meglet! You have half term this week then? We had last week. Try to enjoy it Thanks.

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megletthesecond · 22/02/2017 10:05

Hi solo, for some reason Hampshire is off this week. The roads were empty though so I'm not complaining. We seem to break up for Easter a week later than other counties too.

DS was sick in the night and seems lot perkier now. I think he's looking forward to getting back to normal food and some fresh air.

Original poster
Solo · 22/02/2017 11:19

Well I hope you have a great week :) I love it when the roads clear during the school breaks too ~ such a less stressful thing to drive anywhere!

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megletthesecond · 22/02/2017 11:57

And, the best thing is that the dc's aren't fighting. DS is lolling on a chair sipping water and DD is ignoring him. They're only nice to each other when once of them is ill Hmm.

megletthesecond · 22/02/2017 11:57

one

Original poster
Solo · 23/02/2017 00:20

Sickening for something? Hope not!

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PollyPelargonium52 · 23/02/2017 06:05

Spring is on the way slowly it is cheering me up hope everybody feels the same. :)

Original poster
Solo · 23/02/2017 08:37

Tes it is! But it's still formally almost 4 weeks away! And that means that I will be the next digit up in age Hmm:) eeek! Hope all is well Flowers (will I ever call you anything else?)

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