Number 2 Thread When You Are Fed Up With The Solitary Burden Of Single Parentdom

[Solo]

Happy New Year and Happy New Thread to all the single parents looking for a place to rant, rave, moan, share the highs and the lows and chat with people that know! It is the second thread and probably a slow one if the first is anything to go by, but it's here when we need it.

LINK TO THE FIRST THREAD

Apparently I'm making everybody unhappy by not accepting to be unhappy myself. If only I could suck it up for the next 19 years as well, everybody would be happy (except for me of course, but that's been blown out of proportion, apparently I don't have it that bad)

The man is deluded. He's cheesed off with me for not putting up with his s**t.

So I'm joining ranks with you guys. I've always wondered about letters after my name, I've just added LP

We're still living together, moving out in July sometimes. Then it can become official

Sounds familiar Wire ...

Heart I have a feeling I know who and which thread, but please PM me and put me out of my misery . Yes to being a single parent ~ always. My Ds is nearing his 18th birthday and I've never had a man live here with us. Dd's (she's 9yo) father was too busy with his OW and when caught, he chose all 25 stones of her (sorry, but I'm still a bit bitter nearly 8 years on) and it all made sense...There has been no one since.

Wire welcome :) We are a good bunch on here and we all know how you feel in one way or another, so just post and be with us .

I may have lost my shit today . DS was having a tantrum about column subtraction on mathletics which he has done hundreds of time before. I started to help him by writing out how to carry over numbers and he was using a totally blunt pencil, despite the fact we have a billion fucking pencils and sharpeners. So I hurled the pencil across the room and stormed off to find a sharp one. He looked at me like .

I made them go on a long bike ride this afternoon so the house didn't descend into WW3.

Welcome 8fence .

Thank you for the welcome :)
Yy to sharp pencils. I lose my rag with stuff like that, too. It's the 'I haven't got a rubber' that kills me. We have kilograms of the darn things.
So I went to smiggle and bought a pencil case with everything incorporated (ruler, rubber, sharpener), it's the homework pencil case, you borrow anything from it, I'll blow a gasket.

Love the homework pencil case idea, I have one of those too! Saves me hours of 'mum, I need a pencil' moments.

My exH is taking our three children for the week - he sees them once every six weeks or so at the moment, i haven't told him our youngest aged 3 has chickenpox and I feel a bit guilty.

But it's time he remembered to be a dad for a bit. I'm going to book a nice haircut and try not to worry too much about my chickenpox baby

Hi all. Back to work today after a week off. If my boss corners me within 30 seconds of me walking in and before I've got my computer (they have form for this ) on I don't know whether I will scream or cry.

Home life is feeling a bit tough at the moment. DD broke the living room tv last month and I can't get another one until the middle of this month. The dc's keep whining for their hudls and making a mess being creative.

Oh dear meglet - is there any chance you can find a tv repair man you never know maybe it can be fixed?

flower she'd smashed the screen up. It had to go to the electrical recycling skip at the local tip. I've got my own small tv but you forget what a calming influence some tv can be on kids. I've got to hang in there!

Oh no! meglet :( How was work? I went back yesterday; hate it in so many ways! Life would be so much easier and better if I didn't need to work Dd is at my Mums this week and she misses me so much, it broke my heart :( :(
How is everyone else doing?

Easter school holidays dragging on a bit isn't it!

Had an argument on the 'phone with my ex. He really is annoying.

Was going to get the car serviced today but can't be bothered with catching buses from and to after in the pouring rain so put it back a couple of weeks. Car services have gone really costly too.

Apart from that life is much the same as usual! Which is good really. As I certainly don't want a man in it!

I find school holidays tough. I usually end up having to send DD away to her dad's. He never let's her contact me when she's with him so it's tough for us both It doesn't help that all the smug married are posting their Easter skiing/ beach holiday pics on FB (I know I shouldn't look...)

I'd still rather be single though!

FB is best avoiding during typical 'family' times.

Do you know though, since I became single all I seem to hear from my married friends (who six months ago I was moaning alongside) is how unhappy they are. Some of them are clearly being emotionally abused, others I'd bet my life their H is having an affair. When I was married I was caught up in the catharticism (sp) of a mutual whinge but now I'm hearing it from the outside and I realise how unhappy a lot of people are. Like I was.

Still, that doesn't make me feel better at 3am when my baby is awake.

Very tearful today! (Pregnant haha) Had one of those lightbulb moments, although somewhat stupid it took so long!

ExP told me when he left he didn't love me anymore, we both deserved better etc, he didn't mean to meet someone, it just happened...blah blah blah, standard.

But I believed him...I felt so rejected, guilty, upset, hurt - all the emotions you'd expect to feel if someone you loved said that to you really!

But looking at things since he left and said all that...he has actually cancelled on his daughter countless times...often at short notice (3 times he did it last month!)

He was never a terribly committed Father, although there's no denying he doesn't love her, he just never grew up to face his responsibilities.

Yesterday he messaged to say he would "struggle" to see her as he had made plans this weekend (with his new gf no doubt, who won't have her kids either, just saying) and it was then that I realised this wasn't my fault! This was just about him, being self-centred and selfish and not able to look past the end of his nose!

Who puts "plans" before your own flesh and blood and claims it's a struggle when we live 5 minutes around the corner?

It's made me feel rubbish that this is the Father of my children and that he will no doubt always be like this with them but the realisation that he tried to blame everything on me (I'm by no means flawless!) and now I'm seeing things for what they are is just insane!

I think now I got a lucky escape whilst my children are still little. I hope he's having a super early midlife crisis that bites him on the arse =)

Sorry to vent ladies - not many RL people to talk to! Hope you're all ok =) x

Oh vent away!! :) That's a good thing to be able to do on here! :)

Definitely. I think sometimes you just need to write it down to get it out of your head =) xx

Dilys you're absolutely right about people moaning about their relationships.

Some of the stuff I hear makes me very, very glad I don't have to put up with that kind of crazy shit any more.

Does make very cynical. Is anyone in a relationship actually happy, lol...?!

Clash... vent and rant away. Loving your light bulb moments. It's all SO much clearer when you get a bit of distance.

Congratulations on your pregnancy... when is baby due (love a summertime baby!)

ittoo, I love your username. I try and live by that!

Very hungover today after a night out with some friends. Bit depressing as seemed to be full of older gentlemen on the pull. Not sure I was really getting much attention either. Guess I'm not 30 any more!

Think I need to give that kind of thing a miss for a good while.

Hi. Could I join the thread please? I used to be on MN years ago and then lost track when the kids father walked out. 6 years late I am still, happily, single but oh my life it is hard. My DC's are 18 and 13 now, so in some ways gets easier and in others can be just as demanding. I have a free day and I don't know whether to sleep, garden, paint, go for a walk, and yet don't want to procrastinate my precious free time away. And I'd trade my soul for a strong armed hug just now....... Anyway, if it's OK, hello to all x

Hi all, I'm a single mummy to a 2.5 year old and feeling rather sorry for myself tonight. It doesn't matter how hard I work, I never have enough money and I'm penny counting the whole time. The paternal person doesn't give me anything sadly, it's just so hard doing this alone emotionally, physically and mentally. Sometimes I think I'm happy but not sure I am. I've been single for four years now and the thought of a relationship terrifies me. I just want to give my DD a nice life, is that really possible when it's just me!

Welcome grace and lolo :)

I left mine for 7 h on the hudl today. I'll do the motherly thing tomorrow, today...I took a break.

Welcome to our new lone mummies! Get stuck in it is very hard at times and I totally get the "Sometimes I think I'm happy but not sure I am" sentence lolo! I feel just the same after 7.5yrs on my own.

Dilys I don't get a look in either these days :( hope you feel better!

Grace mine are almost 18 and 9 now; don't see too much of the eldest, but of course, I have the youngest to consider at all times. Love them both to bits though :)

Sadly I have spent a lot of time reversing the damage of a domestic abuse marriage. My son in particular was a real mess. It is only the last six months where he has stabilised. I get the comment about thinking you are happy but not beig sure.

I am much happier, and don't envisage myself in another full on relationship. I have a supportive 'companion'. But it is all I am capable of. The everythingness wers me down. From homework, fixing stuff, finding stuff, working, mental support, emotional support, trying to be fun and yet be consistent...... Domestic things, gardening, any hiccup that life throws our way, Everything. Always. So yes. Happy. But so, so tired it might not seem that way sometime!!

We seem to laugh a lot so it's OK.

Thank you for the welcome x