Fed up with not having anyone to share the burdens with.

[Solo]

Bit of a self pitying thread really, but it's taken me a very long time and I can now say with conviction that after being on my own for so long...

I am fed up with the burden of being alone.
I am fed up with struggling on my own.
I am sometimes lonely.
I have no single parent friends or single friends at all and my 'social life' ha! what a joke is visiting my widowed Mum or visiting my Brother.
I miss my Dad terribly.
I can't get a job.
Not one 'friend' has spoken to me so far this summer holiday (except one that lives on cloud fluffyland in her mansion and that really cheers me up because shopping is her passtime!).

I could write a very long list of problems and yes, I know we all have problems, but I just don't want to do it on my own any longer, I don't want to face the problems on my own :( I could cry right now and need a real 'man hug' and I don't care who knows it!

I work at home too, it's a lethal combination for a single parent. The lack of adult company in the day is a killer.

Sorry to hear about your ME solo.

Namechanger I find hobbies can help e.g. piano playing - when there is a spare 30 mins. - can you find a hobby that takes you away from it all.Right now with stress even 15 mins a week is all I can find however but this phase will pass!!

Waaah. I am so tired. To most people I look awake but I can't take in any information and am simply nodding at the right places. The only saving grace is that I don't have to drive to work so at least I'm not going to do something dangerous.

Dd's sleep is tipping near 10:30pm and ds is up to his old 6:30 wake ups so I'm getting no brain space or downtime for chores, errands, lists or even watching TV. I had so much more energy when they were small.

Ok, just got home and something nice has happened . My mum had to drop something round while I was at work so she ran the Dyson round and straightened up the kitchen. At least I can see what has to be tidied now.

That's nice then for you Meglet. Hope Solo is ok and no doubt she will reappear any moment!

Update; still doing well on the 'not buying the dc's any clutter ' promise. We went to the London museums yesterday and only bought one good book. There was a near meltdown from dd when I wouldn't buy her another fecking slinky (previous 2 broken) but we got out of the gift shop alive .

I'm avoiding any more threads on the tax credits question time woman. At least she's doing something! Last time I checked there weren't many jobs that fitted around 4 dc's for a single mum.

Yes she sounded like she was really struggling, I didn't vote Tory but I did feel sorry for her.

I am feeling very lost in the evenings. I am not a huge telly fan, so I can read or something, but generally I snack and sit on MN every night. It can't be good, what do you ladies do?

On the plus side I have been to the gym and signed up with a personal trainer so I can finally get healthy again.

It is lovely having weekends with the DDs but very tiring!

Well done on the no clutter rule Meglet, that's a tough one to keep you are doing far better than I would!

Hello all :) I'm sorry I've been AWOL for a while. Am not feeling brilliant atm. Flower you must be psychic! my ME is playing up right now and I'm in a lot of pain (legs mainly). Thank you for asking . Weirdly, no one irl bothers to ask ~ I think it's because I don't really complain, so they forget I have it...it's so much a part of my life, that I just carry on regardless.

I'm sorry if I'm missing anything or anyone out, but I'm just throwing out the odd thing here.

I really need to get organised at home; the place is just a tip.

How are you all doing?

Sorry to hear the ME is playing up Solo. I wish you all the luck in the world with it.

I have had to tell ds's father to not see him unless it is supervised access e.g. McDonald's owing to having assaulted our boy on 5 occasions over the past 2-3 years. In August ds returned from a week away with yet another mark on his cheek. I forgot to take a photo I did not remember. I emailed him over this yesterday. Ds isn't allowed to go down to his London family either for 5 whole years. I can't put him at risk again like that and can't take the strain. Social Services were informed but they do precious little to remedy the situation and all they achieve is to throw their weight about and visit the home of the survivors and not the perpetrator and he just carries on with his life escaping unscathed ......! (

I have also found out that my ex has NPD a friend clocked on and told me and am getting over the shock. Flies into rages and other issues.

Am going to revise my finances and from about spring 2016 i.e. next year plan to stop all contact with the ex and his father for a considerable time i.e. 5 years I need a break from it I can't take the strain anymore. I won't be asking for a penny from him from March/April or so I have had enough on relying on his 'help'.

Neither of us can afford the courts and legal aid doesn't exist anymore except in very rare cases so it is no point getting a solicitor involved.

I have told ds's half sister who is lovely to him and they are both very fond of each other that I will email her every so often with photos and updates about ds and that I thanked her for all her kindness to him over the years. Their family is very closeknit and ds deserves to have that since all I have is parents deceased, no siblings and cousins far away and stuck up cold middle class so not any family support of my own. Except a 90 year old aunt who is on the way out she was lovely when she was in her eighties moral support on the 'phone but at her age I wouldn't pile on any stress.

Sucks huh.

Thank you for reading ladies and apologies for such a long thread.

Have a great day all of you. )

Thank you Flower , but poor you :( I think you need the luck.

I'm assuming that you aren't near me as I'm London side. Shame, as I would have tried to be helpful and supportive.

Life isn't easy is it?

Thanks Solo.

Today is one of those 'if I broke a bone I could actually get some rest....' days. I really thought that at the ages of 8 & 7 I would get some sleep, but it's never really happened. DD remains a night owl and ds wakes up earlier than is civilised and gets under my feet while I'm tying to get organised for the day.

Hope its sunny where everyone is. It's nice down here. Rain tomorrow apparently.

Meglet that must be so tiring for you on your own with them so close in age like that. People have no idea do they! Hopefully you aren't an ole bag like me I have only the one child and he is 10. I am 51 and knocking on a bit. He is bionic and unfortunately I am not the best sleeper so even though he would sleep through a hurricane if we had one I am awake after 6 hours sleep. I go to bed at 9 pm as my clock is out of sync. Evenings I am exhausted.

My sleep is wonky as I have gone eccentric since living on my own for 10 years. That said I would never have a relationship again they have never made me happy. I am up from 3 am invariably full of beans.

Weirdo that I am!!

At least I am not inconveniencing a bloke and the neighbours don't object either. I try to tiptoe around as best I can lol.

flower funny you should mention going eccentric. I'm getting dreadful for talking to myself. Even DS mentioned It the other day . I do it at work too.

Me too! Always talk to myself and answer too

It's not just me - looks like we are in good company then! (talking to ourselves)

I'm going to grow old as crazy 'talking-to-herself' guinea pig lady .

It's awful having so little adult interaction isn't it. No one talks in my office, I'm climbing the walls the by time I go home.

Know what you mean meglet I have always been a chatterbox. My ds however boy can he talk. He could give lessons in it! It runs in the family my mum was a real one for being garrulous too she could talk nineteen to the dozen.

I wear purple a lot so it looks like I already befit the well known poem 'When I grow old I will wear purple'. Not sure who it is by?

Although I do a great deal of Buddhist chanting which helps stress no end sometimes you just need some ADULT conversation don't we....!

Forgive me fellow LP'S for I have sinned . I went onto a tax credits thread and had a small rant.

Hope everyone has an ok half term lined up. I'm only at work one day so we've got time to slow down a bit. I have possibly too high hopes of tidying up the allotment .

Meglet that DOES sound very industrious - an allotment wow! How on earth do you squeeze that in?

Especially in a cold October with white skies to go out on an allotment wow. :)

Hello all :) I hope you are having a good weekend?

flower weeds don't grow in the winter . Even a 30 min visit feels quite productive this time of year. rainy August's are the worst time of year