Thought Post below was relevant to all babies
There is always room to learn and grow together with our beautiful children, adopted or otherwise
It's OK not to know everything as a Mum too
Us parents do stuff up at times
See Post below:
If love is not enough, what is?
(29 Posts)
Italiangreyhound Fri 09-Nov-12 23:30:35
Sorry if that sounds like a daft question.
Lots of people say it, Love is not enough! So what is, to make a adoption a success. (Maybe I would need to define 'success' but I think you know what am asking. What aside from love do I need to give/do/be?
Any helpful comments, welcome.
Thank you.
Devora Sat 10-Nov-12 00:43:21
You need loads of empathy - to be able to really understand your child's point of view, and separate it out from your own view/ needs/ perspective.
You need to be able to fully accept and embrace the responsibilities of parenthood, while understanding that your child had other parents once, and one of your jobs will be able to help them explore that, even if it sometimes feels like a rejection of your love, even if it means being generous about people who hurt the child you love.
You need to be resourceful, able to work out what your child needs and advocate for it.
You need to be able to accept your own needs and imperfections, ask for help when you need it, accept that you have limits, forgive yourself when you fall short of the standards you set yourself.
HappySunflower Sat 10-Nov-12 00:46:52
Positivity.
Keeping your focus on helping the child to feel safe and secure- because that will help to build positive attachment, for you both.
Patience. It can take time for love to grow, and the timing is different for everybody.
Being able to talk about how you are feeling to your partner, friends and family. Asking for help when you feel you need it.
Seeing it as a journey helped me, a journey with an unknown destination, but where the route you take is actually the most important part!
I enjoy most days with my daughter. Most but not all. And on the days I don't enjoy, I keep my focus on the fact that the next day is soon to come smile