Where have all the fit, interesting and available men gone (part 30)

[lilacisinlove]

Yay! I did it again!

hello everyone i have an appointment for thursday at 12:40 but at least it will hopefully be sorted out and i can stop stressing.

though on the other hand, we move into new house in less than 3 weeks. received contracts today. i phoned the social fund to check on progress of loan application and guess what??? they haven't received the form back yet if they'd printed on the lousy form originally that they wanted a breakdown of what i needed the money for, i would've had it by now and be completely stress-free!!!
arrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggghhhhhh

aurora - good :) do check in with us before you go, so we can wish you well. :) x

Took. Bloody buggery Mr B. git. i am absolutely outraged on your behalf. truly. I have my OKC profile up at the moment, sod knows why. you'll have a brilliant six weeks with mini, though. :) lots of cake baking.

I'm not sleeping well. worried about the house situation and my DD - although I think a lot of this is 2nd hand from the ex and he projects guilt all over the place. she doesn't seem too perturbed.

oh! ex started a job today. his first in seven years! clearly his outgoings once working take precedence over mine

no train man today. very sensible of him! I'm off to a fancy-schmancy international womens day event tomorrow (at a 5 star hotel on bond street, lunch included...where we can discuss an international perspective of the suffering of women in the developing world....and the capsule wardrobe... ) so i'll be in a frock/power suit tomorrow. poor train man.

ignoring PM in solidarity with took :) got in to email from him this morning, where he suggested we act-out/read through the breakup scene we are currently writing for the screen play. I'm pretty sure that involves make-up sex, right!? just in the context ofwriting from an honest perspective... everything for my art!!

Oh ffs paranoia has kicked in. I am obsessing and convinced he hates me. Why do I do this?

So seemed fine yesterday. Hasn't said a word to me all day, not even scrabble or the obsessive poking war. I don't think i can be doing with this emotions thing. I have clearly been reading it all wrong :(

Phone dead.

(sorry - entirely self centred today )

flame, you can be your own worst enemy! Mind you, I did something similar on Sat, mine was dead by 9.30am and I was out til 8pm. TLOML said it was the first time he had ever been worried about me (usually I don't give him a moment's peace so he doesn't get time! )

cheers snape. though really i cant be outraged can i?
i have no reason to be outraged...
even though just sat he told me he loved me and wanted to be with me.
Just confirms ive made the right choice, and despite everything its time to move on ( which i decided in jan)
:)
Please remind me of this fact in a few days time!!

HOW can pm want you to go through that sceen..... infuriating. gggrrr. of course...do it!!! lol.
:( at lack of train man.

flame - hes probaby just out. or busy. :)

aurro - gggrr. bloody stressful. hope you get it sorted.

elasta - hope gw works out though.. or are you not really feeling it?

beaitician - hows you? been quite the last few days.

hello all...

so will start with the good news, another 4lb off at the weigh in this week, which given my massive curry and wine binge on friday isnt actually that bad

date for sat didnt happen, he went a bit flouncy beforehand and pissed me off - doesnt take much - so I decided to ignore him and not arrange it

meant to be seeing the nice one this fri but he has postponed til next fri as he can't find anyone to have his DC. Am prepared to give him the benefit of the doubt I think - what's the consensus? He was v apologetic and did say he really wants to meet....and I'm the awkward one who can only meet on fri's!

so we'll see.

work is not good, all to do with end of year reports etc, will be having lots of rows meetings over it this week I expect.

and Ex is being his usual pain in the arse self. Last week I found out he was telling the children that I was a shit parent, and that I expected too much of them. Today he text me saying I am not to leave either of the boys at home without me ever as it is not appropriate and how I should inform him what arrangements I make to ensure this doesnt happen.

I replied and said whilst the children are in my care its none of his business. That appears to have shut him up for now. I was tempted to say that once he starts putting his hand in his pocket (rather than leaving me to pay all the bills plus his £40k of debt) then he'll be in a position to dictate what does or doesnt happen. But I thought that might be a little inflammatory

it was a train-man day! i studiously ignored him, although sitting opposite him, to throw him off the scent! :D

horrible international womens day corporate do with a load of well-heeled succesful business women, feel utterly exhausted and ill, due to far too much caffeine and lack of sleep - going to have a very relaxing evening - bath, camomile tea and an early night. done in.

evening, if anyone who isnt on my fb wants to see the latest pics of dora and eddie, i have just put some on my mn profile

dora's one was taken this afternoon, and eddies a couple of days ago

hope you are all well :)

Ohh Lou, I love your pics, you are a good looking lot, you the kids and the dogs!! Pleased to see both Dora and Eddie looking better.

My dog1 is in the vet on thur for an operation to repair her knee. Have my fingers crossed for her. she is really lame ATM

Quiet day here. Another message from GW, he is coming up for the day and staying for dinner on Sat

Thank you elasta. Hope it goes well on thurs :)

hi hi

Aurora did you have your check up?

hey everyone, sorry have been a bit quiet

Loving the dogs Lou, they look great, after all that trauma so glad they are recovering so well

Elasta, great to hear it's going well with GW and I promise no finger-wagging over Traveller , just reallty glad you are enjoying yourself. Hope the op goes ok for your pooch

Snape, I will ping you on FB so I can belatedly see the pic of TM, glad he truned up again this morning. I did pmsl at your description of 'stealthsnape'

Took, I will happily remind you about Big

Great news on the continued weightloss Sponge, ggrrrrr at XP though...

Hello everyone else

No news here, domestic bliss I am afraid (DD2 is being a stroppy madam but I won't bore you with that!)

Have stopped surfing for dresses, am saving my energies for a shopping trip yet to be arranged, want to do some RL swishing in front of mirrors

Hi to MILY, Men really are like buses here.

GW has beeen messaging me, and I had a call from traveller this morning to catch up after the weekend. Said he will see me next week when I am up there with DS2. Typical, havent seen him for 6 months then he pops up again just after I have met someone else.

I give up. The man blows hot and cold on me so much. I have no idea where I stand. Haven't bothered contacting him today, if he is interested then he can contact me, but I can't cope with this pissing about.

Flame are you talking about Smurf?

Yeah, sorry. A bit all over the place today. One of the baby bunnies died (not my bunny but much cuddling has been done), my mum's dog doesn't look like he will make the week (old age), XH is muttering about moving to sodding Wales, and Smurf has been decidedly odd and quiet since Sunday despite being absolutely fine and talking about when he was next seeing me when I left him.

I have no clue what is up and I am tired of caring and being hurt tbh.

oh, flame. god rest you merry babybunny. :( so sad when pets are unwell, even if they're not yours, they're just little-lives thatyou want to protect. I can't stand anyone intentionally being cruel to animals. DS2 is still traumatised about the time he accidentally flicked a caterpillar from his leg into a camp fire

still feeling a bit unwell, heart has been racing since yesterday - am def giving up the ciggies again, makes mem want to vomit. being physically unwell always makes me feel emotionally low. I start in on a huge big 'no-one will ever touch me again' thing. stupid head-tape!

took, hope all well with the abstinance! Aurora, how are things?

TM this morning - platform was nuts, and there was a change for the second train, the one i normally get to ensure a seat. TM stayed on the original platform, but after i'd secured a seat on departing train, watched me trundle away. There was eye contact!

getting the tube tomorrow, as going north for a day for work am fully aware he gets the vict line. (might have accidentally ended up on same tube platform as him yesterday stealth-snape, comedy-tiptoeing....

Ok, have sent him a message asking if we're still on for tomorrow. Horrible feeling I will just get no response. wtf happened? :(

Yay for eye contact

ooohh. good luck with the comedy tiptoe-ing.
lol
excellent :)
and good luck with the stopping smoking. we all get a bit like that the 'huge, no one will ever touch me thing' from time to time. it will pass....

im doing very well. still no talking to mr big :)
if i think about it i get very pissed off. not because hes seeing someone. like i said, i cant be angry about that, not really. But because he lied about it. He should have told me. And becuase its just not on to tell someone you love them, when you are with someone else. Its just not on at all.

Flame, sorry about the bunnys... and i hope he texts you back.

mily - shopping trip sounds fab....:)

and elasta. men are indeed like busses!!!

anyway, had a weird text today from someone i had one drink with in the summer. wtf is wrong with men.
if i didnt want to see him for a second date then... why on earth would i want to 9 or so months later...
and did i tell you that policeman still texts about once a week.
WHY???
why do they think i will change my mind.
idiots.

on the plus side DD wrote me a note today. first one ive ever got, she only started school in jan. She wrote ' i like mummy, love ( her name). I didnt even know she could spell those things.. i accused her of copying.. but she had nothing to copy from.
bless her heart.
:)

place marking as the search thingy keeps saying there aren't any messages for me

from me i should've said!

i've had a quick read through and promtply forgotten it, am very sorry

well, the budgeting loan still hasn't come through but guess what? they now want payment for a previous loan that i thought i'd already paid! bloody typical so now won't be able to get full amount i needed. gd has said that i can borrow some money off him if i ever needed it but it doesn't feel right though i might have to

vimes also agreed with my suggestion that i visit the credit union in my town to see what they suggest - tho i am a bit concerned as i don't want to be charged exhorbitant/extortionate repayment rates.

well it's d-day today for my appointment, i'm not here (vimes' home) tonight though i will be tomorrow, i will try posting an update when i've taken dd to her ballet class (thank god her dad pays for that!)

bye for now

minitook