Parental Responsibility & Schools

[halfa]

Posting for brother ... Also posted in legal, but hes desperate for advice.

x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

My son has now been proved to not be mine biologically (5). I was on his birth certificate and as such had PR. We have court approved DNA test saying i am not father.

Ex has taken this into school and stated her intention to remove me from BC, and requested that school do not share information with me. First i heard of it was when i turned up today to make an appointment for parents evening next week.

They have said i am no longer entitled to information!!!! Is this correct? At the moment i am STILL on the birth certificate, so surely i still have PR?

I appreciate it will go eventually, am currently refusing to sign the declaration the registry office sent to me and i will be applying for a PR order in the new year.

But in the meantime i could do with advice on the legailities of the school. Dont want to go in all guns blazing if they are right, but dont want to just accept this either.

Thanks

you didn't know she was liar from the OP.

happy, i didn't say anything about the woman. i disagree completely with lying about paternity. it is a disgusting thing for anyone to do.

I assumed, correctly, that she had lied about paternity, and I am only privy to the same information as you and everybody else on this thread.

When I see that a man and child have had paternity disproved after 5 years ... yeah, it makes me think badly of the woman. So shoot me lol

And you're doing it again Booyhoo...knowing what I do and do not know, and whether or not I gleaned that information from the OP.

Especially when that person is then trying to block that "father" out of the child's life in such a spiteful way.

ChocHobNob, absolutely. If you are going to be shot then shuffle up...me and NiceGuy have to take our place nest to you in front of the firing squad!

Next to you, not nest....doh

so you knew from the information in the OP for definite that this woman was liar and a cheat?

Booyhoo....er yes. I fail to see how you didn't. However, if I had made a wrong assumption I would have admitted it instead of banging on and on about it to hide the fact that I was wrong.

Booyhoo
The OP has confirmed that the assumptions made were correct. Why are you still arguing?

OP am so sorry you are going through this.
Hopefully someone with knowledge of the legalities will be along to advise shortly.
The mother sounds horrific.
She lied about paternity, and now it no longer suits she is removing the Father from the child's life. Poor kid.
Indefensible.

As I said, I read into it that the father had been told the child was his, and now that had been taken away from him. How is that not lying and cheating?

i didn't automatically assume she was a cheat and a liar from limited information because i don't hate women. i wait to hear the facts before labelling someone. not that i would label anyone a slapper anyway

Morecrack...exactly. Lying about the paternity, even if she knew it could be either the OPs brother or A N Other, is disgraceful. If there was the slightest doubt about the paternity she should have told him. Of that there is, or should be, no question.
On top of that, taking the child away from the man who believed he was the father, and presumably the child thought this too, is cruel and disgusting.

Booyhoo....forgive me but you are talking crap. How can I hate women...I am one! What a ridiculous thing to say . However, neither am I a man hater, just a liar hater.
And nowhere did I label her a slapper

niceguy labelled her a slapper. i didn't say you did.

you don't think women can hate women? oh my.

Urgh, I think we're going off topic here, focusing on issues of what opinions we should have for OP's brother or OP brother's ExP, isn't really helping OP.

I think the real issue here for a 5 year old is going to be the relationship between child-bio-farther and relationship between child-nonbio-farther (i.e. what do they know and how do they feel about these relationships). It's my experiance that the court will go with blood is thicker that water in these matters, no matter how much time and effort you spend on a relationship with the child. Hence you need to speak to someone legal who's delt with these issues before to get a feel for what your brothers expectations should be.

OP...I am so sorry about your brothers situation, it must be heart breaking for him. it's imperative that he takes legal advice, and I take my hat off to him for fighting this and not just walking away.

Booyhoo...let it go would you? Oh, I know from MN that there are many female misogynists, it is demonstrated on here every single day. However, your assumption, just like your assumption about the OPs post, is wrong. So let it go, and just accept you are wrong.

let it go? because you say so? er, no!

where am i wrong? i said you made an assumption and you agree you did.

OP...he can get a free half an hour/one hours consultation with a solicitor where he can test the waters and, as nerdy said, get a feel for what he can expect. If needs be he can go to several to see what the general consensus is. Good luck to him

...yaaawwnnnn

thought so.

booyhoo I've read and agree with you. It's shocking the assumptions made based on very little information; regardless of whether those assumptions turned about to be correct or not.

This is a terrible situation for the man to have been mislead into thinking a child is not his the fact that it is when sorting out contact that the woman said the child might not even be his anyway suggests she knew from the start which does make her a liar. She knew the child could have resulted from another sexual encounter she had whilst they were on break even so lying that it is another man's child is very very low.

Quite interesting that your brother (OP) still wishes to have contact which without knowing all details is good news for the kid.

I assume that the woman wants her new partner to be the child's dad, I am not sure what positions are open to him especially if his PR are being removed. You would be best advised to see a solicitor they would best know what options are available to you.

As to the arguments about assumptions true it is not good to make assumptions but when it comes to light that those assumptions are kind of true it's best to let the argument drop as it really doesn't help the OP.