support thread for people who find it hard as LPs...

[simpson]

just wondering if this has been done before...

I have 2 Dcs (2 & 5) and am bringing them up by myself (H allowed to have phone contact only due to his fuck wittery {I love that phrase })

Sometimes its soooo hard doing it by myself

DS had parents evening today and although his comments from teachers were fab most all of the other parents were couples.

Sometimes it hits me that I have to do everything myself

Today has been a bitch!...

I hope tomorrow goes okay Scorps

Jellycat - what's up? why has today been so bad?

Scorps - sorry about your grandad, but glad about D

Re ex and his wanting to meet me to see kids - I've found out his bail conditions after harassing me mean he can't contact me OR the kids except through a solicitor and can't even enter my London borough... yet he was proposing to meet me outside local police station.... very weird! Anyway have told his solicitor that looks like he can't see kids from what bail conditions say, so hopefully that's that for now....

Oh splishsplosh, that sounds clearer, i'm hoping that's sorted out now

Just struggling with being skint and bills.Poor DS1 is having a car insurance claim made against him,and as he is in the middle of his last degree year, i'm battling on his behalf.plus he got a lot less money this year and has nearly run out(next grant mid April)he needs to eat properly as we have a inherited illness called 'Gilberts syndrome' and i can't help him out financially,plus lots of walking in the rain to catch bus as i have to scrap my car,plus tired due to perimenopausal night sweats,plus hurtful texts from XP last night,and feeling very alone..

Phew!Rant over,feeling well sorry for myself!! Not much joy to balance it out today..i'll get back to normal tomorrow..promise!

jellykat - how are you doing today??

I went out last night to see my mum give a lecture at our local university which was good. My dad babysat.

My mum is also coming to get DS at 5pm today and she is having him overnight and taking him to the cinema tomorrow.

Pity she can't have DD too, as she is the one who drives me up the wall

Think I might treat myself to a takeaway tonight (sod the £££) as a reward for getting through half term in one piece!!

Am starting to get excited about my night out on saturday too

bookmarking. I always mean to come on here but I am incapable of multi-tasking threads and stick to my old PN one. I tried to be a slattern once and couldn't even stick to that

I hope your X calms down one day . Mine hasn't been in touch since last May (and even that was when he was harrassing my mum!) so hopefully he won't resurface.

Hello Meglet

Today was ok. Mum and Dad gone home now too :(

yep definately Indian

DS has just gone and is going to see some 3D film tomorrow.

DD is having her milk and will be in bed around 6ish, then the house is mine!!!!

Sorry Scorps When will you see them again??

Meglet - I also tried to be a slattern once and could not keep up with thread either

splish - hope you don't have ny more hassle from Ex

Scorps think of something cheery.. When is your next 'night of passion'?

poppadom anyone????

I have eaten so much I feel sick

poppodom - yum!

what is this mysterious slattern thread - sounds right up my street!! Though I am also rubbish at multi tasking - I fear it was a rumour started by much better women than me!

Got another letter from his solicitor today saying nothing to stop him seeing kids, just can't approach them directly to arrange contact - they are 5 & 2 so that seems unlikely anyway! - I don't understand how a condition saying he cannot contact them directly or indirectly except through solicitor means he can see them directly??? I don't mind him seeing them, if they are happy to see him, as long as I am not involved in arrangements at all but don't want to do anything against the conditions as that would look very bad for me i think

Meglet - I'm glad you (and your family) aren't getting hassle any more - how is your eldest now about him? Does he still talk about him?

Jellycat - sounds like you're having a very stressful time - hugs, and - whichever would help most

Spish - its under good housing keeping (or whatever the heading is called )

Basically you post in the morning with all the jobs you need to do in the day, then tick them off when they are done...except I forgot to tick them off, or what I was supposed to be doing

Your DC are roughly the same age as mine (5 & 3) My H has had a solicitors letter to say he is not allowed to have any contact at all, but DS got upset so I basically said he could se them in the Easter holidays but he has shown no inclination yet

Simpson - oh no.. that sounds like it requires more organisational skills! - I need a thread to comfort me over what I don't do, and all the things I keep putting off!

sorry about your ex - it's very sad for your ds

I don't mind them seeing him, but i'm not going to do anything against bail conditions as would look stupid that on the one hand i am saying he has harassed me, on the other don't take notice of what the court has put in place to protect us - I wonder if that's exactly what he wanted when he proposed meeting outside local police station???

Splish i really think you need some legal advice, even if it's just a one off appointment-just to find out what it all means..

The other alternative being- starting a thread in 'Legal', i bet there's lots of MNers with experience of this situation.

Jellycat - funnily enough i have done just that! great minds etc

{grin]

Fingers crossed x

Oops ...

splishsplosh excuse me if I barge in ... just wanted to say yes if you do have a court order do not make allowances even during a ''quite'' spell caus it would fire back

hi everybody

JellyKat r u feeling better than a few days ago?

ps btw, he is still talking to me

Oh JFTO That's excellent news!

Am good today,thank you for asking

splish Not sure if you've already tried it but have you ever considered a contact centre so your xp can see the dc's? We tried it (he didn't turn up).

DS does mention his dad sometimes, I think it's partly because his friends talk about their dads he's more aware if it these days IYSWIM. There are a couple of photos of him in the house too, as bad as he was it seems wrong to wipe away every trace of him. Having said that I hope he stays out of the kids lives until they are adults and he can't hurt them / screw them up.

DD (3) has just asked why her daddy does not live with us

It all came about as H texted me to call him (he won't spend the £££ on a call ) to say he won't be calling DC tonight (the only time he speaks to them each wk) because.....wait for it....

He is going to tescos

FFS

Good news today is that the pasport office called today to say DS's passport has been approved so at least he is going to Italy

Hi everyone I've been a regular lurker on this thread, I feel like I know you all...

Anyway after nine months of 18 hour days up at six and work til midnight, paying for everything coping with everything my ex has finally taken my kids for the night for the first time.... (thanks ex I really needed it)

I've had a really hard time and been judged quite harshly anytime my kids have had tantrums or not behaved in public and not said anything so this is my first night with no pressure, no cooking cleaning childcare or anything yayyyyyy

Where is the wine? Cheers to all, for all the support you give.....'s all round

Hello beingsetup and i'll join you for a !

DS2 is at a friends tonight..It get's a bit hairy when they get to Secondary school,as they want to stay at friends'houses,and you've never met the friend let alone the family...A fast bit of detective work is required ,and thank god for mobile phones..A scary business tho'..

Oh simpson He's definitely not improving is he?!
but,good news on the passport front

I've eaten an entire family pack of Jelly Babies today!

Yes where are the smileys for sweets and crisps - i have a vast bag of walkers sensations beside me at the moment

JTFO - you're not butting in at all, any advice is welcome! I'm certainly not planning on seeing him, but he's allowed to see the kids, would look into how he could i guess - have thought of contact centre but not sure he'd go, Meglet. I did speak to my safety officer today to keep her updated - she said ignore the solicitor's letter or write back to say he should go to family court to get access

Tescos - what an idiot

I am working my way through a pack of star bursts

DS came back from my mum's poorly So he went to bed early, I had both DC in bed by 6.30

Just hope he is not ill tomorrow as I am out with friends