Oct/Nov 08 chat

[mellow2]

..can someone please tell me where the day has gone?
and, more relevantly, why i've failed to make a sufficient dent on my (groooooooooowing) to-do list?

it's the builders' questions, i tell ya..
i'm the colours person

..and sfx, i know you're better qualified than me to comment because of your old job..

shite, that time already..

I remember listening to a programme where the person in charge of the Climbie enquire and subsequent recommendations was practically tearing his hair out because it was not about lack of policy but really bad practice, they offered a few examples illustrating just that point where children had died, since Climbie for similar problems, it is frustrating and I think quite a few should be fired

my only concern is that it may then be seen as problem solved when really many authorities have similar issues and this child will not be the last to die

am as qualified as anyone to have an opinion

to do list?

of course, and you've got more professional knowledge on the subject, too, than most, i meant.

more like a to-don't list, i fear

i know, that's the terrible thing, isn't it? there are so many "faceless" other children in the same position

have given up on to do list today and maybe even for the week and Tesco online is very slow and frustrating today
think will glue and stick with dd instead and make apple crumble for pudding

dd is ignoring me

think that is when I go all dictatorial and start going on about how some people can get pregnant and have a child without thought for the future or the welfare of a child while others willing and able just can't do it

I think the baby P issue is really sad. I think you're both right. What's mind boggling, to me, is how a mother can allow her child to be treated like that.

Steppie - You're welcome. Hope they work for you.

completely different subject, thankfully, do any of your children have the aqua draw mats? dd keeps saying she would like one but seems to me it is more on account of advertising
do they use it? like it?

While we're on the subject, I am absolutely by the English Fritzl.

Dd doesn't use hers anymore. Would mini sfx like to have it? It didn't hold dd's attention for long but I think every child is different.

mellow I think what I would like would be for dd to try one out so that she has a clear idea of what it does iyswim, looked for a trial one at mothercare today but none available

about that case many years ago there was this guy I knew in a work capacity, whose wife had died and he did similar things to his daughters, no offspring, I remember he was quite unapologetic about it saying 'I feed them and clothe them why should I not have first go' despicable creature he was, still he did not go to jail

Sfx - it's shocking that this is not as uncommon as it should be.

Sfx - I was about to take the mat to the charity shops, so you're welcome to it if you want.

mellow ok thanks that would be great, still not convinced she will engage as much as she thinks she will

sfx, it's chilling how such cases aren't one-offs, isn't it?

dd loves aqua draw..as does my niece so am buying her one for christmas. so hopefully dd will like it, too.
they're fab..minimum effort of parent's part and no mess. result!

mellow..shall keep you posted on taming of hair

Hi all,

re Baby P case, I know a social worker locally here & they were telling me about the caseload they have to manage, about how the cases go to court etc & exactly what they have to struggle against. Its hard because they are underpaid & underappreciated the majority of the time, but then you get cases like this where there should be some accountability! Mellow, I agree with you, I just cannot comprehend how anyone could allow a child to be treated like that.

Anyway, that's my rant on the subject over with for now.

Sfx, re aquadraw, it didn't hold ds's attention for long either. Every so often it comes out but for about 5mins. He much prefers his crayons & paint!

Ds & I popped round to our neighbours today who have a 1yr old dd. Ds was so sweet, giving her toys & letting her have whatever he was playing with if she wanted it. Maybe there's hope that he will be a good big brother!

do any of your children spit out food saying yuk this is dd's new thing, dh is getting really stressed about this, am guessing because of Christmas at his parens

Hi Ros am sure ds will be a good big brother, bless him

and thanks for aquadraw feedback I would have thought dd likes mess but who knows

sfx, at least she's trying it. Ds's just says he doesn't like it as soon as I put it in front of him!

well there is that I guess apparently the sticking point s skin as in potato skin etc, most green things, tomatoes (I blame Lola) peas (I blame Daisy)

steppie you must be relieved your dh is back home, awful stuff going on

Steppy thanks for drawing attention to the Sun petition

The Sun do do some good things occassionally

Whilst sympathetic to SWs generally (who would want to do that job after all) I think anyone who has read the details of the case would find it impossible to have any sympathy to the SWs in this case who, despite countless (and I mean LOADS) of reports to SS from GPs/hospital consultants/relatives/ the CM that this poor mite was being ortured and the police insisting he be taken into care, insisted this poor baby stay with his sociopath mother.

The last SW visit was 2 days before he died. He was strapped into his buggy, locked alone in the kitchen, with a broken back and broken ribs, his tiny body covered in bruises and infected bites, his left ear hanging off. The SW just said "hello little fella" and asked his mother to wipe the chocolate off his face (a common trick used to hide injuries apparently) - she didn't even look at him or wait to see what was under the chocolate

Another time he was laid on the sofa and covered by a blanket with a huge injury on his head and the SW did nothing

Whenever the CM contacted SS, the SW jut rang the mother an told her the CM had complained

No one can say the SWs were not warned again and again thathe was being tortured and was dying

This is not "just another" case of a child being battered. The details of what was being done to him are horrific beyond comprehension and he had to endure it for months and months while the SWs stood by

If anyone feels "sympathetic" towards the SW, read what happened to him and what the SW's reaction was each time

sfx, yes indeed
that's the hotel he usually stays at, too
if this had been a week ago...
have had lots of phone calls and txts and, so far please to god, no-one dh nows caught up in it
always, deep down, niggling worry about him going there sometimes as political situation so volatile and said to him, in midst of worry, he can't go there anymore (!)
of course, he looked at me like this

auntie, what really gets to me is how the doctor "missed" he had a broken back..
and how, more to the point, how he was treated was 'normal" to this baby, all he knew..

ros, sounds like ds will make a lovely big brother. he'll be so proud.

Morning everyone.

Steppie - Your concerns are understandable.

Sfx - Thanks for the info. My eco shopping bags would be the perfect and cheap presents for dd's teachers. Do you give a card too?