All those online for NZ timezone!

[buzzybee]

Hi all. Used to be a regular on MN when I lived in London but since moving back to NZ have found it harder to make the connections due to all the brits being asleep when us down under are online! So if anyone is keen to start a thread for those of us in this predicament please reply! My DD has just turned 5 and started school last week (scary). Have just found out I'm expecting number 2 - due roughly Xmas day...

difficult weekend for me that one as dp just back from an Oz trip and needs time with Ds could make it the weekend before or after, could do the botanical gardens if good weather or Junglerama if bad (gets a tad busy at the weekends though).

ooh, a meetup!

I'm writing exams, finishing on 14 June - so until then I'll be at home sweating over my books I think - after that I'll be a free woman and would love to do something!

With or without kids?! The only meet-ups I've been to (a couple in London 5 years ago and 1 in Auckland) were just Mums which was a nice excuse! But I'm more than happy for it to be with kids as well. Name your weekend in June - I have no major commitments at this point. DD loves the Zoo (we have an annual pass) or we could go up the coast. Or if its just Mums maybe something in the evening or late afternoon at a cafe (or movie)??

hello all, thought I'd pick this thread back up , regarding the meetup, I'm still keen and think it may be easier for me with my DS as I'm up the coast, let me know if you have any further thoughts or plans and I'll see if I can fit in.

hello nz people

just thought i'd put a message in as our computer has been broken for a few weeks so i haven't been able to post. all fixed now. I really missed reading MN!

buzzybee how is your pg going? I think you're a couple of weeks behind me? I'm just coming up to 18 weeks. Annoyingly, someone I know having her second, due 1 day after me, has no bump at all while I am definitley in my maternity trousers now. I thought 2nd pgs were meant to show much earlier. She is about 5ft 10 though and I only reach 5ft 2 if I stand on my tiptoes so maybe it just shows more on small people...

Hi Buzzybee,am in UK but tEnd to be a nightowl.
Was born in NZ but been in Uk since 18 months.
Would LOVE to emigrate but have troUble persuading DP.!!

Oops, sorry, not been very organised about watching threads!

dd2 is a Velcro Child so wherever I go, she goes too....

I'm sweating about exams at the moment, but v. keen to do something after 14 June.

kjaysmum, is it a long drive into town for you? Let us know what is easiest for you in terms of places/times.

Hope you're well buzzybee!

No not far welliemum, 45 mins and we do it lots to visit my inlaws and friends. A weekday would probably be better for me but only if it's not a problem for the working mums and purely because Dp likes to have lots of Ds time at the weekend. Ds in daycare mon, weds, thurs morning so Tues or Thurs best, but saying that, I'd love to do a meet up so I am definately flexible if you'd prefer to meet up at the weekend buzzybee...how are you by the way. Hope you've managed to make him understand how you feel? fingers crossed for you.

oops sorry meant to say hello AnnainNZ and Wrinklytum hope your pregnancy is progressing well Annain are you feeling ok?

I'm feeling really good at the moment, just tired in the evenings but I guess that's par for the course. Met up with a friend last night who lost a baby at 12 weeks last year, has been trying to get pg again for a year and is just starting IVF. So I kind of felt any concerns I have about being tired or stressed at work just don't matter compared to what she is going through! Kind of all pales into insignificance...

20 week scan in a couple of weeks which I'm very excited about - going to have one of the 3D ones

Hi all. Afraid my life's a bit complicated. I have my DD 1 week out of 2 and the week she's with me I pick her up from school. Which means I can do after 3pm on a Tue, Wed, or Thur but only every second week! Weekends therefore probably a better bet for me - that way it doesn't matter too much if I have DD or not I can still make it.
Pg going well so far but scary to hear of 12 week miscarriages...am now 11 weeks. Seem to feel like the very hungry caterpillar most of the time! 12 week scan soon so that will be a milestone. Planning to take DD with me to make it real for her. At 5 years its quite an exciting thing for her. She's begging me for a boy! but secretly I'd like another girl.
Father is taking time out to think. I was very clear about my feelings and although he really didn't want to accept that I think he will come around and want to be some part of the baby's life. He has tried to make a couple of attempts to get together to go over the same old stuff about trying to make a go of it but I have resisted. Am feeling fairly tranquil right now which is great. Hoping not to have to tell my work for another 4 weeks...not showing at all yet which am quite proud of given its # 2 (but I am almost 6 foot).
Looking forward to meeting up with you guys. Shells might be up here too by then?

hi everyone
i am a kiwi living in london, i have a ds who is 6 months, and my hubby is english.
We plan to move back to Wellington later in the year and can't wait Though I am a bit nervous as I hardly know anyone back there any more...

Hi there KBandZak! I'm sure you will find everyone back here incredibly friendly and welcoming. How long have you been away? Mums networks worked well for me when I came back when DD was a similar age to yours - some of my closest friends now are people I met through DD's childcare. Helps that she can play with theirs while we chat! And of course if you work you soon develop a few contacts.

thanks buzzybee
it's silly to be worried i know, but i have only just made a whole heap of lovely friends here after having ds, and i feel like i am going to have to start again!! Oh well, thats what you get for disappearing to the uk for 5 years!

Hi KaybeeandZak, hey surely five years in London can't have made you forget just how friendly NZ is ?

I've been here for just over a year with my Kiwi Dp and our Ds (three now) and making friends has, to be honest, been a doddle. I love it here!

We are planning a meet up down in Wellie sometime so that'll be an instant group of fellow Mums adn Mumsnetters for you

By the way Buzzybee that's fine by me I am as I said highly fexible, being a SAHM and all that, just name the weekend ladies, apart from next weekend when I'll be in Hamilton!!

Welliemum and Kjaysmum started another thread about a meet-up. Anyone else likely to be around Wellington the next few weekends? Shells?
My 12 week scan date creeps closer - only 3 days away now! In fact I will be 13+3 which just scrapes under the max limit before they can't do the nuchal test. Excited and scared in equal measures.
Also meeting a midwife for the first time Monday night. VERY hard to find given baby's xmas due date. She only agreed because I said I might be interested in a homebirth as that's what I had in London. Only prob is that here I'm at least 20 mins drive from the hospital the first part of which is a windy road...didn't seem much of a risk getting from Pimlico to Chelsea & Westminster if it all turned to custard. Have had 3 friends here have near misses recently - 2 were over 9cm when they arrived at hospital and the 3rd delivered on her sofa at home (not planned!) Anyway nice to know I have someone for the pregnancy even if I change my mind at the end and use the hospital midwives.

Good luck with your 12 week scan buzzybee - is it Tuesday? That's when my 20 week one is

he he he kjaysmum, of course i haven't forgotten At least having a baby really helps when you need to make new friends, there are so many mum and baby type groups around!

How exciting about your scans buzzybee and annainnz. I saw a friend the other day who is 7 months pregnant, and when I touched her bump I feel all sad, I miss mine!! And I get clucky when I see newborns and my lo is only six months!! How mad is that! Def not looking to have another this soon!!

Hi AnnainNZ! Yes scan was today - 13.3 - and met midwife for first time yesterday - its all happening! Baby was fine in as much it had 2 arms and legs and a beating heart but they weren't able to give me the nuchal fold results immediately - apparently these will be posted!!! But I did take away half a dozen images and comforting to know that nothing looked to be obviously wrong. How about you?

Glad the scan was good buzzybee, hope your nuchal fold results have come through and are good too.

At my scan they found something called echogenic foci in the baby's heart, they are calcium deposits and can be a marker for Down's. Was a huge shock as we obvioulsy weren't expecting it! It can mean nothing, apparently quite a lot of foetuses (foetii?) have them and they just disappear. My doctor has contacted the hospital to get me a more detailed scan with a specialist who can look for other markers for Downs. As far as I can tell, if no other markers are found then my risk of the baby having DS is only slightly increased, but if they find other markers obvioulsy it's a different story. On hte positive side, my nuchal fold and blood test results were really promising (chance of DS was given as 1 in 2000+) so I'm keep reminding myself of that.

Anyway, should be seen within 48 hours or maybe early next week to have the detailed scan. My dr stressed that I'm still classed as low-risk because my nuchal fold and blood test were so good, she's getting me an appointment so soon becauswe she could see how stressed I was about it. Work have given me the rest of the week off so dh (who has been fab and very positive) and I are sitting at home watching a season of the Sopranos on DVD.
Trying not to worry unnecessarily but it's bloody hard. I think it was just the shock, after such low-risk earlier results it didn't even occur to me they would find anything wrong. Everyhthing else with her looked fine - sonographer 80-90% sure it's a girl. Have some lovely 3D photos of her face but bit upsetting to look at them at the moment.
Anyway, long post but it's been an eventful few days.

Annainnz, I won't say "Don't worry" because worrying is what we all do when pregnant, but your doctor sounds reassuring about it being low risk. It's good that you're getting more tests quickly - must be stressful waiting for results.

I think they do often see odd things on scans that turn out to be nothing in the end - I bet this is the case for you too.

Best wishes to buzzybee too for a good nuchal scan result.

Ohhh - so sorry to here that Anna. I am in a state of shock too I'm afraid. Nuchal results came back at 1:21...have been advised to have an amnio, which would be next week at the hospital. So many things going through my head. Do I want to know? Would I terminate if it was DS? What would be in the best interests of DD? Could I cope on my own? I realise that there's still a 95% chance its fine but 1:20 still seems mighty high. I'm guessing you're having some of the same thoughts. I have read through some of the other threads on here by people in the same situation or worse (1:3 etc) and they are kind of helpful but in the end its going to have to be a decision I make on my own. I guess I'm tending towards having the amnio even tho there's a risk of MC - because at least if I do know and I still decide to proceed I have 6 months to prepare myself. I knew I was fairly high risk due to my age but I guess I just didn't believe it would come back at this level.

Oh I'm sorry buzzybee that you're going through this. It's frickin scary isn't it. I've just had really mixed messages about how much of a risk this is, some people think it'squite a big risk and some hardly at all.

I can't really give you any advice about an amnio, we haven't decided yet if I will have one. The only advice I've been given is if you do have one to rest as much as possible afterwards, 3 days with your feet up, someone told me (easier said than done though). Am thinking of you and keeping everything crossed that you get a positive result.

Thanks for the info on the amnio Anna. I hadn't realised that was the recommendation but makes sense in terms of minimising risk of miscarriage. Am thinking that there are other options like taking that maternal serum test in a couple of weeks and/or waiting for the 20 week scan and seeing if there are any of those soft markers you are talking about. But none of those will give me the definitive answer like an amnio - just more information on the risks and possibly more confusion. Good luck with your scan next week - do you know when it will be yet?

Buzzy, just got my date for second scan, Tue 26th at 1.30. Glad I've got a definite date but scared too.

Do you have support around to help you with decisions you're having to make? I just ask because I know you're not with the baby's dad now and it must be so horrible going through this alone. I am all ocnfused over all the options - well, I know what they are but it just seems like a hard decision. Have amnio, know for sure but risk mc? Or have scan (blood test and 20 wk scan in your case) and hope for best? I'm going with just the scan for now.

i think if you really feel the uncertainty (of not knowing for sure) will get to you then the amnio is a good idea. I actually read today that they can only do amnios up to 20 weeks, so if thats true I couldn't have one now anyway - kind of a relief as it takes the decision away from me. Mind you, I read that on Wikipedia and i've heard conflicting stuff about their accuracy.

Anyway I hope you are feeling as ok as is possible and getting through all the day to day stuff as best you can.