Mum pancreatic cancer, on syringe driver how long?

[ILoveaSunflower]

Looking for a hand hold and some advice.
Mum was diagnosed 8 weeks ago with stage 4 pancreatic cancer that has metastasized to the liver.
Her decline has been shockingly rapid and she is now on a hospital bed at home with a syringe driver for the pain.
I have been spending as much time as I can over there but also trying to work ful time with two kids.
I'm wondering if she's nearing the end and I should get signed off to be there with her everyday? Or if I've got longer?

It probably won’t be long. Check your company’s compassionate leave policy, they vary a lot, many though will not pay you though should allow emergency unpaid leave

I would think it won't be very long now.
I'm so sorry @ILoveaSunflower

I think once people are given the syringe driver it’s often only days to go. I’m so sorry, went through the same with my lovely mum with the same hideous disease- she was on the syringe driver for her last 48 hours. I would definitely get signed off work and be with her as much as you can

It rather depends on how she currently is. Is she awake much or sleeping most of the time? Is she still eating and drinking? Recently a close family member had a syringe driver fitted and as previous posters have suggested, she didn't live very long after that. But it can be longer depending on many factors.

I'm so sorry, it's very hard. I would try to have frank discussion with her medical team. I had huge support and direction from the district nurses who visited daily.

I’m so sorry. My friends FIL was diagnosed around the same time and passed away on Monday.

I’d be with her as much as possible.

She can't eat food anymore just the odd protein shake that the doctor prescribed. She gets very tired and sleepy and sometimes falls asleep drinking one.

It varies- I work in palliative care. We often start people on drivers when the oral route is lost or absorption is reduced. Realistically, when someone is no longer eating or drinking and is drowsy/asleep most of the time, we’re looking at days. Very sorry OP.

So sorry you are in this situation, I think given her reduced oral intake sadly your time will be short, I would look at some compassionate leave from work asap. Spend the time you want with her now xx

Every blessing to you, your mother and your family.

My professional experience (nurse) with pancreatic cancer is that if she’s at the point of significantly decreased oral intake and needing a syringe driver, it’ll be sooner rather than later. Take the time off. If she stabilises, you could go back for a bit, but I can’t imagine you’re able to concentrate anyway.
When my Mum was at this point, I tried to work and my manager sent me home! Take the time off. Be kind to yourself.

I’m so sorry. Now is the time to spend as much with her as you can. Get signed off if needs be.

I'm so very sorry. I think I would ask for compassionate leave straight away. Spend as much time with her as you can and draw in support from friends and other family to help you out with the children if you can. Look after yourself too.

My FIL had the same and went downhill very fast after the driver was fitted.

We had about 2 days after he stopped taking sips of water and was asleep the majority of the time.

Id definitely get signed off work, it will still be there after this difficult time.

Sending you so much love 💐🕯

I wish someone had told me that the syringe driver meant bot long. Sorry OP.

My mum had pancreatic cancer and was on a syringe driver at the end - it was really only days. I'm so sorry OP, I don't think it will be too long now. I would start to get organised at work and sort out anything you need to for the DC. My deepest sympathies to you in the days ahead

This is the hardest question because absolutely no one knows the answer 😞As a nurse who cares for people at end of life I would presume that your Mum is coming to the end of her life but not necessarily tomorrow.
If she is still swallowing and comfortable with the SD I am guessing not imminent.
Just sit with her when you can,offering ice lollies,lip salve ,chatting about how much you love her .
When she stops being verbally responsive please remember that she can hear right until the end,so be mindful of everything you say .
Sending love to you.🌸

So sorry OP. I’m not medical but I’d say you have maybe a few days or at most 10 days. Wishing you strength for the coming days

Thank you. I have an instinctual feeling that it will be soon and this has given me the boost to be brave and take some time off to be with her. I have an amazing husband who will look after the kids thankfully.

My lovely Mum died off this same horrible illness. After the driver was fitted she lived 3 days. I'm so sorry your Mum is going through this too. Pancreatic cancer seems to get diagnosed very late and there is nothing that can be done then except relieve the pain and you could give her company as she passes.

Yes diagnosed so late. No real symptoms except niggles that could be put down to normal ageing and a bad knee.
She had a pain in her side eight weeks ago that we thought was just gallstones and now look where we are. She's 71 so not young I know but such a shock how fast it's going

Sorry to read this, OP. It is cruel. I hope your Mum is as comfortable as can be. Wishing you strength xx

My mum was 3 days once on this stage.
be there x

I’ve always been told hearing goes last so talk to her too

My dad lasted 2 days after the syringe driver. It was the most peaceful he'd been for ages. Sending you so much love and hugs OP.

Sending big hugs and love to you and your Mum …a beautiful lady died on my shift a couple of nights ago. As myself and her daughter said…Mums are irreplaceable 🩷🩷🩷🩷X