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Original poster

My DD3 has stage 4 Cancer

550 replies

ToddlerMumma · 18/08/2021 21:46

We are in shock, horror, disbelief. Last week she had a sore leg and went to A&E, now she has stage 4 Neuroblastoma and chemo starts on Tuesday.
She's only 3 but she's taking it in her stride. She cried the other night and said 'I don't want to be sick, I just want to go to nursery with my friends' it broke my heart.
The implications are just hitting, our whole lives are turned upside down for at least a year. One of us will have to give up work, how will we cope? Financially, emotionally.
I have a black lump in my stomach and can't believe this is happening to us

OP posts:
Mayhemmumma · 27/08/2021 21:45

What a little star! And what a relief for you I'm sure, now you can look ahead to those two lovely weeks at home.

myrtleWilson · 27/08/2021 22:03

Am so sorry to read your news @ToddlerMumma - am glad that the start of chemo has gone well (aside from Peppa Pig for 8hrs!) If you're on Instagram you may want to look up @mammaandtbear - Her son Teddy was diagnosed with the same illness a couple of years ago. Her posts may both be difficult to read as you recognise yourself in them, but also may give some comfort and hope as to outcomes. Teddy is about to start school and is doing really well.

howtodealwithit · 27/08/2021 22:07

@ToddlerMumma

Hi all, she started chemo today and she has been amazing. No pain or sickness and a good appetite. I'm a bit jaded from playing Peppa pig and paw patrol for 8hrs :) they have the anti sickness drugs spot on. Another 3 days of chemo then one day of fluids then she can come home again for 2 lovely weeks 🎉 I have a true little trooper 💜
Aww she really does sound like a trooper!
Askinvillarblues · 27/08/2021 22:09

My heart goes out to you from one oncology mum to another - my son was diagnosed with a form of Hodgkin’s Lymphoma last July, relapsed in November with stage 4 (turns out he had the rarest and nastiest variant of his particular cancer) and has just had clear scans this week after 6 months of tough chemo. It’s hell, I won’t pretend it isn’t, but I found things easier once we got into a routine with the chemo and understood how the cycle of ups and downs would generally go…there were usually a few surprises along the way (infections, random blood results etc) so learnt to expect the unexpected, but we felt very supported by the oncology teams and also by Young Lives Vs Cancer who several people have mentioned up thread. They can help with DLA applications and other things too. Take all the help you can and don’t be afraid to tell people what you need them to do (shopping, cleaning, just being there to listen or actually to talk about things other than cancer…). The first chemo cycle was the worst for us - it didn’t get easier as such but we were more prepared for the ups and downs so they were less of a surprise. Hang in there, you can do this x

Msfoxy17 · 30/08/2021 20:58

Hi @ToddlerMumma. Thanks for much for coming back and posting again about your lovely DD and the start of chemo. Have been thinking about you since you posted before and hoping all has gone as well as it could.
I don't know if the treatment days are consecutive but if they are, hope she is now home and doing well. Sorry not to be able to give any useful help or advice but just wanted to let you know we are thinking of you. Take care.

user1471519931 · 30/08/2021 21:03

You are doing an amazing job, my heart goes out to you. Sending you warmest wishes and strength ❤️

Original poster
ToddlerMumma · 30/08/2021 21:33

Thanks for your support. She is on day 4 ( last day) of chemo and it's started to hit her. She's not sick or anything but very sleepy, lethargic, spaced out. It's quite hard to watch. All perfectly normal the docs say. Looking forward to her being home on weds until the next round in 2 weeks.

OP posts:
LowlyTheWorm · 30/08/2021 21:46

Oh bless her wee soul. And huge hugs to you too MamaBear. It must be so awful to want to take that all away from your precious child but have to paint on the smiles for her sake. Take care of yourself and have a few real Moments in the privacy of the loo or the relatives rooms etc. CakeBrew as the hospital food isn’t always fab and you may not have managed a fresh cuppa for a while.

JacquelineCarlyle · 30/08/2021 22:27

She's amazing Op (as are you all). Remember to look after yourself too, as hard as that may be.

Frazzled2207 · 30/08/2021 22:33

Sorry to hear your awful news. We're all here to support you in any way we can.
If i helps at all I do have a friend who went through similar last year with her 6 year old son. All done and dusted with treatment for now, he is doing great and she is back at work after several months off. She has said to me many times how absolutely amazed she was with the medical team and also McMillan. And she truly felt that her son was given the very best treatment possible. I'm sure the same will be for you and your dd. Wishing you all the best.

ADHDmaybe · 30/08/2021 22:44

Hope she’s doing okay

MLMsuperfan · 30/08/2021 22:49

OP seconding the calls to look after yourself. This will draw on you for everything you have, but you can only give so much. Remember to be a little bit selfish occasionally.

adeleh · 31/08/2021 01:07

Thinking of your little girl, OP. I'm so sorry you're going through this. She sounds an absolute trooper.

ZednotZee · 31/08/2021 01:12

Thinking of you all OP, your DD sounds amazing Flowers

Forecast123 · 31/08/2021 06:53

It must be a relief to be on the last day of chemo and so good that she will be coming home soon. Hopefully she will recover quite quickly from the chemo once home so you can enjoy the two weeks between!

It’s so hard seeing the side effects of the chemo on them isn’t it. My son had chemo last week and has been fatigued, vomiting and has stopped walking (again). He is just starting to get back to ‘normal’ now. I had a little cry to myself at the weekend at how different he is now to before, but I know it doesn’t help to compare.

Thinking of you and her.

Lifeisbeautiful01 · 31/08/2021 09:08

Like many others, I have no advice but I’m so sorry that you are having to go through this.

Mummapenguin20 · 08/09/2021 18:50

Hope your enjoying your two weeks at home

Original poster
ToddlerMumma · 08/09/2021 21:32

Thanks @Mummapenguin20 we had to go back in for 4 days as she had a temperature spike but home again now.
It was her birthday yesterday - 4 years old! We had a very small party where she ate cake and jumped on the trampoline... then was sick and overwhelmed and wanted to read books with me inside... at her own party! Managed to persuade her to read them outside and her little friends came over and sat on the rug while I read them all stories, it was sweet.
Today we had a very gentle walk in the park - like 300m. She's been knackered since, it's really taken it out of her. We will totally slow life down for her now. We're back in hospital tomoz but only as outpatient for blood counts, dressing changes etc. I learn new stuff every day and still feel overwhelmed. Time will ease that I hope. Thanks for your support so far xx

OP posts:
BoneWithTheWind · 08/09/2021 21:51

Really hope you're having a lovely time with your daughter at home, @ToddlerMumma. I'll be thinking of you & your little girl. I struggle to understand how life can be so unfair - especially to young children... :-( Sending you all lots of love & strength xx

JacquelineCarlyle · 08/09/2021 22:36

@ToddlerMumma just checking in to wish you well.

Glad she had a lovely 4th birthday - she's a little superstar. Stay strong (as tough as that is - you've got this (even though 'this' is a big pile of dung!)).

adeleh · 09/09/2021 04:46

Happy Birthday to your lovely girl.
My kids would have loved storytime at a party xxx

Rainbowqueeen · 09/09/2021 05:10

Happy birthday!!
You are doing an amazing job with her. Look after yourself too though

whatabelter · 09/09/2021 05:42

Thinking of you OP and your daughter.

Starryskiesinthesky · 09/09/2021 05:52

Yes thinking of you too. It must be so hard as a family so even if you think you are doing ok it is really important to get some support / time for yourself as well 💐

MLMsuperfan · 13/09/2021 16:10

Rooting for your little one and you. Hope you find some moments of lightness amongst everything.