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Original poster

Autistic meltdown in public - charged with a crime

152 replies

Tirednorthern78 · 27/04/2024 19:34

Good evening

I'm after some advice. My child is newly diagnosed with autism spectrum condition and recently had a meltdown in public. In this melt down they have kicked me and bit me, and I've pushed them away twice (first time in response to the bite and second time to attempt to contain them from bolting.

I've now been charged with a crime, maltreatment of a child, got to go to court and make a plea despite a social worker assessment confirming where a warm and loving family. So concerned, and frankly worried as if this happens again in the public what do I do? Let them bolt? Let them physically hurt me?

I can't believe this is happening frankly. There was no marks on my child to indicate I've used force. I was attempting to protect them from bolting and my other 2 children who were with me at the time - one of whom is only 6 years old

OP posts:

quirkychick · 29/04/2024 13:33

hamletomelette · 28/04/2024 16:45

Op my son is autistic and we've had to deal with aggression and violence. There is little help available for this and it is more difficult as they grow. This could very easily have happened to me.

It's difficult not to feel hopeless and alone - i hope you don't mind me letting you know what I have found really helpful when things were at their worst?

Newbold Hope Family Support group - Facebook- lots of families living with child to parent violence. Great resources to read and her videos are so gentle.❤️

Google free course: to "7 Steps to Regulated & Resilient Parenting" by Illuminate U.
Helped the trauma i had relating to being 'attacked' to reduce and helped me panic less each time it was happening. Ive slowly got more control over myself.
You really have to suspend disbelief 🙂 cos it appears a bit new age but it is worth putting aside just ten minutes a day.

We have started a course on TCI - which helps with deescalation and eventually safe restraint.

We've also had to act a little defensively - so reducing demands on him - and I have now got to the point where if I think things will get difficult I don't take him out on my own. It's important to reduce the number of times you are going through this as much as possible.

Keep going you are doing your best and better than most could manage x

Thank you for those recommendations, we've been trying to access similar courses for 3yrs and all the professionals keep telling there's nothing available for parents.

Karatema · 30/09/2024 22:59

@Tirednorthern78 how are you doing?

My DGS is early teens and had a meltdown as him and his DM entered a supermarket. Security called police and then helped DM to pin my DGS to the ground. Police arrived promptly but just as DGS was coming out of it. He is strong and bites, his DM is slight. Police looked him up, they are called by his DM at least once a month, realised this was genuine restraint and self defence.

I hope sense was seen by everyone?

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