House in will - issues/second marriage

[needadvice54321]

Hi all

This is an awkward issue that we have and I wondered if anyone knew where DH stands with it. We have no idea, so prepared to be told we're unreasonable.

DH recently sadly lost his Dad. In his will both DH and his brother inherit the house.

DH's mum died 20 years ago. The house is the family home. My father in law married again several years later and he and his wife (my MIL) lived together in the house.

As part of the will, FIL stated he wanted his wife to be allowed to stay living in the house for up to 2 years post his death - absolutely reasonable.

Now here's the awkwardness - obviously now that FIL has passed, the house belongs to DH and his brother. MIL obviously isn't paying any "rent" to live there ( DH wouldn't want to charge her rent) but here's the issue - in the event that there's a problem with the house, who should be sorting it? ie paying? If it's DH and his brother, is it reasonable to request that nothing is done without their agreement?

This week there has been an issue. MIL immediately dealt with it (it could have waited for DH - wasn't urgent), arranged someone to fix it and is now handing the bill to DH and his brother.

DH is unhappy, he feels the arrangement should be that MIL is more than welcome to stay obviously, but she does at her own cost.

FIL left money to her that she has access to now - it was any money in joint accounts. DH and his brother have no access to FIL estate until MIL moves out and they sell up. MIL also has an income and a generous pension, so we don't feel she's being left high and dry.

What do we do? Pay for this? Make an agreement? Or are we obliged to sort this? Do we just suck it up?

Surely they have become her landlords? She could bill them for allsorts!

I forgot to add - MIL has hinted at DH and his brother footing other bills (ie Council tax) so it feels that possibly if we let this go then she may ask for more and more. Again, it's possible we're being unreasonable not sorting it out, but if not how do we deal with that

I’m
Not sure legally where they stand (might be worth asking the solicitor who handled the estate?) but I think if she plans on living there as her home either she pays for her own repairs and bills (like council tax etc which she would have to pay anyway if she was renting!) or she treats them as land lords in regards to repairs to the house but then also pays rent of some form

She can’t have the best of both worlds

I'd give her a choice. She can either live there, rent free but responsible for bills and maintenance, or she can pay them market rent and pay the normal bills (utilities etc) and they are responsible for maintenance or she can move out.

You need to look into occupation rent....
Lots online. Basically you can charge her market rent. If she has right to be there as is the situation here - it can be negotiable between the parties...

@VettiyaIruken

I'd give her a choice. She can either live there, rent free but responsible for bills and maintenance, or she can pay them market rent and pay the normal bills (utilities etc) and they are responsible for maintenance or she can move out.

This with bells on 🌺

Nothing specific in the will, I take it? Does DH have a copy?

I think some of these responses are harsh on the mil and very short sighted.

She’s loosing her home. Two years is not a long time. Why should she pay for repairs when she’s moving out and the ops husband and his sibling benefit in thr long run.

I think set a limit, anything say fifty quid or less, she pays, but anything major like a new boiler or whatever they pay. She needs to pay the council tax.

Charging her rent would be against his fathers wishes. He clearly didn’t wish her to be a paying tennant in the home.

The men benefit from any work done. Pissing her off snd demanding she pays is going to force her to leave some jobs undone. And let them build up for when she leaves.

Personally I’d pay for the repairs. All of them. It’s her home snd she’s loosing it, and I’m the one financially benefiting. She was his father wife.

This is an interesting problem - I've never thought of it before. My children have inherited their dad's half of his home, with his wife owning the other half and having the right to live in it until she dies or sells it. I hadn't thought about what should happen if eg a boiler needed replacing, that sort of thing. Surely they wouldn't have to pay?

I'm no lawyer but I agree with @VettiyaIruken.

The weird thing is that surely before DH's father died she paid her own council tax and maintenance bills, or at least they did together? It's very odd indeed that she thinks these costs are someone else's problem now that her husband has died...?

If she can afford to pay for this, as it sounds like she can, then I think it's best to say now that she can either pay rent or the bills, her choice.

Good luck!

Thanks all

I'll look into the occupancy rent, thanks @Easterbunnygettingready

We really hoped not to have these sort of problems!

They shouldn't be paying for anything. If she wants them to foot bills ( council tax excluded, we all pay our own ) she should be paying rent.

Where does maintenance end, too? She might want a new kitchen or bathroom, or rooms to be redecorated or have new carpets.

@Purplewithred

Nothing specific in the will, I take it? Does DH have a copy?

Nope nothing at all

@Bluntness100

I think some of these responses are harsh on the mil and very short sighted.

She’s loosing her home. Two years is not a long time. Why should she pay for repairs when she’s moving out and the ops husband and his sibling benefit in thr long run.

I think set a limit, anything say fifty quid or less, she pays, but anything major like a new boiler or whatever they pay. She needs to pay the council tax.

Charging her rent would be against his fathers wishes. He clearly didn’t wish her to be a paying tennant in the home.

The men benefit from any work done. Pissing her off snd demanding she pays is going to force her to leave some jobs undone. And let them build up for when she leaves.

Personally I’d pay for the repairs. All of them. It’s her home snd she’s loosing it, and I’m the one financially benefiting. She was his father wife.

@Bluntness100 , we wouldn't expect her to pay for things that benefit the house. The example of what happened this week was something that could have been fixed easily by DH or his brother, but the first they heard was when she'd got someone in to sort it and was handing them the bill as in her opinion it's not hers to sort out.

It just feels like where will it end? At a minimum it feels that DH should be asked before any work is carried out.

In the long term DH and his brother will inherit the house and the money that comes with it, until then any bills from the house come out of our household income - we can't afford to fund everything.

I think it would be quite shitty of them to start trying to charge her rent when it was clearly their dead father’s wish that his widow was given two years to get on her feet and he no doubt told her that he knew his sons would be good to her. He could have given her a life interest in the property and his sons not benefit from their inheritance for potentially decades, the least they can do is respect what he wanted to happen.

They should maintain their asset in terms of necessary repairs and maintenance. It’s to their benefit to do so. There’s no indication that MIL is going to start requesting new carpets and kitchens and bathrooms at their expense, so they can cross that bridge if they ever actually come to it (and say no.) She’s had a repair done, probably not wanting to bother your DH who is grieving for his father. Seems fair enough. Council tax and bills are her responsibility. They don’t need to engage on that.

Sadly this is one that's going to have to be handled very delicately it seems.

In your Dh's position I would clarify everything from a legal standpoint first, then suggest a meeting between the three of them and an independent third party to set out a way forward.

@panickingpat

They shouldn't be paying for anything. If she wants them to foot bills ( council tax excluded, we all pay our own ) she should be paying rent.

DH doesn't want to charge rent, it doesn't feel right. That would be a last resort

TBH it surprised me that there was nothing in the will to say how it should work

I think it would be quite shitty of them to start trying to charge her rent when it was clearly their dead father’s wish that his widow was given two years to get on her feet and he no doubt told her that he knew his sons would be good to her. He could have given her a life interest in the property and his sons not benefit from their inheritance for potentially decades, the least they can do is respect what he wanted to happen.

He could have did this, but he didn't. He chose to leave the bank account to his wife, so she's got money, she is not destitute. His wishes were to give her 24 months only. 🌺

Just tell her that you’d prefer in future for her to let DH or BIL know about anything which needs fixing, so they can decide whether it requires a professional or not. Unless there’s a massive backstory here that you aren’t mentioning, there’s no indication that MIL is an unreasonable person or that she’s going to start costing you loads of money.

@WisnaeMe , you're right she's far from destitute, there's no way we would leave her in that way.

@WisnaeMe

I think it would be quite shitty of them to start trying to charge her rent when it was clearly their dead father’s wish that his widow was given two years to get on her feet and he no doubt told her that he knew his sons would be good to her. He could have given her a life interest in the property and his sons not benefit from their inheritance for potentially decades, the least they can do is respect what he wanted to happen.

He could have did this, but he didn't. He chose to leave the bank account to his wife, so she's got money, she is not destitute. His wishes were to give her 24 months only. 🌺

Yes. Precisely. As I said. He could have done that, and ensured her security to the detriment of his sons. Instead, he has trusted his sons to look after his widow in the short term.

I would have my solicitor tell her that council tax & utilities are hers to pay; maintenance on the house itself should only be undertaken with DH & BIL agreement and quotes etc needed. I would include boiler service in this.
White goods - repairs etc are hers on the proviso she can take them when she leaves.
Check out insurance etc; make sure it’s all protected if she has a fire or flood.
Best try to do it at arms length, with a solicitor involved who can keep it even handed.

I think she is taking the piss with the Council Tax.

With maintenance I would ask her to let one of the men know what the problem is and they can either sort the problem or sort out a tradesperson. Some people call a tradesmen for very basic DIY.

What would his father have wanted?

This squabbling is awful. The woman has lost her husband, she’s their step mother. She’s about to loose her home and they are going to hugely benefit.

Would his father have wanted this? Or would he have wanted his sons to maintain the home when his wife lived in it, treat her with some respect and then sell it and take their money after two years.