Social services trying to get my kids adopted

[Mumofallboys]

Please don't judge me I dont really have no one to talk to I've been going through a court battle since June last year foghti g to keep my kids and everytime the judge Sat's they don't meet the threshold I recently joined a dating website out of stress and boredom I started talking to a guy and invited him to my house ss found out and
Threatened to go back to court to get my kids into care my final hearing is 6 weeks away and I'm scared I will lose my kids

How did SS find out about the meeting with the man online? Are your kids on the at risk register?

Whats your solicitor and the guardian saying?

For at least the next six weeks if not much longer you have to be squeaky clean. Your house needs to be immaculate ( take photos) fridge stocked with nutritious food. Children spotless and absolutely no dating. No men.
You want to keep your children you must do everything by the book for the foreseeable future.
Go on every course, embrace the advice and don’t allow anything to stop you being the very best parent.
Yes you may feel stressed but find healthy ways of dealing with it.
I know the pressure much be enormous op, but use that pressure to keep you focused on operating to the best of your abilities.
You can do this op. Kids come first over and above all else and you won’t go far wrong.

Are they involved specifically because of the DV

Kids come first over and above all else and you won’t go far wrong

This OP with bells on

Hi. Did any problems arise as a result of inviting him in.
It is such a lonely position for you . Could you ask for a volunteer from Homestart, or start going to some other group that would be safe.
Maybe if you talked to Childrens Services about feeling lonely and asked for help in developing a safe support network? Do you get any respite.
Have you broken a contract because that is serious. Speak to your solicitor and follow their advice..
I hope you get an opportunity to demonstrate that you have learned from this.

How did the SS find out about the stranger visiting your home? Did something happen?

I'm sorry but there's more to this I think.

Ss wouldn't want to take your children for adoption for dv you've escaped from and a random hook up?

Do exactly as they say and focus on the kids and your lives together

I'd ask your solicitor and the guardian if theres anything further that can be done to keep your children at home with you.
I'd get yourself some support as well, is there anyone who can help you?

There is a lot more to it @ballsdeep I agree with you

Are you saying your ds is in foster care because of his own behaviour? As in it's your ds's fault that he got removed???

There is a lot of inhumane SS out there , yes there are some good ones but there is all so inhuman ones too!

I do have to say I think there is lore to this story though?

No one can help OP unless you tell us everything Or at least most of it?

From a social work point of view they don't WANT to take kids away from their homes/families unless there is a high risk to thr children, there is not enough money in social care or Foster carers to take kids willy nilly.

You need to follow ss to a tee and steer clear of any relationships or dating until you are in a "safe" and much less vulnerable situation. It is important to be seen as being proactive in taking ss advice and going above and beyond in proving you are more than capable x

It sounds like there was much more to this, I hope you get some help

Also have you looked into the freedom project for women who have experienced dv?

There is loads more to this.

SS don't just adopt out kids. It takes years.

OP start being honest.

Are you getting help with the court case in real life?

It's very unclear what's happening but if social services had grave concerns your children would not be with you:

Do you mean that the court is for the son in foster care? I can see he might be at the stage of adoption.

Do you mean that they at the same time seeking a care order for the DC who lives with you?

If they wanted your children adopted they wouldn't be with you. They'd be in foster care.

Contact Women’s Aid for their Freedom Programme.

I have to say I would be fucking terrified if they wanted to force my children into adoption!...This sounds inhumane to me.

'They' don't force children into adoption. A court only servers parental rights in the most extreme cases to protect a child from serious harm (often too late).

I've reported this post and would strongly advise people not to believe everything you read on the internet.

@OP. Your children will not be taken into care just because you had a one night stand. If your son is still living with you then he is not at immediate risk of adoption.

If foster care is being considered for him then you will have had an action plan from social services with specific targets. If you post those then people will be able to give more practical advice.

This website is a much better source of help than MN:
www.frg.org.uk/

You’re being really cagey with the details OP. People can’t help if they don’t have the full story.

Are there any other major concerns regarding the care/safety etc you provide the children? It sounds like you honestly regret the decision to allow a stranger into your house if you explain that in court hopefully they will see it was a one off but ss may see it as a danger it will happen again, which obviously is a major risk. Hopefully it gets sorted and what's best for the little ones is the end product. SS are really not keen on strangers coming into the house with children, when they were involved with my DD everyone who I had over ,even family, was subject to a police record check. My advice would be to not do anything like that again even when ss are gone as it could be any weirdo that comes in.