4 kids 3 under 5 think i may be pregnant again

[claire103]

Omg what am i going to do. Anyone been in same situation? Any advice?

Aww this thread is sad Claire . I know it's daunting with 3 young children and one older child but do you think you and the children would be happier without him? Sorry I know it's easier as an outsider to say 'leave him' and it's not normally advice I would give but you seem so utterly worn down and terrified of being pregnant with him again. The fact that he never lets you go anywhere without him is a little odd and very worrying. Is it that he forbids you to go out alone? Or just that (like me and DH) it just seems easier for us to usually be together out and about when he's not at work. Doesn't seem like a happy relationship . For me, I'd just say to DH 'Shit, I think I may be pregnant again and I can't settle til I know for sure so I am going to get a test.' Simple. If it's not that simple for you and you don't want him to know then why are you with him?

I really hope you aren't pregnant because it seems like something else to tie you down and keep you trapped there. Good luck and keep us posted. x

Claire How are you? Managed to get a test yet?

Claire - if you want to be single and not with him anymore you can do that now!

Has he isolated you from your friends and family? And anger problems - that is not an excuse for him being mean to you. Please will you contact Women's Aid? You mustn't stay with him just because he is their father.

Such a worrying post Claire. You're clearly not happy and are isolated from friends and family. No other adult should have that kind of power over another. There appears to be no balance in your relationship and whilst most of us can have a moan about our partners, at the end of the day they're niggles and moans. Unfortunately your problems are only going to get worse. If you're unable to have a say in whether your 4 year old plays GTA then I imagine there are many other things in which you have no control.

I would strongly suggest you get some advice regarding your relationship issues. There are people and organisations out there who can help. Do you stay with him because it seems the easier option? I think you need to put your children first and remove them from what sounds like a very unhealthy environment. I don't mean to sound unsympathetic, but you really have to think of what's best for them - and for you. He doesn't sound like he fits the bill at all.

You've taken the first step and posted on here. Now take the next. And then the next.

claire, I am so sad reading your last update.
Nobody should have to live like that.
Do you feel threatened by your H when you talk to him? Do you feel safe?

Whenever you might feel the time is right have a look at Woman's Aid - there's lots of information and support out there.
Please don't feel you have no options, also (and particularly) for your children's sake. They need at least one of their parents to be the adult.

why has my thread been reported?

No idea! Nothing offensive or anything. Only reason I can think of is someone for some silly reason has reported it...

It's still here so feel free to ask for advice or just to talk. How are you feeling today? X

Could it have been reported to move into relationships, you may get some great help there, just like you have here

Please OP get some help

You would cope better with your life without another baby (your dh) hanging around too lazy to work, not letting you get on with you life.

it says 'bit suspect this one' . what have i done wrong? only came on here for some advice. i'm ok thanks for everyone whos shown concern i've decided to just wait and what will be will be. he's playing playstation as we speak, no idea how i feel or does he even care. i'll just try and be the best mom i can to my kids, thats all that matters.

There was a thread on PG that got deleted because apparently "they had some concerns" not seen the OP of that thread post again. Yet their was nothing concerning about that thread only that she was young (18) and asking for advice...

Thread deleted
Message from MNHQ: We had some concerns about this thread so we've zapped it.

This is what MN said when they deleted that thread on pregnancy forum...

So maybe they're doing the same again...

Anyway! claire please stick around and talk to us whenever you feel like it. For advice or just to chat. You shouldn't have to be in such a awful sitiation xx

it said it was someone called bertiebotts, i don't know who this is. if they would like to explain!!!!

thanks multiplemama its really nice to know theres someone out there to listen. much appreciated. i'll post tomorrow if i'm still on here

I've seen the username of a few threads mainly "AIBU" but no idea why they would report this one as they haven't even replied. Very strange

If for some reason they do delete this thread (no idea why they would though!) feel free to PM me if you ever want to chat! :)

Is it normal that you're told that your thread is reported, and by whom?

No idea. I know I get a email/reply from MN when I've reported my own posts for deletion... so who knows.

yeah you get an email saying whos reported you and why. still don't understand her problem though?????

Hi OP.

I really do think you need to seek some RL support for your situation. Having children with somebody does 'tie' you to them but it doesn't mean you have to stay with them.
He doesn't sound like a good father or husband. Sorry.
I hope things improve ad you take some of the good advice given

Do you really get an email sayingvwhose deleted you and why?

Discussing and naming a poster who has reported you is pretty bad form imo. And it's not really that hard to understand why you were reported - this is the internet after all and not everyone tells the truth or is who they say they are. The person who reported you followed mumsnet guidelines by reporting the thread instead of posting which allowed MNHQ to have a look and decide what to do.

But why have mn told her who it is and why? That seems really inflammatory

I agree Owllady, I didn't know they did that and I'm not very happy if that's standard practice.

I have poste a thread in site stuff asking MNHQ about the naming of posters who report you.